Once upon a time, Pit's mother, Lady Palutena was strapping Pit's hinde end. For once again, Pit had failed geometry. "YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST EARN AN A- AND GET AWAY WITH IT!?" Palutena had shouted.
"Agh! Mother I am SO sorry! I promise I'll do better next time!" Pit had cried out.
"There's not going to be a next time when I'm through with you!" Yelled Palutena.
Later in Pit's room...
Pit was laying on his bed in his room, face down. Pit was rubbing his sore end when he said "Why do I have to be perfect? I don't want to be perfect. I thought no one was supposed to be perfect... Then why does Mother expect me to be perfect?"
"Hey cutie." Said an unexpected voice.
"Argh!" Yelled Pit sitting bolt upright, soon regretting sitting.
"Ow..." Said Pit as he fell on all fours. "Oh, it's just you Link... How'd you get in?"
"Your window is open." said Link, pointing to the window behinde him.
"But... we're on the second story..." said Pit, puzzled.
"When you're in love, you can do all sorts of amazing things." Said Link, creepily.
"Leave me alone." said Pit, falling on his stomach.
"Aww... what's wrong little guy." asked Link, sitting on the bed next to the defeated Pit.
"I... failed geometry." said Pit.
"What grade did you get?"
"An A-..."
"What!? That's not failing."
"Oh yeah? And what did you get?"
"That doesn't matter! What really matters is-"
"You got an A didn't you?"
"Well... I may have gotten 104%... But like I was saying..."
"You know what Link? I don't care. Go away."
"Whoa. Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Or something..."
"Link... If you don't mind me asking... have you ever had your feathers beat off of you before?"
"Well, I don't have feathers. But if your asking if I've ever been beat before then no. I haven't. But I think that's just your mothers way for expressing she loves you!"
"What the heck's that supposed to mean? Bruises are love?"
"Exactly. If you want I can give you some bruises right now. If you know what I mean." Link said, with a wink.
"And you wondered why I told you to get out of my room." said Pit, exhausted.
"... My offer still stands." said Link, evilly.
"We are not going to get my Mother into an "accident"" said Pit, unconvincingly.
"But it wasn't our fault that skateboard at the top of the staircase in a dark house was there!" said Link innocently.
"Link... You could cut my Mom's legs off, she'd just get back up and destroy you." said Pit
"True... OH! Rememeber the second reason why I'm here! The first was to see if you would finally love me. The second reason was to ask if your Aunt Medusa got out of prison yet." said Link.
"What? Why do you care where my Aunt Medusa is at?" asked Pit, alarmed.
"Let's just say, I'm into statues." said Link.
"I do hope you realize that my Aunt Medusa is serving life in prison for murdering random citizens and then covering there bodies in cement." said Pit.
"Yes, well you see, I'm studying psychology of mass murders and I... didn't know who else to turn to..." said Link.
"Describe her as the second craziest woman on this universe. She owned a bunch of snakes and statues of people who had just recently gone missing. The end." said Pit.
"Who's the first craziest then?"
"My mother."
"Oh yeah."
"Link, can you let me sleep now?" asked Pit.
"Need someone to cuddle?" asked Link, once agaign being creepy.
"No. Just go back out the way you came." said Pit pointing towards the window.
"You're right... after I would be finished with you, your ass would hurt ten times more."
"LINK! I already told you-" started Pit.
"Your right. Your mother would totally obliterate you if you were "teen pregnant" and you would be after I was through with you..."
"I'm not gay. Now go away before I stab you."
"Harsh. BYE PIT I LOVE YOU!" shouted Link, jumping out the window.
"Pit who's that I hear in you room?" Called Lady Palutena, walking rapidly towards Pits room.
"Nooooo... not again..." Pit moaned into his pillow.
