First story, a horrible attempt at humor, the works. There is a plot, I'll get to it soon
Suggestions, Ideas welcome. Hope you like it. Review? :)
Disclaimer: Characters, Disney, beef jerky is definitely not mine. I QQ
Larxene tapped her foot impatiently, as she leaned on the snow white wall of the library room.
'I said urgent, right? So why are they so late? Do they want to get electrocuted? Do they? HUH?'
She blew a stray antenna away from her narrowing eyes and eyed the door, located all the way on the other side of the small room. Two minutes passed and she started seeing red. A mere second before the lean nymph decided to destroy and wreck every text she could see, the handle turned and the door opened.
"'Bout time! What the hell were yo—what the... Sora?" Widening her eyes, Larxene dropped the dusty magic book and stepped forward.
He struck a sparkling pose, did his hair shake... flip thing and winked, with a peace sign to boot.
"Hi Larxene! I heard you needed help, heh heh. Don't worry! Your hero Sora is here to save the day once again! With my trusty sidekicks Donald and Goofy in portable form. Cool, huh?"
"No. That's... that's just stupid. What the hell are you doing here, you scrawny shrimp?"
Not a moment after the words left her mouth his lip turned into a pout and he crossed his arms, "You don't want me Larxeney? I'll help rescue Namine! I gotcha!" Donald and Goofy popped out of his baggy pant pockets and climbed up to pat Sora's head, shouting sweet comforting words in the little boy's ear.
'What the shit? Didn't mean to make the kid cry or whatever..' "Uh... Sure Sora. You can come as long as you don't get in the way I guess. There there..?"
He sniffed loudly and wiped his snotty snot on his sleeve hurriedly, sending his sidekicks flying.
"Hey kid, need a tissue? I don't have one.. but you know."
"Shut up Axel, whats the point of asking if you don't have one, geez."
Larxene looked up from the honking Sora to the new two visitors walking through the library door. Axel huffed and stared in a random direction as the smaller boy smirked and went to comfort his other. The redhead walked a few feet before plopping dramatically in a chair quite too small for his tall figure.
"I was being polite, Roxas... Something you are clearly not. Larxeneee, save me from this tormenting little boy! He's been making me do things for him all day: Cleaning his room, cooking for him, random shit that This Beast is too above to do! Got it memorized?"
Roxas's eye twitched as he placed his hand on Sora (who was already starting to perk up like a flower or something like that) and he grimaced, hearing the dreadful repetitive catchphrase. Axel would never shut up, and he was the one who was around to hear it the most, dear God.
"Shut up Axel", Zexion murmured from a far corner of the room, "Wait what the heck? How'd you get there Zex-", "I was here the entire time, Larxene. It is not my problem if you are simply oblivious to your surroundings."
She huffed and sunk into a chair next to Axel's. "You coulda said somethin, you know. I was waiting on you guys, and actually I still am. Where the fuck is everyone?"
Sora popped his head up, full re-energized from his earlier breakdown. "I saw Demyx outside in town eating ice cream with Luxord! They were laughing and all buddy buddy and
stuff."
Zexion slammed his thick book shut and rose from his solitary chair in the far corner. "Demyx and Luxord barely speak to one another, to suggest that they are 'buddy buddy' is ridiculous."
"Is it really, Zexion? Don't need to cover it up, just snatch up the kid before that old man does. Do like a sneaky romantic date or something. With ice cream. Got it memori-"
Roxas slammed a nearby lamp in his face.
Zexion threw the large blue book at his head.
Riku and Kairi smirked as they entered, "Haha, nice double penalty." "Hehe, good going Axel. Be more careful the next time you're a big fat jerk!"
Shaking his head, Roxas sighed, "It's not that..." 'It's that stupid catchphrase! It's so stupid! Like penguins! Stupid! And lame! Did I say that out loud?
Axel sputtered and spit a dripping page out of his mouth and sat up straight "What was that for? You jerks, can't handle a suggestion! And what was that about penguins Roxie?"
"I didn't ask for you input you know."
"I gave it anyway! Got it memorized?"
"Axel just shut up and don't talk. For the sake of my sanity. And don't call me Roxie."
"Hiiii Roxieeeeeeee..."
Larxene kicked Axel in the shins to cease their arguing and regarded the number of people in the room. Note, three of them that she was sure she didn't invite, but whatever.
"Is this everyone? If I remember, Xemnas" "Mansex", Axel spoke up before he was swiftly kicked once more, "Saix, Xaldin, Lexaeus, Luxord and etcetera"
"Marluxia and Vexen", Roxas corrected.
"Whatever. Just left half an hour ago on a vacation to the beach, am I right? I am. So we're only missing Demyx. Where is he?"
Sora raised a finger and opened his mouth, and Roxas just as quickly covered it before he could start up detailing Demyx and Luxord's date once more.
'Dang I'm so fast. And cool. I got it all... where are the ladies? No one loves me!'
Sora raised his eyes to glance at the teary blond and wiggled, "Mmph!" but it was to no avail.
'I can see the twinkles in his eyes. Roxas is kinda weird... Anyway.' The peppy brunette concentrated his mind, furrowing his brows, and bit his Nobody's hand with the force of Hercules... probably.
"Ow! What the heck Sora?" He yanked his hand away as if Sora was diseased, "That's nasty!"
He put his short little arms on his womanly hips and faced the world, a.k.a the Organization. "I am the Man! And I command you all to get me bananas! You don't want to refuse The Man."
"What do you think they're doing out there, Donald? Shucks, it's pretty cramped in here." Goofy tried to unsuccessfully move his feet from the uncomfortable position of under his buddy's butt. His buddy's very big butt.
"Grr... I don't know, but they better hurry up and start the journey! There's no time to waste at a time like this. And move your elbows, they're stabbing me."
"Gawsh, Donald, I would if I could but this pocket is too small. And not that I'm complaining, you know, but I smell beef jerky in here."
"..."
"Do you think he carries a lamp in his pants? It's very dark in here. Hey, you have magic! Why don't we-"
Demyx walked the quiet light halls and thought. Deeply. Yes, he thought quite deeply about life. And the stars. And his sitar. And Larxene. Larxene? What the... oh shit.
Nearly dropping his sitar and messing up his mullet in his sudden spin, the young man began racing to the other side of the castle with hopes that he wouldn't die so young, leaving dusty imprints in the fluffy cloud carpet in his tracks.
Huffing and slightly sweating, he placed his hands on his knees to catch his breath and gather his smooth attitude, he took one last run through his hair before sighing and pushing back the library door.
"Hi guys! Hope I wasn't too late. Traffic, you know. And stuff."
His relaxing watery life flashed before his sight as the noise instantly hushed and all eyes in the room settled on him, Sora's manly pose frozen as his grin spread.
Larxene's bright orbs flashed with murder.
