A/N. This is my first fanfic.

Summary: Emmett has made a discovery.

Disclaimer:

Mr. Snowy: Heck Naw she don't own Twilight. I'm all dis fool gots

Gifts: Thnx…

Emmett POV

"ROSE!" I yelled running down the stairs.

Rose: What do you want, now?"

"Rose I'm FAT"

"Emmett. You are a VAMPIRE. Your body cant change."

"You're kidding, right? I did too!!!!!!!!!!! I used to have a dainty 15inch waist. Now its like 20"

"Ah Shut UP"

"Fine then. I'll go tell my problems to… EDWARD. EDWARD!"

Edward's POV

Damn. I wonder what he wants now.

Emmett yells, " EDWARD EDWARD EDWARD EDWARD!"

"What?" I reply

"Edward, I'm FAT"

You've GOT to be kidding me…

"Emmett, your body can't change"

"Why does everyone keep saying that?"

"BECAUSE ITS TRUE. Now go away"

"Fine then. I'll go tell— "

Alice says, " Don't even think about it!"

Emmett POV

Aw. No one loves me. No one cares that I'm fat. Maybe I should go die.

Mr. Snowy says, " I will always love you. Even though you're fat. Don't go die."

Aw someone loves me.

I reply, " Hey you called me fat."

"Sorry"

"Apology accepted. Will you marry me?"

"No"

" I thought you loved me"

"I don't go that way"

" Oh…"

Mr. Snowy pulls out a gun and everything goes dark.

THE END.

Edward says, "Emmett. Get up. You cant be killed by a gun"

Mr. Snowy says, " He can't"

Mr. Snowy pulls a blow torch and everything goes black…again.

THE END. (Again.)