Author's Note:- "You like someone who can't like you back because unrequited love can be survived in a way that once requited love cannot." -John Green

Disclaimer:- Jo Rowling is queen of my heart.


"You're different." Marlene McKinnon looked at her best mate through squinting eyes. "What's different about you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, Marly." Mary MacDonald suddenly became very interested in her pancakes.

"It's her hair." A few seats away Lily Evans spoke up with an apologetic smile. "Sorry, Mar", she added as Mary groaned in frustration.

"Mary. Not again." Several voices spoke up this time.

Mary MacDonald was something of a hair enthusiast. She had gone from various shades of brown to black to blonde and even pink once. (Although that was mostly James' fault). On the morning of October 3rd her hair was brown again. (It had previously been auburn.)

"Do you realize how bad it's getting? I hardly even notice the difference anymore."

"Oh honestly, Marlene. Don't exaggerate."

"It's true, MacDonald," Sirius said from behind the morning paper. "I dare you to go a month without dying your hair again."

Mary narrowed her eyes at the Marauder in question. "I'm sorry to say you've lost that bet before it's even begun, Sirius. I've thrown all my hair potions out this morning. All of them. What you're looking at is the real Mary MacDonald. So, what do you think?"

Marlene couldn't help but smile. "You always look beautiful, Mar." Mary smiled back at her best friend.

"She's right, you know." Reginald Cattermole hugged his girlfriend from behind and the moment was over.


On the second Hogsmeade weekend of the year Marlene McKinnon turned down seven invitations from six willing boys. (Benjy Fenwick, the poor lad, had asked twice.)

"Marlene, are you sure you're okay with going alone? I could always reschedule with James."

Marlene smiled weakly at the redhead. "Oh no you don't. That boy has waited much too long for today. Honestly, I fear for his health."

"I fear for yours," Lily replied.

Mary rolled her eyes as she pulled off her top. "Don't pity her Lily. She had five perfectly nice boys to choose from."

Marlene averted her eyes. "Six, actually."

"Fenwick doesn't count. Desperation is not a virtue, dear Marly. Now, what do you think?" she asked, holding up two sweaters. "The white or the green?"


"Marlene!" Mary MacDonald pushed her way through the crowd and tackled her best friend with a hug. "Oh, Marly! You have no idea how great it is to see you! I have so much to tell you."

"Do you? Didn't seem like it," the blonde replied. Mary's smile fell.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Nothing…it's just…you didn't reply to any of my letters."

"Oh!" Mary smiled with an apology in her eyes. "Well, I was just so busy with the Cattermoles and all…but I'm here now, aren't I?"

Marlene smiled back. "You're here now."

Mary squealed in delight and pulled Marlene towards the stairs. "Come on. You will not believe what Reg gave me for Christmas."


Marlene walked back from the headmaster's office in a daze. This was the chance of a lifetime. To actually make a difference. To fight back.

Unknowingly she changed course and found herself by the steps to the Astronomy Tower. She wasn't all that surprised. It's where they would go to think. She was, however, surprised to see it was already occupied.

"Mary."

The brunette turned her head and smiled while patting the space next to her. They sat in silence for a while.

"He wants you to join, doesn't he?" Mary whispered.

Marlene looked at her best friend in shock. "He asked you too? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because he didn't. Lily told me. He asked her too, you know. And James. And Sirius. And Remus. And Peter. Even Dorcas…but not me."

"Mary, I'm sure that doesn't mean anything. Besides, if you want to fight, there's nothing stopping you."

Mary sighed. "Dumbledore is a smart man, Marly. He's barely spoken two words to me my entire life and still he knows."

"He knows…what?" Marlene asked hesitantly.

"I'm weak. I'm weak and I'm shallow and I don't care. There is a war going on outside these halls and I'm happy to just sit here and forget."

"There's a difference between being scared and being weak, Mar. I'm a muggleborn too, remember? You think I don't know how you feel? We're scared and that's exactly why we have to fight back. So we don't have to be scared, scared to walk down the street or tell someone who our parents are. I don't want to be scared anymore."

"Don't do it." Mary turned to face her friend, her best friend. "Don't join them. We could run away. Live as muggles until the war ends."

Marlene scoffed disbelievingly. "Who? You, me and Cattermole?"

Mary smiled weakly. Her eyes were full of tears. "I never expected you to say yes. You're too stubborn. I just want you to be safe. To not have to worry about you all the time. To not be scared that one night you won't come home."

"It's not your job to be scared for me, Mary."

Mary looked at her friend, her face a picture of confusion and hurt. "Marly, you mean everything to me."

"Don't do that. Merlin, Mary. That's not fair. You do not get to use my feelings for you to get what you want. I won't let you."

Mary looked down at her hands, ashamed. "How long have you known…that I know?"

"You're not exactly the world's best actress," Marlene answered. "You've been watching what you say around me and you don't talk about Cattermole as much." Marlene took a deep breath. Her voice was less shaky as she continued. "I didn't recognize it at first. That look in your eyes that hadn't been there before. But you feel sorry for me, don't you? Because you don't love me. Because you can't."

Mary looked straight ahead, her tears blurring her vision as Marlene got up to leave.

"Just so you know…I said yes. I told Dumbledore I didn't need until the end of the year to think about it."

"I expected as much."


Dear Mary,

It's been a long time. I cannot tell you how many times I've rewritten this letter and I cannot tell you how many times I've wished we could go back in time and relive the days when our biggest problems were OWL's and boys and passing Transfiguration. I hope you are well.

If you read the papers, you will know why I am writing to you. I would give so much to be able to have this conversation with you in person. To have any conversation with you at all. But when you and Reginald went into hiding you did a good job of it. So, I am writing this letter because I could not bear it if you did not know the truth. The truth is, she loved you. And she missed you. And she fought bravely until the very end.

Lots of love,

Lily

P.S. - We've had a baby boy and his name is Harry. One day he'll hear stories of his brave Aunt Marlene. I hope he'll hear them from you.


- The End -

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