A night in the mind of a mad man

In his mind he sees his baby, Dru, as she rips the head off a little girl. She smiles as she kicks and throws the ball. She laughs and begs him to join her. He refuses and she transforms into her vampire visage. Then she continues to transform into Buffy. The blonde stares at him and asks him if he's okay. "I feel like water on a clear day. I'm too pure. I'm too good and clean. There used to be only black and now there's all kinds of colour. I'm like a rainbow that no one will ever see." He replied looking off to his left to see a rat scurry by. The rat looked at him, winked at him and then took the form of Angelus. "Spike, what's happened to you? I mean, I got my soul and I was fine but you? You're a mess man!" Angel stands there and then Dru comes up beside him. They kiss and spike feels jealousy boils inside him. "I don't love you anymore. I love Buffy! Go away! You're tinting my whiteness! Leave you bloody idiots!" And they did. He stared after him and he looked at the ceiling, but there wasn't one. Instead he saw the moon. Dru had once had a vision about the moon bleeding. He had thought her madness alluring. Now though, he experienced her madness. On the first night here he had found the doll. She was broken all over. He had tried to suck its blood but it was empty. Another vampire had beaten him to the chase. He smelt something. It was like flowers and berries. Buffy came up to him. He reached out to touch her and felt her. She was real. She asked him if he knew anything. "I know too much. I know how to snap someone's neck, I know how to tie a knot that no one can wriggle out of and I know what I did and I care. I care to much. I loved and now I pay. I have a soul and it makes me feel." "Spike, listen to me. We are battling a big demon and we don't know what he is called but he like ice." Buffy said. " Can you help?" "Sorry love, the kittens have come out to play and are asking for their milk. I have to find their mommy." "Spike!" Buffy yells at him. He looks at her and he sticks his nose up. She slaps him for his arrogance. He walks away and grabs a knife. He has thought about killing himself but he realized he would have to live with the guilt of killing someone. He picked up the rope and gave it to Buffy. Then he handed her the knife. "Buffy you have to kill me. Make it quick; no make it slow I need to feel the pain. Hurry up before I change my bloody mind. I know you can do it. You want to do it so just turn the knife into wood and stake me." But she was gone. The light streamed in and he went to bed. A night in the mind of a mad man.