A/N: So this is my first Avengers/Marvelverse fic... Ever since I saw Thor and the Avengers I've felt bad for Loki... I feel like, he's not really evil, he's just crying out for attention, and going thru huge emotional turmoil. I feel like he wasn't hugged and praised enough as a child, at least by Odin. So I'd say this is sort of Character Study, delving into Loki's emotions and thoughts and feelings.
Spoiler Alert: I'm giving fair warning that if you have not seen The Avengers, turn back now because there are some MAJOR spoilers.
Disclaimer: I own nothing... it all belongs to Stan Lee, Marvel and Disney.
Loki always had a talent for Magic ever since a young age. When other boys were learning hand-to-hand combat and other fighting techniques, he was in the library reading spell books and exploring his natural talent for Magic. He was always teased and ridiculed for 'wasting his time' with reading and magic. His so-called father, Odin, would encourage him to choose a weapon and master its use in battle. Loki chose throwing knives because he never wanted to be close enough to his enemy that hand-to-hand combat was required. It was not that he was inept, he just preferred not to.
Living in the shadow of Thor was never easy. He constantly heard people wondering aloud why he was not more like his brother. He always felt like the outcast among the other Asgardians. After Thor had been banished to Midgard, and he discovered his true parentage it made sense to him why he was never good enough. He was a runt among the Frost Giants, unwanted and unloved, and he was simply a pawn to Odin to be used; a stolen relic from the ashes of a war gone by.
He wanted so desperately to prove himself worthy to the only father he had ever known, he went down a dark path. He could still remember the disappointed look Odin gave him as he was dangling off the end of the broken Bifröst Bridge, holding onto Odin's staff. He remembers letting go of the staff as his brother could do nothing but hang from Odin's grasp, watching Loki fall into the closing portal. He remembers waking up among the Chitauri, still desperate to prove he could be as good as Thor, desperate for revenge. He remembers underestimating the group of mortals, who called themselves 'The Avengers', that Thor aligned himself with. He remembers severely underestimating the green monstrosity called the Hulk. He remembers the Hulk simply grabbing his leg and literally swinging him around like a rag doll, smashing him into the concrete, then leaving him to lay, unable to move, barely able to breath let alone think. Soon the other Avengers were there just as he regained the strength to move. Ironman somehow got out of his damaged suit of armor while his brother looked down at him in a mixture of what Loki could only describe as disappointment and shame. The Man of Iron put on a new suit of armor and the Avengers transported him to a S.H.I.E.L.D. facility, locking him in another prison meant for the green rage monster. As Loki sat in his cell, he couldn't help but contemplate his life thus far and everything that led up to this point. When he looked up he noticed a woman standing outside his cell, watching him.
"Who are you?" he sneered.
"Darcy… you're Thor's brother, right?"
"No, not his brother…"
"But you're Loki, right?"
"I am, what of it?" Loki seethed.
"Once Thor was done smooching Jane, I talked to him… about you… and I have to admit, after meeting Thor in New Mexico, I did a lot of reading about Norse Gods…"
"What is your point, if you even have one, Mortal?"
"I kind of get why you've done some of the things you've done… like… the whole thing with your brother, and Jutenheim, his banishment… convincing Laufey to kill Odin, just so you could save Odin and destroy Jutenheim… I don't agree with your methods… but I get where you were coming from…" Darcy sympathized.
"You dare to presume you know of my motivations?" Loki condescended.
"You're kind of transparent, dude. I mean really… it's not unique to you… Even us mortals feel that way sometimes. You were jealous of all the attention Thor got and you wanted your father's approval. Then you find out you're adopted after how many years?"
"Millennia."
"Okay… so several thousand years of not knowing? That's pretty harsh… and then add that to always being compared to your older brother, and craving Odin's approval? Yeah, I can see why you went a little psycho… not sure what made you think taking over the earth was such a good idea, though…"
"Because you mortals were made be ruled."
"Yeah… about that… I don't know what school is like in Asgard, but they must not require history of the other realms, because if you knew anything about earth, it's that when Evil Dictators try to take over the world, they eventually fail because people rise up and revolt against it. Humans kinda don't like being told what to do… we tend to get a little pissy about it."
"Dictator? No, I was going to be King!"
"Um… yeah, again… if you look at American History, which is where the all of the Avengers are from, except the Black Widow, you'd know we don't really like kings either. We had an entire revolution because we didn't like the King who was trying to rule us from across an ocean. We thought he was being an unfair ruler, so we revolted against him and despite England having a bigger army and a navy, we kicked their booty with just a militia and a little bit of help from the French towards the end because the French hated the English."
"Does Midgard not have a single ruler?"
"Uh… No. Never. There's like… a bazillion different countries and each country has their own rulers."
"Bazillion is not a real number."
"Yeah, okay whatever, I didn't mean it to be… I dunno exactly how many countries there are, but there's a lot, and they all have their own systems of government. There has never been, and never will be, a Ruler of Earth. People have tried, but we're too stubborn to let that happen."
"So it would seem." Loki deadpanned.
"Oh… and… um… Thor kinda told me about who your real father was… Laufey… and Thor also told me about the Frost Giants and what Asgardians feel about them… and um… I just have this to say. You're not a monster because you're a Jotun by birth… If you are a monster at all, it is because you have done monstrous things, and that has nothing to do with your ancestry or lineage, or whatever… that has to do with your own personal choices… but like I said, other than the whole take over the earth thing and trying to you know… destroy an entire realm… the stuff you did in Asgard with your father and Thor… I get it… I don't agree with the methods, but I get it."
"You know nothing of me; I am a monster… a stolen relic by Odin until he might have had use of me." Loki scoffed.
"Uh… no, he found you abandoned, left to die, and he took you in, and raised you as a son." Darcy pointed out.
"You do not know of what you speak."
"Then enlighten me." Darcy challenged.
"Why do you care?" Loki questioned.
"Because I do."
Loki rolls his eyes at the mortal in front of him, "You want to know of Odin's confession to me? Fine. He told me that when he took me as an infant, he thought that through me there could be a permanent peace between Asgard and Jutenheim, but those plans no longer mattered because of my idiotic brother."
"I'm guessing you're adding the 'idiotic brother' part? So, if I'm to understand correctly, Odin said he thought there could be a permanent peace between Asgard and Jutenheim but those plans no longer mattered… did he say why those plans no longer mattered?"
"No, but it doesn't take a genius to know it was because of Thor storming into Jutenheim and stirring up conflict."
"When he said that, what did you say?"
"I asked him if I was just another stolen relic until he might have use of me."
"And his response?"
"He asked why I twisted his words."
"Hm… I think you might have misunderstood his meaning when he said 'those plans no longer mattered' but I guess you didn't wait for him to explain."
"What possible meaning could he have had?" Loki seethed.
"Uh… that he loved you, he saw you as his son and he wasn't going to use you like that… Maybe he meant that when he first found you, his first thoughts were of creating peace through you, but once he got you home to Asgard and started raising you, those first thoughts were forgotten and dismissed. Did you ever think of that?"
"No." Loki admitted.
"Hm… maybe it's something to think about on your trip home to Asgard."
"It won't be a long enough trip, silly Mortal."
"Then something to think about until Thor comes to collect you to take you back to Asgard."
"Where is my idiot brother?"
"He's eating shawarma with the other Avengers in a sort of victory celebration for kicking ass." Darcy giggled.
"What in the name of Odin's Beard is 'shawarma'?"
Darcy began laughing hysterically, doubling over then eventually falling to the floor still cackling.
"What of Odin's Beard is so damned funny?" Loki demanded. Darcy began laughing harder, tears forming in her eyes from laughing so much, then began gasping for air and hiccupping between hysterical laughter.
"Woman, compose yourself!"
Darcy slowly regained composure, however was still hiccupping and gasping for air.
"Why were you laughing?"
"You…" Darcy started then began to laugh again, "You said…" she tried again between laughter, "said… o… Odin's… Odin's Beard…" she said then began laughing hysterically again.
"I don't understand why that is so hysterical."
"It's like cursing, Asgardian style!" Darcy giggled. Loki just rolled his eyes at Darcy.
"You never answered my question… what is 'shawarma'?"
"Um… it's a Middle Eastern dish… it's either beef, chicken or lamb meat with veggies wrapped in a pita or Lavosh. It's really yummy… although I prefer gyros… mmm… lamb gyros… damn it, now I'm hungry." Darcy pouted, "Hey you got magic, right? Can you magic me up some yummy lamb gyros?"
Loki raised an eyebrow, "Magic me up? What do you think I am, some Midgardian Magician who pulls rabbits out a hat?"
"Um… yes? But an Asgardian version? So… gyros please? Yes? No? Maybe?"
"No."
"Well… you suck… what good is having magic if you can't magic up some food? If I had magic, I'd magic up food, ice cream, new clothes… stuff like that."
"I prefer to use my magic much more creatively than that… like turning wine into snakes, creating doppelgängers of myself during a fight to confuse my enemies… things of that nature."
"You can make doppelgängers of yourself? That's awesome!"
"You know what that word means?" Loki asked skeptically.
"Uh, yeah, I'm not stupid contrary to popular belief. I'm just not science smart, like Jane. Hey, I got a question… I dunno if you'd know the answer, but have you seen Agent Coulson? He's kind of a short dude, with short brown hair, kind of a receding hairline… he's snarky with a deadpan witty sense of humor, always in a black suit… I haven't seen him since I got here, and I figured he would have found me by now and told me to stop fraternizing with the bad guy." Darcy giggled.
Loki smirked broadly, with an evil glint in his eyes, "I do know of this Agent Coulson… He hasn't come in here because he's dead."
"What? But… but… he's Agent Coulson, he's a badass mofo… he can't be dead!"
"Oh I assure you he is… I know because I killed him."
"You… you… jackass mother flipping ass-wipe!" Darcy cursed.
"How eloquent." Loki rolled his eyes.
Suddenly, Agent Hill came in and saw Darcy. "How did you get in here? This is a restricted zone."
"I dunno, I just wandered around until I came in here and saw him… he looked sad so I talked to him."
"That's Loki, the guy who destroyed most of Manhattan… you're not supposed to be talking with him." Agent Hill said, and then grabbed Darcy by the upper arm dragging her out of the room, leaving Loki alone with his thoughts once again.
A/N: Thank-you for reading. I hope you enjoyed... reviews are very much welcomed. They make me and Loki-Muse happy! So make Loki happy and review! yay!
As Always... Take What Ye Can... Give Nothin' Back!
VAMPIRE SOLIDARITY, RAH RAH RAH! (and all that!)
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