Michael Gutin
Perspective
"What happened this time?" Nabiki asked.
"It's over." Replied Ranma, in a tone that revealed nothing.
"What is?"
"The engagement."
"Again? What does that make it, the ninth time, or a nice even ten?"
"Very funny Nabiki, no really, you're fucking hilarious."
"Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed."
"Oh shut up, like you even care."
"Oh, but I do."
"Another joke, eh Nabiki?"
Nabiki could tell that by now that something was really wrong with Ranma. It was time to cut to the heart of the matter.
"All right Saotome, look, despite what you think, I really do care; you should really talk to someone about it."
"Someone? Don't you mean you, so can sell what I say off to the highest bidder?"
Nabiki didn't even flinch. Though it was shocking that Ranma would put it so bluntly, she knew that was how everyone saw her, and had come to terms with that long ago.
"All right, I deserved that one; I promise I won't tell a soul unless you want me to."
"Who says you'd be the one I want to talk to anyway?"
'What the hell could have changed him this much' thought Nabiki.
"Good point Saotome but let me tell why I am the best choice."
He snorted, "Let's hear it."
"Look Saotome, whatever it is that's happened obviously has you shaken up; right now you need a calm voice of reason to help you with what you're going to do."
Ranma looked at her for a second, before replying "You know what Nabiki? You're right. Huh, figures, doesn't it? Of all the people for me to come to in, I come to the person who has done nothing but take advantage of me from the day I first came here. It's ironic I guess, just like the rest of my life. That's me, Ranma Saotome, just one big irony, joke of the gods, that's me…"
"Joke of the gods? Still arrogant I see?"
Ranma flashed Nabiki a cocky grin.
"Of course."
"So that's it? You just wanted me to listen in on your little self-pity session?"
Ranma looked at Nabiki angrily, but then resumed his neutral expression.
"I deserve that one too I guess."
"So you gonna tell me or not? I don't have all day."
"Okay, okay. It started a couple hours ago. I was just minding my business when Ryoga jumps out screams 'Ranma prepare to die!' and attacks me."
"Business as usual."
"Yeah I know, anyway, we fight. Ryoga managed to catch me off guard and punched me in the gut and sent me flying, it was at that point I noticed Akane was watching, that last thing I hear from her before I hit the ground is her screaming 'Ranma stop picking on Ryoga!'"
"That sounds like Akane all right, so what's the problem?"
"Dammit Nabiki, that is the problem!"
"But that's what always happens Ranma."
"I know that. But, as I hit the ground, I had an epiphany."
"I didn't know that word was in your vocabulary."
"Shut up Nabiki, I'm getting to important part here."
"Fine, please continue."
"It was really weird actually; it came so suddenly, it really felt like it actually HIT me. All of sudden everything just came into perspective."
"What do you mean?"
"It's hard to describe…it's, it's almost like I wasn't Ranma anymore, I mean, I still was Ranma, but, it was almost like for a moment I was just an observer watching what was going on, instead of being a participant."
"Er…ok, go on."
"It just changed things for me…I looked at what was going on, do you know what I saw? I saw a boy, get attacked by someone whom the boy wanted nothing more than to be friends with, I saw that boy take a blow, which still hurts, and fall to the ground, and then I was that boy's fiancée, the person that is supposed to MARRY him, turn her back on him in the worst way possible."
"What do you mean, worst way? "
"She doesn't trust me, Nabiki, that's what I mean. All this time, all the things I've done from her, and I'm still that perverted jerk to her.
"You're overreacting, she trusts you some."
"Oh yeah, sure Nabiki. Can you honestly say that she would take my word over Ryoga's?"
"Well, no, but…"
"How about yours?"
"Maybe not, but I…"
"Or Kasumi's, or Mr.Tendos, or Dr. Tofu's perhaps?"
"Ok fine, you win that, but is that all?"
"No, you see, after all this hit me, it made me mad."
"Perfectly reasonable."
"So I told her what I felt, didn't yell, though I really wanted to, just calmly told her, that I was sick of it. That the fact that always picks Ryoga's side over me really hurt me, that her lack of trust in me was cruel. I said it all as rationally as I could. And then for the tiniest moment, Akane looked like she understood, like what I said got through to her. I was so happy Nabiki, I thought that we could finally stop all the stupid fighting, and…I don't know, do something, anything besides the same pointless insults."
"So what happened?"
"Then, she grew angry. As if I had done something wrong. As if I had been out of line in telling her this. As if everything bad between us was MY fault. And…do you know what she said to me? She said 'Why would I trust a pervert like you?'"
"…"
"That was the critical point Nabiki, what she said at that moment was more important than anything she had said before. And she called me a pervert. I gave her a chance to fix up our relationship, if you could call it that, and she totally and completely rejected me."
"So you…"
"I broke the engagement."
"What did she do?"
"Don't know. I ran off before I could see her reaction."
"Are you sure you did the right thing?"
"I'm…I guess I'm not sure Nabiki, but it felt like the right thing to do, and it still does."
"Even though she loves you?"
"Even though she loves me."
"What? No denial?"
"I know she loves me Nabiki, I knew ever since Jusendo, why else would she have done all those things for me?"
"But then why…"
"Why didn't I tell her as well? Nabiki, as the ice-queen of Furinkan I though that you of all people would understand. It's because it takes more than love Nabiki."
"Huh?"
"I'm not a romantic Nabiki, I never was, in a perfect world, perhaps love would be enough, and it would conquer anything that came in its way, and all lovers would be together for eternity, but that's not how it works. It takes more, so much more and I thought that we…that Akane and I could gain those things, eventually. I would have waited until I grew old and died for us to gain those things, if only Akane would do the same. But she rejected me, rejected us, in such a final way. This wasn't an 'I'm not ready' or a 'Let's take things slower' this was a one-hundred percent, final, 'kick him out and leave him to the dogs' rejection. Like I said, I'm not a romantic, but at that moment, I could swear my heart cracked, for the first time, I truly believe that we will never have those things. It hurts Nabiki, because I still love her, as much as ever, but if she acts this way there always be something stopping us from ever getting together, and I don't want that. I refuse to be a part of it."
"So what are you going to do now?"
"I don't know Nabiki, I honestly don't know."
The End
Author's Notes: Yup, nice little angsty-ish fan fiction that I wrote while sick. Yet another, "Ranma finally snaps" fic, but hey, for some reason I tend to like writing those. Anyway, this really is the end, unless a bunch of you write that you want a sequel. And if some of you think this fic resolved absolutely nothing, than: first of all I disagree, and second that's all the more reason to ask me to write a sequel. I know that some of you think I should write a sequel regardless of whether people want me to or not, but here's the thing: This is all new to me, not just the fan fiction, but the writing. Truth be told, Sick of It was the first serious fiction I've ever written in my life. And I've definitely never written anything like the above story before, and so I'm testing it. This kind of story isn't particularly appealing to continue, and if it turns out it sucks, then I've better things to write. However, if you people find it good, then I'm willing to put time and effort into furthering my experience with it. So there.
