Living by the book
Chapter 1
Worries and thoughts
Camille Bordey was sitting on the steps of her boss's beach shack, following a departing plane with her eyes and blinking back the tears as she watched it disappear. He was gone – and now what? She was somewhat surprised about how forlorn she felt – as if someone had cut off one of her limbs, she thought. Then, realising how dramatic that sounded, she snorted and reached into her pocket to retrieve a handkerchief so she could blow her nose and come back to her senses. He'd laugh if he knew about her thoughts. Or maybe he wouldn't – maybe he'd make a piercing remark or go off on one of his rants and tell her she was exaggerating or blowing things out of proportion. It wouldn't be the first time that he'd give her a piece of his mind.
And really, he'd be right to tell her off – after all, he'd only be gone for a week, and then he'd be back. So, why was she so emotional? In the meantime, she'd be in charge of running the station, and that was a thrilling prospect. She knew very well that she would be able to do it to everyone's satisfaction. She wasn't so keen on the paperwork connected to it, but she knew that she had the ability to be concise and to-the-point in her statements, and so she wasn't afraid of that part of it. Having the responsibility for the station was going to be fun. Really, why worry that he was gone? To a certain extent it was even exciting that she got the chance to prove herself… to whom in particular she wanted to prove herself, though, was a question she didn't want to examine too thoroughly at this point. She tried to convince herself that it was all for collecting brownie points with the Commissioner – it would look good in her file if she did a good job during DI Poole's absence, even if it was only for a week and it wasn't very likely that a major case would come up. But then again – you never knew… they had phases when they had endless series of petty theft, burglaries and other minor crimes, and then again, there were two murderers within a rather short period of time. You had to be prepared for everything. She liked excitement and diversity. So, in this context it was absolutely ridiculous to hang her head like this. She'd be fine, from a professional point of view.
Obviously, it wasn't the professional aspect that worried her. The thing was… would he come back? That was what was truly bothering her. He didn't seem to intend to leave for good, but then again – he hadn't intended to stay on Saint Marie after the murder of Charlie Hulme was cleared up, either. What if he took his chance to leave now? He had been tricked into staying, and he was fairly upset about it for a while. The Commissioner didn't want to let him go, and his old department in Croydon was way too happy to be rid of him (what a humiliating feeling that must have been for him, Camille thought… but after she had met Doug Anderson over a year ago, she was certain that Richard was far better off with his Saint Marie team than he could ever be with the Croydon team, and she had a notion that he was well aware of that, too), so he had to stay for an entire year. Then the Commissioner tricked him for a second time – he told Richard that he could have his old job back if he re-applied for it, but he only informed him when it was almost too late, anyway… and then Richard couldn't make the required call because he was in the last stage of solving a case, and once that was done, Fidel's wife Juliet had gone into labour so everyone was excited and went to the house to support the new parents – and Richard's phone didn't get a signal from there. So – he missed his chance, and he had to stay on… Come to think about it, he seemed disappointed at first, but Camille felt that once he had accepted it, he seemed to settle in a little better and got more into the island and its positive sides. Or had he just resigned himself to the circumstances – not accepted them? Admittedly, he wasn't good with changes – he liked to live by a routine and do things by the book. So, the Caribbean life was a challenge for him.
However… Although he still complained about sand, heat and bugs, and he had a hard time understanding people's mentality sometimes (sometimes? Most of the time!), his complaints were less elaborate, and he made an effort to be less annoying. Or at least it felt like that… Was it wishful thinking on her side?
Actually, these days, he was so much more human. Well, sometimes, at least. The tears welled up as Camille remembered how he had tried to "be supportive" when her friend Aimee was murdered. He had said some very strange things, but he really, really had tried, and she would never forget this. When she changed his TV stations to French channels, he was clearly unnerved, but he let her get away with it – he chased her down the beach, but it didn't have any serious consequences – they seemed to reach some kind of truce with one another. He never mentioned it again, and she realised now that she had never checked with him if he had been able to track down any British channels. She felt a bit ashamed, but then thought a little rebelliously that if he had wanted her to help with it, he should have asked. Or didn't he have the nerve to do so? He was terribly flustered around women… although he seemed to be more comfortable with her now than in the beginning of their cooperation. Well, that wasn't really a surprise, given the fact that they had had a really rocky start… neither of them had been happy to work with the other one, she even had to give him a dressing-down so he'd realise she wasn't just his maid-for-all-trades, but his partner - and considering all the arguments they had at first, they were doing rather well now.
When they recently got stranded in the weather station during the "almost hurricane", he opened up a little and gave her an unguarded glimpse into his personality, and when earlier this year – for the Erzulie festival – she had accidentally believed that he was the blind date that her mother had set up for her, she was excited at the prospect to spend the evening with him and get to know him from another side. She was disappointed when it turned out he just was waiting for Fidel to pick him up so he could babysit Rosie, and she did not want him to leave – and she resented the poor chap who had been her real date. Not that she let this guy feel that – after all it wasn't his fault – she was friendly with him, and they actually had had a nice enough evening - but she really, truly was crestfallen that she didn't get to spend the evening with Richard.
For a while she refused to take a closer look at her own feelings and didn't dare to analyse her emotions - she had told herself that it was all because they had just solved a rather upsetting case that made them both think, and she would have liked to discuss it further with him and ease the dark feelings that had come over her during the investigations. If she was honest with herself, though, that was only a pretext. She wanted to spend the evening with him because she felt there were sparks between them, and she had the impression that he was also sorry to leave… He had told her that she looked stunning, and the look in his eyes was definitely one of interest, perplexity and… a streak of something else she didn't quite find a notion for. She wished she had a better idea about his feelings. But he was so tight-lipped about anything that concerned emotions. She respected his inhibitions, had an idea of what his pet peeves were, and she certainly knew how to wind him up. He was a genius in his profession, and she had learnt a lot from him. His feelings, however, were off-limits – they were something he just didn't discuss. He clammed up as soon as the conversation got a little more personal. It was not that he was actively withholding information – he was just not sharing his emotions easily. The only times he showed passion was when he went off in a rant about something or when he started a long-winded lecture about some scientific phenomenon – he could get truly excited about that! He was a miracle to her in oh so many ways – and that fascinated her.
The realisation that he was becoming increasingly special and important to her had made her turn down all further attempts by her mother to arrange more blind dates for her. Not that Maman tried to set up blind dates habitually, but it did happen more or less regularly about once a month, and after the Erzulie festival this year Camille had simply refused to humour her mother and play the game anymore. She didn't tell her what the real reason was – that there didn't seem to be any point in going out with other men when she clearly knew she wasn't going to be interested in them, anyway, simply because it was Richard whom she wanted. It was unfair to the men, and it was a waste of everybody's time. Of course, Catherine would not have let her get away with that, so in order to avoid a long lecture from her mother, Camille had just said she needed to live her own life so she could focus on work and her goals there – she definitely wanted no distractions from that – and dates would only bring her confusion and worries, no matter whether they turned out well or not. Catherine wasn't impressed, but she was well aware of Camille's stubbornness – her daughter could be really mulish if you tried to push her into a direction that she didn't want to take. So, for the moment she gave up on her scheme to find Mr Perfect for Camille. She had a suspicion regarding her daughter's lack of interest in new dates, but was wise enough to hold her tongue.
Ah well… And now, Richard was gone. To London – to rainy, cold weather, to the snug in the White Hart, to English TV, to English women, to a slice of his old life and routines - to everything that Saint Marie could not give him. What if he liked it so much that he didn't want to return?
Camille heaved a big sigh, glanced once more into the direction of the dish with the mango she had cut up for Richard's lizard (Harry… of all the names in the world, he came up with Harry! Camille decided that next time she'd have the chance to get a glance of the Royals in the yellow press she'd really have to take a closer look at Prince William's younger brother whom apparently had inspired Richard!), and finally got up. There was no point in sitting around any longer. It was Friday evening, she had other things to do.
