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They tell me that I was found on the porch of the orphanage in the middle of the night. I like to think that it was like Kung Fu Panda 2, where my mother was just trying to save me, so she had to leave me. But my story is more like Lewis in Meet The Robinsons, and I will never find out what really happened.

Orphanages are nothing like the movies. The headmaster, Ms. Oscar, is gentle and sympathetic. She is always trying to be everyone's mother, even if they don't want her to. She is middle aged, plump, but beautiful. She adores kids. She says she always wanted kids, but her husband-and love of her life-was killed before they ever had a chance. She says that she would feel like she was betraying him if she ever got married. So we became her children. The orphanage is simple, and I share a room with several other girls. They aren't brutally mean or annoying. Most of them keep to themselves or stay in a tight clique.

I stick close to Ms. Oscar. She doesn't compare me to others, and I appreciate that more than she could ever know. I am not as smart as Lucille, or as athletic as Mary. I'll never be a beauty queen like Britney. I have passing grades, I can play sports, and I am not hideous, but I'll never be as good as them. Instead, I am Camille, the troublemaker. Bad things happen to me. When it is my night to cook, something always catches on fire. When we go out to the park, someone always gets hurt. Everyone else in the orphanage finds it amusing-until someone gets hurt-but Ms. Oscar just pretends that nothing happens.

"There's something special, pumpkin. There are big things in store for you," Ms. Oscar assured me since I was a little girl. Her eyes twinkled-and still do-as if she knew something. I don't care if she tells everyone else the same thing. It makes me feel special.

There is a boys wing and a girls wing, but I have never ventured into the boys part, unlike most of the other girls. Sixteen is a curious age for us. We are two years away from being able to leave this place, and everyone is itching to explore. I am not. I am comfortable in Ms. Oscar's care. I don't ever want to be eighteen.

"What do you think my mom is like?" I ask Ms. Oscar as I help her with the laundry. While the others play, I work. Ms. Oscar always tries to get me to socialize, but I never do. I almost correct myself and say was like, but I refuse to think that anything bad happened to her.

"I'm sure you are a lot like her," Ms. Oscar says, immediately cheering me up. "Strong willed, but perhaps a bit distant. I hope you aren't as bitter you appear." I am not bitter, just wishful. Every time I go out, I see families. Two parents, kids, a dog, and they are always smiling. I'll never be a part of that.

"Why don't you think anyone ever adopted me?" I ask. I always ask her these questions. I don't take Ms. Oscar's presence for granted. I ask her before it is too late. I ask her while she is still around. She gives me a desperate look, and I know I should drop it. I know what her answer will be. Because bad things always happened when they came and wanted you. I wish that it wasn't the reason, but it is. People get hurt around me. Except Ms. Oscar.

"Sort the clothes," Ms. Oscar asked. She is the only adult who doesn't pity me. She never thinks poor girl who will never have a family. I don't know what she thinks, but I hope it is something like you are here for a reason. "Would you like to go out for dinner tonight?"

"All of us? Isn't that a little expensive?" I know Ms. Oscar has a decent amount of money, but she shouldn't spend it all on us.

"Just you and me, dear," Ms. Oscar answers. There is a tone in her voice that I can't quite decipher. She has never played favoritism, but I don't remember the last time she took someone else for dinner. She has always had this "all of you or none of you" motto. All of us got candy, or none of us did. All of us went to bed, or none of us do. Not one. Not some. But all. I want to ask her why me but I don't think I'm ready for the answer.

That night, Ms. Oscar tells the others that there has been an emergency, and that she has to take me somewhere for a while. This is the first time she has ever lied. At least, I hope it is. I also notice that she says awhile, not for a few hours. How long is awhile?

We take her simple car and she asks me where I want to eat. I choose Panda Express. I am a sucker for Chinese, even if it is fake and Americanized. "How did you sleep last night?" she asks as if it is a trick question.

"Fine," I say, hesitating at first.

"Any bad dreams?"

I shake my head. Not last night. I have a few nightmares, but no more than the average teenager who has been abandoned. Sometimes, the screams and cries of girls' dreams keep me up. We are all haunted by the life that we could have had. I think for a second and say, "There was banging in the attic. It kept me up for a while. I think it was a squirrel."

She gives me a doubtful look. There is something in her eyes that says it wasn't a squirrel. "I'll have to check into that."

"Maybe I was imagining it," I add, even though she might think I'm crazy now. "I could have dreamed it. There was only noise when my eyes were shut. When I opened them, it stopped. It's just me. None of the other girls seemed bothered by it."

"Yes, maybe it was a dream," she says, mostly to herself. We pull into the parking lot. We live smack dab in the middle of New York City. The traffic is awful, but Panda Express is just down the road. I have become comfortable with crowds, as long as I am not in the middle of it.

We order and sit in the corner. I barely have time to take a bite of my steaming food when there is a scream.

"Oh god, I should have taken you straight there," Ms. Oscar murmurs. I open my mouth to ask her what she means, but there is too much chaos. Ms. Oscar is staring at something. I turn and bite back a scream. There is a monster in the middle of the restaurant. I don't believe it at first. But it is there. I see it with my own eyes. I grab Ms. Oscar, telling her that we should go. She doesn't budge.

The monster locks eyes with me. It lunges toward me. I try to jump out of the way, but it grabs me. I squirm and fight, but I am no match. I have no chance. Oh my god, I'm going to die. That was definitely not on the agenda for today.

Ms. Oscar jumps up and pulls out a sword. I am in so much shock, I can barely process what is going on. She swipes at the monster, and it growls at her. It drops me and focuses on Ms. Oscar.

"RUN!" she screams at me. "I'm not going to die just for you to die too!" She just admitted that she is going to die now. I don't want it to happen.

"I can't leave you," I cry out, refusing to believe that Ms. Oscar will die. She is all I have left. Someone grabs my shoulder. I don't have time to see their faces. One of them tosses me over their shoulder and starts to walk out of the restaurant.

"Someone help Alyssa Oscar!" a males voice yells out. It is like a battle cry. But it is too late. I am able to lean up and I see Ms. Oscar fall to the ground. Blood pools around her.

She is dead.

I am alone.

I let out a wild cry, "Let me go! Let me go! I want Ms. Oscar! Don't take me away from her!" I am kicking and sobbing, but it is no use. The person carrying me is too strong and broad for me. Suddenly, exhaustion washes over me and I pass out.