Rick was laying on his back in a medical tent, listening to people prep around him and trying to absorb that he was leaving his unit and going to Germany. His arm was wrapped up to prevent movement but it was still throbbing. He had seen the x-rays after he had tried to argue that he should stay here. It was a little frightening; his bone was twisted sideways and the parts trying to join together. On the surface it didn't seem like a scary thing and it technically wasn't; considering the expulsion his unit had survived, it was a minor injury.
A doctor swarmed into his vision. "You feeling okay?"
"I am actually concerned that I'm not more worried about this" Rick admitted with a grin.
His doctor smiled. "Good man." The doctor patted him on the shoulder. "Just keep in mind, it's not a life threatening injury and I except you to be okay, but don't underestimate it. You have to take proper care of it to make a full recovery so in all your confidence, don't overdo it."
Rick nodded, his smile fading a little. He wished again that Drew was here, looking at his x-rays and explaining this to him, not some random doctor he didn't know.
"You ready? Your transport is here".
Rick snapped back into it and decided to call Drew later when he got a chance. He nodded at the doctor. "Yup. Thank you".
"Don't thank me yet. You'll be back here in a few weeks and you'll hate me for making you stay on desk duty. Have a safe flight."
Rick nodded and closed his eyes as the transport started moving.
The flight was fine. His arm annoyed him, mostly because he couldn't move it or use it. The lopsidedness bothered him and made him grateful he was getting out of him here because leaving here meant the problem was being fixed.
At the hospital, they let him climb into a wheelchair and be wheeled through the entrance of the hospital and into a consolation room. They told him they would find the doctor he was assigned to and they wished him luck with the surgery. He thanked them and waved them out the door, and waited in the middle of the room, pondering his decision for a second. He spun around; actually he spun in a circle before he figured out how to yank the chair with his feet so he didn't just spin in circles all day. He would have just stood up, but he was about to ask a favor so he wanted to in their good graces.
He poked his head out of the room and tried to stop a passing nurse.
"Excuse me."
The nurse stopped and looked at him.
"I'm sorry. I am here waiting for someone to explain to me the surgery for my arm but I was hoping I could make a phone call."
The nurse smiled a little.
"Name?"
"Captain Rick Lincoln."
"It okay if I take you with me to the nurse's station?" The nurse asked.
Rick nodded. The nurse came around and wheeled him toward the rounded desk in the center.
"I'm Cam, by the way."
"Nice to meet you."
"Hold on. I'll grab your file and figure out how much time you have before your doctor gets here."
"Okay" Cam declared a second later. "You have at least thirty minutes; considering all the long distance charges, you can' really talk for that long anyway. Come on."
Cam wheeled him down the hallway and peeked into the rooms they passed.
"What are we looking for?" he asked.
"An empty patient room; they have phones."
"Here. I'll come get you before the consultation. You have to dial 61 then the country code and the area code to get anywhere outside Germany."
"Thanks."
Cam nodded.
Rick took a deep breath and picked up the phone and dialed.
It rang and rang and for a second Rick remembered that he didn't know the time difference between Germany and Texas, so maybe Drew was asleep or working.
It rang one more time and Rick's face broke into a huge grin when he heard Drew' voice.
"Drew Alister".
"Rick Lincoln."
"Rick." Drew's voice definitely picked up and Rick kept grinning and turned away from the door.
"Hold on. Let me get find Jordan. I am actually due for a break about now."
"Jordan." Rick listened to Drew's end of the conversation and was happy with just listening to his voice.
"Man, am I happy to hear from you. What's up?" Drew asked. "Are you okay?"
"I'm okay" Rick said to the worry in Drew's voice. "Well, better now."
"What's wrong?"
Rick signed into the phone and knew he was freaking Drew out so he hurried to explain.
"I was an explosion about two days ago and I'm in Germany. I'm fine. I promise. No permanent damage, but one of my arms is busted and I need surgery. All the doctors in Afghanistan said I can make a full recovery, they just can't handle it there."
"Damn Rick." Drew signed into the phone, sounding rattled. "You sure you're okay?"
"Well," Rick dropped the act a little. "I'd be better if you were here explaining this stuff to me, but all those people seem to know what they are doing."
"I'm sure they do. But now I wish I was there too."
"You want to see my medical records, don't you?" Rick teased lightly, but almost hoping that Drew would take him up on the offer.
"Yea, I want to see them. Think you can get them here?"
"I'll see. I am supposed to meeting with my doctor in Germany in a little bit."
"Do I even want to know what type of explosion it was?" Drew asked after a short pause.
"Probably not, but I'll tell you if you ask" Rick paused, hoping that Drew would say no.
"I want to know, but I don't want to know" Drew admitted.
"Well, it wasn't exactly a great time for me either."
"I really want to see you" Rick admitted, before Drew could respond. "It's starting to feel like forever since I've seen you."
Drew stood up and walked out of the hospital, out into a courtyard.
"I miss you too. I can't wait to see you."
Rick stopped himself from asking Drew to come to Germany and took a deep breath and tried to remember how happy they had been a few minutes ago.
"Well, it's been ten months. We are getting close to the end" Rick said.
"I could come to Germany." Drew said, clearly not hearing what Rick just said.
"No, Drew you have to work. You can't fly to Germany."
"I could. The weekend is coming up here and I could ask for a few days off. The holidays are around the corner. I could trade shifts with a few people and offer to work the holidays. No one ever wants to work holidays."
Rick could feel himself getting excited the possibly seeing Drew in a few days. He wanted to stop Drew before they both got too attached to the idea.
"Drew, seriously, don't give up the holidays. It would take you a day and half to get here and you told me they don't let you take more than a week off so you will spend three days traveling to see for me three days being all loopy from surgery. It's not worth it."
Drew felt a stake of uncertainty, like Rick didn't want to see him. But that was ridiculous; they both missed each other like crazy. Plus, Drew had to take a few of the risks Rick had in the name of this relationship.
"I'm not seeing my relatives this year. If I can't have the holidays with you, why can't I spend holidays working?"
Rick grinned and tried not to flinch at the same time. He was secretly honored Drew said that out loud. Knowing someone cared about you and hearing them make plans to change their whole life to come sit by your bed while you were high on pain meds were very different. Rick was warmed inside that Drew was finally confident enough to speak so plainly.
"Well, they're your holidays; if you are so determined to have no fun, I can't stop you." Rick said with a smile. It seemed that smile would not fade from his face anytime soon.
"Okay. Okay." Rick could almost see Drew standing up and rubbing one hand on his leg while he thought. "I am going to talk to Jordan about it now. You will probably be in surgery by the time I get there, if I get there, so I won't see you until after." Drew paused.
"This timing sucks but I am still coming if I can. You are meeting with your doctor now?" Drew asked.
"Yea, in a few minutes."
"You feel okay about it?" Drew asked.
Rick signed and thought about how to answer that. "Yea, I'm okay. Anything that doesn't make sense, I'll ask. It'll be fine." Rick was convincing Drew but saying it out loud doesn't hurt his confidence.
"Okay. They wouldn't take to you to surgery immediately, probably not. If you have questions ask, and you can call back if you want." Drew's voice was hesitant at the end.
"I would but I'm pretty sure patients don't have regular phone access until they get admitted. One of the nurses let me into an empty room." Rick said, hearing the conversation wrapping up and let himself get excited about the possibility of seeing Drew when he woke up.
"So, I probably wouldn't know if you're coming until I wake up, so hope to see you in a few days?" Rick asked after a second.
"Yea. You know your doctor's name? I'll get in touch with them if I can't come and find out how you are doing and to convince them to let me to talk to you."
Rick laughed a little. "Doctor Thomas Paul".
"Okay, go to your appointment. I'm going to talk to Jordan." Drew sounded excited again.
"Okay." There was a beat of silence.
"Rick, I know you're okay. But I am going to remind you. And even if I don't see you in a couple days, I will see you when you get home and I'm counting down the days until then. You'll be fine."
"I know" Rick signed and forced his emotions back down. "Thanks" he whispered.
"I love you."
Rick grinned and wanted so badly to be standing in front of Drew so he could hug him.
"I love you too." A knock at the door startled him and he looked by to see Cam standing there.
"I have to go."
"Bye." With that, Drew hung up and Rick was in much better spirits than he had been when he got to Germany.
"Were you able to get in touch with them?" Cam asked, coming around to get Rick's wheelchair.
Rick nodded and resisted the urge to start talking about Drew.
"Spend all the hospital's money on long distance calls?"
"No, sir" Rick said with a grin.
"Good. So your appointment starts in five minutes and Doctor Paul will see you. I'm on a rotation with him and I know him. He's a good doctor, so don't worry."
"Noted."
"Here you are. Good luck."
"Hey, Cam. Seriously thank you." Rick held his eyes for a minute.
"You're welcome. I'll probably see you again after surgery."
The meeting went okay. Rick wasn't nervous, not much, but now that he had all the information he wanted to get on with on the surgery and stop giving himself time to get nervous. There were possible complications but Rick felt like he understood them well enough to know he preferred the possibility of those rather than the damage he knew he would have to live with if he didn't have the surgery.
The surgery was scheduled for later that day. Rick refused the chance to have the doctor call anyone for him, now very glad that he had called Drew himself, given that he couldn't very well ask his doctor to make that phone call.
"Do you have any other questions before I hand you over to the prep nurses?" Doctor Paul asked.
Rick thought about it for a second, thinking that maybe he should have a question, but not thinking of any.
"No."
"Okay, I'll see you in surgery."
Rick was left alone the room again for a few seconds, which he spend reliving his conversation with Drew and grinning at his hands, thinking about seeing him. Time would certainly go faster if he was unconscious through most of it.
"Ready?" A new nurse walked into and wheeled him through the doors.
Drew almost jumped in the air, but he remembered that he was in a public courtyard and he had to control himself if he didn't want to answer strangers' questions. He also had to come up with a story to tell Jordan. Or, Drew thought, I could just tell Jordan. I had to tell Krista and that didn't turn out that badly. I trust Jordan. Drew knew most of this bravado was stemming from the fact that he was seeing Rick in a few days and doubt that he could contain his excitement when he started talking to Jordan.
Just to his luck, Jordan walked by as he was entering the ER.
"Hey Drew" Jordan asked.
"Hey Jordan. I have to talk to you." Her face looked a little worried.
"It's okay. I'm okay, I need a favor."
Okay" Jordan monitored him into the locker room.
"I need a few days. Starting the night after next."
Jordan looked shocked. "I'm not saying no, but Drew that's really sudden. Why?"
"I know it's last minute, I'm sorry but something just came up."
"Important enough for you to take off suddenly?"
Drew was starting to get a little panicked that Jordan was going to say no.
"Yea, it's really important. I…" Drew paused. "I'm dating someone, a soldier who got hurt in Afghanistan and…" Drew told a deep breath and forced himself to remember that he trusted the people on the night shift and Jordan was his friend, who had had his back in other situations. Even then panic was curled through his body, but he wanted to stop lying and in the back of his mind, he wanted to embrace the hope that they would still be there for him after they found out. "And he's in Germany and he's having surgery and I want to be there."
Jordan didn't say anything and she just looked at him, her face unreadable. Drew resisted the urge to run from the room and made himself stand still while Jordan processed it.
"He?" she finally said.
Drew nodded.
Jordan reached forward and hugged him. It caught him off guard and it took him a second to respond by wrapping his arms around her.
"Are you okay?" she asked into his shoulder.
"It's not bad. His doctors in country are pretty confidence he will make a full recovery, but it's still surgery and it has been ten months since he left and I want to be there."
Jordan shook him a little and pulled away. "So, you're okay?" Jordan asked.
Drew nodded with a grin on his face and shrugged.
"I'm glad you told me. Thank you for that." Jordan looked him in the eye.
Drew nodded, getting his hopes up.
"So you want time off? You have to find people to cover you."
"Yea" Drew nodded. Jordan looked at him for a second.
"You really like him." She said after a second. Drew rolled his eyes as Jordan's smile grew.
"He's okay." Drew shrugged it off, but he was grinning so much he doubted Jordan brought the act.
"Man I love this. I am totally going to drill you for all the details when you get back" Jordan hugged him again.
"Take until Thursday night and I'll cover you for the last night. It's not like I have anything better to do. That'll give you a chance to do something after his surgery. What is the surgery for if you don't mind me asking?"
"I'm not entirely sure. He said he busted his arm in an explosion and I'm guessing it is a complex break so they have to do a surgerial repair."
Jordan's face took on a sympathetic expression. "Well, call if you need anything. I'm here."
"Jordan" Drew twisted a little, standing there unsure how to express his gratitude. "I can't tell you thankful I am that you…."
"Don't thank me. I'm going to tease you to death while you are working Thanksgiving for me. Um"." For the first time, Jordan hesitated. "I am the only one who knows?"
"And Krista. I'd like to keep it that way at least until we figure out what to do about everyone else".
"I won't tell anyone. It's your decision."
Drew grinned and Jordan grinned back. "Now, go, find your plane tickets and get moving. Can't keep this guy waiting." Jordan kept smiling and hit him on the shoulder. "And if you still want to thank me, bring me some German chocolate."
Drew nodded and held her eyes for another second before he ducked out.
Tickets, bags and shift trades were all acquired in the next three hours. He stopped by and told Krista on the way out. She said wait the half an hour until their shift was over and she would drive him. He agreed and anxiously waited the last thirty minutes of the shift.
Krista teased him ruthlessly about the excitement and teased him about wanting to be to the airport six hours before his flight left. He responded that the next flight wasn't until the next day and he wanted to be here as soon as possible so he had to catch this flight.
"You told Jordan." Krista confirmed for the third time. Drew nodded for the third time. "I can't believe it. I'm proud of you."
"Thank you." Drew said, with a fake bow from where he was sitting. He wasn't sure why he was still attempting to mask the fact that he was so happy, but it was reflex.
Krista stopped in the airport drop off lane and looked at him. "Safe flying. If you have a chance, call us and tell us how the surgery goes. I'll pick you up when you get back if I'm not working. Go. Go." Krista almost shoved him out of the car and didn't even let him say thank you. Drew decided to find some chocolate for her as well.
"Bye."
Rick was now lying on his back in a surgerial unit in Germany, wearing a ridiculous hair net type thing and waiting for his doctor to come back. He was wishing Drew was there and he was getting drowsy from all the drugs they had him on for the surgery and he bit his lip to keep from babbling around Drew to anyone who would listen. Rick really, really hoped his boyfriend was able to get on a plane and was on his way.
Drew was switching flights again, waiting, waiting and hoping Rick was okay. Logically he knew he was probably fine, but Drew really wanted to be there, even just to watch through a window and do absolutely nothing.
Rick's doctor watched his eyes fade close and put his hand out for the scalpel.
Drew tapped his foot across the floor of the last flight he had to be on and glanced at the person to his left who had an annoyed look on their face. "I'm sorry."
Within three minutes, he was apologizing again. "Yea, sorry, this is probably not going to stop."
Rick opened his eyes. His arm didn't hurt, but he felt a little dizzy and spacey, he assumed from all the drugs. He closed his eyes again, not sure how he was supposed to feel; he had never been under general anesthesia before and he had never been pain meds this strong. It was a little shocking, considering his chosen profession but Rick was lucky in a lot of aspects of his life.
Rick glanced around and saw an empty room. He knew that even if Drew was able to come, he never would have made it here this fast. It could have only been about ten or twelve hours according to his rough estimates, so at least he had another day to kill before Drew even had a chance of getting here.
Rick fought off the disappointment from seeing the empty room and closed his eyes again without bothering to look for a call button. He wasn't awake enough to want to talk to nurses yet and considering his arm was neatly immobilized and still attached his body, the details could wait until his head cleared. So he went back to sleep.
The ride to the hospital went about as well as the plane ride, but luckily the car ride was much shorter. At this point, Drew was coming up with a story to tell the hospital that would get him access to Rick without coming out. Even knowing that Rick would probably be okay with it, it wouldn't do him much good, considering he wasn't on Rick's military paperwork or emergency contact list. At this point, Drew realized maybe it was better that Rick would be awake when he got there, so he could let Drew in and share all the results of the surgery.
Rick' doctor had come in to explain that the surgery was successful and his arm would most likely to back to normal within a few months.
"You can do the physical therapy in country and do some of your tour on desk duty. Not the most interesting job, but I know how us military folk didn't like leaving our unit behind. So get so more rest, because the more you sleep the faster you get better."
"Do you know how long I will be here?" Rick asked.
"At least a week; the swelling needs to go down and I want to get you started on physical therapy while you are here so we can fix any complications. Not that I anticipate any, but better safe than sorry."
"Agreed." Rick held out his hand. "At least, this hand still works. Thank you." He said seriously.
"You're welcome." His doctor said with a touch of humor. "It's actually night in your time zone so you should get some sleep, but have the nurses page me if you have questions; I'll be around."
Drew almost ran into the hospital about fifteen hours after Rick got the good news about his arm. He walked into the patients' information desk.
"I am looking for a Captain Rick Lincoln."
The nurse sitting at the front desk won't let Drew back into the room until she checked the emergency lists and contacted Rick to double check that he wanted to see Drew and ensured security cleared him. Drew almost laughed in her face when she said that, but that wasn't polite so he bit his tongue and backed up, smiling at the fact that for the first time in almost a year, he was in the same country as Rick.
"So, you have a Drew Alister, in the waiting room, wanting to see you. You want to see him?" Cam walked into the room.
Rick's was speechless for half a second and he started nodding with a grin. Cam got the message and smiled back as he backed out of the room. "Okay, I'll be right back."
"Drew Alister." Cam walked into the waiting room and found the person who his patient was so happy to see. A man shot up and walked over to him. "I'm Cam. I'm one of Captain Lincoln's nurses. He wants to see you so I cleared with it the desk; it was made a lot easier because you are military yourself. Come on back, I'll walk you."
"Is he okay?" Drew asked, suddenly nervous even though twenty seconds ago he was sure Rick was fine.
"Yea, Captain Lincoln came through the surgery successfully and he has been stable the whole time. His doctor talked to him earlier so he can fill you in on the rest of it later. Last door on the left."
Drew walked forward, almost forgetting to say good bye to Cam.
He turned and walked backwards for a second and smiled at Cam. "Thank you."
Cam nodded.
Drew turned again and faced the door. It had a glass window and Drew took a step to the left so he could Rick. Happiness lit in his chest at just seeing Rick, who appeared to be asleep and attached to an IV but fine other than the cast on his arm. Drew grinned, bigger than the grin he had had while on the phone and shoved the door open with perhaps a bit more vigor than necessary.
Rick shifted when he heard the door bang and he pried his eyes open rather quickly when he heard Drew talking to him.
"So what, I fly for a whole day and when I finally get here, you are sleeping; incredibly rude and if this ever happens again I expect you to be awake." Drew said, loving that Rick's eyes popped open at the sound of his voice and his still recovering boyfriend shoved himself up to throw his arms around Drew.
They were both grinning like idiots and as soon as Drew stopped talking, Rick leaned forward and grabbed him in a tight hug. Drew laughed and kept Rick from falling over when he tilted sideways.
"You are on a million drugs, you can't go jumping on people; you'll fall over."
"Well, you see I have this handsome, smart, loyal boyfriend who flew halfway across the world to see me and I figured he would catch me." Rick had his head in Drew's shoulder and the sound of his voice without static and clicks made Drew wanted jump up and down.
Drew felt his face flush instead and he turned his face into Rick's shoulder to try and hide it. Unfortunately this was one of the people who knew him best out of everyone on the planet and Drew had zero chance of hiding his reaction from Rick. They held on to each other and the euphoric started to wear off and they were happy on a deeper, more significant level. Drew sighed and Rick nudged his chin into Drew's shoulder and Drew for one only stayed dry eyed because he had years of practice hiding his emotions.
"I missed you like crazy."
"Me too."
"It's embarrassing how happy I am to see you."
"Well, good thing I'm the only one around." Arms tightened around Drew's back and Rick continued. "And I feel the same way."
That got a laugh from Drew but they could both hear the emotion there.
"Hey," Rick said, pulling away and putting his forehead against Drew's. "I am the one on insane narcotics. You have to keep it together."
"Oh, what are you going to do about it?" Drew asked, not actually crying like Rick accused.
"I'm pretty sure I have the next three days…" Rick paused and looked at Drew for confirmation, "to think of something."
"Yea. Jordan offered to cover my shift on Thursday night, so my return flight is then."
"I think" Rick leaned in again, not able to find the words to properly express how elated that fact made him "I am going to kiss you now."
Drew shrugged his shoulders without concern for what anyone might think. "Okay".
And they did just that.
"So, that just happened." Rick paused. "What changed since I saw you the last time?" They were now lying next to each other, with Rick's uninjured arm behind Drew's head.
"Well you see, I met this guy and I couldn't stop thinking about him and then one thing lead to another and there you have it." Drew concluded their tumultuous relationship in one sentence but he hit on all the important parts.
"Drew." The bang on his head was accompanied with a laugh and Drew knew Rick was genuinely curious under all the flirting.
"You know my friend Krista…" Drew waited for Rick to nod.
"She liked me and one day we were talking after this case, and she tried to…" Drew paused.
"Tried to kiss you, right?" Rick started thinking aloud after Drew stayed quiet for a few seconds longer than is the convention. "And you didn't freak out?"
"I freaked out only a little. And I wasn't into it; I think I was so shocked I just sat there and she got the hint really fast."
"Much more interesting than how my first girlfriend found out." Rick commented dryly but continued in a much sincere tone. "You know I trust you. You didn't do it on purpose."
"You just told your first and only girlfriend." Drew shot back, absorbing what Rick had said. After the months of half worrying about it, the reassurance was soothing. "And she completely understood. You would have to work to get much more boring than that."
"You are stuck on the only part of that story. And I didn't say I set the bar very high." Rick defended. "Then what happened?"
"Long story that is much more dramatic when Krista tells it so I'll let her. That actually leads to my conversation with Jordan." Drew kept talking at Rick's curious face.
"When I asked for a week off at the last minute, she asked me what was wrong and I had just gotten of the phone with you and I was feeling confident and I had finally come around to the idea of Krista knowing and being comfortable with that. So I was thinking about you without talking about you and Jordan had this look on her face, all sympathetic like…"
"And you told her. You actually come out to someone who isn't your parents or who found out accidentally." Rick looked shocked and thrilled.
Drew nodded.
"I am…" Rick shook his head, now actually speechless. Drew smiled at the look on his boyfriend's face, seeing pride there and Drew knew he had made the right decision.
"Yea, well, what can I say? I guess I finally got over hiding and…" Drew looked down in embarrassment. "I was kinda of completely excited to see you and I couldn't really contain myself."
Rick had to laugh at that, mostly because Drew had turned a shade of red he had only seen on the outside of crayon boxes.
"Well…" Rick said, shifting towards Drew even more. "I'm flattered."
Drew let out a nervous breathy laugh and turned towards Rick too.
"You take the cake with interesting story." Rick grumbled, kissing the side of Drew's face.
"That was hardly the interesting part."
"Fine" Rick conceded. "But you get points for bravery."
"One day, I am going to collect on all these so called points." Drew threatened.
"Wait until my arm heals." Drew almost snorted in shock, but wasn't unhappy with the idea.
Once he stopped laughing hysterically, Drew looked Rick in the eyes. "I'm pretty sure you are the brave one." He paused so the message got across. "Even if you drive me a little insane"
"In good way?"
"Sure, if that's what you want to tell yourself."
"And yet you continue to stick around. Like a barnacle." Rick teased.
"Well" Drew said smugly. "Maybe I stuck around in spite of the chaos."
"No, I'm almost positive you secretly love it." Rick sounded convinced of his position.
"You are so full of yourself."
"Only when I'm right. And this time I am."
"Or you just wouldn't admit that you're wrong." Drew teased Rick. It wasn't actually true, but it was fun to see what Rick could come up with in response.
"Or you just won't admit it when you're wrong."
"Lame." Drew declared. "No points for you."
"Luckily, I know someone who is willing to share." Rick said suggestively, leaning in a little.
Drew was incredibly attracted to Rick and had been for closing on eight years. In fact, this whole situation would be probably a lot more fun minus the clothes. But he was the voice of reason for good cause.
"Rick. Hospital."
Rick groaned and turned away dramatically. "Buzz kill."
"I have two words for you my friend. Angry nurses."
"Pretty sure the person you're dating is not your friend." Rick ignored the other part of Drew's statement.
"I'm serious. Give Molly and Kenny guns and they could be army."
"Fine." Rick rolled back towards Drew. "But we are not done with this conversation."
"I'm glad." Drew grinned at Rick's mock serious face which broke after around ten seconds of staring.
Rick smiled softly and dropped the serious look, taking in the fact that they were both in the same country and Drew was resting on his shoulder and he liked the weight of that much more than the weight of the gun that been there last week.
"Anything else influence this decision?"
"What, insane excitement to see you just isn't enough?"
"You know what I mean." Rick said in a quiet tone, an all knowing tone that Drew had never heard him use with anyone else.
Drew looked down for a second, but he didn't actually want to stop looking at Rick so he met his boyfriend's eyes. "I made friends I can trust. Who aren't military. Krista just didn't care. About any of it. She found out and she treated me exactly the same." Rick half hugged him with the arm that was around Drew's shoulders. "It's incredible and I realized maybe there are more people out there like her, maybe I never gave them a chance because I was focused on being scared or I was convinced everyone would react the way my parents did. And I know you had this experience with some other people, but do you remember how amazing it feels to not have to pretend? I never realized how stressful it was keeping my mouth shut around other people until I wasn't doing around Krista. I just want to feel that way all the time, and not waste so much brain power trying to remember which role I am allowed to play around which people."
Rick took a second to process what his boyfriend was saying and honestly to get his emotions under control because some of that statement was heartbreaking and rest of it was wildly brave. It surprised but didn't really surprise Rick that Drew had matured and grown up so much in the last year; it made him overjoyed either way. Rick could feel their relationship shifting again, this time for the better.
"Here I was" Rick started, pulling his injured arm toward him and holding it against his chest so he could roll towards Drew and see his face "spending all this time trying to convince you of those exact things and you go and discover it all on your own. I'm proud of you."
Drew flushed that endearing red again and when he met Rick's eyes, he looked bashful but also free and light hearted.
"Well I never could have done it without you. If I hadn't met you, I would still being half dating girls I didn't like and convincing myself it was fine."
"I am going to take full credit for that." Rick said smugly. Drew nodded. "But seriously Drew, you would have come into your own either way. Frankly, I'm impressed at how much you figured out in the last year."
"And you mean that as a compliment, right?" Drew said, some of the insecurity returning to his eyes. "And not as a dig at the length of this process?"
Rick put his forehead back against Drew's. "I mean that as a compliment and not as a dig. We're not going anywhere so it doesn't matter how long it takes you."
Drew just stared into Rick's eyes and he could see the vulnerability left over being scared and unsure. For years, Rick had seen a hint of fear in Drew's eyes, accompanying the rest. It was finally starting to fade now and the confidence growing in its place suited Drew much better.
"Confidence is a good look on you." Rick whispered after a while.
"I like it on you too." Drew whispered back.
As per usual, Drew broke the moment first, but he had stayed longer than he would have a year ago, so Rick could appreciate the progress and remember to read the love in Drew's way of speaking.
"I would have come out with I was like forty and no one would have dated me because I'd have twenty dogs."
"I thought we discussed this. I am not training more than three dogs a time." Rick said, closing his eyes and setting his face on Drew' shoulder, more content and relaxed than he had been since the last time he saw Drew.
He could feel Drew reposition himself so they were breathing on each other and Rick couldn't help but grin again. It was possible Rick had smiled more in the last three days than in the month prior.
"I was thinking about it on the flight over. That conversation we had about changing emergency contacts, we actually need to finish that process. If you are deployed, you might not be able to do much, but I want someone to tell you. Like this time, if it had been worse and you hadn't been able to call me, it might have taken weeks for me to hear about it, because we don't exist anywhere official Or unofficial." Drew paused and looked in Rick's eyes to see they were increasing becoming more serious. "And I'm done with that. If something happens to either of us, the other one has to know or someone has to know to tell us."
Rick nodded, but considered the statement for a second before answering. "And we list the relation as…?"
"We leave it blank?" Drew asked. "I couldn't think of something that wasn't a lie or stupid sounding."
"I think we can leave it blank; that's not lying." Rick said, moving on to other things in his head. "I don't want you making a decision because you're scared."
Rick might have gone on but Drew was shaking his head.
"I'm not. We have both extremely lucky, especially given the number of tours we're racking up. I want to know if something happens to you and for you to know if something happens to me." If possible Drew moved closer to Rick and peered in his eyes more deeply. "I love you and I would need to know." Drew smiled a weak smile and swallowed. "Although if you dare get hurt any worse than this, I might have to finish you off myself. Just because it's there does not mean you should be tempted to use it." Drew finished, sternly pointing Rick in the shoulder.
At that statement, Rick filled with intense admiration and adoration for Drew. He ducked his head off Drew's shoulder and put his head in his chest to try the emotion he felt at Drew's speech. However, if anyone other than Drew asked him, it was the pain meds.
"Hey" Drew said gently, squirting down to meet his eyes again, pulling his chin out a little. "I hope it doesn't happen, but I don't think I could take not knowing." With that Drew kissed his face.
"It is the pain meds." Rick said jokingly, but he was looking Drew straight in the eyes, conveying how much that sentiment meant to him and how much he loved Drew for saying it.
"Right, okay" Drew let him have his excuse.
"Let's just stay here a second." Rick whispered eventually when Drew set his head back on the bed next to Rick's.
"We've got three days." And that statement produced a sense of reassure in Rick that pushed the rest of the emotion to the back of his eyes.
Time passed and neither Rick nor Drew could have told someone how much, but eventually Drew's eyes drifted from Rick's face and onto the awkward position Rick was holding his injured arm.
"Hey" Drew whispered. "You have to stay on your back so you don't hurt your arm." Rick didn't pull away from Drew and while Drew didn't mind that, he knew that Rick's arm should really be flat on a pillow especially considering the surgery had just happened yesterday.
"Come on" Drew whispered, pushing Rick's shoulder carefully enough so as not to jar his arm anymore. "I don't want your surgeon to come and yell at me."
Rick made a annoyed humming noise as he rolled away, but Drew pulled himself back next to Rick and put his head on his boyfriend's chest once he had lifted himself up to help Rick reposition his arm.
"So you want to tell me what the doctor said about your arm?" Drew asked, feeling Rick's heartbeat though the hospital gown.
"They actually found two fractures, a higher greenstick one and below that a long oblique fracture."
Drew thought quietly for a second. "And they said you will get all the function back?"
"Yea, with physical therapy. Doctor Paul said I'll stay here for at least a week to get started on that, though the bones will not be very healed in that time so I'm not sure what we'll be doing. After that I go back to Afghanistan and desk duty and PT with the doctors there."
"This job never ends, huh?" Drew grumbled, not happy about Rick going back with a badly broken arm, but knowing he could still be useful and the army needed that.
"Yea, my tour is only two-thirds over and it's not like I could lie around here for eight weeks while my unit doesn't have a commanding officer."
"Yea, I should have seen that one coming, but it doesn't mean I have to be happy about it."
They laid there some more, Drew trying to force his thoughts away from Rick being injured in combat and Rick was soaking in the feeling of Drew's head moving on his chest every time he took a breath.
"Want to talk about it?" Drew eventually asked.
Rick signed, indicating his reluctance but Drew's head was already filled with these types of images and Drew had asked because he knew telling other people helped Rick process.
"Last night was okay, because I am still so drugged and the next week will probably be fine if you stay here, but after that…" Rick paused.
"So tell me what happened." Drew suggested lightly, putting his hand on Rick's chest next to his own head. If one of Rick's arms hadn't been injured and the other one wasn't trapped under Drew, Rick would have taken his hand.
"How else does it happen? We were doing patrols on this road outside Kabul and half my unit was there and half of Captain Rojas' unit was there and everything was quiet until it wasn't. The truck in front of us rolled over an IED and exploded. I'm not sure what happened to any of the people in there, because the driver of my truck stopped when it happened. But that just set off the IED we were on top and I flew out of the truck. I'm not sure when my arm got broken; I just remembered hitting the ground, thinking I was on fire because it hurt that much." Rick paused and let the images wash over him so he got used to them and they stopped startling him whenever they flashed into his mind. Distinctly he felt Drew starting to rub circles on his chest and Rick started to relax a little.
"I don't know my arm was broken until they hauled my unit to the med tent. A few of my guys were scrapped up and one of them had a concussion but they all stayed in country to recover. I was the worse of my guys and even I'm not that bad. It is fucking miracle we all made it out of there with as little damage as we did."
Drew bit his lip and refused to start sobbing all over Rick. As soon as the emotion dropped down to the point where Drew could form a coherent response, Rick had gone quiet; Drew wanted him to talk about it, not run it over and over again in his head.
"You have good days and bad days and truly horrible days. Hopefully you have enough good days to survive the other two. You know that; just be grateful."
"I do know that and I have had so many good days in a row, the bad ones sometimes catch me by surprise and remind me how fast everything goes to hell."
Yea, Drew thought, knowing that feeling from both the hospital and combat.
"Well, this time the good didn't turn too bad."
"Doesn't the law of large numbers suggest that one of these days my luck'll run out?"
Drew jabbed Rick with the hand that was on his chest. "Don't say that. I didn't do all this work just to have you dying on me." Drew's voice sounded choked up and Rick shoved that set of doubts to the back of his head.
"Sorry" Rick said softly.
"Hey" Drew said sitting up and deliberately changing the topic. "Krista asked me to call when we knew how the surgery went." Drew paused. "And Jordan asked for chocolate so at some point, I'll have to go find some."
"Why don't I get chocolate? I have been for two days and no chocolate in sight; I feel ripped off."
"I don't think chocolate just magically appears from thin air when you cross the border. Tomorrow I'll go find some."
"And apples." Rick insisted.
"Right, I know because the army's taste like styrofoam." Drew finished, familiar with that complaint.
"Perfect, you have got it figured out, you can stay."
"Jerk" Drew said, punching Rick lightly on his good arm before getting up to find his phone in the bag he had dropped on the floor earlier.
"You know, I'm surprised no one has come in to check on you." Drew said, remembering the complaint about frequent interruptions from his hospital.
"I could be wrong but I think it is really early in the morning and maybe the nurses have to sleep."
"Huh, yea, it's like midnight local time. Guess fighting about chocolate took longer than I thought."
"We were not fighting about chocolate for that long. Most of the time was taken up by you showing off how awesome you are."
Drew grinned and glanced at Rick's eyes, before he dialed Krista.
"Her shift is starting in about an hour so Krista should be awake."
"I do get to talk to this mystery person who gave you so much confidence?" Rick asked.
Drew looked at his boyfriend with a sincere expression. "Of course, she would probably love to put a voice to the name."
"Exactly how much time have you spend talking about me?" Rick wondered out as Drew said hello to the person who was presumptively Krista.
Rick pushed himself to a sitting position and pulled the pillow into his lap so his arm could keep resting on it.
Even from a distance, Rick could hear Krista ask about him.
"So how is Rick?"
They both grinned at the question but for different reasons, Rick because his name rolled off Krista's tongue easily so she must have heard about him at least a couple times and Drew because Krista knew the important stuff.
"He's good; they fixed his arm and with a little PT, it'll heal completely."
"Awesome; tell him I'm glad he's okay and to use that newly fixed arm to find me some good chocolate."
"Tell him yourself" Drew said and held out the phone to Rick.
Rick took the phone with a little surprise and held it up to his ear.
"Yea, I doubt my doctors will okay that outing immediately, but lucky for both of us, we have Drew to make chocolate runs" he said with a laugh, clearly shocking the woman on the other end of the phone.
"Oh, I'm sorry, I was messing with Drew. I didn't mean that you actually had to find chocolate. You are recovering…"
"Krista" Rick said to her rambling, liking her instantly. "I was joking, it's fine and I will join in anytime you feel like messing with Drew."
"Geez, thanks for the support there" Drew said sarcastically.
Rick tilted his head to flash Drew a smile while he kept listening to Krista.
"I'm so glad to sorta of meet you" she was saying. "Drew talks about you, but he won't tell me all the details, so this conservation might take awhile, especially now that you can't escape."
"You know I could just hang up the phone" Rick teased with no intention of actually doing that.
"Yea, no. One of the things I do know about you is that your parents raised you to have manners so I think I would have to really annoying for either one of you to hang up on me."
"And you plan to take full advantage of that fact?" Rick asked.
"Of course" Krista exclaimed. "Can't let a chance like this past me by."
"Okay Krista" Drew said, taking the phone from Rick's hand and putting it on speaker on his leg. "Ask away."
"This can't get too long; she has to work in an hour" Drew whispered to Rick.
"I heard that. Rest assured if I think of more questions, I can just call on my break."
"Determined" Rick commented.
"Well, yea. It is nice to finally meet my fake boyfriend's real boyfriend."
Rick let out a shocked laugh and looked at Drew as Drew repeated his earlier statement. "Told you it was more dramatic when she told it."
"Oh, put a sock in it, Drew. I'll explain."
"Yea, I for one would like to hear the story behind that one" Rick commented.
"So, Drew told you how I found out about you?" Krista confirmed.
"Yea".
"Well" Krista explained. "Later that month, Molly, the head nurse here, convinced herself that Drew needed a girlfriend and was trying consistently to set him up with her niece. One night she called her niece and planned to just hand the phone to Drew and hurry up the whole situation. While this is going down, Ray from x-ray is following me around, trying to get me to go out with him. I don't want to go with him, he perfectly nice, but I don't want to go out with him. I walked up to the nurse's station just as Molly is getting to Drew and I wanted to fix both these problems so I kissed Drew in front of the whole ER." Krista sounded proud of herself.
"You did not tell me that part." Rick said, looking at Drew.
"I was getting there?" Drew asked hesitantly.
"Don't worry Rick. He still wasn't into it and as soon as we were out of earshot, he told me I'm never allowed to it again. Anyway, Molly gets off his back, but not without calling him a pig first, which don't worry I glared at her for that one. Ray gets off my back and stops asking me out but he puts in a little nice comment about how Drew is much too good for me. Really, the whole thing was a lot of fun." Krista finishes brightly.
"Wow." Rick was sure he had an expression of disbelief on his face. "Somehow I imagined this story with a lot fewer insults for the two of you."
"Well, whatever, people can think what they want. We were the talk of the ER for like 20 minutes until the gossip train rolled in again." The not worrying about the convention was reading loud and clear in Krista's statement and Rick was a little shocked that Drew liked that about her and didn't find it off putting.
"Wait, this is the same Molly who gets upset with people for having sex in hospitals?" Rick blurt out suddenly.
"How did that come up in casual conversation?" Krista asked, sounding like she was ready to gossip now.
"It wasn't exactly casual conversation." Rick answered without giving Drew a chance.
They listened as Drew groaned. "You both are trying to kill me."
"Don't worry Drew. We do it out of love." Krista reassured him.
"That makes zero sense." Drew said, pulling his head out his hands to stare at the phone in confusion.
"Learn to live with the absurd Drew. Makes life much more fun." Krista advised.
"And it compliments the impulsiveness much better than rules." Rick joined in. He, for one, liked Krista's sense of humor.
"You two could go on the road."
"Only if you come." Rick answered.
"Man, I can't wait to meet you in person, Rick. When are you coming home again?"
"About four months" he answered. "And I don't really mind that Drew has someone to talk to about this stuff until then."
"Well, I'm your girl." Krista said. "Now onto the interesting stuff. Tell me how you two meet. I have only heard Drew's side of the story and he insisted it is not interesting of a story."
"We meet in boot camp" Rick said.
"Okay" Krista said at length, sounding like she intentionally trying to maintain her patience with them. "I am going to need more that. Where were you? What were you doing? Was it love at first sight? What were you wearing?"
"What were we wearing?" Drew asked. "Who cares?"
"I care" Krista practically screamed into the phone.
"Our uniforms" Rick answered, not seeing why it mattered but finding Krista hilarious and wanting to humor her. "Everyone in boot camp pretty wears the same uniform 24/7 so that one isn't exactly a shocker."
"What were we wearing? I swear Krista" Drew said, shaking his head.
"Shut it Drew or you are taking a cab back from the airport. Can't you tell Rick and I are trying to have a conversation here?"
Rick looked at Drew. "I like her."
Drew rolled his eyes for the third time. "Of course you do." He muttered at the same time Krista said "I told you Drew, now keep the peanut gallery compliments to a minimum."
"Yes, ma'am" Drew answered, with mock seriousness. "By all means, please carry on with the interrogation."
"Oh, buddy you ain't seen nothing yet." Krista promised.
Rick laughed at the exchange, thinking she could join the army alongside Kenny and Molly. "What else do you want to know?" Rick asked.
"Finally, someone who gets me. Who asked who out?"
Drew had his head in his hands again and he was shaking it back and forth.
"Neither one of us technically. We didn't actually date. We were friends and then we were more than friends, but its not like there were movie theaters or any of that normal stuff for us to do so, so the first time we went on something that could be considered a date was actually when I stayed for Drew for a while after my first tour."
"You two lived together before you went on a proper date?" Krista sounded surprised and fake horrified.
"Yup" Rick said matter a factly.
"Such rebels, the both of you."
"Well him anyway" Drew broke in.
"I wasn't exactly dragging you along kicking and screaming." Rick defended immediately.
"So that means you have been together, how long again?" Krista interrupted them.
"Since the summer between my sophomore and junior year of undergrad, so almost eight years" Drew answered.
"Wow" Krista said. "And in all that time, no one figured it out?"
"Nope."
"You ever get caught?"
"Nope." Rick said. Now that he was thinking about it, it sounded unreasonable to him too.
"You two are boring. Adorable but boring."
"Says the woman who is interrogating us about our life!" Drew pointed out.
"So how'd you manage it?"
"Well, it helped that one or both of us was deployed…" Rick stopped to consider it. "Four of those eight years and three of the years, we've been stationed in different states."
"Wow" Krista said, the excitement dropping from her voice. "That sounds hard."
Rick and Drew looked at each other and together decided to play it off the sake of the tone of the conversation.
"We're both military, you get used to it."
"Now I know why Drew decided to go to Germany for a surgery that you clearly came through just fine."
"Yea" Drew admitted. "That was less about me being worried and more about an excuse to see you" he finished, looking at Rick.
"Seriously stop, you guys are going to give me diabetes." Krista demanded. "And Rick" Krista' voice broke the gaze they had been holding. "Yea" he answered.
"That is not a good excuse to get hurt. Come on, keep it together."
"You sound like Drew" Rick teased.
"Well, good maybe the message will get through."
Rick looked at the phone was an insulted expression on his face.
"What makes you think I need to be told the same thing three times to get it through my head? You have never even met me" Rick defended himself.
"Just making sure. I'm invested now."
"Understatement of the year" Rick said.
"And I did drop Drew off the airport and save him from Molly's niece so I am pretty sure that means you two own me breakfast and you have to be alive for me to collect."
"When did I agree to that?" Drew asked.
"I think you just want free food from the deal" Rick analyzed. It was Krista's turn to fake be insulted and Drew laugh out loud.
"I knew you two would get along" Drew commented, shifting and leaning back against the bed.
"Yea, let's not get into the reason your best friend and your boyfriend have the same abrasive humor."
"Well, neither one of you are anything like my parents so at least I dodged that cliché" Drew murmured, closing his eyes.
"Drew" Krista demanded from the phone. "Are you falling asleep on us?"
Rick was a little surprised Krista could tell that from one sentence and he realized that Krista and Drew had spent enough time together to really know each other. If Rick wasn't so confident in his and Drew's relationship, he might be tempted to be jealous.
"Hey" Drew defended himself with his eyes still closed. "I have been awake for two days. Sleeping at 60,000 feet doesn't count as sleep." Drew rolled over. "If anyone gets their hair in a twist about me sleeping in your hospital bed, either ignore them or wake me up." He directed Rick.
"Okay" Rick said, knowing that he wouldn't wake Drew up unless someone insisted and that wouldn't be for at least five more hours.
"Night Drew." Krista said from the phone. Drew didn't answer. "He picked that praise up from me." Krista informed Rick proudly.
Rick took a second to observe how calm Drew looked and almost wanted to curl up next to his boyfriend but he was still on the phone with Krista.
He yawned and took the phone off speaker and moved the pillow back to his left so Drew could have more room.
"Why I am not surprised" he said, sliding down a little "What else do you want to know?"
Krista asked question after question for another twenty minutes and some of his answers made them laugh so much Rick was worried about waking Drew up. At one point, Drew frowned and rolled over and Rick could hear Krista giggling into the phone when he told her that.
"So, Krista what do you do? You work at the hospital too right?"
"Yea, I'm a second year surgical resident. I'm a couple years younger than Drew."
"What do you look like?"
Krista described herself. "If you're curious there is a photo of a bunch of us at a birthday party on Drew's phone. I am the one wearing the three birthday hats."
Rick laughed and pulled the phone away from his ear. It took him a second to find the photos app and Rick found a bunch shots of people in scrubs so Rick assumed they were Drew's coworkers.
He located a photo of about six people all wearing huge grins and holding cake.
"You look like an alien" Rick told her, putting the phone back next to his ear.
"Thank you. That is exactly the look I was going for" Krista exclaimed but it sounded different from her previous joking.
"Really?" he asked.
"No" She almost screamed. Rick glanced at Drew, but he was still asleep.
They talked a bit more about Krista's career and a little about his career and she needed no clarification.
"You have been hanging out around Drew too long if you picked up on all that."
"Well, Drew is a good teacher. You should see him with the other residents." That comment to lead to stories about the other people they worked with and the story of Drew teaching Paul how to put in IVs.
"What's your degree in?" Krista asked.
"Farsi and foreign language."
"Did you always want to in the military?"
"Since I was about sixteen."
"Where'd you go to college?"
"In California. My mom and I moved there after my parents got divorced."
"Does that mean you were out in college?" Krista asked.
"I had friends who knew but I didn't tell the whole world."
"Did you have a boyfriend before Drew?"
"Yes."
"Did you have a girlfriend before that?"
"You are not shy are you?" Rick asked rhetorically. "Yea, in high school."
"Did Drew?"
"I am going to let him answer that." Rick was impulsive but he wasn't a complete jerk.
"Are you two going to get married?" Krista's questions caught him off guard but he wasn't sure why. She really was no holds bar. In answer to her question, he had thought about it and he would be lying if he didn't say he hoped Drew had thought about it. But then again the same conflicts they had had for years still existed and Rick didn't see them overcoming those, despite Drew's newfound confidence.
Rick looked at a sleeping Drew and imagined one of them quitting their job so they could have this every night. At that moment, he thought he could be convinced to do that.
"I don't know. Maybe." Rick said softly, reaching out to touch Drew's face. After a second, he redirected and asked her significant others. "Or lack thereof" Krista corrected him.
Krista talked for awhile more and Rick let his mind drift, trying to imagine a situation where in they could actually be married. He reached out again and started toying with the longer bits of Drew's hair. The touch woke Drew up a little and Rick heard him murmur under his breath.
"What are you two talking about now?"
"Weddings and Krista's real boyfriends." Rick told him jokingly, but he was interested in Drew's reaction.
"Oh" Drew never opened his eyes and his face didn't look panicked. He pushed his head against Rick's hand and appeared to go back to sleep. "Cool."
That response only made Rick all the more curious to have this discussion with Drew when one he wasn't exhausted and two when Rick himself wasn't high on pain meds. Which meant, Rick thought with a sign, it would have to wait until he got home.
"Drew still asleep?" Krista' question startled him out of his thoughts.
"Um, yea."
"I'm at the hospital so I have to go. Thanks for answering all my questions; this was fun."
"You're welcome. It was."
"Jordan is the other person here so knows where Drew is and why. Would it be okay if I tell her what going on?" Krista asked.
"Go ahead" Rick gave her permission.
"I still can't wait to see you. Hope the rest of your deployment is safe. Bye Rick.
"Thanks. Bye Krista." With that they both hung up and Rick set the phone on the table across the foot of his bed and slid down so he was level with Drew's head. Now that he was lying down, he was exhausted and he leaned his forehead against Drew's, took a deep breath and fell asleep.
