My hands grasp at the cold cobbles of the courtyard floor, while tears trickle down my face, splashing with a newfound hate to the stones below. My hair blew about my crimson painted cheeks in the wind, and my lips were charred and scratched – bitten to pieces due to my nervous habits. My armour which I had worn as part of my disguise was cast aside in the dirt; scratched and dirtied out of any recognizable shape or form. I was dressed in nothing but a thin top and shorts, and the bitter, chilly wind which the mellow setting sun had left behind bit at my bare, pale shoulders and legs with venom, whipping about my hair and causing it to fly about my face, stabbing into my eyes and causing me to blink rapidly. I had no energy.
I would like to think that I was expressionless. Emotionless. But that was just a hope in heaven – my eyes were half filled with tears threatening to drop; my bottom lip wobbling in the same way which a baby's would if it had been scolded, I'm sure I was now far away from 'a sight for sore eyes.' I knew that I'd done wrong – and I knew that even now there was no pity for me; the dark, cold, cruel and unforgiving eyes of Lord Sun Quan glared through me, just gazing at my worn out form unbelievingly. It was as if he didn't know me anymore.
He'd changed from the young boy who had rescued me on the day of the monstrous attack of our village – he'd grown up, and now realised that even if you love someone, they're the best people to let go of.
I think back to how it all started- why I'm here, on my 'deathbed' if you like…
Eyelash Wishes
Chapter 1
"Ha! Ming looks like a boy with her hair up!"
It was the same everyday. The same high pitched, patronizing voice, which sent chills of anger through my core. Yes, the same three girls, teasing, annoying, and winding me up to the brink of insanity, until I could no longer resist the evil temptation of wanting to throw the brutes across the room.
Everyday.
I yanked my hair out of Ren's grip, and curtly wound it round to a twist with my hands, brushing it back down over my shoulder. The young Ren, at least five years younger than myself, gave a scowl which could make even Dong Zhuo shudder, and settled herself back daintily on the grass.
Ren was my sister, a slim, beautiful young girl who was everything I wasn't. Her hair was perfect black ebony, her eyes two perfect limpid blue pools, along with glowing rosy cheeks and full lips. Yes, everything about her was perfect – I wouldn't be wrong if I said she was the epitome of absolute perfection. Despite my constant accusations of her attitude and pranks, she was always the pearl which sat amongst the family line. Always getting her own way, and always finding a way to make sure others got the least, her favourite pastime was winding her 'responsible' older sister up. AKA, myself.
And yes, maybe I did look a bit too much like a boy. My face was long, and my lips were a taut line; unattractive and stubborn, according to my mother, who had much preference in Ren over me. I didn't have the best body – I was slim, but had no real shape. My older sister had always told me that soon, my curves would set in and my body would shape out into that of a woman. Soon? My sister had left our village months ago. No, years.
There was one thing I loved about myself – a small entity about my features which gave me but an ounce of pleasure – my eyes. Apparently you could get lost in them and not notice the time go by, according to a childhood sweetheart who I'd had a small relationship with in my younger years. He might have just been being complimentary, or it might be true. But I think they're mysterious; grey and clouded over, holding a hidden secret.
Woah, maybe that's too extreme.
Of course, my sister had this knack of making you believe her taunts – and despite the many times I'd spent hours gazing in the mirror, trying to fake a lady-like pout or flutter my long lashes, with my hair up you could easily mistake me for a boy. Of course it was fine down; trailing over my shoulders in all it's wavy messiness, being the dark brown colour that it is, I looked perfectly… normal.
Ren turned to her two friends who sat beside me on the grass.
"What do you wanna do today?" She said tartly, flicking her head round with such force that her hair swept about her shoulders gloriously.
The two other girls gave each other looks. Lin, the youngest, small and dainty with a cute little face gave Ren a beautiful smile. "I don't know," she answered, in a voice which could have melted butter, "maybe we could wind up Fa…"
"That's boring. We did that yesterday, and he's too old and deaf to notice us," Ren's second crony piped up. Shang was bodyguard/posh friend number two, a large girl, but still managing to be utterly gorgeous. She was less of a prime village teen queen, and much nicer than any of the other girls who had the misfortune to be part of Ren's group. I don't know how she ever got dragged into the antics of the young wannabes, but albeit her happiness for being part of the 'crew', she had issues, alike the others.
Fa was an elder of the village, one of the wisest and most accomplished men I knew. He'd become deafened by the bedlam of war, and blinded by the delirium. Having been forgotten by most everyone in the village, he'd been reduced to wandering aimlessly around the village and tottering about the fields, muttering incoherent ramblings to the only people that would listen. He was once a legend, but the wars of the past had torn him apart.
"Goodness Lin, keep up." Ren patronized, swiping a hand at the air to view the shiny clean nails which were rooted into her fingers. With an unappreciative frown, she gazed back at Shang.
"Any bright ideas?"
While they discussed their new plans for devising havoc and mishap in the small village where we lived, I studied my own nails. Browning, embedded with dirt, grass and god only knows what else, they were a disgrace. But still – helping out in the fields for once wouldn't hurt Ren all too much; it would just make her perfect, pearly white nails end up like mine.
Ren rose from the ground and tossed her hair over her shoulder with an arrogant sigh. "Ming, we're going to look at the market. There's a new stall, women's clothing… I would invite you but… they wouldn't sell you much."
I glared up at my sister, and contented myself with throwing a small pebble at her legs.
"So immature." Ren tutted, along with Lin. They gave me small, mock-sympathetic smiles and stalked off, hips swinging, hair flying about their shoulders. Shang - out of sympathy - gave me a small wave, and followed the others.
I loved the area in which we lived. Long, rolling hills and countryside, isolated by far off beautiful mountains, enclosed by the spiralling body of the Changjiang River. It was an excellent area for farming, and it was far enough away from the Jiangdong palace and town so that we could be counted among the lucky few who didn't have to include themselves in the war affairs of the Sun family lineage. The palace was two days away by foot, but the village was still counted as part of Wu territory.
I had never been all that interested in war – I didn't want anything to do with it, and the idea of fighting amongst kingdoms for the sake of land was just… insanity. An even crazier debate than the one of which me and Ren were constantly arguing over.
My uncle was in the Wu army. He was many years younger than my father, and had the zest of adventure about him. We'd never been close, but he had a spark of energy which constantly seemed to dance around him, a twinkle in his eye which told you he was about to pull off something funny, a jump about his tone of voice which always emerged when he told me of his latest adventures of war. War was nothing to him – a game, in which you either won with flying colours, or became a failure and dishonour to your family. That was what he was all about – winning. He loved a challenge; anything which could get the adrenaline pumping. I don't know, but maybe some people like the sight of spewed guts, specks of precious blood dotted across fields, houses trampled underfoot and burnt in rebellion, humans thrown carelessly aside to the floor, some dead, some writhing in pain.
That was battle to me. Those were the horrors of war.
It was a nightmare, a twisted world of blood and destruction which I never wanted to become involved in. I never thought I'd have to go through the pain of watching someone die for the sake of a country, but I guess I just didn't see the reality of the nightmare looming only days ahead.
