Precious-Little-Girl: Happy Birthday, Papa!
This fic is dedicated to my father who is always here for me and Mama! . Even though I know how much you don't want to read things like this... I just wanna write something for you! XD I know that you will not read it though. ๐
Anyway... THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING, Papa! Buon Compleanno and MBTC!~ ๐
Disclaimer: I don't own Katekyo Hitmam Reborn.
Warning(s): OOC-ness, a 14 year-old grammar, Curses, UNEDITED, Unbeta'd
Reference from: KHR episode 40 and 64.
He Knows
Precious-Little-Girl
Timoteo knows Xanxus-his hatred, guilt, insecurity and most of all disappointment of him. He knows, since he is Xanxus' father, since Xanxus is his son.
He knows. He knows that at the moment he agreed to meet up with the woman, he will come to regret it sooner or later.
But he didn't expect that those words will spark the regret that his intuition had been warning him.
"This child is ours," The woman began, a shaky yet edgy smile etched on her face, motioning to the child beside her.
Disappointment and Resentment erupted like fire at woman who dared to say to him.
Just who is she to claim that he had a son with her? Someone desperate for money- supplied by himself.
However just as he was about to retort the woman's statement, he felt himself holding back.
She was entrapped by the delusion that her son is indeed born from him-the desperation of the woman proved it all; in her tone, eyes and action. She was endeared that introducing her child to him would save them from poverty- or at least save her child from it.
Her voice turned to hopeful, "He is the Tenth who will succeed the Ninth."
He was taken aback by her statement. Yes, she is aware about the Mafia and his status quo, but just how much does she want her son to be involved? Be the tenth? He knows that this child doesn't have any chance to succeed the family, with the requirements and conditions and all.
But when he looked at the young boy, Xanxus, his piercing read eyes staring at his own dark brown irises, he can't help but feel pity, yet at the same time angered.
Xanxus has also been enchanted by the thought that he is his father. By that, he can't help but be succumb to the decision of accepting the child to his own.
"That's why I used 'X,' which means ten, and named him Xanxus."
Xanxus, showed his palm, curled into half a fist, he focused on it and after a few seconds, a flame he know very well lit at the child's hands.
His eyes softened, but in the inside he felt like he was being crushed little by little as he said those words,"That is the Vongola's Dying Will Flame."
He removed the scarf he was wearing as he knelt in front of him. He wrapped it around in the boy's neck.
"There's no mistake you are my son."
Those words of his sealed the start of his biggest regret.
But the way the child's eyes widened in relief, made him regret ever saying those words. As Xanxus, at tender age of 10, had believed that he is his son, the next in line as the Boss of the Vongola.
As Xansus had started his life knowing that he, Timoteo, is his father.
I am going to meet a woman who claims to have given birth to my son. It is impossible for a woman I've never met to give birth to my child. However, her situation was far too sad for me to reject her claim. I could not cloud the eyes of that boy, who believed his mothers words.
Timoteo catered the child with everything-money, honor, status and his equal fatherly love. But there will come a time that he needs to tell Xanxus the truth, yet... The number of times he tried is the number of time he failed.
He knows that it is his fault. He shouldn't have gone along Xanxus' mother's claim. He should have just told the truth of the child's heritage.
Xanxus grew up, poisoned with the false belief that he is his son. That he, Xanxus, will be the one to become the Vongola Decimo.
He doesn't want his son, adopted or not, to be hurt when the time comes that he discovered the truth. But he didn't want to ruin his son's dreams.
He had a feeling that something bad will happen if he delayed telling everything to Xanxus. In all aspects, Xanxus has all the rights to know.
Xanxus should know.
That is what his intuition screamed inside him.
But he couldn't bear to let him know the truth now.
Not now...
Someday he will...
The Ninth is known to be wise with his decision, but for now against his wise views and the legendary intuition he inherited, he decided to keep the secret longer.
"I am the 9th's son, I cannot eat with you, Boss candidates from the branch families."
By that time, Timoteo knows that Xanxus is far too gone. He knows that Xanxus is far too gone to know the truth.
The thought of being his son and the next Vongola Boss had corrupted him too much.
Xanxus needs to know the truth. Now.
But the image of Xanxus crumbling at the truth kept on repeating in his mind. He had heard about how adopted children often acted when they knew the truth, and in all honesty, he is afraid that this will happen to the both of them.
He couldn't bear to loose the bond he has with Xanxus. He couldn't bear to wake up one morning and see Xanxus looking at him like a stranger then the man who had been his father.
He will just let things as they are was his firm response to himself.
He reluctantly fought his son, not as a father, but as the Boss of the Famiglia that Xanxus had dared to attack.
He should have expected that Xanxus will find out that he is not his real son. Though he preferred if the truth came out from his mouth, not from his journal.
"I always thought of you as my real child." Timoteo claims, before he sealed Xanxus during the Crib Incident.
It has been years since he had imprisoned Xanxus in his Zero Point Breakthrough.
Their fight remained fresh in his mind.
How could he even forget that?
Nevertheless, he knows that everything is his fault. Should he not be a coward all these years, this might not have happened. Should he just told Xanxus in the beginning, he wouldn't be like this.
If he had just had the courage to tell Xanxus the truth, he wouldn't end up like this. He wouldn't end up as his son frozen.
Still, he knows that he deserve it. He deserve it all.
The hatred and mistrust towards him. Everything that backfired to him. He deserved it all.
He broke his son.
He broke his Xanxus.
He broke his beloved son in hiding the bitter truth that he should have known from the start.
He made him believe all his life about his false heritage. He made him believe that he is destined for the greatest things. (A/N: To Filipino readers: MGA PAASA. Ang mga paasa talaga nasa palgid mo lang, no? Yung tao pang hindi mo inaasahang paaasahin ka ang siyang nagpaasa sa iyo. Haysss.)
Though, with coup d'etat and all the trying to kill him part... He can't help but forgive Xanxus in all that.
Even with the Vongola's insistence of killing him and/or removing him from the family, he remained firm.
Xanxus did not betray him; he was the one who betrayed his son.
And no matter what...
Xanxus is his son...
Xanxus doesn't need to beg forgiveness in the family.
Xanxus didn't do anything wrong because what happened is the consequence of his decision.
"I'm very sorry Xanxus."
He kept on saying these words every time he went to see him even though it will never be enough for him to be forgiven.
Still, at the very end, he considers him as his son. And as a father to his son, he cannot stand seeing him imprisoned in that cage of ice.
Timoteo raised his scepter, his Sky Flames flickering wildly with remorse and guilt. He walked nearer to his frozen son and focused as he melt the ice with the very flame that created it.
The ice dissipated into vapor and water, and the body of his son trapped inside it fell limp.
Timoteo can't suppress the shudder of guilt and self hate at the scars that littered in Xanxus' visible skin.
These are the scars that showed how much he had hurt his son... Intentionally and Unintentional... Mentally... Physically... Emotionally...
"The Varia will be getting you out of here, Xanxus." He whispered softly to the barely breathing body before he left.
That's right. Xanxus' guardians will be coming for him, so there is no need for him to be here. And even if he is, his son will surely be in a rampage again.
He knows that the Varia will be taking care of his son as he recovers with them.
When the Varia had stolen the half Vongola rings, he knew that Xanxus still hadn't given up with his aspiration in being the Decimo.
He would have let him do what he pleases but his action had sent everyone in the Vongola in the edge of their seats.
They are afraid of Xanxus. They are also afraid of the civilian heir that he had chosen.
They do not want a mere teenager inheriting the seat of the Vongola... Yet they don't want to leave it to the hands of the son that started a coup d'รฉtat years ago.
He knows that his son cannot inherit the position, knowing the conditions that Xanxus cannot meet. With that he is sure that no harm can be done to the family.
Xanxus should have known that he cannot inherit the family himself but the death of his brothers had sparked back his desire to do so. He knows that with his brothers gone, he might have a chance, even without the blood relation.
'This must be his way of getting back at me,' Timoteo contemplated (A/N: To Filipino readers here: Contemplate? Di ba ibig sabihin nito ay kaunti ang plato? :3).
Until now...
Until now... I thought that Iemitsu's son, Sawada Tsunayoshi was a worthy successor and acted as such. However perhaps because I am close to death, by intuition I changed course and chose a new successor, my son, Xanxus. He is truly worthy to become the Vongola Decimo.
However, there will be those who are unhappy with this change. That is why Iemitsu fought against handing the rings to Xanxus.
However, I do not wish for my Family to fight amongst itself for no reason. Thus we will begin the decisive battle to decide who will be the official successor, through a method we can all agree on.
The Vongola Rings that you both require becoming the true successor... To decide who has the right to these, we will begin the decisive between Sawada Tsunayoshi's family and the Varia.
The time that Timoteo was forced to mark a certain order by his signature Sky Flame and the time that he was used as a Gola Mosca battery, he knows what his son desires.
At the same time, he knows that his son is afraid. He knows that his son is afraid to make the Vongola vulnerable with the civilian that he had chosen as an heir.
Despite the thoughts of the other members of the famiglia that Xanxus only wants to fight to admonish the competition because of his addiction to the position, he knows that Xanxus only did that to secure that the Vongola will have a suitable heir, no matter where the heir came from. Civilian or not.
He was proud, to say at least. The courage that drove Xanxus to do this is overwhelming. No hint of depression, just aggression. His son, his son... His son is such a brave man. He wanted to go through every possible way to get what he wanted, not caring for the humiliation that it might bring.
He is so damn proud how Xanxus cares for the famiglia- not as someone who wants to be the Decimo anymore, but someone who owes the family.
So when he was forced by Xanxus to go along his plans, he complied. For now, all he wants is to see what his son is going to do, to help him, even just a little.
(Because deep inside him, boy matter how much he desires to be a father that supports his son, he can't do it to Xanxus, not with the Vongola's vulnerability in line)
When Xanxus provoked Tsuna with him, he knows that Xanxus doesn't want to do it.
When he was about to lose his consciousness afterwards he knows that Xanxus feels guilty about it.
When he heard Xanxus laugh at him, he knows that it is fake.
Moreover, when he heard Xanxus had decided to fight Tsunayoshi and had the Varia in the edge, he knows that Xanxus is angry to himself.
Not too long after, he knows how contented, yet saddened Xanxus was after the battle, when he found out that Tsunayoshi and his family are suitable to lead the Vongola and when he found out that he really can't be a candidate and heir in the first place.
"Xanxus."
"Tch. Old man."
Timoteo decided to confront Xanxus after the ring conflict and after they had returned to Italy.
"Thank you and I'm sorry."
"What the fvck." Came an irritated response.
"I should have told you a long time ago the truth. You should have known from the start. I know how much I hurt you... I know how much a failure of a father I am too... I'm sorry..."He explained."But... Thank you... Thank you for caring for the family..."
"What the hell do you know?" Xanxus snarled.
"I know you, Xanxus."Timoteo answered, his eyes softening and lips showing a fatherly smile. "You are my son and I know you well. I understand what you feel and what you do. I understand your fears, insecurities and anger. I know and understand you, Xanxus."
"The fvcking hell with this drama."
Without further ado, Xanxus started to leave Timoteo.
"Even though you still have hatred with what happened," Timoteo said, stopping Xanxus midway."You are still my son and that will never change."
"Old Man."
"And no matter how disappointed you are with me, I'll still be here for you, as your father. I'll be here to redeem myself as your father."
"Tch. The fuck with a melodramatic Father."
END
Story Rant:
I just noticed that there are very few who writes a fic about Timoteo and Xanxus so I tried to write one. XD ...And I just know how I fail in it. :( This is inspired by my Father's love and birthday AND The Difference Between by Bleach-ed-Natsu (to those who haven't read it, please do! It's really awesome. It's rated M for violence and abuse only).
Thank you for your time reading this.
