"No matter what you do it will happen; and there's nothing you can do to stop it."

"No I acted without your consent, in defiance of your orders. Everything I have done had been to save my family! No one Controls Me!" Rip said Angrily. Beginning to feel lightheaded and sick to his stomach.

"We counted on that." Druce said "Your anger, on you going rouge. We needed something to spur you on, to give you purpose." Rip couldn't believe what he was hearing, the sick feeling turning to nausea.

"That's why we ordered Savage to kill your family." No, Oh God, No! Rip bent forward sure he was going to vomit. It felt like Druce's words cut right through him. He began screaming and Druce just laughed. His head began to spin, "Ordered Savage to kill your family; No Matter what you do it will happen. Nothing you can do." Rip began to scream and then he felt himself falling...Visions of Miranda and Jonas dead flooded his mind. Savage killing them ruthlessly right in front of him, forced to watch in his own mind. Black…

Rip awoke; heart pounding, stomach churning. It took him a moment to get his bearings and realize he was back on the Waverider, safe and in his own quarters. Druces' words still echoing from his all too fresh nightmare. "That's why we ordered Savage to kill your family." Rip shuddered. He sat on the end of his bed head in his hands breathing slowly attempting to calm his churning stomach. The confrontation with Druce and his men along with loosing Snart had taken a toll on him as well as the others. Rip felt responsible for these young people he had recruited for this mission. A harsh breath escapes him; Mission…More like a failure. What he thought was a mission to save his family and turned out to be a farce.

"We've been using the Occulus to manipulate you."

He heard Druce say again in his racing mind. How could he have been so stupid he thought to himself. Rising from the bed to try to ease the nausea that had taken hold he began to pace the small room he occupied. Walking to a small table he picked up a photo of his family, trying desperately to hold back tears. "No Matter what you do, it will happen." Rip shook away the memory, trying to calm himself but losing the battle. "We needed something to spur you on, to give your purpose." Rip placed the photo back down and placed his hands on the table for support, breath becoming shallow as he fought back the increasing nausea. It didn't appear to be working.

His mind racing now he was losing the battle against his stomach, as he felt the bile rise he stumbled to his bathroom dropping to one knee in front of the toilet. A harsh gag resonating from within producing nothing. Disgusted with himself and heartsick for his family he couldn't stop the thoughts from coming.

"You and your team have been moving through the course of time, we redirected it."

Rip felt bile rising again; Oh God what had they done; allowing a monster like Savage to roam freely through time he thought. Did that make him a monster to? He had no further time to process this though as he leant forward vomiting profusely into the bowl his hands white as he fiercely gripped the rim for all he was worth. Druces' words echoing once again through his head.

"That's why we ordered Savage to kill your family."

Oh God, I've killed my family! Hot tears spilled from his eyes as he continued to vomit trying to rid himself of the guilt and shame he felt for what happened to his family and Snart by allowing Savage to live. Eventually the vomiting ceased but the unrelenting nausea persisted. He slid down the wall using it for support; completely spent from vomiting. His face wet with tears, he didn't feel any better or more at peace. Savage would have to pay for what he did one way or the other. He couldn't bring his family back no matter what he did. He now knew as a time master, the past truly couldn't be changed for his family. He would always wind up here. Emotions wrung out; facing endless guilt for what had transpired. Tears began falling again unabated.

After a while he stood feeling dizzy, lightheaded and tired; no doubt from dehydration. Spent physically and emotionally he left the bathroom and went back to his bed grabbing some water on the way. Laying down he fell into a fitful sleep plagued with more nightmares. Dreams of his wife and son in happier times, followed by shear despair as he found them murdered again and again.

Waking again to vomit what little was left he repeated the harsh routine; not knowing yet that someone was watching him. Someone who at one time grieved their own loss and knew what Rip was going through. Someone who wanted to let him know it would be okay and that Savage would one day die.

So that's it for this chapter. Who is this mystery person? You'll have to wait to find out. I'm still unsure of my writing. Reviews and constructive (positive) criticism is welcome. Thanks so much for reading, I'll add the second/final chapter soon.