Summary: Otae and Shinpachi visit a shrine, and Otae ends up being pulled down an old, boarded-up well. Turns out she's the reincarnation of some priestess from the Warring States era. Who knew? Contains smatterings of Kyuubei/Otae.

Disclaimer: I own neither Gintama nor Inuyasha.

A/N: I won't lie – the inspiration for this fic came almost entirely from the fact that Otae and Kagome share the same voice actress.

Warnings: Major fourth wall breakage from the Gintama characters, silliness.

When traveling through time, try not to step on any bugs!

Chapter One

"Oh my, this shrine is so beautiful. Don't you think so, Shin-chan?"

Shinpachi was a fairly perceptive young man, especially in relation to pretty much everyone around him, but even he sometimes had trouble reading his sister's moods. She was smiling at the moment, but that told him absolutely nothing; she was pretty much always smiling.

He normally wouldn't have let his sister's uncertain mood affect him so much, but he had this awful feeling in the pit of his stomach. A sense of doom that practically guaranteed that something catastrophic was about to happen.

And it was all focused on Otae.

"Y-yeah," he replied, trying his best to keep the tremor out of his voice. "I'm really glad that the government decided to preserve it as an historical site." Which was true. The Shogun may have allowed greedy alien bastards to use Japan as an all-purpose trading post, but he wasn't one for disrespecting history. And though Shinpachi was very much a product of a post-Amanto Earth, with a deep appreciation for many of the changes wrought by the extraterrestrials – not the least of which being his abiding love for a certain Idol singer, who, in another universe, would've probably remained some poor peasant girl from an obscure fishing village – his Samurai spirit also imbued within him a healthy appreciation for his heritage.

His sister's smile remained unchanged, and they walked over to where a miko was dutifully sweeping the floor.

"Excuse me," said Otae, her manner the very picture of polite interest. "We're here to visit your Goshinboku. We brought our own gohei."

The priestess was a dainty, dark-eyed girl with her dark hair pulled back in a long braid. And, when she looked up from her chore, her gaze widened. "Ah..." she said, staring at Otae like she was some kind of deformed mutant. "Is there any particular reason that you want to make an offering?"

Otae's smile was practically sparkling now. "Of course."

The priestess swallowed visibly, apparently picking up on the aura of doom that also had Shinpachi on edge. Her gaze flickered to a wooden shed to her left. "Very well, then. Just...uh...don't go near the sealed well. It's very unstable, and you might...get hurt."

"Thank you for the warning." Otae continued smiling, and unwrapped an enameled wooden box that was slung in a cloth over her shoulder. "I brought this as a donation for the shrine," she said, and the miko took the box from her with a polite nod.

Shinpachi instantly felt a surge of concern for the unsuspecting young woman, and resolved to sneak off at some point to warn her against eating the box's contents.

As it happened, a fat cat crossed their path as they made their way to their intended destination, veering off towards the sealed well that the priestess had explicitly warned them about. Otae stopped short and gazed after it, her smile finally fading as her brows drew together in concern. "Oh dear, he's going to hurt himself."

She walked after it, and Shinpachi began to feel nauseous.

It was difficult to make out its actual shape in the murk of the shed, but the cat was meowing pointedly – obviously near the well itself. Otae walked down the stairs, cooing, "There, there. Be a good kitty and come to Tae-chan."

Shipachi really didn't like the way the planks of the stairs were creaking under his sister's weight.

"Here, kitty kitty."

Otae finally reached the well, and Shinpachi was dreadfully certain that he wasn't imagining the gooseflesh creeping up his arms. He opened his mouth to urge his sister to hurry, but was interrupted before the sound had even started to form.

Because something had just exploded.

And a giant, bare-breasted centipede monster snatched Otae up like she was a weightless ragdoll, pulling her down into the depths of the no-longer-sealed well.


"You have the Shikon Jewel!" the monster said, licking Otae's cheek. "I can feel its power inside of you!"

"How disgusting," said Otae, seemingly oblivious to the fact that she was falling through a mysterious void. Her expression turned murderous.

Since she didn't have her spear, she settled for punching the creature full in the face. But when her hand collided with its flesh, it released a burst of white energy, and the monster's jaw melted clean away.

It screamed in agony and retreated, and Otae soon found her feet planted once more on solid ground. Smoothing down her kimono, she glanced around her new surrounding, concluding that she was at the bottom of the well. Or at least, she was at the bottom of a well. There were vines growing down its sides, after all, which implied that it had not been sealed like the one at the shrine. In any case, they provided a convenient aide in climbing out of the well.

"That Amanto had better not have landed me somewhere weird," she said, hoisting herself over the lip of the well and onto dewy, uncut grass.

She smiled. "Hello! Is there anybody here?"

There was no reply, and a vein began to throb in her temple. "I'll gut that Amanto if I see her again," she vowed, and began to walk forward. The well was in a clearing, and it too only a few moments of walking before she entered a full-blown forest.

She continued walking for a few minutes until she came across a particularly impressive tree – but that wasn't what caught her eye. Rather, it was the white-haired, dog-eared boy pinned to its trunk with an arrow sticking out of his chest. It was possible that the boy was still alive – Amanto often had different anatomy than humans, after all – but Otae was still horrified by the sight, and found herself compelled to try and help him.

She rushed over to the giant tree and clambered onto one of its thick roots, climbing upwards until she reached the unfortunate young man. She touched his neck to check for a pulse.

There wasn't one, but his skin was warm. Maybe he was in some weird cryogenic Amanto sleep?

She slapped him.

He didn't wake up. "Oh dear," she said, and slapped him again. Still no response.

"Is there really nobody out there?!" she called.

As if in answer, an arrow whizzed past her right ear, and she turned around to find a group of men bearing torches, an elderly priestess holding the bow.

"Get away from Inuyasha!" said the priestess.

Otae blinked. "Oh, I'm terribly sorry. I didn't realize that being near him was taboo." She stepped down from the trees' roots without any fanfare. "I was brought here by an Amanto, you see, and I don't know quite what to do."

The priestess blinked back. "'Amanto'?" she said. "What are you talking about?"

Otae cocked her head to the side. "You seem to be quite rural, but surely you're not that out-of-touch."

Frowning, the priestess said, "I'm sorry, but I can't take any risks," and nodded to the men accompanying her. At once, the moved towards Otae, and she saw that one of them was holding a rope.

"I'm sorry as well," said Otae.


"I'm sorry for doubting your intentions, Otae-sama," said Kaede, ladling some stew into the younger woman's bowl.

Otae took it with a smile. "No need to apologize, Kaede-sama. It's only natural, given the circumstances. I only hope that I didn't hurt your villagers too badly."

"Ah...I'm sure they'll all recover soon enough." A beat. "Are you certain that you come from a future era?"

Otae sipped at the stew thoughtfully, then said, "I'm very certain. And, given all the other bizarre things that happen in my series, I don't think that time travel is all that far-fetched. Especially after that crossover we did with Sket Dance."

"I see," said Kaede, in a tone that made it clear she questioned Otae's sanity. "And you think a youkai is responsible?"

"An Amanto," she replied. "We're more of a science fiction/action/gag series, so aliens and technology are usually the go-to explanation for situations like this."

Kaede nodded sagely, as if she understood. "You may call it what you wish, but I think it's safest to assume it was a youkai." She gazed at Otae's face for a long moment. "You bear a striking resemblance to my late sister Kikyo. And if you are from the future, as you say, then it's likely you're her reincarnation. It probably targeted you because it thought you had the Shikon Jewel."

"It did mention something about a jewel," said Otae, setting down the soup. "Though I'd appreciate it if you could skip the long-winded exposition about how I'm connected to it. The readers are probably aware of it already, so we needn't bore them. And I don't particularly care myself."

Kaede blinked. "You say very strange things, Otae-sama."

Otae smiled radiantly. "Thank you so much for the food; it was delicious."


"Youkai attack! Youkai attack!" yelled one of the villagers. It wasn't necessary – anybody with a functioning pair of eyes, ears, or even nostrils, could tell that the village was under attack.

"How terrible!" Otae exclaimed, looking at the scene with genuine horror. It was the same Amanto that had dragged her down the well, and it was cutting through the houses in its path like a sharp pair of scissors through toilet paper.

"Give it to me – the Shikon Jewel!"

Otae felt rage coiling hot and unforgiving in the pit of her stomach, and she did her best to keep it under control. This wasn't some gorilla-faced stalker that could be dealt with by a swift blow to the back of the head; this was a monster far larger and stronger than she. She remembered Kaede's words – that she somehow held the sacred jewel that the beast was after – and didn't hesitate.

"I'm right here you hideous slut!" she yelled, and began to run down the path that lead through the rice paddies and into the forest, hoping to draw the creature as far from the village as possible.

The creature took the bait and followed, its speed thankfully less impressive than its strength. Otae's feet seemed to have developed a mind of their own, as she found herself drawn towards the sacred tree she had seen the dog-eared boy on earlier. And, once she reached it, her body was compelled to climb up its giant branches.

"Wake up!" she yelled at the boy, shaking his shoulders. "Wake up, you fluffy-eared bastard!"

There was a pulse of energy, and she felt his heartbeat resonate throughout his entire body.

"Kikyo," he said, his voice barely audible. Then, louder. "I can smell you, Kikyo."

"That's not my name," said Otae pleasantly.

He blinked down at her. "You're...not Kikyo."

"As I said."

The centipede Amanto gave a mighty screech as it caught sight of her, and lunged towards the tree.

"Looks like you're under attack, wench," said the dog-eared boy, smirking. "Maybe I'll help you if you take the arrow out of my chest."

Otae smiled in spite of the danger. "Oh really?" Grasping the arrow in question, she said, "Do I take it out like this?"

She twisted it. Hard.

Inuyasha yelled in pain, his body vibrating with a desire to flinch in upon itself. "You...bitch," he growled from between clenched teeth.

The Amanto had reached the tree, twining herself around its immense trunk. She was starting to crush the both of them with her body.

"My mistake," said Otae, her voice betraying strain at the insectoid body crushing her against him. "Here, let me try again." When she grabbed a hold of the arrow this time, it simply disintegrated into sparks of light.

There was another pulse, and she could swear that his eyes flashed red. He grinned, fangs gleaming menacingly, and sliced into the other Amanto's body as if it were made of rice paper. Otae was sent flying into the air as he pushed her aside, and she felt a peculiar pain in her side, as well as something that she could only describe as a...presence...coming out of the place where the pain originated. She watched with somewhat detached fascination as a pink, faintly-glowing jewel, still sticky with blood, flew past her and onto the ground.

She followed soon after, landing with a thump on the damp grass of the forest floor, and yelled, "A jewel just flew out of my body! You should probably get it before the monster does, or else the author will have to write out a tedious action sequence that most of the readers have already seen done far better in the anime!" She pointed to where it had landed. "It's over there."

Apparently too intent on the jewel to be fazed by Otae breaking the fourth wall, Inuyasha leaped to where she pointed, picking up the jewel with a greedy expression in his eyes. He then proceeded to shred the centipede monster with one hand, until the dismembered chunks of her flesh lay desiccated on the ground.

It took him only a moment to turn to her, a maniacal grin on his face. "Not the smartest, are you? Since I have this, I no longer need you alive."

Otae smiled serenely. "This isn't Yu Yu Hakusho – the main character isn't going to die in the first chapter."

He lunged at her, though she could tell his heart wasn't really in it, and she dodged it easily.

"Inuyasha!" called Kaede, entering the clearing with her bow drawn. "Give back the Shikon jewel before you do something foolish."

He gave Kaede a once-over, then spat, "Keh!" and began to run towards the river.

Kaede must have anticipated that he would try to escape, as she pulled out a string of beads – a rosary, really – and began to chant in some ancient, incomprehensible language. Otae watched, impressed, as the beads were engulfed in light, disassembled, and flew in the direction where Inuyasha had fled.

"Follow him quickly and give the command of subjugation!" Kaede instructed her, and Otae was more than willing to oblige.

Otae caught up to him at the bridge and yelled, "Sit!" while he was still in midair. The rosary that was now around his neck gave a pulse of power, the beads emitting a faint light, and he was plunged down onto the bridge – breaking it with the forced of his fall.

Otae's smile took on a rather sinister quality, and she called down, "You should've known it would turn out this way. No character gets animal ears without paying a price."