Chapter One: Awakening
The school bell rang over head as I headed down the hallway to my next class. Unbelievable, just unbelievable I have never been late to class, never. A constant stream of self-loathing lashed about in my brain as I finally dashed to my seat in AP Calculus. Senior year, my last year of high school and I couldn't even be on time to class. Not to mention, I had already finished achieving outstandingly high scores on both my SAT and ACT. Yet, here I was late to class.
"Maka!" A 'hushed' whisper rang towards my ear as I plopped down in my seat, as silently as I could. Although I'm unsure why I even tried to be quiet, considering BlackStar's voice caught everyone's attention.
"Maka…" My stomach gripped.
"I know, I'm late. Shut up, I have to pay attention extra hard now." My two pigtails whipped around and smacked me as I turned to scold him.
This did no good, however as he continued yammering: "Why were you late," "Why do you look so disheveled," "This is basically the last week of schoo-"
He didn't stop speaking for a moment, which did horrible things to my concentration. Why was I late to class BlackStar, well let me tell you: sometimes, because clearly I'm losing all touch on my sanity, I hear a boy speaking to me in my head and when this happens I tend to black out and as cliché as it sounds, I see some sort of faint light in the distant. And well yes, of course BlackStar, that voice is calling me to the light. As being so distracted by this fake conversation in my head, the bell rang before I even got to write a legitimate note down. In a failed attempt to then avoid BlackStar, I scurried from the room, however his mop of spiking black hair chased me all the way to my next class. Which of course, we had together with Dr. Stein, who unlike the name was a rather normal man. Regardless of the amount of Frankenstein jokes he got, he was a rather effective teacher. Tsubaki also happened to be in this class. She (thank God) was very good at taming the one and only spastic ball of over excitement, that BlackStar is. Really it's odd the meek girl decided to dye her hair such a bright blue. But, it's whatever floats your boat.
And right as Professor Stein calmly walked into class, wearing his classic lab coat, I heard it again:
"Please Maka…"
"I'm… sorry. I would do anything…"
Get out. I'm not crazy. You're not crazy. The OCD boy who refuses to be called by anything other than Death the Kid, is crazy. You're quite sane and not dating someone a foot taller than you, while also dating someone a foot shorter than you. And they're siblings what's up with that. Regardless of what I could tell myself though, the world around me became dark and dull. People fading like wispy ghost. My head even almost hit the desk, leaving a very concernedBlackStar and Tsubaki to stare at me for the rest of class, while I fought the black room with the light at the end, and the man's voice. A voice which left my stomach feeling horrendously empty, like I had somehow forgot something terribly important to me.
Class ended, the day went by, the stares of my friends did not leave. Even when I tried to throw them off by talking about the weird love circle of Death the Kid. Nor did me trying to distract them with the school bully, Crona, picking on little tiny Ragnarok again. Where did parents come up with these names. And just when I was finally getting ready to escape from them, I was hit with:
"I really don't think you should drive yourself home!" A very concerned Tsubaki shouted at me as I marched quickly ahead to my car, beating BlackStar off me with a nice hardback.
"Maka stop chopping me! I don't want you to die! Whatever will I do without your class notes! I won't pass without you!"
"As very touching at that is BlackStar, I'm perfectly capable of driving my own self to my house, and Tsubaki, I'll even promise to just curl up, with a nice book, for the rest of the day." I defended myself as I quickly sat in my car, locking the door to keep a certain self-claiming ninja out.
With much reluctance, a very unhappy Tsubaki said okay and peeled BlackStar off my driver side door, and I began my ride home. Just when I reached the freeway I heard it, because I refuse to except this strange boy in my head again.
"I guess I know how you felt after- now…"
No. Shut up, you aren't real. But something was tugging on me. I could almost physically feel it, like a tiny string in my chest, pulling on something hidden away behind my heart. The world edged with black.
"If you wake up, there's nothing I won't do for you Maka…"
My car was starting to veer off towards the side. I couldn't see well enough to drive at this point, and I was fighting it. You have a loving father and mother waiting for you at home. It will destroy them if you wreck.
"-love you…"
"Maka- so much…"
"I never could have made it this far without you…"
And my world was completely black, I heard a car's tires screeching and colliding with something. I knew I was in the middle of a horrible accident, but there was that tugging in my chest and while I knew I was alone in my car, I could swear someone was holding my hand. Soul. I got my sight back for a moment when I thought that word, that name? Only to see a small frowning devil in a checkered room, and then an upside-down tree, right before my car dove into it. Or maybe it was my car that was upside-
I lurched up in bed. My mind completely blank of actual information. Where am I. Who am I. Why can't I breathe. Somethings in my throat and I can't breathe. These sheets are itchy and things are pinching my arms. My fingers leapt for my mouth to claw out whatever contraption was located there; I could hear the sounds of mechanical breathing and the steady beep of a monitor. I couldn't get my eyes open, or maybe they were and it was too dark to see. I heard someone move to my left and desperately tried to make my eyes cooperate, but they would not. So, I did the next best thing, I dodged to the right, which was clearly not the next best thing because I hit something cold and hard, and what felt like multiple needles were ripped out of my arms.
The monitor, which was steadily beeping, now ran a flat line as two hands desperately tried to peel me off the floor. "Maka, Maka fuck. Maka, calm down, okay, I'm here. I'm here."
I couldn't tell if the voice was trying to calm me or him, but it sounded familiar. Wasn't I driving, how did I get here. Why can't I remember anything? Eyes work. His hands were surprising soft on my arms as they trailed their way to my hands, something sparked in my brain. A flash of something sharp, an irrational thought, a scream. I'm Maka, Maka Albarn. A graduate from the Death Weapon Meister Academy. My papa is Spirit- A searing pain ripped through my head as I whimpered but my vision finally came into focus.
"Maka?" Two shockingly red eyes peered into mine. A fluff of white hair, which appeared to be in no way styled, wafted in the light breeze from the fan above.
Behind what appeared to be an albino, yet disturbingly attractive man, was Professor Stein. Except unlike the Stein I knew, this one had a giant screw sticking out of his head. Which he was toying with. An in-numeral amount of hospital noises were screaming all around us, and I realized I had dislocated myself from a small white bed. I must've been taken here after the car accident; no, I don't have a car. This boy has a motorcycle. But how would I know that?
"Hey." The red eyed boy brushed my hair behind my ear and his hand rested there, on the side of my face, in the most natural way. Tingles went down my spine, as I felt that odd tugging in my chest again. I realized my heart was beating insanely fast and took the first breath in what felt like years.
His other hand expertly wrapped my hospital gown back around my naked body, I realized with embarrassment as more people entered the room, some I recognized, others I did not. "Can you tell me your name?" He almost whispered to me, like he was afraid to hear the answer.
"…" I opened my mouth to speak, but only a raspy sound came out. I felt the panic that startled me out of the bed earlier start to rise again, before the boy engulfed me in his arms. Instantly I felt at home. Yet I could not tell you the faintest reason why.
"It's okay, take it slow." His voice tickled my ear, in our now very close proximity. My arms snaked around him as I took a breath and rested my head on his broad shoulder.
"I'm Maka. Maka Albarn. Alumni to Death Weapon Meister Academy." My voice sounded quiet, weak. Not at all like I remembered it. Almost like I hadn't spoken in months.
"Do you know who I-"
"Do you know how you ended up here." A very calculated Dr. Stein cut off the boy I was currently wrapped around, who now looked as peeved as one can look, when they also appear as if they've witnessed a miracle.
"I was in a car accident?" I desperately wanted to be right, but knew I was horribly wrong.
The albino boy looked instantly concerned, but the doctor spoke. "I was worried this was going to happen. You were on a mission in Barcelona with your death scythe, Soul, and it went awry…" He paused as if I could fill him in, before he continued. "Long story short you dove in front of your weapon partner, which is extremely unorthodox, to protect him from the kishin, which you were supposed to be exterminating."
Kishin, I know what that is. A human gone down the wrong path, consuming human souls for power etc. Weapon partner: what the DWMA is there for. I'm a meister, that's why I'd be with a partner, naturally. My mother was an amazing meister. My papa a little bit more of a sleaze, but she made him into a death scythe. But who was Soul, when did I make a death scythe?
"So everything I'm messing up right now, such as BlackStar and Tsubaki having swapped hair colors, me being a senior in a normal high school, you not having a screw in your head, was all a dream?"
"Yes."
"Okay but, my brain is completely scattered, I'm not sure what's real and what's not."
"You were in a coma for six months." The boy flinched and pulled away from me, looking insanely guilty. "The black blood in your system is clearly what saved you, but I also believe it is what kept you down for so long, the black blood still wants you in its grip. And I'm assuming a lot of this time was you fighting losing sanity. Your memories should fall into place in time…"
"What?" I didn't understand why the professor drifted off speaking.
"Can you tell me who that is sitting in front of you Maka. It's clear your body responds to him, but your mind?"
"…no." I was afraid to say it. The white-haired boy looked hurt, and while he tried to hide it, some part of me could just tell. His hands slid down to my hands as he stoically helped me back onto the bed, for him to sit at the side of the bed. A little farther away from me as if he was making me uncomfortable. In reality however, I felt his absence like a wound to the chest.
"I was afraid of that. I theorize that the black blood, which you received through resonating with Soul, your weapon partner and death scythe, sitting beside you there, knows he is your gateway to sanity and is therefore trying to block memories of him."
"Soul." I said his name almost questioningly, wanting the boy to move closer to me again. But, he was frozen, removing a plain silver ring from his finger to hide away in his pocket. Just when I was getting ready to inquire why, Stein interrupted:
"You received a major injury to your chest cavity, my hope is that as this heals, the black blood in your system will subside and your memories will return. However, this could not be the case-"
"MMMMAAAAAKKKKKKKAAAAAA!" I heard a shrill screech from the hall and Soul simultaneously popped up from the bed. Moving to try to block the incoming man from the hall, who shoved past a stunned silent crowd of my friends: BlackStar (silence was new for him), Tsubaki, Death the Kid (whose name and relationship status seemed entirely normal now), Patty, Liz, even little Crona and Ragnarok (boy did my dream get that one wrong); and then flung a sturdy looking Soul right into the wall, before pouncing on me.
Eliciting a shrill shriek, I did not know I was capable of, nor did I realize the amount of pain I was in until a heavy weight landed on my chest. At the sound of my pain, a very angry Soul ripped who I now realized was my papa, off my body, leading to an instant war of dodged punches; before Stein could pull them apart.
"I'm sorry pretty boy, do you think you have more of a right to my daughter than I do!" Spirit screamed.
"I do when you're causing her unnecessary pain." Soul huffed back instantly changing Spirits attitude.
"Oh! MY POOR BABY MAKA. Are you alright? Did I hurt you? Let me kiss it and make it better?" His constant monologue did not end as he darted around my bed, sweating with worry.
With a hand clasped to my chest, I muttered, "I'm fine, really, leave me be papa. I don't have a book to fend you off with."
Stein spoke up, glaring at Spirit. "It would really be best if Maka were not over stimulated, while she's trying to regain her memory. Or be further harmed. Maybe its best we leave her alone to recover, or if she prefers she could recover from home." He paused to shoot warning glances at a now scared Spirit and a stoic Soul. "Wherever you believe that home to be."
"You're always welcome with me too Maka." Tsubaki piped up from the corner and just when BlackStar began to scream, she dug her heel into his foot. I'd have to thank her for that later.
"COME WITH ME MY BABY MAKA. I'LL TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOU I PROMISE-"
"PAPA." I cut him off. The tugging in my chest told me where my home was. Even if I didn't know why. "I'm going home with Soul as soon as Dr. Stein okays it."
Spirit began pouting and stormed from the room, possibly partially from fear of Stein. Soul nor anyone else in the room, could hide the relief my decision had brought them. "There's hope for you yet," Kid seemed to say in Soul's direction. "Now if you'll excuse me I must speak to my father…"
Kid politely exited the room, followed by his two weapon partners, and a very clever Tsubaki dragging a certain blue haired ninja, who was throwing a temper tantrum.
"You've been physically capable of going home for weeks, it was only the matter of you waking up. There will be weekly checkups by me. I'll call before I come. But, I'll leave you both to it, Soul knows where your belongings are." Stein ticked his screw about as he politely exited the room, closing the door.
"Soul."
His red eyes darted to mine and then away, he seemed unsure of what to do. I scooted closer to him to wrap my arms around his shoulders, and bury my face between his shoulder blades. He seemed to relax some under my touch. Almost like it melted him as much as it did me.
I ignored all the inappropriate thoughts being this close to him brought to me, and spoke. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I can't remember you. I'm sorry, I don't know what happened and I can see it's killing you-"
There were tears beginning to leave my eyes when he whirled around and pulled my gown up, exposing my panties and bare chest. Oddly enough his sudden action didn't embarrass me at all, I just felt hot under his gaze until he spoke. "Don't ever apologize to me. I let this happen. I should be the one in this bed-" Crona slicing him across the chest as he stood in front of me flashed across my eyes "I should be the one with this scar."
His hand drifted across the scar, the source of all the pain I had been feeling, still finely pulled together with stitches. A gap curving just below my left breast, and extensively down my side. And while I should be far more concerned with the giant wound I was seeing for the first time. Certain areas of my body tingled with anticipation at his hand being so close to my breast. My thoughts I must confess, were less than pure.
He pulled his hand away, allowing my gown to fall back into place. "It's probably better you never remember my name. It's my fault this happened to you. My fault you're in this hospital bed-"
I cut him off. "You've been in this same spot before, after Crona. You can't always be the one taking all the risk." A flash of me by his side, A flash of the shame I use to feel over seeing his scar. "How do you think I feel when it's you that's injured!" I was screaming, when I wasn't even sure where the argument came from.
My sentence distracted him though. "Maka, how much do you remember?"
"As far as I know, everything up to the events that caused this wound, but… of you just flashes here and there. Things you were saying brought some memories back."
He seemed to consider this before returning to his previous thoughts. "You just can't apologize." He said as he leaned forward to kiss my forehead. His lips lingered there, his breath tickling my skin before pulling away.
He pulled me from bed, supporting my six months' worth of deteriorated muscle as he handed me some pain medication, without speaking, and directed me to a nearby dresser. Which I learned contained a fresh change of clothes, and a few books.
"I've been reading to you." Soul shyly admitted, looking away before he scooped the clothes out. "Can you dress yourself or do you need my help?"
The thought of him completely undressing and dressing me again, made my knees weaker than they were already. "I can do it!" I spouted, before snatching my clothes and doing my best to briskly walk to the bathroom, located inside the small hospital room. Unfortunately my brisk walk came out as a slow stumble, which was clearly unconvincing to Soul because he stayed a few steps behind me in-case I might fall. Much to his dismay, I slammed the bathroom door in his face before he could further protest my actions. The bathroom was tiny, just a toilet and a sink about a foot apart from each other, the mirror however stopped me dead in my tracks. I looked nothing like myself. I untied the gown and let it fall to the floor. What once had been tight muscle under tan skin, was now pale with the protrusion of bones. I could see all my ribs, along with my hip bones sticking out. While it wasn't horrendous, I went from looking like a professional athlete to a super model, it shocked me, causing me to gasp. Not to mention my face just seemed tired. I allowed my fingers to trace the puffy wound that trailed so far across my body, and only had the desire to hide it from Soul's eyes. I could tell he was hurting, physically could feel the ache through the string tugging on my chest. I quickly got to work changing my clothes, snapping a bra around my chest and slipping on a t-shirt, which appeared to be Soul's, over my body. I went to pull the supplied pants up when like an idiot I managed to get tangled in them, and plop over with a bang. Slamming my head into the wall, leading to Soul bursting into the room to find my pants half way up my legs and me leaning forward rubbing my head.
"Are you alright, what happened?" He frantically announced as he launched himself to my side. Unsure of where to place his hands, they wavered about in the air.
"I'm fine just-" I muttered as I wiggled the pants the rest of the way up my legs. "Give me a second.
"Did you bump your head, idiot."
"Hey!" I puffed in indignation. I'd been in a hospital bed for six months give me a break. I reached my hand up to chop his smug head, but my force was clearly not what it had use to be considering he ignored me completely as he went to smooth my hair back down.
"Looks like you need to get back in training mode, Maka." He joked, but his smile didn't reach his droopy eyes. He stood and offered a hand to me, hiking me from the ground and into his chest in one swift motion. It was warm there, and my body instinctively laced my arms around his hips, burying my face within his chest. He tensed for a moment, before his arms too wrapped around me.
"Maka…" He breathed into my hair.
"Does it bother you? It does, doesn't it, seeing me like this…" I trailed off, afraid to look up at him, I only could tell his shift in emotions by the way his body reacted to my words. Recoiling from me, ever so slightly, like he was unworthy to be there.
"What do you mean exactly?" He spoke after a moment had passed.
"I know I didn't used to be this… frail. And I have a feeling you blame yourself for whatever it is that happened. And while I don't know how I ended up like this. I do know you're the reason I'm not in that hospital bed right now. Your voice is the voice that trailed me back here, and I don't believe you would have been able to do that, if any part of me resented you for how I ended up there to begin with." I wasn't entirely sure he heard every word I was saying as seeing how I was hiding my face against his chest.
He squeezed me tighter as if I was going to disappear, which while it felt comforting to my aching body, the string in my chest twanged with pain. "It's still my fault." He spoke so quietly I almost couldn't hear as he turned to lead me from the small bathroom we were incased in.
I didn't see any of my friends for the rest of the day, and as we headed back outside and to the apartment, I realized it was quite dark outside. Guess everyone's asleep. Another fun thing I learned on our way back, was he happened to live on the top floor of the apartment building, which meant lots of stairs. Stairs I was currently staring at, dauntingly. Without a word Soul scooped me up bridal style and started his way up the stairs, like he knew I'd never admit I couldn't make it and would have killed myself trying. Maybe he did know these things though.
Regardless, I protested ignoring the heat that spiked in my groin every time he touched me. And being this close to his body, the feeling was almost intoxicating. "I can walk my own self up the stairs!" I wiggled about in his arms, full heartedly trying to break free.
His only response was a very doubting look, which involved a raised eyebrow and a spiky toothed smirk. "Do you remember where you lived?"
The question took me back and I stopped squirming. "Well, while I was in a coma in whatever dream world I was in, I lived with my papa. But that doesn't feel right now and as seeing how DWMA students live with their weapon partner, I assume that I then lived with you. However, I don't remember this apartment building at all, I remember another, so I'm unsure."
He paused for a moment and his facial expression displayed he was mulling over what he should say. I could read him very well for someone I remembered nothing about, aside from some spotty memories of the horrendous wound he'd received from Crona. He finally decided to speak, breaking me from my thoughts. "We did live together when we were both students at the DWMA. However, when we graduated, we continued to live together, just in a different apartment as seeing how we weren't students anymore and you didn't want to go home to your father. Of course, Blair followed along too."
"Blair!" She'd slipped my mind. "How is she?" I spoke just as he sat me down to open the apartment door.
"Oh, same as ever." He was interrupted by said witch running across the room towards us, full speed. Unlike my papa however, she took my current physical state into mind before tackling me to the ground.
Instead, she shifted into her cat form, landing excitedly in my outreached hands. "Maka you're back! Soul's been sooooo lonely since you were gone. I was so worried; he didn't even have the energy to fend me off! If he wasn't by you, he was just locked in your shared room, surrounded by all the memories of you." She purred, rubbing against my face. Shared room?
"Blair." Soul spoke up sharply. "Maka doesn't exactly remember everything." I could tell he was hiding something from me. Everyone was, like they were afraid of jarring my memory.
Blair's tail twitched. "Well, I guess me and Maka will just get to have a sleep over then! I have so many things to catch you up on! I've been dating your father you know."
I dropped her to the ground as she gave an offended gasp. "Blair, I love you, but I in no way want to hear about my papa's sex life." I shuffled like a zombie through the living room to the door at the end of the hallway, past what was clearly Blair's room, and into the much more inviting landscape of Soul's. Or I guess our room. I could hear them speaking to one another, but my body, even though I had just woken up from a coma, was too exhausted to care. I stripped off my pants and shoes, and faceplanted into the bed, located in the middle of the room. Worming my body to the right side of the bed, I took in my surroundings.
The right side of the bed had clearly been mine, considering the stack of hardbacks located on the nightstand beside it, the only indication I had been gone was the slight layer of dust atop them. A picture of me and Soul wrapped up in one another lay beside the lamp. Hints of whatever life we had together were scattered across the room, from the shared dresser to the shared bed. Had we been dating? We clearly had, there's no way any of this would make sense otherwise. But why is everyone dancing around it then? There was a keyboard on the opposing side of the room, half written on music sheets spread about the seat. The walls were a burgundy red, the sheets a calm cream. I noticed with embarrassment that a small stack of unopened condoms rested on the table beside Soul's half of the bed, but I also saw a letter there, with my hand writing.
Just as I leaned over to read it, Soul appeared in the doorway. "Hey."
His worn eyes drug over me, and I realized I was propped atop of his bed, our bed, in nothing but his t-shirt and my underwear. I didn't want to move. I wanted him to look at me. I didn't speak and he continued. "I can sleep on the couch tonight if you-"
"No!" I hadn't meant to yell, but the idea of him anywhere other than next to me currently felt alarmingly wrong. I could feel a happy tug on the string in my chest, saw his face lighten.
"Okay," he moved to turn off the light. I watched the shadow of him in the darkness, pulling the clothes from his body. Coming to the bed in his boxers, I heard him sweep his bedside table into a drawer below.
His body inched into the bed as I got under the covers, he made sure to stay on his side. Carefully keeping his body away from me as if I or he might break at the touch. I could feel his tension through the mattress. "Soul?"
"Yes?" His face turned towards me, the dim light of the street outlining the furrow of his brow.
"We were dating weren't we… the pictures on the wall, the shared room…" My voice drifted off, I was sure of the answer, but afraid of the question.
He was quiet, uncertainty shone through the string attached to my chest. I wanted to rub the worry lines from his face, but something told me to give him a moment. And so, a moment passed with only the sounds of a sleeping cat drifting from the next room between us. I shifted closer, my hand grazing his. Sensing his tension, I wrapped my fingers through his and he gripped them tightly. "Soul, it's okay. You can tell me things; I'm not going to break."
He was silent for another moment before responding, "Yes. We were, we had been for a long time."
I didn't like his use of past tense; I rolled towards him, the movement pulling my stitches, causing me to wince. I slid my free hand across his bare chest, the inviting warmth of it pulling me closer. I pressed my face into his shoulder as I spoke. "I hate this. I hate that I don't remember. It's like, my body remembers you, but my mind just has this empty hole. This gap that aches when you aren't there. Every little movement you make, I can read it through a tug in my chest. I want you to touch me, be near me, but no matter how well my body remembers you, my mind just pulls up blanks. It's unsettling, eerie, almost like I'm in a dream."
I felt his head roll towards me on the pillow we were now sharing. "Maka."
I didn't want to look at him, I could feel my face flush with embarrassment at what I had said. His spare hand ever so lightly landed upon my cheek, trying to coax me out of hiding. A shiver went down my spine.
"Maka, look at me." I tilted my head upward, peeking out from behind his shoulder, his eyes were intense, yet softly staring into mine. "Maka that pull in your chest, it's our soul's resonating, or at least trying to. Ours just pull a little more strongly than most."
He smiled at me, in a way that made his eyes kinder, but worry could still be found there as well. I leaned into his hand and he brought his lips to my forehead again. "I love you." A flash of Soul, younger, more lean and less muscle. Scrambling for words, trying to tell me what his soul already had been for years. A flash of a kiss on the stairs, against the wall, in a pool, a hotel. All with increasing urgency. A flash of us hand and hand.
"I know." Was all I could manage to say. The tug in my chest felt stronger, a more constant pressure, but still with an ebb and flow. I pulled my body closer to him, wanting to solidify the pull of our souls, wanting to know what he knew as his arms wrapped around me pulling me even closer, like he was afraid I might disappear. My head rested across his chest, my eyes being tempted to close by the steady pace of his breathing. His chest rising, and falling, rising, falling, rising and soon I drifted to sleep.
