Disclaimers: I do not own Death Note
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A tall boy wearing all black writes quickly in a black book, a sinister look to his face that suited his in his leather clothes.
'Who will remember when I'm gone? ...' he thought.
...Will you, L?
...Will you, Matt? ...
...Will you, Near?
...That damned Near...
He thinks he's better than me...
...I wish I could kill him!
...Yet I...
...God!!!
...Why am I always second to that bastard?!
...I deserve to be best!
ME!!...
... Why, Near?
...Why did you have to leave me?
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...There it is again...
...The silence...
...That's how it was too, when I was in the same fucking room as him...
...Him...
...Why is he the best...?
...I'm older...
...Taller...
...Better...
...Aren't I?
The boy sighs. 'I hate him...
...I HATE HIM!!!' he says, breaking down in tears.
...Why?...
...Do you really deserve to be the best, Near?
...Will I allow you to live in your own happy little damned world as I wallow in self pity?
...Never...
...As long as I will live, I will NEVER let you win...
...You'll never see the weakness in me, Near...
...Never...
...Yet...
...I have to confess something to you...
...Do I have...
What it takes to tell you? ...
...Will I live long enough to tell you?
...Should I let you live?
...What has my self hatred done to me?...
...No...
...I'm not wrong...
...You have to die, Near...
And I will be the one to kill you...
...Me...
...Damn!...
...Why am I hesitant?!
...Write, pen!
Write, damn it!...
...Near...
...I just want to tell you...
...Tell you...
...What if there was...
...Something more to us?
...Did I actually...
...Love you?...
...NO!!
I can't love HIM!...
I hate him!...
...The way he twirls his hair...
...His pale body...
...His thin fingers...
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...His intelligence...
...Why won't you just let me be the best for once?!
...Is it just something you do to make me feel...
...Lower than you?
...Did you want to make me feel that you were my friend?
...Why won't you let me win?...
...Maybe...
...Just maybe...
...I wouldn't have to...'
The boy's pen began to scribble the last few letters.
'Just maybe...
...I wouldn't have to...'
The boy's pen fell, his body along with it. He etched for the pen, his body weak.
...Is this you, Near?!
...Are you doing this?!
The boy spits blood.
...Damn you, Near...
...I knew I couldn't trust...
...You...'
The boy's head drops.
He wakes up in total darkness, his body motionless. He felt as if he were floating in air. But there was darkness all around him, eating him, engulfing him, suffocating him.
'...Look what you did to me, Near...
...You bastard...
...Damn you...
...Damn you...
...I wish I could just see you again...
...At least then...
...I could hold you...
...Without the memories...
...The memories...
...Of my death...
...I'll never get to see you...
...In Heaven...
...Will I?
...Why is that?
...Oh yeah...
Because...
...I killed...
...I murdered...
...I destroyed lives...
...Lives that were once special to someone...
...Was I special to someone?
...Was I special to you, Near?
I wouldn't want to be anyway...
...I hate you...
...I hate what you do...
...How you do it...
...And why you do it...
...I hate everything about you, Near...
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I'm sorry, Near...
