The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest... Pirates?

Summary: What would happen if the Avengers met the Straw Hat pirates? Hilarity ensues at this fateful meeting. Crackfic, total immature-ness. Obvious AU! I don't own One Piece!

Format: Stuff.

Rating: K! Not really. It's a T, just to be safe.

Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece or the Avengers - I assure you, if I did, I would be very rich indeed. And I probably spend ten hours a day (at least) writing fanfictions!

The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest... Pirates?

"Meat." Luffy yawned widely. The man in front of him glared at them all. What a strange group of people... A teenager wearing a straw hat, a swordsman with three damn swords, an orange-haired girl with a strange tattoo, a young man with a strange nose, a reindeer wearing a red hat with a cross on it, a blonde man with weird eyebrows, a blue-haired man with a silver nose... and a skeleton. With an afro. There was another seemingly normal person, a woman, wearing a purple suit and hat. Nick Fury sighed.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm hungry." The boy with the straw hat gave the director of S.H.I.E.L.D a huge grin. His mouth was practically covering his whole face. "And I eat meat when I'm hungry. Sanji cooks for me. Well, us. Everyone. Mina. My crew. My nakama."

"And what's that meant to mean?" Nick raised an eyebrow. "Oh, never mind," he sighed. "I'd like your names, please."

"I'm Monkey D. Luffy!" The boy in the straw hat exclaimed loudly. "That's Zoro..." Luffy pointed to the green-haired swordsman who was, at this moment, shaking his head in despair and groaning at Luffy's annoying attitude. "C'mon guys, introduce yourselves!"

"Hey, crap-director. I'm Sanji. I used to work at the Baratie, the best sea restaurant in the whole of the North, South, West and East Blues!" The blonde man was smoking a cigarette, staring lazily at everybody seated at the table.

"I'm Nami. I'm from Cocoyashi village. I'm good at steali- I mean, I'm good at... Never mind." The orange-haired girl motioned for Usopp to start, which he did willingly.

"The name's Usopp! I'm the bravest warrior on the seas! Everybody knows about me!" The man with an extraordinarily long nose crowed unconvincingly, puffing his chest out although his knees were shaking uncontrollably.

"I... I'm Chopper. I'm a doctor." The reindeer sat straight in his chair, barely looking over the top of the interrogation table. "I was taught by Doctor Hiriluk and Doctorine Kureha."

"I'm Robin. That's all there is to know." The woman with the purple suit was speaking, her face carefully neutral, eyes boring into Fury's one eye as he glanced at her.

"I'm Franky! Yeah!" The blue-haired man smiled and struck a pose. Fury couldn't help noticing that he was wearing a speedo.

"I'm Brook! I have pale skin! But wait, I don;t have skin! Hoo hoo hoo!" The skeleton laughed. Zoro glared at the skeleton man.