Extreme Truths

The fact that Kakashi's father had committed suicide was an extreme truth.

The fact that Kyuubi was sealed inside Naruto was an extreme truth.

The fact that Uchiha Mikoto had been half deaf was an extreme truth.

The fact that Itachi had massacred his clan was an extreme truth.

But Itachi was the sole survivor of a less…horrible truth, but it was extreme to say the least.

At least, it was to Sasuke.

15 years ago

5 year old Itachi sat at the table, absently listening to his parent's rambling.

"How about Naruto…that's a cute name." Mikoto asked, looking through the baby book.

Fugaku poked his food, "No."

"…you've said no to the last twenty names, are you even listening to me anymore?"

"No."

"…do you want or baby to be strong?"

"No."

Mikoto, being a hormonal pregnant woman, growled at him and her nails dug into the table.

Fugaku chose that moment to shove a spoonful of green looking liquid into his mouth.

Itachi looked at his moody mother, and then at his green-faced father.

Fugaku made a gurgling noise and then said, "Uh, this sauce is gay."

Itachi was surprised; his father rarely ever said anything derogatory

like that.

Mikoto lit up.

"Sasuke? That's it!"

Fugaku looked at his wife, still feeling ill, "No, I said this sauce is gay."

"I know! Sasuke is such a wonderful name!"

Mikoto lifted herself up and walked away happily, "Ooh, I'll go tell the Uchiha elders that I have chosen a name!"

Fugaku and Itachi sat in an odd silence.

"Father…why did mother think you said Sasuke?"

Fugaku looked at the bowl of food in distaste, "Your mother is a bit deaf in both ears…"

Itachi said nothing.

"Not a word of this to your brother, Itachi."

"…of course father."

15 years later.

Itachi had Sasuke held against the wall, using Mangekyou Sharingan.

Naruto thought about attacking Itachi but…Sasuke started screaming some weird things.

"My name was not…!"

"No…mother was not deaf!"

"That sauce was not gay it was…it was…!"

After Itachi was done, Sasuke passed out.

Itachi sighed, "Even after training with that snake…he is still not worthy."

He turned to his left-

"…Naruto-kun?"

Naruto had tears in his eyes, face was red, and he was holding his stomach.

Laughing.

Kisame, who Itachi thought had left, was simple standing behind Naruto patting the boy's back, telling Naruto to breathe.

Itachi glared at Kisame.

Kisame only grinned, "Hey, nobody deserves to die of laughter."

Itachi said nothing.

Kisame grinned once more and began to walk away.

As Itachi and Kisame left, they heard a feeble, "Heheh, thanks shark dude."

"No problem, Kyuubi-brat."

Itachi rolled his eyes.

Later

Sasuke woke up to laughter.

He was still in the room that Itachi had found him.

He found Naruto crumpled on the floor, giggling.

"Naruto?"

Naruto stopped giggling and looked at him.

"Dear god, the sauce is gay!"

Naruto snorted and then began to laugh.

Sasuke turned white.

Itachi was going to die.

Killing his family was one thing, but making fun of his name?

Unacceptable.

The End

The Queen of Ramen

Ramenism

…I totally think this is what actually happened,

gigglesnort