A/N: ok so I wanted to do this because the song is a new favorite of mine :] I hope you all like it! It's a Niley btw
Song: Not Meant to Be by Theory of a Dead Man
Disclaimer: I own nothing
The view is always the same, but also so much different every time I get here. Here being our old spot, underneath the big oak tree, on the top of the tallest hill we could find when we were thirteen. We used to do so much up here, all of my memories of this place, man there are so many, were all of him and I. We went here when my grandfather died, when he got diabetes, when I released my first album, when they had their first big break, it was all discussed up here. But now I look around and I can remember the times we started to fall apart. We drifted more and more, we started fighting, and I never liked fighting in the first place, we basically made it into a rut where "sorry" couldn't cure it, and nothing worked.
It's never enough to say I'm sorry
It's never enough to say I care
But I'm caught between what you
Wanted from me, and knowing
If I give that to ya
I might just disappear.
I always felt like I didn't compare when I was around him. He was the closest you could get to perfect, his only flaw, finding flaws in others. He never directly told me to change, he said he loved me the way I was, but it was always implied. He wanted someone who was more reserved, less "speak their mind no matter what" type of person. So that's what I tried to be, and that was our first mistake, it made "us" disappear.
Nobody wins when everyone's losing
Oh, it's like
One step forward and two steps back
No matter what I do you're always mad
And I can't change your mind,
At one point we were just flat out getting no where. Every time things would be good there would be some thing that would come along and wreck it all. Our fights became so stupid that there was never a winner or a looser. We'd forget what we were fighting about after a few hours of being mad, and that worked for so long. But I guess we were like a rope, we could only be tugged on so many times before we snapped.
Oh, it's like
Trying to turn around on a one way street
I can't give you what you want
And it's killing me and I, I'm starting to see
Maybe we're not meant to be
We were stuck, I couldn't give him what he wanted, or what he deserved. That it's self killed me. it seemed like I couldn't do anything right, everything that I did backfired. I was no longer enough and that was what hurt the most, I saw it coming. I realized that we were falling apart but I couldn't do anything.
It's never enough to say I love you
No, it's never enough to say I try
It's hard to believe that's there's
No way out for you and me
And it seems to be,
The story of our life
We fell apart, slow at first. It started with the little fights, that soon got bigger. We went from five hour phone calls to three word text messages. But the hardest blow was the "I love you's" that are still waiting for an answer. It wasn't enough, and with the love we once had, I couldn't believe that there was no escape from the inevitable break up.
Nobody wins when everyone's losing
It's like one step forward and two steps back
No matter what I do you're always mad
And I can't change your mind, oh
It's like trying to turn around on a
One way street. I can't give
You what you want and it's killing me
And I, I'm starting to see
That maybe we're not meant to be
I let my eyes wonder around the hill I am currently sitting on. I can see why we picked this place, the sunset was so clear here. The colors painted themselves across the sky and, I don't know It just always felt right here. Even now that times are different I still feel safe here as I reminisce.
There's still time to turn this around
Should we be building this up
Instead of tearing it down
But I keep thinking
Maybe it's too late.
The minute we broke up I started to think of every way to get him back. I wanted to run back into his arms, I didn't think I was too late. I was wrong, when I turned around to try and go back, he was already gone, and I was alone. Another mistake to add to our list was the fact that nothing was ever fixed, just built on failure. Now all of the unsaid words linger in the think air. It's too late.
It's like one step forward
And two steps back,
No matter what I do
You're always mad
And I, can't change your mind, oh
It's like trying to turn around
On a one way street
I can't give you what you want
And it's killing me and I,
I finally see,
Baby we're not meant to be
We were done, and I finally excepted it. I still love him, but its time I found my feet planted on the ground and moved on. I'll always be there for him, it's a hard thing not to do after we were together for so long. One day, I know we'll be back together, and then, that time it will be forever. We were just too young and too much in love. I needed to be reassured that sometimes, and I remembered something I wish I didn't forget. I turned around and faced the tree, I had the memories of a thousand days in it. Along with the writing of Nick Gray himself.
It's like one step forward,
And two steps back,
No matter what I do
You're always mad,
And I, Baby I'm sorry to see,
Maybe we're not meant to be
That day when I stated my walk down the hill I turned and saw the tree with the words carved into it, "NJ + MC Forever and always" and I knew life was going to come full circle.
A/N: ok so I know its not my best but I tried. and also I know the end doesn't follow the song but I wanted a hopeful ending.
please review, I am SO self conscious of this one and some feed back from you all might help.
