Hey, guys, like I said before, THIS IS NOT A REMAKE OF NEW MOON. nor is this a one-shot.
it seems pretty depressing now, but i promise it'll get better.
the title really means something that may not seem apparant just yet...
I looked outside my airplane window and tried to become immersed with the clouds..I was failing. Greatly.
Just then, my sleek black phone vibrated in the pocket of my jeans. Without even looking, I knew it was Alice. I didn't answer.
I didn't have to be psychic like her to know what she was going to say.
"EDWARD! What the hell is wrong with you? Okay, I know Bella is….gone…but you can't behave so irrationally!" she would say. I could practically hear her say it.
HOW could I act rationally, when the love of my life is dead?
Dead.
That's all I can really think about right now. That horrid word: Dead. That's what I will be in a few hours. Dead. Dead. Dead.
I imagine it as smoke fading away, but still there. Its as if the word is a ghost of what was but not longer is. Just like my Bella. Who is gone…and will be gone…forever.
Ah, Bella, why must you be so foolish? You tell me to never leave….to never hurt myself, but look at you! You went and damn jumped off a bridge!
I gripped the armrest of my chair a little too tightly and a piece broke off in my hands. I looked at the passenger sitting next to me.
A lady, crinkled and old sat snoring, her delicate face perched on top of a sleeping old man's shoulder.
My Bella would never grow to be that old. Nor would she have another to grow old with her to that age. I felt a sharp pang in my stomach when I realized that even if she grew to be as old as the lady next to me, I would never be that old man. Ever.
I would be forever the teenager.
My phone vibrated in my pocket again. Damn Alice. I took it out of my pocket to turn it off, when I got a glimpse of the caller ID. It was not Alice.
It was Jacob Black. What the hell did he want?
I flipped open the phone and, as quietly as I could (so as to not wake the old couple beside me), muttered a curt hello.
"Well, hello, to you to, Leech." He said with a sneer.
"What do you want, Black?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady.
"Did you hear?" he asked, his voice cutting through me like knives.
"Hear what?" My jaw clenched; I knew where this was going….
"About Bella." He said. I could tell he was enjoying this. Damn dog! What was his problem? I thought that he "loved" Bella! Why was he being so composed about her death?!
"Yes." I said, still keeping my voice calm. "I know what happened. Is there a particular reason you called me?"
"No." he replied, a smile in his voice. "That was all. But you know…I could tell you about the time Bella and I—" I quickly slammed the phone shut. Any more talk of Bella and I would have to strangle something. I didn't want that thing to be the lady seated beside me.
After turning my phone off I looked back outside, trying to be immersed with the scenery. There was no scenery. My window was completely white from the clouds. So much for losing myself in the scenery.
I felt the old lady stir beside me. I did not look at her.
I heard her yawn and bend down to reach her handbag that was under the seat in front of her. During takeoff, the bag fell back to the front of the seat and the old lady could not reach it.
"May I?" I asked the lady, looking in her general direction, but not at her. She sat back, upright, in her chair. I reached down and pulled the bag out with ease and handed it to her.
It was at that moment that I looked at her face. At her eyes.
Oh how I wish I hadn't. Her eyes were just the same shade as Bella's chocolate brown. She smiled at me and said, "Thank you, son." I attempted to smile back, but I think I failed because the old woman then said. "Dearest, something is troubling you. What is wrong?" The poor thing…he looks heartbroken.
I shook my head, refusing to look back into those deep brown eyes. Even though I couldn't see her face, I could tell she was skeptical. "Dearest, it is always better to let it out." Maybe, talking about it will help. Oh—I do hope I do not seem nosy…
I looked back into those deep brown eyes and I couldn't look away. Those were my Bella's eyes. "I…lost a loved one..." I said, with much difficulty.
Her face crinkled up as she put on a face of pity. I could almost hear her skin crinkling. Ah, a very very loved one, I can see...
"Dearest, I am so sorry." She said. And, unlike most people, she meant it.
"But don't worry, things will get better for you…I promise." Yes. Because I am going to kill myself. Oh, dear, he looks pretty shaken up…I do hope he's not going to try anything.
I gave the old lady a sad, knowing smile. "I wish it would."
She took my cold hand in hers. She didn't seem to notice the temperature. "Really, dear. When God closes one door, he always opens another one. You just wait and see…"
As I walked out of the airport and into a taxi, I disposed of my phone in the nearest trashcan. There. Now no one could reach me.
"Where to?" asked the anorexic driver. He was smoking a cigarette and the smell burned my sensitive nose. "Volterra" I said, looking back out the window.
Dont worry peoples I like edward just as much as the next person, so don't freak out on me....
this story is going to take on an unexpected twist...
WELL, please READ AND REVIEW!
i love it when people review. reviews make me happy. a happy writer makes a better story faster.
3 Twilightsagaholic
