A/n hello all, here is a little one shot I wrote as a response to last nights episode and my desire to slap Danny silly.
Disclaimer: Don't own anything recognizable.
Lindsay stood on the roof watching the sun lower itself over the horizon. The reds, golds and pinks should have been beautiful, but her eyes could only see Danny's face and the misery he refused to share with her. She blinked her eyes against the tears that were threatening. She should go home to her own apartment and start to rebuild her shattered life, but couldn't make her feet turn and walk back to the roof access door. Her inability to leave the lab was scaring her because there was a part of her that wished the door to the roof would open and Danny would come up behind her and put his arms around her. He would kiss her neck and whisper that he was sorry, that he was ready to confide in her, that he was ready to let go of his guilt over Ruben Sandoval's death. She waited and it didn't happen. Tears didn't just threaten; they fell in a flood as the sun went down.
The door opened behind her and she heard approaching footsteps. Her heart was in her throat pounding so hard she couldn't breathe. One hand fell on her shoulder. The warmth of the touch made her cry harder and so did the voice behind her.
"Hey kiddo…"
"Hi Stella," She gasped out.
"No one seemed to know where you were. I wanted to tell you that we found Austin's mom, but I can see that there is something -"
Lindsay turned around and threw herself into the older woman's arms. "Hey…. What happened Linds?"
It all came pouring out while Stella hugged her. "I don't know what to do." She drew back and wiped angrily at her eyes with one hand. Stella gave her a handkerchief from her jeans pocket.
"Thanks…." She turned back to the sun, which was completely down. Purple veils of darkness were falling and it was getting chilly.
"I think you need to go talk to him." Stella said
"I want to… if I thought it would do any good." She swung around to face her friend again and her eyes blazed. "I've tried for weeks to be there for him, but he keeps pushing me away."
"Like you pushed him away a year ago," Stella reminded her.
Lindsay went red with anger. "That was different," She shouted.
"How…You put him through hell for months because of your personal problems and grief. How is what he is doing any different?"
"It's different because it's Danny. Do you know what the girls in the lab told me the first day I started here?"
"No… but I can imagine." Stella grinned, despite her friend's predicament.
"They told me that Danny Messer was a player. He was famous for doing anything it took to get a woman in his bed and then he'd move on."
"So that's what you think is going on here."
Lindsay stamped her foot like a spoiled child. "I know it. I thought that because he came to Montana last year and helped me through a terrible time, that he really loved me. We were so happy for months. I thought that maybe the girls in the lab were wrong. I thought that I had changed that bad boy into a good guy. I was wrong.
"Lindsay… I think you're jumping to conclusions. Danny's a guy. They deal with pain differently than we do."
"I know that Stella, but you don't - oh I can't explain it to you." She pushed away from the railing and headed to the door of the roof.
"Lindsay, I think you should talk to him." Stella insisted.
Lindsay turned around again to face her friend. "Last year Danny and I were best friends teetering on the edge of something more when I got the call to testify for my friends that were killed. Now… we're lovers or girlfriend and boyfriend, or whatever. I don't even know anymore. I thought he loved me. I thought we had something special. How can I trust that when he pushes me away because he feels guilty about Ruben's death?
"He'll talk to you in time Lindsay. You have to be patient."
"No… there's something more going on with him. I told him I was falling in love with him and he didn't even look at me. How am I supposed to read that? "
"I don't know honey… I'm sure that if you just talk to him -"
"No… it's over… I'm going home to pick up the pieces if I can."
Stella sighed and followed her friend down the stairs. Lindsay was making a mistake, but there was no way to convince her of that, not now.
"Stella…" Lindsay asked as they went down the stairs.
"What kiddo…"
"Would you do me a favor?'
"Yes…"
"If Danny comes back and begs me for another chance, will you remind me of how I felt today? I don't want to hurt like this again. You know what they say, fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me."
Stella sighed again, but said, "Yeah… I'll remind you."
They got to the bottom of the stairs and Lindsay hugged her again. "Thanks…"
Lindsay left her friend staring at her and frowning. Stella was wrong. Something else was going on with Danny besides his grief. She could feel it in her bones. There was no going back from what a bullet had done to an innocent boy and their relationship. It had severed it as effectively as the bullet had severed flesh and blood vessels in Rueben.
Now it was time to go home and escape into sleep. It would be time enough tomorrow to come back here and hold her head up high. She was Lindsay Monroe and she would survive.
