Author's Notes: I got the idea for this story while watching the 1987 movie He's My Girl, and the title is taken from Cute is What We Aim For's 'Sweet Talk 101'. This is my first Big Time Rush fanfic and I highly encourage constructive criticism. Please let me know what you think of the characterization. Also, this will eventually include slash, so if that's not your bag, consider yourself appropriately warned. Please enjoy. Oh, and it should be common knowledge, but just to cover all my bases: I do not own Big Time Rush.

The Fine Print

"Nothing like conditioning to remind you of how out of shape you are." Carlos Garcia announced as he plopped down onto the Knights' comfy sofa. It was a typical Friday afternoon for the foursome- hockey conditioning from 2:45 to 5:00 followed by hanging out at Kendall's house from 5:00 until whenever their mothers got worried. Logan Mitchell chimed in with:

"Yes, well, that's kind of why we do it, Carlos. The idea is to get us into gear for when hockey season rolls around." Logan had this habit of being incredibly sarcastic and Carlos was almost always defensive, so the two quickly began bickering as was typical for them.

Kendall, who usually mediated between the two, was busy making a pizza in the kitchen and James was mesmerized by whatever music video was on the television.

"You know, you sound really condescending for someone who was clearly lagging behind in practice today, Logan!" Carlos retorted.

"Condescending? Sounds like someone finally bought a thesaurus."

"Oh yeah? Well-"

Kendall entered the room, pizza in hand.

"Guys, guys-"

"Everyone SHUT UP!"

Carlos, Logan, and Kendall all turned to face James, his eyes glued to the TV.

Kendall didn't take kindly to being told to shut up in his own house. "James, what-"

"Shhh!"

From what Kendall could tell, it looked like an advertisement for some sort of contest. Upon realizing that that was indeed exactly what it was, he groaned. This wasn't the first time James had entered a contest like this and Kendall knew that just like with all the other contests, it wouldn't be the first time James lost. It seemed that Carlos and Logan were quickly drawing the same conclusion because Carlos asked, "Wait a minute, James- what is this contest for, exactly?"

If James noticed the wariness in Carlos' tone, he didn't acknowledge it. Instead he calmly replied:

"It's an all expenses paid two week trip for two to meet pop sensation, Pop Tiger's 'Hottest Teen Acting/Singing Heartthrob', Dak Zevon on the set of his latest movie. This is it, you guys. This is my chance- my springboard to fame!"

Carlos, Kendall, and Logan all exchanged nervous glances. This wasn't the first time they'd heard James' fame spiel in regards to some stupid contest.

Finally, it was Logan who broke through the awkward silence. "James…How is this contest any different than the ones before?"

"What do you mean?" James asked, clearly bewildered.

Times like these made Logan really hate being the smart one. The other three always forced him into being the bearer of bad news, the 'buzz kill', claiming his logic and superior explanatory skills made him the only option. He needed new friends. He really hated having to burst James' bubble.

"What I mean is that this is exactly what you said about MySpace's 'Send in an Audition Tape for a Chance to be on FOX's Glee' promotion. Kendall even filmed your audition tape to help support you.

"Yeah well, that contest was clearly rigged. Pop Tiger is running this promotion, and that magazine has never steered me wrong." James argued his mouth set in a straight, firm line.

"What about the contest to spot everything that was out of the ordinary in the April Fools episode of Degrassi for a chance to win a guest spot on the show? Carlos watched every episode of Degrassi: The Next Generation that Spring Break just to help you catch the mistakes. And don't lie. Pop Tiger was your justification for getting a mohawk in the sixth grade. Steered you wrong, it has."

James continued pouting. And that's when Logan decided he was going to have to bring out the big guns.

"You said once that you would never enter another contest."

Carlos' and Kendall's eyes went wide- they couldn't believe Logan was going there. From the expression James wore, he couldn't believe it either, but go there Logan went.

"Logan, don't!" James growled.

"I'm sorry James, but this is for your own good. When you lost the 'Win a Date with Nicole Scherzinger' contest you swore you would never enter another contest again so long as you lived."

With those words, Carlos found himself admiring Mrs. Knight's choice in wood flooring more intensely than he ever had before and it appeared as though Kendall had decided the pizza would really go better with some onion rings, as he retreated to the kitchen.

Logan and James were at a standstill. James had entered the 'Win a Date with Nicole Scherzinger' contest their freshman year of high school and losing was more than his fourteen year old heart could take. It was the most upset they had ever seen James aside from the time his parents divorced when they were ten. James had made them promise never to speak of the incident again and by breaking that promise Logan had just become Public Enemy Number One.

Just when it looked like James and Logan would never speak again, Carlos chose to intervene.

"Dude, you just broke the Bro Code." He said pointedly to Logan.

Logan's eyebrows reached his hairline. He couldn't believe that Carlos would betray him like that; taking James' side when all Logan was trying to do was help James by making him see reason.

James nodded, crossing his arms as he continued to glare at Logan. Seeing their reactions, Carlos turned to James before a second fight could break out between them.

"I saw that. Don't act like he doesn't have a point just because you're mad that he mentioned 'the incident'."

It was James' turned to scowl and be offended.

Carlos sighed. "Kendall, get back out here! You're better at resolving conflicts than I am."

Kendall popped his head out from the kitchen's doorframe. "Carlos, you're a middle child, shouldn't your environment prepare you for resolving conflicts?"

"I have sisters. The only arguments I can fix involve boys, borrowed clothes, or Barbies. Oooh, and make-up."

"And anecdotes like that remind me why I couldn't be happier that Katie's only ten, and that I won't have to be here when she gets to be make-up wearing, boy-dating age."

If Logan, who began gathering his things to leave, hadn't been in the midst of an argument with James, he would have brought it to Kendall's attention that what Carlos had told them was not an anecdote because it wasn't a specific account of him diffusing an argument over Barbies or boys or borrowed clothes. As it was, it was James who broke through Kendall's reverie.

"Hello? We're still here, and I'm still mad at Logan, who's running away because he can't deal with the fallout."

Logan tensed and stopped what he was doing completely.

"I can't deal with the fallout? I can't deal with the fallout?"

Carlos groaned. "Do you see why I asked for reinforcement?"

Kendall nodded. "Right. Hey hey! Break it up."

James and Logan stopped being at each other's throats for a moment to give Kendall their immediate attention.

"That's better. Now kiss and make up so that we can move on to more important things. Things like the pizza I just made and the Angelina Jolie movie Carlos has provided for us."

For a moment, neither of them made a move to do anything. Kendall motioned for them to hug it out.

Logan scoffed, glaring at Kendall all the while.

James rolled his eyes.

Kendall folded his arms. "We don't have all day, boys. The sooner you kiss and make up, the sooner we get to ogle Angelina."

"I'm sorry for mentioning 'the incident'." Logan's eyes were downcast and Carlos thought it sounded more like 'I'm moving into IKEA' but it seemed to appease James, who accepted the apology in stride and admitted: "You were only trying to help."

Kendall smiled. "Great! Now let's watch the movie."


Later that evening as he was browsing the web trying to get a head start on his weekend homework, Logan let his curiosity get the better of him. Looking up the details of the 'Two Dreamy Weeks with Dak' contest caused Logan to wonder whether arguing with James had been worth it. For all he knew, James would enter the contest anyway. It wasn't like he'd managed to make James promise that he wouldn't. Was it really so harmful for James to take a chance and enter?

Against his better judgment, Logan decided to enter James in the contest. He submitted the application once on the family computer, once on his personal laptop and even once through text message. Logan hardly ever used his cell phone and he texted even less, so the fact that he used it for the contest meant he was really feeling guilty.

Meanwhile James was sitting at home watching TV in his pajamas when the 'Two Dreamy Weeks with Dak' commercial came on again. James couldn't stop thinking about what Logan had said. Maybe he was right, maybe entering this contest wasn't such a good idea. He thought about not entering at all for a moment before he remembered that he was James Diamond. James Diamond took chances and he had an especially great feeling about this one.


It had been two weeks since the Dak debacle, as Logan preferred to think of it, when Carlos asked to borrow his phone.

"What's wrong with your phone?"

Carlos looked sheepish. "I'm currently between phones. I broke my last one waterskiing on vacation last month."

Logan sighed. Typical Carlos. "Fine, whatever. You're lucky I carry it with me for moments like this."

Moments like this meant staying after school. They were after school today working on their science project and had just decided to call it a day. If only Logan had remembered how 'curious' Carlos was. As it was, he was taken by surprise when Carlos asked him "Wait, what? You entered the contest you warned James about?" Logan didn't know what to say. He took a deep breath. "I-I was feeling really guilty about the fight, so I entered James in the contest."

Carlos smiled. "James must have thought that was really nice of you. I know I do."

"He doesn't know."

"What? Why not? I-"

"Carlos! Can you just call your family and give me my phone back?"

"Touchy, touchy." Carlos responded, eyebrows raised.


It was two weeks later that the 'Two Dreamy Weeks with Dak' promotion ended.

It was two weeks later and James Diamond had just received a very interesting letter in the mail.