"You're leaving again aren't you?" There was no accusation in her voice this time, not like there had been in the past. Of course he was going, he always did the moment they called. So she knew she should have expected it. Still she couldn't help hating it a little as well.
"It's important." He shrugged one shoulder and started toward the door, "Besides it won't take too long…" He might not have meant it as a lie, but they both knew it was. Whatever they wanted him for it would take a long time, he would come back covered with bruises and cuts and just when she started to think it might be over, they might be normal for just a little while something else would come up and he would be gone again.
"You should take a coat… it's raining." She watched the little beads of water roll down the window through his reflection, then blinking his image into focus took a second to examine the young man approaching the door. His slicked back hair wouldn't stay that way long in the rain, a few strands had already fallen into his brown eyes. He glanced at her quickly as he started to open the door. "And Yusuke…" She added suddenly, forcing herself to turn to him even though she didn't want to, "I'll miss you." The next words stuck in her throat, digging in to keep from being said. She didn't want to do this, but knew she had to, had known for a very long time now. Knowing that didn't make it any easier, everything in her screamed at her to stop there, to let it go, but the honest part of her, the realistic part deep inside knew she couldn't do this anymore, that things had changed.
Why did he have to smile at her like that? In her head she was screaming at him to stop, not to look at her with those big suddenly soft brown eyes, and before he could speak she made herself finish. "But I won't be here when you get back."
In the heartbreaking moment of silence that followed his eyes went from stunned to pained and she prayed that he wouldn't say anything. That he would just turn and walk out the door without a word. She knew it wouldn't be that easy when he fixed that half hearted grin on his face. "Come on Keiko, it won't be that long." At least he wasn't pretending he didn't understand that she was just going on a trip or something. Idly she wondered how long he'd known this was coming. When she didn't respond he continued on more hurriedly, "Look I know its bad timing and it's been a lot lately, but just give me a couple days and when I get back I'll make it up to you." Again she was silent, but when he flashed that smile she'd adored for so long Keiko couldn't help smiling back, "I've got to go, but I'll see you in a few days, I promise."
She waited until the door closed behind him to turn back to the window. "No you won't." She whispered, watching the dark haired figure vanish into the rain soaked streets for the last time. This time she was the one who had to go. Not because she wanted to. She longed to stay, but she couldn't ask Yusuke to stop doing what had made him who he was, what had saved her and the world countless times. Spirit world would always need him, would always call and Yusuke would always go to save them all. Keiko had lived with that knowledge for years, had accepted it and loved him all the more for it. And just as much as she couldn't ask Yusuke to stop she couldn't make the tiny person just starting to exist inside of her to live this lifestyle of worry and uncertainty. He hadn't stayed, hadn't looked back and Keiko wouldn't either… she couldn't let herself. "I can't keep going through this…"
XXX
He sighed and settled back into the chair, wondering when his mother and grandparents would climb out of the wooden things he'd heard the adults call coffins so they could go home. They'd been here for hours now; he was tired and didn't like the suit his other grandma had forced him into. It was tight and hot. And how did they know his mom was in one of those coffin things anyway? If she was and knew he was here she wouldn't have kept him waiting so long, not since he hadn't seen her for days now. Since the big truck had hit their car. He hadn't even been able to show her the blue cast the doctor at the hospital had put on his arm. He'd been waiting since his grandma Atsuko, at least she said she was his grandmother; he'd never seen her before a few days ago, had shown up and taken him to her house. She seemed nice, but he was ready to go home.
His arm hurt, and the cast was itchy even if it was a cool color. And they'd been playing the "funeral" game long enough that it was boring. What kind of game did you play by just sitting down and keeping quiet? No one had even told him the rest of the rules. How was he going to win if he didn't know how?
"Come on Kazuki, we can go now." The five year old blinked up at his grandmother. Did that mean they'd won? Or had he done something wrong and they'd lost? He didn't want to ask, it might be breaking the rules no one had told him.
"Is mom coming with us?" He asked finally as he jogged to keep up with the much taller woman leading him toward the door.
"No Kazuki, Keiko won't be coming with us."
He must have lost then. Maybe someone would tell him the rules and he could win his mother back next time.
