Prologue

Before I met you I used to dream you up

and make you up in my mind.

All I ever wanted was to be understood;

you've been the only one who could.


It all started with a game. Truth or dare, to be specific. And when asked to choose between the two, Madison Roberts always chose the first. Always. She had picked it when playing her very first game at her very first big girl sleepover and was forced into admitting she had a crush on the very-cute-but-also-very-shy boy in their third grade class. Over the years the sleepovers changed and the names of the boys they talked about changed, but the game itself never did. Madison just didn't see any reason in taking a dare; who knew what they could ask you to do? Dare you to call up the most popular girl in school and ask her if she really made out with Eric Thomson, the hottest kid in their seventh grade class? Dare you to walk right up to your crush and kiss him at your first high-school party? No thank you.

"Dare," Madison responded, crossing her legs and pushing her long bangs away from her face, bracing herself for whatever it was she would have to do. The girls sitting around her, her five closest friends, stared back at her, wondering if they could have possibly heard right. Because there was absolutely no way in hell that Madison just said that because that was so not something Madison would ever do. She was a straight-A student. She had been going out with the same guy since they were freshmen. She had been driving for a year and a half and hadn't yet gotten a ticket for running a light or speeding, unlike every other senior at her school.

"I want a dare," Madison repeated firmly, making it clear. Her response was certainly not because she wanted to do something as crazy as dance in the middle of her street with no clothing on. No, she chose a dare partly because she had had quite a lot to drink at the house-party she went to a few hours before and also because at that moment she could not stand the truth. The truth always seemed to be the best option, the easiest way, the most simple and risk-free. It no longer seemed like that, not ever since she found out that her long-time boyfriend; the guy she was planning on going to college with, the guy she was planning on marrying, for Christ's-sake, had been cheating on her. Cheating on her! Madison was so angry and shocked when she first found out, a few hours ago, at that party, that she went up to him and pulled him outside to talk, not even noticing that half of her classmates were watching as tears formed in her eyes, threatening to ruin the mascara and eye-liner that she had spent a half-hour putting on perfectly.

Madison certainly wasn't conceited, but she knew that her slim figure, tan skin, and piercing light-blue eyes stopped more than just a few guys in their tracks. And the ones who stuck around to see who she was behind that perfect smile and perfect body all fell for her determination and even her intelligence. This was what made Connor's cheating seem so horrifyingly mind-boggling. And also because up until that point, or the moment when he first kissed that whore Melissa Ryan, he was a taller, boy-version of Madison: comforting, dependable, and trustworthy. And so she stood outside on that humid, early summer night and listened to him as he tried come up with an explanation; an explanation that really made no sense at all. "I need something else, Mads; something different, something exciting," he had told her before she just couldn't stand looking at his pretty face any longer and ran back into the house, where she started to drink, one beer after another. If cursing was something Madison didn't like to do, drinking was something that Madison never did, but that was precisely the reason why she did it.

Madison woke up about eight hours after she chose to take the dare. She was sweaty, her hair was all over the place, she was tired, and her head felt like somebody had just hit it with a bat. Repeatedly. She snuggled out of her sleeping bag and went to sit up, but she just couldn't do it. It seemed like every muscle in her body was hurting, but more than any other it was her heart that was hurting, hurting because Madison found out the truth. And the truth was so much more than that Conner had been cheating on her for four months. The real truth was in what Connor said to her, which indicated that she was simply too boring. And Madison had always loved her life, but never once had she thought that it wasn't exciting, never once had she thought that she could be doing something greater. The sudden realization that she was living her life, but quite possibly not living her life made her want to throw up. Or maybe it was all those beers.

After taking a hefty dose of Tylenol and drinking three cups of almost-black coffee, Madison was able to stand up straight. Well, sort of. So her best, best friend since forever, Erica Myers, pushed her into the bathroom and threw a fabulously sexy-but-not-slutty fashionable outfit, as well as a bra and a pair of unsexy granny panties (but it wasn't like anyone would be seeing those, right?), in there as well. Twenty-five minutes later, when Madison was finished with her shower and fully clothed, her five friends pulled her out of the house and dragged her to the car, knowing that they were very, very close to being late. What were they late for? Well, actually, they were late for a meet and greet. Only three of them would actually be going to the meet and greet, since the other two hated the band and were just forced to attend the concert. It was probably not the best idea to leave late for a meet-and-greet and concert with a slightly hung-over friend, but it was too late now for rationalizations. Besides, a good story does normally come from these types of stupid actions, and the one you're reading now is a perfect example.

Madison's head might have been a bit foggy a few hours before, but standing on the meet-and-greet line was like getting a shot of a double espresso with a red bull, and now she was anxiously waiting to get to the front of the line. Although she was excited to meet her all-time favorite boy band ever (the Jonas Brothers-no, she was not a twelve-year-old, thank you very much), and in particular her all-time favorite attractive rockstar (Joe Jonas can rock, but more importantly, he has a rockin' body), she was also extremely nervous. Her anxiousness and nervousness actually proved a good distraction for Madison, completely steering her away from thinking about Connor and her new discovery of the wonders of chugging beer. And hopefully by the time Madison actually thought about what had happened it wouldn't matter anyway, since it was summer and we all know that summer is supposed to be exciting and awesome and the perfect time to find a significant-other (or at least an attractive good-kisser). Madison was so busy thinking about how nervous she was that before she knew it, it was their turn to meet the boys. So her two friends, Erica and Taylor, went in by Kevin and Nick, as planned, leaving the space in-between Nick and Joe for Madison. Yes, they did plan this because, you see, this was all part of the dare that Madison had asked for. After the usual quick-chat and name swap that occurs at these types of meet-and-greets, the photographer was ready to take the picture.

"Could you count-down for us, please, so I don't blink during the picture because I tend to do that," Erica said to the photographer, who was actually almost as hot as the boys. The hottie photographer nodded his head and asked if they were all ready. Nick put his arm on top of Madison's shoulder, but his hand was actually placed on Joe's. Joe however, being possibly flirty because Madison was probably better looking than most of the girls he had seen that day and actually around his age, put his arm around Madison's waist. Madison leaned into Joe a bit, waiting for the photographer. Everybody smiled and the photographer counted by sticking up his pointer finger first, then the second, and then right as he put up the third and took the picture, Madison leaned a bit closer to Joe and planted a small, but not too-small, kiss on his cheek. Joe jumped a bit, shocked that a fan actually had the guts to kiss him, and the photographer laughed. The girls all waved goodbye and Madison smiled one more time at Joe before taking out a piece of paper where she had written her cell-phone number and sticking it in the big pocket of his very thin v-neck t-shirt.

And that was Madison's first dare. It was amazing, really, that a girl who had been such a goody-two shoes her whole life was able to completely transform herself in less than twenty-four hours. And no, she didn't become an alcoholic- slut-groupie, but she did change from that dare. And I'm not going to spoil it right now because I have a whole story to tell, but I have to say that she was not the only one whose life changed from that dare. Care to take a guess who that was?


And not long ago I gave up hope, but you came along

and gave me something I could hold onto.

And I want you more than you could ever know.