Disclaimer: Dean, Sam, Ruby, Lilith and the Impala do not belong to us in any way. We are just playing with the characters. This story is written purely for enjoyment, with no profit of any kind expected, intended or desired. (co-written by CelineNaville and Mariamo)

Personal Demons

Chapter One

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Dean Winchester was in his cups. Not three sheets to the wind or piss drunk or any other colorful metaphor but definitely, solidly in his cups. He'd gotten ahold of Yeungling in the last New York town they'd been in and had made short work of the stuff by himself in the motel room in wherever the fuck he was and then started on the whiskey.

He felt distinctly lonely without Sam with him... was pissed at himself for feeling that way, since by his brother's absence, the sentiment was obviously not returned.

There was a gentle knock on the door. Dean peered out the peep hole, saw the long dark curtain of hair and the full lips. He cracked the door open, blocked the entrance with his broad shoulders and growled at her. "Ruby, what are you doing here?"

"That's nice. We need to talk."

"No," Dean retorted. "We really don't."

"We do if you still care about your little brother. But hey, if not, why should I care." Ruby shrugged and turned to leave.

Dean took the bait and cracked the door open farther, raised an eyebrow. "What did you do to Sam?"

Ruby looked back over her shoulder, raising an eyebrow. "Why would I do anything to Sam? I actually like him."

"Yeah. Sure you do, bitch."

"Oh I do." She smirked, in a deliberately annoying manner.

"Cut to the point, Ruby. I'm not in the mood."

"Seems to me you're always in a mood. So, are you going to invite me in?"

Dean glared at her. "No. You can tell me right here what the problem is. And I can tell you right here to fuck off."

"Charming. Okay. We'll stand here in the hall, where everybody and their uncle can hear us. And we'll let everyone hear about how your brother is going to kill someone."

Dean grabbed her arm attempting to yank her inside, gripping her tiny bicep in his hand, resisting the urge to crush it. He felt her body go with him and then suddenly hit an invisible force and bounce back.

Ruby recoiled with a muttered curse, looking pointedly at the salt line. "You really are stupid, aren't you, Winchester! Salt! You moronic son of a bitch."

Dean scuffed the line. "You have 10 seconds before I throw your ass out the window."

Ruby stalked past him, flipping her hair over her shoulder in an affronted manner.

"What do you want?" Dean watched her suspiciously, jaw tight. He blinked to clear his head.

"Well Dean..." Ruby propped herself casually against the wall. "You seem a little out of sorts?"

"Huh?" He scrubbed a hand over his face. "M not out of sorts. What do you want, Ruby? Last chance."

"Nor out of whiskey, by the smell." Ruby wrinkled her nose in distaste. "I suppose you aren't going to offer me a drink? No? Thought not."

"Yeah." Dean replied, agitated by her mere presence. "I got some holy water. Want some?"

"Umm no. I find it a little sharp on the palate. We need to talk about Sam."

"Okay, he rubbed the bridge of his nose. "What about Sam."

"He's bitten off more than he can chew."

"Funny. You don't look that big."

Ruby smiled at him sweetly, a malicious glint in her eyes. "Oh, now that's a whole other story."

Dean's green eyes turned hard, like a shard of cut glass."You bitch." He stepped toward her. "You whore! I knew it." The thought of Sam with her made his stomach clench. "You leave my little brother alone!"

"Your manners really are crap. Maybe I'd better just leave."

Dean grabbed her and slammed her into the wall, his whiskey breath in her face. "What. Do. You. Want."

Ruby hissed; Dean was repelled backwards at speed. "I'm going to say this once. You lay another finger on me, you bow-legged freak and I'm out of here! And it will be too late to help your little brother."

Dean staggered back from the force of the blow and caught his balance, gave her an uncowed glare.

"I didn't have to come here. I'm here because it's Sam."

Dean remained silent and waited for her to speak, though everything about his face and posture belied the calm. He wanted to kill her. Truly and deeply.

Ruby's gaze flicked up and down his taut body. "You know what... forget it. I'm going. You're not worth the trouble. You probably couldn't help save his ass anyway."

"Stop trying to manipulate me you skank. What is wrong with Sam?"

Ruby stepped away through the doorway. "Ask nicely, Dean."

Dean paused, his chest rising and falling with a repressed breath. He swallowed. "Ruby what's wrong with my brother?"

"That's better. Your brother is going after Lilith."

"What?" Dean shook his head. "Goddammit."

"I tried to stop him. But you know Sam."

"I bet you did." It was an accusation.

Ruby glared at him. "Of course I did! He's not ready yet. One day he'll be able to take her. Right now, it's a suicide mission. Use your brain. If I wanted him to go, I wouldn't be here!"

"He shouldn't be taking her on at all. He should let it go. I did my time. It's over."

"Tell him that. He's an adult. Over the age of consent. It's his call, ultimately. But he's not ready yet."

"I've tried but he doesn't listen to me much anymore." Dean's look was an accusation. The resentment palpable. The unspoken weight behind the words evident. "He doesn't listen to me because of you."

"Ahh." A smile curved Ruby's lips. "Are you feeling a little jealous there, sweetie?"

"Of what?"

"He's not responding quite so much to your controlling attitude perhaps?"

Dean but his lip. "Yeah cause you've gotten into his head."

Ruby's dark eyebrow curled dramatically upwards. "So… if someone got into your head, you'd abandon little Sammy?"

Dean ignored her, pulled his cell out of his pocket. Never taking his eyes off of her he dialed Sam's number, let it ring. It went to voicemail. Dean licked his lips. "Sam, man, call me." He hung up. "Of course not. But I'm not naïve like he is. I know better than to trust a demon."

"Don't be such a racist." Ruby smirked. She widened her stance. "Seems like right now he can trust me more than you. I'm here trying to help him. You're bitching about your hurt feelings."

Dean took a step toward her menacingly. "Don't."

"I warned you." She wagged a finger at him. "One more and I'm gone."

"Just tell me where he's headed and I'll go myself. And you can go back to doing whatever demon skank things you do."

"No. We go together or we don't go at all."

"Together?" Dean's voice was incredulous. "Are you kidding me?"

Ruby rolled her eyes. "You really are a bit slow aren't you? You can't find Lilith. I can sense Sam, you can't."

"Then why are YOU asking me along at all?"

"Because he just might stop if you ask him to. Because he's still doing this for you, you ass."

Dean looked vaguely smug. "So you don't have all the sway in him yet, huh?"

"I don't need sway. I just thought you might want to stop him getting killed. Demon here, remember? I can find him after death if I want to."

Dean's jaw went tight. The thought unsettling him in ways he didn't even comprehend.

Ruby put her hands on her hips, jutting her chest in Dean's direction. "I'm getting bored."

"So what do you propose we do?" Dean shrugged into his green jacket, grabbed his keys.

"I propose that unless you've learnt how to zap yourself from A to B, we get in that hunk of metal you call a car and drive."

"You think I'm gonna let you pollute my Baby?"

"Fine." Ruby turned on her heel and headed further from the door.

Dean bit his lip. His expression torn. Anxiety for Sam battling through his slightly muddled thoughts. "Where is he. Tell me where he headed."

She sounded bored. "North… and West a bit."

"Well that's precise." Dean frowned. "Thanks. You got a city?"

"We'll figure it out as we go. Finding someone with your senses doesn't usually provide a GPS location y'know. We head North and West. You can manage that? You can read a map can't you?"

Dean followed behind the click of her high heeled black boots, hating himself. He finally responded. "Get in the car."

The demon pulled open the Impala's passenger door, wincing at the rusty screech. "Gentlemen hold the door open. But you're not one of those, are you?"

"We do that for LADIES Which you are not last I checked."

"Damn straight, cherry pie. I'm not a lady." She smiled. "I have far too much fun."

"Yeah whatever." Dean recoiled. "Keep it to yourself." He started Baby, took a breath, trying to keep his discomfort under control. Ruby sitting in the passenger seat...in Sam's seat made him want to kill her.

He pulled out of the driveway onto the road and turned up the music, heading north.

"Is this car up to the trip?"

Dean answered gruffly. "Of course."

"Are you?" Ruby observed his clear discomfort with interest. Maybe this trip might be more fun than she'd anticipated.

He ignored the second question, fairly certain that he wasn't up to the trip. "She's up to anything, huh baby?" He patted the dash.

Ruby sighed. "You're talking to your car now? Great start."

Dean's shoulders tensed, stiff, rigid, every muscle signaling his dislike of her and his distrust of the situation he'd just willingly been drawn into.

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More soon…

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