hey this is my first story! disclaimer i don't own Glee or any of the songs that are added.
let me know what you think! :)
As I sit in one of the best coffee shops in New York city my eyes lazily graze the walls observing all the vintage posters and authentic autographs, while my fingers absent mindedly tapped out the beat to We Are Young.
It had been stuck in my head all day and apparently now I had decided was a good time to turn my table into a drum set and start up my solo. I quietly contemplated if possibly I should look into drumming while I waited for my two best friends.
It's crazy if someone had told me three years ago that the Unholy Trinity would be three of my closest friends today I would have straight up laughed in their face, oddly enough though it's true.
Brittany had followed my lead and applied at NYADA where she excels in dance and has even been making a name for herself as a choreographer. She's even landed a few small gigs running some steps for a few off Broadway shows, nothing big just enough to get her name out there.
Santana is currently making her way through her second year of law school at NYU. She and Brittany live together in a nice little two bedroom place in Chelsea, right between both schools. They are one of the most remarkable couples I have ever seen, they never have any petty fights and all it takes is a calming touch or word from Britt to get Santana to retract the claws.
The third member of the trio, Quinn is busy pursuing higher education in New Haven at Yale. Even though the little genius is so far away, we still manage to keep in contact since she tries to get up here every few weeks. Also with Skype and texting Quinn is always just a couple minutes away.
Then we come right back full circle to your truly, Rachel Berry. I'm attending NYADA with Britt and I'm clearly one of the most talented singers in our shows. Remember it's not being conceited if it's true...I mean lead roles as a freshmen kind of speak for themselves right?
Even though I sound very much like the old Rachel Berry, I assure you I have really grown into my own here in New York. I pretty much had to; this place has no problem letting you know you suck and when to pack it in so you always need to be a step ahead.
I was lucky I've known my dream my whole life and I knew to pursue it I would need to leave Lima in my review mirror. So that's what I did I packed up and never looked back, best decision I ever made.
Finally the two former cheerios walked in-late- of course; and with pinkies linked- of course.
My musical brain shuffled to the next song in its playlist: Journey; Don't Stop Believing. Oh great now I'm foot tapping to, awesome!
"Hey berry" wow two years and it would still kill Santana to call me 'Rachel'
"Hey S" I tried to casually reply
OOMPH suddenly I have a mouthful of blonde hair as Brittany attacks me in a bear hug.
"Ok ok, let her breathe B" I hear Santana chuckle. Ooh she is evil.
"Hey Britt" I say as my lungs finally recover the oxygen they need to form words.
"Hey Rach!" says the bubbly blonde. Wow she literally bounces when she talks; I would kill for energy like that.
The girls excuse themselves to get their drinks and I start tapping along to RENT'S ; Take Me Or Leave Me.
It's not that I'm jumpy it's that I'm extremely jumpy, this is my fourth cup of coffee today and I regret nothing. You see we just started our warm ups for an audition that's coming up in two weeks for an off Broadway show of West Side Story. Maria is my DREAM ROLE, and while I would like to say that I owned it today my performance was lacking something which has had me on edge since I left the studio.
Hence the four cups of coffee, I refuse to let that happen again.
"So how were the warm ups today Berry?" Santana asked while sitting down.
"They were more than satisfactory Santana thank you for asking" I replied as I tried to casually glance at Britt, she was there she knows the truth.
"You shouldn't lie Rach. I mean it probably would have gone better if you weren't looking at Chris the whole time." Brittany says without even looking up from the shapes she's drawing in her whipped cream.
Wait what? Was I? No way…
"Chris hmm?" Santana hums as she taps her chin. Ok seriously who does that?!
"He's the sexy dancer with all the tattoos right?" "Ahuh!" answers Britt still only half paying attention to us.
"Well hey way to go Berry!" wait, is she excited about this?
Dear lord if she asks for a high five I'm leaving.
For the record Chris was NOT why I was distracted today. I mean yes he is very good looking and an excellent leading man, definitely the kind of guy I would have been tripping over to date in high school. After thinking about it and really paying attention I can tell he is even more dramatic than me, which is really saying something. We would clash more than we would have fun, the bad would outweigh the good. Just no thank you.
"Wait" Santana's voice tears me back to reality. "So does this mean you're finally over Finnocence?"
Ah Finn Hudson; that boy is the very definition of a Lima loser. He doesn't have a job; even his own step father fired him! He failed out of community college and he lives in his moms' basement, what a winner!
I honestly can't tell you what I thought I saw in the guy. Maybe I thought I could change him, have him be the perfect husband as my career soared and then let him be my arm candy on the red carpets. Ugh what a mistake.
I think I will always have a soft spot for the guy but all I know now is that I will never ever, ever date him again...oh great now I have Taylor swift in my head!
I realize now being with Finn made me miss out on so much like I could have been friends with Quinn much, much sooner instead of fighting all the time in high school. Ah just saying the blondes name gives me butterflies in my stomach, but NO I refuse to think about that right now.
I'll set some time aside later to think about this. Rachel Berry is nothing if not organized.
"Come on Berry!" Santana drawls on. "Date a bad boy it would be 5 mega steps up from man boobs, plus tattoos are sexy! I mean I'm thinking about getting one."
I roll my eyes so hard I'm lucky they don't stick, that would NOT be an acceptable way to be photographed.
"Ok first of all" shit did I just put up one finger? Stop it Rachel! "I told you a thousand times: I'm over FINN. Second" no more fingers, good job Rach! "No one here is surprised you're getting a tat" self appointed bonus points for not air quoting that. "What's it going to be? A tramp stamp!"
Oh shit did I just voice my inside the head thoughts out loud? Shit, shit, shit oh no
That wasn't fair I'm stressed out over this audition and my new developing feelings for Quinn...wait what?! No, no new feelings for Quinn this is nuts, focus Rachel!
San is smirking at me as she slowly starts a slow clap. "Oh my god did Rachel Berry just make a joke? It only took 20 years but ladies and gentleman I think she did it!"
"San be nice" oh good Britt throws her two cents in there
As I look at her I notice she's coloring with crayons…where did she...no you know what? I don't want to know.
"Rach was always funny you were just too busy hating her to notice."
At this I smirk and raise one eyebrow, I learned that from one Quinn Fabray thank you very much.
Santana raises her hands in surrender "Alright alright" she can tell we need a topic change, and I'm ready for anything.
"So Berry, Q will be here in two weeks to celebrate your lifelong dream of playing Maria or whatever..." she tell me with a knowing smirk.
What's that all about?! She can't know I don't even know. Time out Rachel there's nothing to 'know' relax!
I feel the butterflies at the mention of Q's name. Stop it Rachel! We don't even like her like that...we don't!
"San, I appreciate the vote of confidence but who knows what will happen it's still so up in the air right now." Which is true, it is, anything can happen still.
There's a new girl; Ashley who is not as talented as me…well she's not. But she is a year older and for sure prettier, and we all know audiences love pretty, and big boobs…which this chick has.
"Oh come on Rach you were like super amazing today!" chimes in Britt, I know she means it because she stopped coloring to tell me. That's a big deal to her
"Yeah come on Berry. Even though were New Yorkers now I'll still go all lima heights adjacent on that director , and then you can even follow it up with a power point presentation on why you're the best. You gots this!"
I give out a real solid laugh, while I tap out a few bars of Some Nights. Now I remember why I keep these guys around.
To say this week has been hectic would be the understatement of the decade. I've been spending 11 hours a day in the studio just trying to perfect my vocals. I had to skip all my other classes but I mean who needs math? That's what my assistant will be for.
Warm ups have everyone so high strung it's crazy. People keep getting hurt on the simplest moves they can normally do in their sleep. Luckily Britt's dad is a doctor and was around when a dancer had a nasty fall earlier this week. Who would have thought right, Britt's dad a doctor? I guess we should have known since they housed a foreign exchange student in high school and they don't just give those to anyone.
On my walk home to my apartment I take a deep breath and start humming a little tune in my head, tomorrow is the big day and I've never felt more ready.
I wake up the morning of my audition and my phone is blowing up.
'good luck today baby girl, I know you'll do amazing! Call me? J-Q
"You gots this berry!'-S
"break a leg rach! Would u lik 2 borrw my lucky headband?"-B
"Good luck sweetie we love you! Call us tonight to tell us everything? Love you! Dad/daddy"
I have the biggest smile on my face as I start getting ready; these people really are the best.
As I sit in this cold dusty auditorium all I can think is 'this can't possibly be good for my vocals'. Now panic starts to set in.
Sue Sylvester is the director she is one of the toughest and most well known directors in New York. If she says you suck, well…you might as well start applying to community theatre.
When my name is called my knees start shaking, my palms are sweating and I'm pretty sure I forgot every word in the dictionary. When I make my way to the dusty stage that looks like it hasn't been used since before I was born I take a deep breath and realize 'hey I'm Rachel Barbara Berry' I can do this!
I put everything I can into this and dig deep; this is for all the marbles. It's maria!
When I'm done I can see Britt giving me a blinding smile and a wink.
I try to play coy but I can feel it in my bones- I was amazing.
Sylvester waves me away with a simple; "well it didn't completely suck" and I know it's the best I'm going to get so I quickly bow and get off stage.
When I leave the stage exit I'm immediately flagged down by Brittany. "You were amazing!" she gushes "well thank you!" I answer back just as excited. "So where to now?" I ask.
"The little bar on 7th you like" she answers with a dangerous smirk. "San has a surprise for you."
Um why don't I think I'll like this?
As soon as we walk in my eyes are drawn to the prettiest blonde in the room, "QUINN!" I yell before I can help myself.
Instantly we meet for a hug that lasts about 7 seconds to long to be considered a friendly hug. But who is counting?
"what are you doing here?" I finally ask when she pulls away. "you're not supposed to be here till Monday!" I'm suddenly lost in the most gorgeous hazel eyes I've ever seen. Wait is she talking? Shit! Did she say she missed me? Go with it!
"I missed you too!" I blurt out. Then I have a new thought; "but aren't you missing class?"
She smiles hesitantly "you're more important Rach." Oh hello butterflies, I really missed you.
She could tell me 3+3= 25 and follow it up with that smile and I would believe her.
You know Santana is more than a little drunk when she is offering to buy the bar her fourth straight round. You know you should probably stop her but; hey she is having fun so have at it!
"A TOAST" she suddenly yells "to Rachel Berry to be the next person to play Maria!" the crowd goes insane, she honestly could have said anything at this point they are just excited for free liquor.
"Possibly!" I feel the need to down play this; it'll be a cute story for an interview someday if I can say I was coy and shy about my first role.
"Oh hush" Quinn quiets me down by playfully throwing popcorn at me. Oh god that smile is back
I can't help but blush, no just kidding I'm not blushing its just hot in here right...right Rachel!
Were interrupted by a drunk Santana declaring to the bar that she 'needs to get her mack on and she needs to gets it on now' aka our cue to leave.
After a long night of drinking…I mean celebrating. I convince Quinn to stay the night at my place. It's just a little one bedroom apartment but it's perfect for crashing.
After an hour on the phone with my father's where I give them an exact play by play of my audition, I realize I really miss them. Maybe a trip back to Lima is in store soon? I think yes!
When I get to the living room Quinn is sprawled out on my couch with Funny girl in the DVD player all ready to go. I casually walk over and sit as far away from her on the couch as I can without being awkward.
She has my favorite movie all set up? Ah I love this girl...I mean as a friend! Yep best friends
Ten minutes into the movie and Quinn's head is on my shoulder while my hand plays with her hair. Friends do this right? We can pretend...
Suddenly she turns to me and quietly asks "when do they call and tell you, you got the part?"
"IF I get the part" I answer back just as quietly "they should call on Monday."
"so only 4 days? That's not too bad, I'm sure we can find something to distract you till then."
Oh god she probably didn't mean that how it sounded right? And why are we still whispering? And she gets a gold star for the day for not even pretending to entertain the fact that I might not possibly get the part.
Just as suddenly as she starts the conversation she drops it, but not before leaning up and giving me one soft lingering kiss to the forehead. Before she casually rests her head on my shoulder like that didn't just happen.
Come on friends do that right...who am I kidding? I'm in trouble.
Friday goes by in a blur just lounging around my apartment watching bad TV and old musicals. Another bonus point for Quinn for not even suggesting I go to my classes today. We obviously share the same views on math and my future career as being famous enough for an assistant.
Saturday we do touristy things all day, even though Quinn has spent almost as much time here as I have; but still it's fine. Were casually walking through central park when my phone rings, it's a number I don't recognize and I quickly answer it.
"Berry? It's Sylvester" all of a sudden my hands are shaking and there's no more oxygen in Central park how did that happen?!
"yes maam this is her" I quietly stutter. Come on Rachel get yourself together!
"Look I'm just calling to tell you, you're my new Maria. Mandatory rehearsals start Monday at 4 pm sharp. No exceptions you miss one you're out, got it?"
"Yes maam! Thank you so much I'll be there!"
When I hang up I let out a squeal of pure joy "I GOT IT!" I didn't know my voice could hit that octave.
Quinn runs over and gives me our longest hug to date, then she does something else new this time when she kisses me it's on my cheek. I could definitely get used to this.
That night were having celebratory rounds of drinks with Brittany and Santana.
"What did I tell you Berry? I knew you gots this! And I didn't even have to go Lima heights adjacent on anyone!"
"Like you even still could" Quinn playfully chuckles.
"Hey shut it preggers." Wow I've missed there banter back and forth.
Just then my phone rings I pick it up it's my daddy Leroy I forgot to tell him the good news!
"hey da—" suddenly I'm cut off by the sounds of crying and sirens.
"daddy what's wrong?!" now I have everyone at the tables attention but I don't want it.
"baby your dad and i..we were gonna come surprise you, Quinn called and told us you got the roll of Maria! We were going to the airport when a drunk driver ran a red light and hit us head on. Rach hun…your dad..he he he didn't make it I'm soo sorry!"
The whole table gasps at this they heard him loud and clear. This is a joke right? Am I famous enough to be punk'd yet?! But this isn't even remotely funny.
" no no…you're joking…daddy come on."
"Rach I'm so sorry but he's really gone..i need you to come home right away please…please sweetie"
"uhh I have to call you back." I hang up before he can get another word out. I feel like a zombie
"Rachel…" I know this is serious because Santana actually just called me Rachel.
No, no, no. my dad is NOT dead right? This is just a dumb joke someone's going to call me back any minute to say they are kidding
"Baby girl...talk to us please" Quinn! She wouldn't lie to me she'll tell me.
I look into her hazel eyes but their no longer hazel, now I just see black and hint of sadness.
"I have to go home" I finally mutter. "Come with me?"
"Of course" they all answer, even though I was really just talking to Quinn.
"He's really gone…like really, really gone. Fuck!" I finally curse. Seconds later Quinn has me in a hug and she's whispering in my ear as I break down "it's ok baby girl I got you, you're ok, let it out."
After I'm a blubbering mess for more than 10 minutes and I've for sure ruined Quinn's top. Brittany speaks up as the voice of reason "um Rach, what about West Side Story?"
I spin to Quinn as quick as I can. Her eyes say the exact same thing as the voices in my head.
Shit!
