The Vampire, the Hylden and the Terrifying Beastie what comes at Midnight

By Metal Gear Prime

Chapter 1: No good can come of this…

200 years ago, Kain defeated the Necromancer Mortanius and the demon Hash-Ak-Gik at the Pillars of Nosgoth to restore all but one of the corrupted Pillars. As he stands celebrating his victory the former Balance Guardian, the specter Ariel, materializes right behind him.

Ariel: Yo.

Kain (leaping twelve feet in the air): EEEEEEEEEK!

Upon landing, Kain gathered together what remained of his dignity and faced Ariel.

Ariel: Well done, Kain. You've managed to restore almost all of the Pillars. Only one other Guardian remains to be destroyed. Once he is destroyed, balance shall be restored to Nosgoth.

Kain: Is that so? Direct me to him and I shall rip his foul heart from his chest!

Ariel: Excellent. The one you seek is right here. (wink)

Kain (drawing the Soul Reaver): The fiend is stationed here at the Pillars, eh? Lemme at 'em!

Kain swings the Reaver heroically, nearly slicing into Ariel.

Ariel: No, no. You don't understand. The Balance Guardian is RIGHT HERE! (wink wink)

Kain: Alright, alright I heard you. (continues to look for the Guardian)

Ariel: Good grief! The man you are seeking is standing IN THE SAME PLACE AS YOU!

Kain (in a blind panic): WHAT?!? VAE VICTUS!

Kain starts to wildly slash at the air with the Soul Reaver as Ariel bangs her head against her pillar in frustration.

Ariel: That does it! To hell with subtlety! Kain!

Kain (stops slashing with the Reaver): Yes?

Ariel: I'll be brief. You, Kain, are the Balance Guardian, chosen from birth to be my replacement after I had been murdered. Unfortunately, you were tainted from the beginning thanks to Nupraptor's hissy fit and so must die in order for the Pillars to be completely healed. Now be a good boy and stab yourself to death with the Soul Reaver.

Kain: Yes ma'am.

Kain holds the Reaver by the hilt and is about to plunge it into his chest when a thought strikes him.

Kain: Waaaaiiit a second…now that I give it some thought, this doesn't seem like all that good a plan.

Ariel: Less talk more stabby.

Kain: Isn't there any other option?

Ariel: Well, you COULD decide to live on and doom Nosgoth to an eternity of decay and ruin while at the same time establishing a mighty empire with yourself as it's powerful and god-like emperor, but why would you want to do something as silly as that? Now let's…Kain?

Ariel looks around for the suddenly absent Kain before spotting him prancing away from the Pillars, humming a ditty fit for a conqueror. Or in this case a loony vampire who wants to be a conqueror.

Kain (to himself): Emperor Kain the Studly…it has a nice ring to it…

Ariel watches dumbfounded as Kain prances out of sight until a loud groaning sound emanates from behind her. Turing around she watches as the Pillars crumble to the ground in an undignified heap.

Ariel: Crud.

To be continued…