Hey, I know I have other chapters to finish off, but this just came to my mind too. It won't be a long thing ^-^ Well, Hope you enjooooooy! Mind to RxR!
It started with that perfect kiss, everything was right, But why? How could everything be perfect with him? I hadn't realised that shortly after, the kiss was just the beginning. The poison had already settled in, and everything was just going down in front of my eyes. My father was always right, his methods were wrong, but he was always right.
"You can't!" Clenching his fists slightly, I could see the pain in his eyes. But I had no life with him. I had to hurt him now, so that my father wouldn't.
"There's nothing that you can do. What happened was nothing" Folding my arms across my chest, a small smirk curled upon my lips. "You're pathetic Usui, look at you. Did you honestly think that I liked you in that sort of manner?" looking into Horo's sad eyes, I couldn't hurt him, but this was for the best. Father said he would kill Horo in front of me.
FLASHBACK
'Do it!'
Standing in front of Tao Ren, stood his father Tao En. Arms folded angrily across his chest, with a frown down at his young son. Taking in a deep breath, Ren wanted Horo. For the first time in his life, he wanted something so bad, and he was hell bent on getting what he wanted.
Frowning up at his father, Ren slammed his right foot onto the ground heavily, allowing it to echo off the walls in the dungeon. Clenching his fists tightly that lay ready at his sides.
'You can't stop me. You can do all you want, but I will never and I mean, Never! Give Horo up for anyone. Not even you!' pointing angrily at his father, he waited another minute in silence.
Eventually En had decided to break the silence.
'Ren, this boy will hurt you. You two have no future, can't you see that he's using you. I have always said that you're so called 'friends' are all out to get you. And by allowing this boy into your life, into your heart, then he's where he wants to be, to crush you.'
Shaking his head angrily, his heart pounded into his chest, thinking about Horo.
'Horo is different; I know what he's like. And he wouldn't hurt anyone. He's just not like that."
Narrowing his eyes angrily at the young Chinese shaman, En lifted his right hand, clenching it into a fist.
'If that is what you choose… Then he will die by my hands!'
Ren's eyes widened realising what En was about to do. But before he could defend or move out the way, En had already delivered the punch, straight into Ren's chest. Causing him to gasp out in pain, and crumple to the floor, holding onto his stomach in pain.
'I shall teach you about respect once more, and if you don't tell that Usui boy to leave you alone, then I will have to kill him in front of your eyes, my boy'
Lowering his head, he couldn't help the tears that fell from his eyes to the ground, Horo was the only thing that had felt safe, that had felt right to him. And he had to give that up. Closing his eyes tightly Ren slowly nodded. Accepting the pain that was about to be delivered to him.
END FLASHBACK
Pulling my arms away from Horo's hands, and narrowing my eyes at him, trying to hold the look of hate and disgust as much as possible, I turned my back to him and closed my eyes slowly, biting my bottom lip to conceal my pain, of not wanting to let him go.
"Like I've said a million times before, you're pathetic. And the thought of you even thinking that we could ever be an item just sickens me". Tilting my head slightly to the right and clenching my eyes tighter, I had to wrap this up. Before Horo was able to see how I was truly feeling about this whole situation.
"Ren"
His soft voice felt like a warm chill up my spine, even his sad voice made me just want to be with him more. But truthfully, I had never thought about Horo in that way until the day that we had that kiss. It was just one kiss but it felt so right, in so many ways.
"Ren" I hadn't realized, that in the time I spent thinking about that kiss Horo had suddenly appeared in front of me. Widening my eyes and half opening my mouth, for the first time Horo had actually caught me off guard. I could feel my cheeks getting redder, stepping back trying to keep my stance, Horo gently took a hold of my arm, and pulled me into his chest. Wrapping his arms around me and allowing me to just relax into his embrace. I felt so calm, so peaceful. So why was this so wrong to my father? If I was happy, surely that was all that mattered.
Gently kissing me on the top of my head, he let out a sigh of hurt and pain. His embrace was strong, yet gentle; I knew that if I was to speak now, then I wouldn't be able to turn him away.
"Ren, you're a great friend to me. The best I've ever had. I can talk to you for hours on end and not get bored". He carried on gently playing with my hair.
Blushing deeply, I ended up doing the womanly thing, and just hiding my embarrassment in Horo's chest and, of course. This had brought great amusement to Horo. When I buried my head into his chest I could hear a small giggle escape from his mouth. Problem with that was I didn't act in my usual way which would have been, hitting him, blushing then storming off, Oh no. I just stayed there, gripping onto his shirt tightly, my head still buried in his chest and my eyes clenched shut. I didn't want to let him go. I couldn't hurt Horo, if it was anybody else in the world, I would but I just couldn't hurt this guy, this big, gorgeous, handsome guy, oh boy. Cringing at the words I had just used to describe the guy I hated not long ago, really did make me sweat drop.
But alas, this had to end, because I knew for a fact that my father would not go back on his word. If he said that he was going to kill someone then he probably would. So, taking in a long breath, and remembering Horo Usui's smell, and the warmth that just seemed to relax me completely, I closed my eyes for the last time in his arms, and let out a deep sigh.
"I'm sorry that it has to be this way…" Shaking my head, and trying to stop myself from sounding upset, I clenched my fist tightly, preparing myself for hurting the man that I had so many emotions and feelings towards. Pain was the last thing on my mind when it came down to Horo. But to hurt him, I had to really hurt him.
Trying to calm the shakes of not wanting to hurt Horo, I could feel his sad eyes locked on me. He wasn't just going to let me go, so this would either be harder for me, or just my usual self.
"Ren, don't. You know that you don't have to do anything. You don't have to listen to what others say. Please Ren."
'Horo' closing my eyes trying to hold back my tears, and slowly unclenching my shaking hand, I had never been so confused in my life.
"Ren" My eyes widened, in slight fear, hearing Horo say my name. Because his wasn't the only voice calling out my name, He was watching. 'That's right my boy. If you don't hurt him, then I shall'
Closing my eyes tightly, I clenched onto my head in pain, and without even thinking, I had pushed Horo back slightly as well. "Just, get lost I can handle this!"
Extending his arm out towards me for reassurance and worry, Horo's voice seemed to speak loud and clear to how he was feeling. "I'm sorry Ren…"
Looking up at him, I could see his bottom lip tremble slightly and his eyes watering up. But trying to hold my glare, I felt my heart thump into my chest, and cause me pain. To see Horo so upset, his smile was no longer there, where had it gone? Widening my eyes in disbelief, he wasn't smiling because I was hurting him. 'No, He can't be hurt because of me, besides it was only a kiss… just a kiss right?'
"If, you ever need to talk to someone, Ya know. My door is always open for you". And forcing himself to smile, my heart sank even more, seeing the pain and hurt in his eyes, in his face, everything about Horo was just hurt. I wanted to know what was going on in that head of his. What he might be thinking, but, this was working in my father's favour. Horo and I, that first, and last kiss was now nothing.
Lowering my head, I clutched onto Horo's shirt even tighter for the last time. 'Horo, please forgive me' taking in a deep breath, I slowly moved away from Horo, pushing his arms down at his sides, Closing my eyes slightly, I kept my head low, he couldn't see into my eyes. I knew that if he was to look into my eyes then I wouldn't be able to do what I was just about to.
"Horo" I forced myself to smirk, and gave out a small laugh.
"You, saying things like that. I never thought that you could become an ever bigger and more pathetic person." Stepping further back, I still had my head low. I could feel the tears pricking at my eyes, waiting to get out. But I couldn't do that. I couldn't allow myself to break down in front of him. This was for his safety.
"Grow up Usui. You're just making me sick, just thinking about you. And, everything that you are now." And with that, I turned from him, my fists clenched and now, I was unable to control my feelings for Horo and tears were starting to stream from my eyes. I can't stop myself anymore.
Taking a small step forward, I could feel Horo's hand quickly grip mine.
"Don't!"
Widening my eyes, I tried to pull my hand away from Horo's but, to no avail. He was hell bent on telling me whatever it was.
"I know you don't mean any of that Ren. I know you. Maybe you don't like that thought, but I know that something is wrong. Something's happened so you're forcing yourself away from me." Gently letting go of my hand, I smiled faintly and the tears started to come even more from eyes, but for another reason.
"Ren, I think I'm in love with you" Shaking his head, he pulled at my wrist so I was facing him, then gently cupping his hand under my chin, and lifting it up. He smiled down at me, with such happiness. "I don't think that I love you… I know that I love you Ren."
Clenching my fists with happiness, I could feel my body acting in a strange way. Suddenly, realizing what I was doing, I had already jumped onto Horo and was hugging him tightly. Nuzzling his head into mine, he gently placed his hand onto the back of mine and ruffled it.
"I know you Renny. I can tell when you're trying to hide things and when you genuinely mean them. So for whatever reasons you came here to say those things to me. Well, you and I can handle it. And sort the person out whose making you say things." Gently setting me back down onto my feet and moving some hair from my face, he gave me his usual happy smile and kissed me on the forehead.
"Where's the Renny I know, that doesn't take shit from anyone, and always does what he wants, instead of doing what others say."
Smiling faintly, I hugged into Horo's chest tightly and nodded.
"I know, I've not really been myself lately. But that's because…" Shaking my head, and stepping back from Horo slightly. His confusion made me laugh a little.
"What? What's wrong?"
"I need you to do me a favour, and just go along with all of this. I'll sort it out, but you have to trust me. I want you to fake that we've broken up."
"What?" Stepping towards me, and grabbing hold of my hand, I could feel that he was scared and worried. Not for his safety, but mine, surprisingly enough.
"Horo, trust me. Just go with it, and I'll be back in no time okay." Stepping towards him, I leaned up onto my tip toes to reach his height; I gently pressed my lips against his. 'I love you'.
Deeply sighing, and forcing himself to smile, he slowly nodded, gripping onto my hand tightly and gently caressing it.
"Okay, just… Be careful Ren. And don't be afraid to call me if you need my help okay."
"Okay." Taking in a deep breath, I turned from Horo, and headed down the street. He was still watching me till the very end. I could feel it, He was worried and wasn't just going to stand back and wait to see if I was still alive or not. Horo's a great guy.
Narrowing my eyes, I stuffed my hands into my pockets and prepared for my father's encounter, I was ready this time. This time, he was the one who would crumble in front of me. The one who would be in pain, smirking to myself at the thought of his suffering, I was excited to begin my master plan.
However, I'm pretty sure Horo wouldn't agree with my plan, but, I wasn't going to tell him what my sadistic mind was thinking. The less he knows the better. You know the saying, what he doesn't know, won't hurt him, right?...
I hope that you enjoyed this chapter, there may be more to come, maybe just two or three more chapters, but, I hope you liked it!
