AN: Storyline set following "Objects in Space." Will try to update on a biweekly/monthly basis. All characters are properties of respective owners. Please enjoy and review!

Kaylee put a hand on Simon's shoulder. "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"No," Simon gulped. "In fact, I'm reasonably certain it's not."

They were sitting side-by-side in Kaylee's hammock in the engine room, beside Serenity's rotating engine. Simon half hoped something would break, so that Kaylee would have to fix it and he could gain a few minute's respite by pretending to help her.

No such luck. Simon lingered a moment longer, then sighed and set his jaw. "Well, here goes."

Kaylee bit her lip as they walked down the hallway, hand in hand. The silence as they neared the hold felt ominous; she needed to say something. She blurted out the first thing that came to her mind. "If you die, I'll never forget you!"

Simon nodded uncertainly. "Thanks for the encouragement."

"Oh, anytime!"


Jayne was waiting for Simon in Serenity's cargo bay, pummeling a hanging punching bag. He looked up as Simon approached.

"'Bout time, Doc. I was afraid you'd back out of this." He glared at the catwalk. "Ain't y'all got something better to do?"

"What?" said Wash. "And miss two fine specimens of the human animal locked in mortal combat?" He looked around. "Did anyone bring snacks?"

Zoe gave her husband a reproving shove. "We're here to support Simon."

"He don't need any supportin' just yet," Jayne said. "Come back in an hour, and then you can carry him out."

Shepherd Book glanced at Captain Reynolds. "You're sure this was well-advised, Captain?"

"Not by a stretch, preacher," Mal muttered. "But the man volunteered, and with a job in the hold, I don't need Jayne for the moment—I've no cause to stop Simon unless he's hurt. All the same, you might be wise to invoke a saint or two."

"The breaking strength of the human femur is nearly seven thousand five hundred pounds per square inch," River observed, lying on her back at the catwalk's edge and staring at Simon upside-down. "Approximately fifty-two megapascals, five hundred ten atmospheres." She rolled onto her side and giggled at Mal. "If we were on Jupiter, the air would snap his thighbones."

Simon gazed up at his sister, then shot an uneasy glance at Jayne. "I still don't understand why she wanted you to train me."

"Self-defense is a good skill," Mal called to him. "A man's got to stand up for what's his, and that starts with his life. I'll not have any soul on this boat unprepared when the next Jubal Early shows up."

"Now that I do understand," grunted Jayne. He threw a final punch that shook the punching bag on its chains.

"Oh, no, me too," said Simon. "I just don't understand why she wanted me to step into the ring with Jayne."

Jayne rubbed his chin in mock pensiveness. "Such a puzzle confounds even a mind as great as mine." He tossed a padded jacket at Simon and cracked a grin. "'Course, that don't mean I ain't going to enjoy this. Best get suited up, Doc."

Simon turned to face Jayne, zipping up the jacket. "Why aren't you wearing pads?"

Jayne laughed. "The only reason the Captain keeps me around is 'cause I don't break near as easy as the rest of you fragile little creatures. Let's get started."

Simon raised his fists. "So how does exactly does this work?"

Jayne laughed. "Boxers only fight for money, Doc. If you get in a life-or-death scrape, you ain't gonna have time to bob and weave with the guy; you want to throw him. Allow me to defenestrate." He motioned for Simon to attack him. "C'mon, Doc, take your best shot."

Simon hesitated, then charged. Jayne blocked the doctor's wild right hook, then grabbed his arm and pulled down and forward. Simon's legs were swept from under him, and he crashed to the floor of the cargo bay.

Kaylee leaned over the railing. "Is he all right?"

"Gorramit, girl, he's fine," Jayne said. He looked down at Simon and kicked him with the toe of his boot. "I think."

Simon winced and got to his feet. "Somehow, that doesn't seem fair. You outweigh me by a good fifty pounds."

"Ain't so hard when your opponent's charging in like a rutting maniac," Jayne said. "Which he's liable to do in a brawl on account of him being probably drunk and none too bright. Now you try."

Simon nervously assumed roughly the stance Jayne had used. Jayne charged and swung his right hand in a massive haymaker. Simon caught the outstretched hand and levered Jayne into the air. Jayne got halfway over, then lost momentum and stopped. Unable to support the big man's weight, Simon collapsed to the ground with Jayne on top of him. Simon let out a scream that shook Serenity's rafters.

Mal shook his head. "Gonna be a long day."


Captain's log, stardate 5077.1. Enterprise patrolling the Triumph sector in response to reports of increased pirate activity. Interception of Federation cargo by thieves and smugglers has of late put multiple colonization ventures on hold. Ordered to intercept suspicious vessels, locate stolen cargo, and detain suspected pirates for justice…

Kirk shook himself awake and rose from his seat on the bridge. "Status report, Mr. Sulu."

Sulu rubbed the sleep from his eyes and glanced at his instrument panel. "As usual, Captain. Radar sweep reveals nothing."

Kirk shook his head. "Well, Mr. Sulu, keep me informed. Hail Bones if you need me." Kirk turned around and made his way to the lift.

"Sick Bay," he muttered, grabbing the control stick with his right hand.

Sulu glanced over at Uhura, who was sitting at the communications desk with her head on one hand and literally staring out into space. "Lieutenant Uhura?"

She glanced up. "Yes?"

"I hadn't seen your name on the shipwide pool for when we sight another vessel. Two weeks' pay if you want to join—the smart money's on eleven days from now."

Uhura shook her head. "I don't gamble, Mr. Sulu. Best of luck to you all the same."

"Thanks." Sulu shook his head and tapped the radar screen. "I'd gladly give up my stake in the betting if we ran across someone—anyone—right now. And I'd give a month's pay for five minutes down on Triumph with a Petri dish and half a dozen glass jars. I haven't had so much as a new worm to examine in…well, too long. We'd better find someone soon, or I don't know what we're going to do…"


Spock was waiting for Kirk outside the sick bay. "You called me here, Captain?"

"Yes, Mr. Spock," said Kirk, opening the door. "I want your opinion on this, too."

Leonard McCoy, the Enterprise's doctor, looked up as Kirk entered. "Not feeling unwell, Captain?" he asked with a frown. "You aren't scheduled for a checkup for at least a month; any illness?"

"No, Bones, nothing like that," said Kirk, dropping heavily into a chair. "I just need your advice. It's about this Triumph run. It's not doing the crew any good."

McCoy nodded. "You're right, Jim. Long, empty missions like this one are always hard on a crew both mentally and physically. The crew members I've examined in the past three weeks have all shown elevated stress levels. Frankly, I'm not sure we can take much more inactivity."

"What would you have me do?" said Kirk. "We're already running a full complement of drills, Mr. Scott's had his men fix every squeaky hinge and burned-out light bulb aboard, and our gym is full twenty-four hours a day."

McCoy shook his head. "Nothing left to do but wait."

Kirk balled a fist. "I despise these patrols. The Enterprise isn't a security vessel; we're an exploration craft. We're stuck here playing hide-and-seek with smugglers when we should be out there, charting the galaxy."

"Security is vital to the success of the Triumph settlement," interjected Spock. "If pirates were to cut off the supply line, it would be utterly destroyed."

Kirk turned in his chair. "Mr. Spock, my human frustration with my mission does not disqualify me from my understanding its necessity."

"Understood, Captain."

Kirk's video conference unit beeped. He turned it on—Sulu appeared on screen.

"Sir, we've picked up a reading on a ship. Request you come to the bridge at your earliest possible convenience."

"Right away, Mr. Sulu. Kirk out."

"Something to break up the monotony?" McCoy suggested.

"Let's hope so," said Kirk.


Spock and Kirk reached the bridge. Sulu waved excitedly at his instrument panel. "We're fairly certain she's a ship, sir, breaking orbit from Triumph. We haven't identified it yet, but it's certainly not Federation."

"Do you think we've got a pirate, sir?" asked Uhura.

"We'll soon find out," said Kirk. "Lieutenant, open ship-ship."

Uhura fired up the Enterprise's communication circuits. "Channel open, Captain," she replied.

"Unidentified starship, this is the USS Enterprise. Please state your purpose in this sector."

Sulu looked up from his monitor. "We're reading the ship's navigation satellite now, Captain. Looks to be a Firefly-class transport…designation Serenity…"


Jayne grabbed Simon from behind, pinching his windpipe shut with a sleeper hold. Simon grabbed Jayne's arm and began pulling down, trying to loosen the mercenary's grip. Jayne's arm seemed glued to Simon's neck; the doctor felt himself begin to black out.

"Hurry up, boy," Jayne ordered. "Ain't got much air left."

"Come on, Simon!" shouted Kaylee. "I know you can do it!"

Simon heard Kaylee's voice coming as if from far away. He braced his feet and heaved forward on Jayne's arm. The big man's hold loosened an inch—Simon sucked in a huge breath. The fresh oxygen invigorated him; Simon kept pulling down with all his strength. Before he knew it, Jayne was tumbling to the floor in front of him.

"And we have a winner!" shouted Wash.

"Great work, Simon!" said Kaylee.

Jayne rolled to his feet. "Not bad, Doc," he said with the barest hint of a smile. "Let's run it again."

Simon nodded and turned his back. Jayne reassumed his choke hold and began to squeeze, harder this time. Just then, the ship's proximity alert flashed. Distracted, Jayne looked up and eased off on the hold. Simon punched him in the face.

"We've got contact!" Mal shouted. "Who's on watch? Wash!"

"What's going on?" Jayne called, holding one hand to his nose.

Wash was already halfway to his seat on Serenity's bridge. He jumped down into the cockpit. "Captain, we have a Constitution-class Alliance cruiser on intercept course!"

Mal and Zoe were only a few steps behind. "Maybe they haven't noticed us?" Zoe said hopefully.

A voice crackled over the radio. "Unidentified starship, this is the USS Enterprise. Please state your purpose in this sector…"

Stay tuned!