Part I: 'Tis the Season to be Jolly

Now it's Christmas

And you're so far away

On this Christmas

I just wish you had stayed

And I wonder

If you're thinking of me today

It's Not Christmas Without You by Katharine McPhee


Sarah buttoned her red winter coat and tied her black and Irish green checkered scarf around her neck as she walked out of the bright and warm café, preparing herself to be met by the chilly afternoon air. The sky was filled with grey clouds and snow was lightly falling from them. She shivered as a gust of wind passed by. Reaching a gloved hand into her pocket, she took out her black beanie and pulled it down over her ears. Then she started her walk home through the town, leaving footprints behind her in the thin layer of snow.

She had taken a part-time job at the café as soon as she started college to pay the rent for her apartment. She earned a minimum wage and therefore she often had to get up early or work late hours to get the money she needed. Today though, the café was closing earlier. It was Christmas Eve and not only could you see it, but you could feel it in the air. There was no mistaking the joy in every face she passed in the street. When she came to the town square, a choir was singing carols in front of the big Christmas tree. It was all lit up in bright colors and Sarah smiled at the sight. The angelic voices brought a kind of warmth in the bitter cold. When she had passed the square, she stopped by a shop window to look at the many Christmas baubles on display. Her eyes were instantly drawn to a snow globe with a small figure depicting Rudolph the red nosed reindeer inside. She stared at it for several minutes and it didn't take long for the reindeer to be replaced by an image of herself in a white, glittering ball gown. Even though it had been eight years since then, it was so easy for her to reimagine her journey through the Labyrinth. She could remember how foolish she had been, wishing her brother away. Back then, he had been nothing but a burden to her. An unwanted family member along with her stepmother. Now, Toby meant the world to her and she had grown to appreciate Irene over the years. In other words, she had matured. Grown up. But there would always be a part of her that would never grow up. She still held on to her childhood and her friends. Sarah couldn't keep the sad smile from forming on her lips. It had been so long since she'd last seen them; Hoggle, Ludo and Sir Didymus. She wondered if they celebrated Christmas in the Underground. If he celebrated Christmas. Her sad smile instantly turned into a frown and she left the shop window behind, suddenly in a hurry to get home. But leaving the thoughts of him behind was not an option. If only she hadn't stopped to look at that snow globe. Then maybe she wouldn't have been reminded of the fact that she actually missed him too. She wondered if he missed her just as much. Probably even more, she thought. Or maybe not at all? Dread seeped through her like poison. What if he had forgotten all about her? The very thought of it made her gloomy. Much more than she wanted to admit. She didn't even have a good reason for missing him. All he ever did during her quest was try to bring her down. And yet, his last words had seemed so sincere. Fear me, love me, do as I say and I will be your slave. He needed to learn a thing or two about love, though.

When Sarah got to her apartment and her eyes landed on the clock on the kitchen wall, she cursed herself for stopping by that window. She only had about fifteen minutes to get ready and catch the bus that would take her to her father's house. At first glance, she could have sworn her clock had added the number thirteen in her absence. Because why not? There was no time to take a shower, but she figured she could just as well do that at her father's. She would be staying over the night and celebrate Christmas the next day with him, Irene and Toby. Usually, her cousins would come too, but this year, they had decided to spend Christmas in Cyprus. They were probably already working on their tans. Not that she was that jealous. Christmas was, according to Sarah, the most wonderful time of the year and without snow, the charm of the season was lost.

She had everything packed within ten minutes and made sure all the lights were off before leaving her apartment and walking to the bus stop. When she got on the bus, it was hard to ignore the heavily decorated interior. It almost made her feel ashamed that she'd never bothered to make an effort decorating her own place. All she had was a star hanging in her bedroom window and a couple of figurines here and there in the form of gnomes and pixies. Not even her curtains were the right color for the season. The next thing she noticed was that she was the only passenger. Perhaps there would be more along the way. She took one of the seats in the front and let her gaze wander over the people walking by. Often they came in pairs. They looked so happy, holding hands or stealing kisses. The joy was all around her and Sarah tried so hard to be a part of it, but all she could do was mope. Seeing all those couples only reminded her of the failed relationships she had been part of. She had started dating in her late teenage years, but nothing serious ever came out of it. Every time she felt as if there was something missing. What she was looking for simply wasn't there. It had to be a curse or something. But who knew, maybe a Christmas miracle would come her way? Maybe her one true love would get on this very bus and sit with her?

No one got on the bus.

By the time the bus arrived at her stop, it had gotten dark, but through the cracks between the clouds, she could see stars shining bright. I move the stars for no one. Sarah told herself to stop thinking about him. It couldn't possibly lead to anything good. "Merry Christmas, Miss!" the bus driver said when she got off. His smile was so big, she couldn't help but return it. It seemed like his spirits were higher than the stars in the sky and as he drove off, Sarah was sure he was eager to get home to his family. It lifted her own spirits, if only a little. She picked up a rapid pace and headed to her own family.

Toby had been looking out the window for a long time waiting for his sister, so when he finally saw her coming up to the house, he rushed to the door and opened it for her. "Sarah!" he exclaimed, grinning from ear to ear.

"Hi, Toby!" Sarah picked him up into her arms and twirled around, making him laugh. He was nine years old now and soon he would be too heavy for her to carry. She wished he would stop growing and as the thought crossed her mind, she held him tighter to her, but Toby had had enough.

"All right, put me down!" He tried pushing away, but Sarah wasn't planning on letting him go just yet.

"Oh yeah?" She started tickling him and in response, he laughed uncontrollably and started kicking his legs. Eventually, she had to surrender and put him down. Their father appeared in the doorway and opened his arms wide for his daughter.

"Welcome home Sarah and Merry Christmas!" He enveloped her in a tight embrace.

"Merry Christmas dad." He kissed the top of her head.

"It's good to have you back."

"It's good to be back." That's when Irene called from the kitchen.

"Robert, would you please close the door? It's getting cold in here!" He did as told and ushered Sarah inside. She took off her coat and hung it up on the rack before following her father into the kitchen where Irene was making dinner.

"Sarah, it's so good to see you again!" Irene did not hesitate to give her a hug. Things were much better between them now than ever before.

"It's good to see you too."

"Dinner will be ready in just a moment. Why don't you take your packing with you upstairs to your room in the meantime?" Irene suggested politely and Sarah agreed it was a good idea. She had missed her old room.

When she opened the door to peek inside, she found that her room was just as she'd left it before she had moved out. Of course, many of the things she'd taken with her to her apartment and some things were safely stored up in the attic. Other than that, her bed was still there, neatly made and waiting for her to sleep in it and her vanity was also there to her right. She put her bag down on the bed and it was then she saw it lying on her pillow. A large, white feather with brown speckles. Could it be? Gingerly, she picked it up in her hand and ran her fingers along the edges. It was much softer than it appeared. Looks could be deceiving. Her father called from downstairs, telling her that dinner was ready. Sarah lifted the pillow and hid the feather underneath. She would have to look closer later.

Before she went to bed that night, she had a shower and braided her hair so that it would be wavy in the morning instead of straight and plain boring. It would be something new and refreshing. A chance to make herself up for once. It happened so rarely nowadays. She really missed playing dress up in the park. She put on her PJs, sat down on the bed and took out the feather to examine it further. There was a knock on her door and Toby walked in before Sarah said anything. Had she been younger, she would have scolded him for entering without permission. Now, she only greeted him with a smile. "Hey," she said. "What are you doing here?" He looked a little sheepish for some reason.

"I just wanted to say that I'm glad you're home again." She could have cried. But she didn't.

"Me too, kid. Me too." Toby's gaze landed on the delicate feather in her hands and his brow furrowed.

"What's that?" he asked and walked up to the bed to have a closer look himself.

"It's a feather," she said and handed it to him. He took it and held it as gently as if he were holding a china cup. As if he was afraid that if he dropped it, it would break into a million pieces.

"But what kind of feather?" he asked suddenly and Sarah wasn't sure if her answer was correct, but her gut told her it was.

"An owl's feather. A barn owl to be exact."

"It's really soft." Sarah nodded.

"It is." Then she changed the subject. "So, do you think Santa will come down the chimney with your presents during the night?" Toby rolled his eyes at that and handed back the feather.

"Sarah, I'm too old to believe in Santa." She had no idea what had made him stop believing, but she supposed all children grew up at some point. Still, she was slightly disappointed at hearing him say it. Especially after knowing what he'd been through as a baby.

"If you say so," she said with a shrug and tried to hide her disappointment the best she could. They said good night and Toby left her alone with the feather again. She put it back under her pillow and turned the lights off to finally go to sleep. She hadn't wished for anything this Christmas. There was nothing she particularly wanted. But closing her eyes, she knew exactly what she wanted and the words subconsciously slipped through her mouth. If her wish would come true remained to be seen. If the Fates allow.


Author's Note: Hello my lovelies! Hope you are well and in the mood for a Christmas story! This little fic will be divided into three parts. It won't be that long, but I hope you will still find it enjoyable! Christmas is just around the bend and I can't wait! Stay tuned for the second part. ;)