I.
He shines, Riley notices.
He brims with self confidence, embraces his irregularities. He is warm smiles and bright eyes.
There is a feeling. A heart swelling, soaring feeling Riley will get when Zane looks at him, the corners of his mouth turned up in a half smile, and Riley will smile back at him so hard it hurts.
He doesn't know exactly when he fell in love with Zane. Maybe it's the way his hair looks when he forgets to brush it in the morning, how the corners of his eyes crinkle when he smiles, how he stuffs his hands into his pockets when he gets nervous (and there are a million other things that make him fall in love).
It wasn't supposed to happen (just like he wasn't supposed to be gay). He dated Fiona, because he knew she was fucking beautiful, and sometimes, when he looks at her now, he tries to get that feeling and for a second his heart flutters (wild brown curls become spiky black hair and warm eyes are now glittering).
He blinks and the feeling is gone.
II.
Riley doesn't classify them as a "gay" couple. They are Riley and Zane, Zane and Riley, and that's really all that matters (they are two people who are too in love to care).
III.
Sometimes Riley wants to scream it out loud. Say "I love Zane" for the world to hear, and he would give anything to see the smile on Zane's face (and the plan sounds all too good to be true). He stands up and suddenly chokes on his words and maybe it's best to do it another day (coward).
IV.
He hates being a liar (he is a liar, and each time as he watches Zane's face fall there is the beginning of that familiar ache at the bottom of his heart) and sometimes he begins to think that maybe, if he tells people that he's – gay (and he's such a coward he doesn't even like admitting it to himself), then he can be happy. But then he sees his friends (the ones that don't know the real Riley) and the way they look up to him because he's the god damn quarter back and he is a football player again: one who likes fucking chicks (once), one who loves bikini car washes (twice), one who hates that fag Zane on the football team (three times).
Three times his heart breaks (but who cares, he's already too broken to be fixed anyways).
V.
Zane leaves him and he should've seen it coming, he's probably already got a guy who is proud of who they are (who isn't a coward like him).
All Riley has is the last remnants of a warm smile.
