In a snow-covered pine forest, a quartet of tree fellers was hard at work.

'TIMBER!' one shouted, as a large pine fell heavily to the ground and landed in a puff of snow. At the sound of impact, the young man's three companions turned to face him.

'Jeez, Todd,' said a large guy with a moustache. 'Could it be a little bigger? How we gonna get that on the back of the truck?'

'Hey, no problem,' said Todd. 'This is how New Yorkers like their Christmas trees. Trust me – I got a cousin who lives in Brooklyn.'

'The boss wants quantity, not quality,' said the guy with the moustache.

'Who says size equals quality?' said the only woman among them, grinning at Todd. 'Good things come in small packages. So lay off the macho stuff, Todd, okay?'

So saying, the young woman laid a hand on the foliage of a pine tree that was at least three times her own height, and looked cheekily at Todd through her eye protection. Then, suddenly, her face twisted into an expression of horror and she began to scream. The three men threw down their chainsaws and ran to her.

'Susie!' cried Todd.

'What's happening?' Susie wailed, as a wave of green energy began to pass through her body. The untalkative man and the moustachioed man began to back away from her. Todd stayed nearby and reached for her hand, but found himself holding a fistful of pine needles.

'Susie,' he whispered, staring at the small pine tree that now stood before him.

Their two colleagues meanwhile were running like mad, but the green energy shot out of Susie and became a whir of wind and pine needles. It flew past Todd's face, catching up at once with first one man and then the other. Within a moment they, too, were merely trees in the forest.

Susie's chainsaw was lying on the ground beside her, and the other two where they had been dropped. The gust of wind and foliage doubled back and whipped up a flurry of snow from the ground, burying the chainsaws and giving Todd a good dusting. Then it flew to him, stopping millimetres in front of his face. It now took on an almost human form, transparent and floating and bedecked in pine needles and cones.

'Where?' it said, in the voice of the wind roaring through the trees, blowing a gale in Todd's face and forcing him to close his eyes against it. 'Where are you taking them?'

'N-N-N-New York,' Todd just about managed to say.

The creature's form dissolved once more into wind and leaves; its green glow engulfed Todd, then left him, a sorry-looking pine with thin foliage and a drooping crown weighed down by snow.


An expensive-looking red car was driving through Manhattan. In it were Kylie, who was looking sulkily out of the passenger side window, and her father Steve, who was driving.

'I'm really looking forward to meeting your friends,' Steve was saying. 'I'm so glad you've made some friends, honey.'

Kylie shrugged and said, 'We just work together.'

'Yes, well... that's better than nothing.'

'What do you mean nothing? You're forgetting Jack.'

Steve's fingers tightened on the wheel, and his eyes slid over to Kylie for a moment. 'I'm sorry I didn't believe you about Jack.'

'Nobody believed me about Jack,' said Kylie. 'Even Grandma Rose didn't believe me about Jack.'

'It's so wonderful that you found him.'

'Right. Yay me.'

'Kylie, why are you in this mood?'

'Because.'

'Um,' said Steve. 'Is there anything special you'd like to do while I'm here? We could see a show, or go to the skating rink, or –'

'– traipse round some lame Christmas market or visit Santa's Village? I'm not seven, Dad. You don't have to throw Christmas in my face to make me not care about Mom being someplace else.'

'Right. Sorry. It's not like that even worked when you were seven, huh?'

'I just want to sit home and watch stupid movies and eat junk food and forget about college and ghosts for a few days,' said Kylie. 'Okay?'

'Okay, honey.'

'We're here.'

'I see it. Hard to miss, huh?'

Steve turned the wheel and pulled into the firehouse, which not only boasted the prominent no-ghost sign, but also a colourful display of Christmas lights. In the foyer, Slimer was flying around in a Santa hat, humming 'Dec the Halls' to himself and draping tinsel on everything. As Kylie climbed out of her father's car, Slimer caught sight of her and flew over for a hug.

'What the –?' said Steve, also getting out of the car, and ducking as Slimer zipped past him.

'It's Slimer,' said Kylie, frowning at Steve. 'I told you about him. Slimer, this is my dad.'

Slimer smiled at Steve, and said something that was just audible as, 'Hi, My Dad!'

'Real cute, Slimer,' said Kylie, brushing tinsel detritus off her shoulder and making her way further into the building. 'Come on, Dad. This is Janine.' She gestured at Janine's desk. 'Janine, this is my dad, Steve. He wanted to come and meet everybody.'

'Well, great.' Janine looked up from her work and smiled. 'Hi, Steve. It's nice to meet you.'

'Hi,' Steve said, as Kylie grabbed his wrist and started dragging him towards the stairs.

'Come on,' she said. 'Let's get this over with.'


A short time later, Steve had made himself comfortable on the couch and was chatting with Roland and Garrett, while Kylie hovered nearby and looked awkward.

'Well, Mr Griffin,' Roland was saying, 'I don't know about dangerous so much as... unpredictable.'

'Roland, please call me Steve,' said Steve.

'Let's not mislead the man, Roland,' said Garrett. 'It can get dangerous, Steve. I mean, not all the time, but some of the time. For instance, Steve, did Kylie ever tell you about the time we were handcuffed to a plane that was being ripped apart by a gremlin?'

'What?' said Steve, horror-stricken.

'It was all thanks to me that we got out of that one alive, Steve.'

Kylie rolled her eyes and, with a noise of exasperation, rounded the corner into the kitchen where she found Eduardo taking a soda out of the fridge.

'What are you skulking back here for?' asked Kylie.

'Who's skulking?' said Eduardo. 'Anyway, you don't want me to talk to your dad, do you?'

'I don't care if you talk to my dad or not.'

'You don't seem to like Roland and Garrett doing it.'

'Then what difference could you possibly make? I didn't even want him to come here.'

'Why not?' Eduardo asked, in tones of great surprise.

'None of your business.'

'Fine.'

Eduardo stopped the conversation there, turning his back to Kylie to drink his soda. She tuned into her father's voice, which was saying stiffly in the next room, 'Oh, so you're Professor Spengler.'

Kylie hurried back to the lounge. Unsurprisingly, Egon had arrived; Steve had stood up, and was giving him an appraising look.

'My dad's honoured to meet you, Egon,' said Kylie. 'I've told him all about you and your work.'

'She's so excited to be taking your classes,' Steve said flatly.

'Well,' said Egon, 'Kylie's a wonderful student. They all are.'

'Did the original Ghostbusters never save your butt back in the day, Steve?' asked Garrett.

'No,' said Steve.

'Not directly, perhaps,' said Kylie. Then, quietly and through gritted teeth, she added, 'Dad, come on, you're being a jerk.'

The atmosphere had become thick, but then suddenly all that was dissipated by a loud alarm and flashing red light. Eduardo appeared and headed for the pole; Roland followed him; Garrett made his way to the elevator. Kylie took a moment to give her father a dirty look before going after them.


The Ecto-1 pulled up outside a deserted Christmas tree lot.

'Great,' said Kylie, wrinkling her nose in disgust as she stepped out of the car. 'It's one of those pine and fir mortuaries.'

'You're not going to start all that tree-hugging stuff again, are you?' said Garrett.

'No,' said Kylie. 'I just don't like these places. I mean, look how many trees they have left! They're not going to sell them all today, are they? So they'll be destroyed. It's disgusting.'

'Right,' said Eduardo. 'Beth always a gets a real one, made out of tinsel.'

'Come on, Kylie, don't be such a Scrooge,' said Roland. 'Nothing says Christmas like the smell of a real Christmas tree filling the house.'

'The needles fill the house as well,' said Kylie. 'You find them in the shower and in your bed and in your clothes well into February.'

'Well,' said Roland, 'it sounds like your family always buys the wrong kind of tree. Look, that guy over there is waving at us.'

'Be polite, Kylie, won't you?' said Garrett.

'Shut up,' said Kylie, as they began to approach the guy who was waving.

'Thank goodness you're here,' he said. He was a small, nervous man wearing a Santa hat. 'My name is Sanderson. I've been hiding in the portable restroom.'

'Very wise, Mr Sanderson,' said Roland. 'Can you tell us what happened?'

'Well,' said Sanderson, 'I don't know. It's just that... people started turning into trees! My customers, my salespeople, my secretary... they just turned into trees! Christmas trees,' he added, gesturing around him. 'Probably about half of these are my actual stock.'

'Check it out,' said Garrett, who had approached one of the trees with his PKE meter, and was examining the base of the trunk. 'This one's taken root in the asphalt.'

'I noticed that,' said Sanderson. 'That's how you can tell which trees are for sale.'

'The sawn-off ones, huh?' said Kylie. 'So you're in charge here and whatever is doing this missed you? I wonder how it would feel if it knew that.'

'It doesn't matter how it feels, Ky,' said Garrett. 'Let's just find it and kick its –'

'Look out!' Eduardo said suddenly, catching sight of a gust of visible wind and pine needles shooting towards them. Just in time, he grabbed Sanderson's arm and pulled him out of its path.

'That was it!' cried Sanderson, wobbling a little on his feet as he pointed at the entity, which was heading for the snow-topped mobile office building. 'That had to be it!'

'We're on it,' said Garrett, and set off in pursuit, followed by Roland and Kylie.

'You'd better get back in the portable restroom, man,' Eduardo said, before sprinting off after his teammates.


Roland and Kylie climbed the three steps up to the office door and let themselves in. Eduardo hung back on the second step, and Garrett stayed on ground level, for practical reasons. He was the only one who couldn't see the pine tree that had taken root behind the desk. Roland looked at his PKE meter and followed its signal to the window, which was open a crack.

'Looks like it went out the window,' he said. 'It must have opened it itself. No way would anyone have the window open in this weather.' He glanced at the tree by the desk.

'What,' said Eduardo, 'it can't phase through the wall? Well, this shouldn't be too hard.'

'Don't be an idiot, Eduardo,' said Kylie. 'It can open windows and turn people into trees. Don't you think that makes it just a little bit dangerous?'

'What's going on?' asked Garrett.

Eduardo turned to face him. 'It flew out the window.'

'So then let's get after it!'

'No need,' said Roland, stepping back from the window. 'It's coming after us!'

No sooner had he spoken than the gust of wind flew past his face, and then past Kylie's, blowing back her hair and forcing her to close her eyes against an onslaught of pine needles.

'Ugh,' she said, holding up a hand to shield her face. 'I hate pine needles!'

'What?' The gust of wind spoke, stopped moving and took on its humanoid form, in which it glared at Kylie with glowing green eyes. 'Despicable human! What right have you to hate us?'

Roland and Eduardo were both levelling their proton guns on the entity. Garrett was almost touching the bottom step, and sitting up in his chair to try and get a better look.

'I just mean,' said Kylie, looking at the pine cone- and needle-bedecked creature with interest, 'I think they should stay in the forest where they belong.'

The entity narrowed its eyes, and spoke again in its wind-like voice. 'Humans brought them here.'

'I know,' said Kylie.

'Where is he?' the entity demanded. 'Where is Sanderson?'

'I'm not telling you,' said Kylie.

'Then,' said the entity, 'you are as bad as the rest of them.'

With that, it took on its more abstract form and rushed at Kylie. She grabbed her proton pistol and fired, but the creature simply ducked out of the stream. It couldn't be held, but it did seem to be wounded – or at least winded – as it flew out of the window once again.

'Aw man!' said Eduardo. He looked at Roland. 'So why don't our blasters work against this one?'

'I don't know,' said Roland.

'I might have an idea,' said Kylie, reaching behind her for the trap she was carrying. 'I don't suppose this will do much good either, but it's worth – Eduardo, look out!'

Garrett was forced to duck as the gust of wind flew over his head, showering him in tiny pine needles, and then rushed past the steps and through the door. Eduardo was blown off the steps and landed on his rear. The entity made a beeline for Kylie. It took on its humanoid form again, but this time it made itself bigger and filled the room with a powerful wind that sent papers flying everywhere, pinned Roland against the wall and knocked Kylie off her feet. She tried opening the trap, but the entity simply knocked it out of her hands with an even more powerful gust of wind.

'Hey!' Eduardo was back on his feet and in the doorway, aiming his gun at the creature. 'Why don't you pick on somebody your own size?'

So saying, he aimed a blast of proton fire at the entity and hit it somewhere around the small of the back. The entity roared; pine needles flew everywhere (including Kylie's hair), and the thing shrunk to a miniature tornado and flew at Eduardo. He screamed, turned and ran pell-mell towards Mr Sanderson's display of pines and firs. Garrett turned his chair around and hurried after them.

Roland approached Kylie and held out a hand to her. She took it and pulled herself to her feet.

'You okay?' Roland asked.

'Yeah,' said Kylie, who was clawing at her hair like a woman gone mad. 'Pine needles aside. Gah! That'll teach me to take out my frustrations on an angry dryad.'

'An angry what?'

'Well,' said Kylie, 'I could be wrong. But if it is a dryad, that might explain why we can't trap it. It's a tree spirit, which means it's part of an actual tree.'

'So it's the old incomplete entity problem again?'

'Right. I do agree with it about the tree cull, but I guess we can't let it turn everybody into trees.' As she spoke, Kylie approached the tree by the desk and consulted her PKE meter.

'I guess that was Mr Sanderson's secretary,' said Roland.

'Makes sense,' said Kylie. Then she noticed a heavy binder on the desk, and started flicking through it. 'Roland, this could be useful. There's a stock inventory in here – it tells us where they sourced the trees. We could find that dryad's tree, and... and...'

'What?' said Roland. 'Cut it down?'

'Huh. Seems harsh.'

'Well, this thing is being pretty harsh itself.'

'Maybe I'm wrong about it being a dryad,' said Kylie, not sounding at all convinced. She closed the binder, picked it up and thrust it against Roland's abdomen. 'Take this to the car, will you? I'm going to see how Eduardo and Garrett are doing.'


The entity quickly overtook Eduardo, got up another huge gust of wind and knocked him to the ground, where it buried him in a pile of trees cut down in their prime. Eduardo dug his way to the surface, then found that the wind was assaulting his face, along with a quantity of pine needles.

'Where is Sanderson?' roared the entity.

'Don't tell him, Eddie!' Garrett's voice called to him.

'I wasn't going to!' Eduardo shouted back irritably.

'Then you are – ARGH!'

'As bad as the rest of them – I know,' said Garrett, shooting a blast of proton fire at the creature. Once again, it managed to break free. Eduardo aimed a stream at it, and again it broke free.

'Now what?' asked Garrett, his face turned away from the powerful wind.

'I don't know!' Eduardo shouted over the noise. The entity, however, did not come in for another attack. It shrunk to a flurry of green, and flitted away into the sky.

'Look at that, Eddie,' said Garrett, as Eduardo began to shake little flecks of green from all over his body. 'You found a brand new girl repellent. I hear some of them really hate pine needles.'

'Yeah, well,' Eduardo said, as a green shower rained from his hair. 'I can see why.'

It was at this point that Kylie caught up with them, saying, 'Good, you're okay. Oh, Eduardo! Just make sure you keep those pine needles to yourself, okay? What happened to the entity?'

'We scared it off,' said Eduardo.

'Right,' said Garrett. 'So it can go to another tree lot. I hope Egon knows how to defeat this thing.'

'Who needs Egon?' said Kylie. 'I know exactly what to do. Come on,' and she sprinted for the car.


They went back to the firehouse. Roland took the large binder to Janine's desk, and Garrett followed him. Eduardo, as he got out of the car, was tearing off his gloves with his teeth and scratching at his arms and neck.

'Are you allergic?' asked Kylie.

'Only when I get buried in, like, six of the stupid things.'

'See, you don't get that problem with a plastic one either! But anyway, this binder...'

'Don't you want to find out what your dad ended up doing to Egon?' Eduardo asked.

Kylie glared at him, but all the same she headed for the staircase instead of Janine's desk. Eduardo followed her, tucking his gloves under his right arm and picking at his left elbow pad.


Slimer was flying around the lounge area, still full of the joys of the season, this time wearing a mistletoe deely bopper. He flew at Kylie, kissed her messily before she had a chance to stop him and then tried his luck with Eduardo.

'I don't think so, muchacho,' Eduardo said, pushing him away with some force.

Slimer looked dejected for a moment. Then he cheered up in an instant, and phased through the floor to get to the people downstairs.


Egon and Steve were sitting together at the kitchen table. Steve was nursing a cup of coffee, and Egon was wiping green slime from his mouth with the back of his hand.

'Looks like they made up,' said Eduardo.

Kylie ignored him. She took a step towards Egon and Steve, demanding, 'What's going on?'

'Nothing's going on,' said Steve. 'Egon's just telling me about the classes you've taken with him.'

'Don't make Egon tell you things about me just because he's too polite to say no,' said Kylie. 'If I want you to know anything about my life, I'll tell you.'

Steve sighed heavily, stood up and made his way to the lounge, passing Kylie and Eduardo as he went. Kylie followed him first with her eyes, and then with her whole body. Egon stood up as well, and emptied two half-full coffee mugs into the sink.

'What happened, Eduardo?' he asked.

'We couldn't trap it,' said Eduardo, 'but Kylie thinks she knows why. You better ask her about it.'

Egon went to the kitchen doorway and looked round the corner at Kylie, who was engaged in a heated discussion with her father.

'Maybe you can just tell me the basics,' said Egon.

Eduardo was also looking at Kylie and Steve, his expression impassive. To Egon, he said, 'Garrett and Roland are downstairs looking at the tree lot's stock inventory with Janine.'

'And that'll help?'

'That's what they tell me.'

'All right then,' said Egon. 'We'd better go and join them.'


'I'm sorry, honey,' said Steve. 'It's just that Egon and I didn't have anything else to talk about. It really wasn't a big deal – he just told me you're a really good student. And why. But I didn't really understand the why part. Ghosts and science combined – it just went right over my head.'

'That's beside the point,' said Kylie. 'You were checking up on me. Why were you being so suspicious before we left?'

'Well,' Steve said awkwardly, 'can you blame me if I worry about... that?'

'I can't believe you!' said Kylie, really fuming now. 'Don't you trust me, or are you just inventing problems for me so you have an excuse to interfere?'

'Neither,' said Steve. 'I was just wrong, that's all. You're obviously happy working here, honey, and that's great. And I like Egon. He seems like he's a good teacher and a good boss.'

'He doesn't need your approval,' said Kylie. 'And neither do I.'

'Maybe I should give you some space,' said Steve. 'I'll go do some last-minute shopping. If you want anything special for Christmas, honey, this is your last chance to tell me.'

'I told you what I want for Christmas, and I told you what I don't want! I don't want any stupid presents, or any stupid Christmas dinner, and I don't want a stupid "real" Christmas tree stinking out my apartment and getting in my clothes and my bed and Pagan's litter box! Why don't you ever listen? I never liked your stupid daddy-daughter Christmases, even when I was a kid!'

'I'll, um, see you at the apartment,' said Steve. 'Or here. Wherever I find you first,' and he scuttled off towards the stairs.

'Not the apartment!' Kylie called after him. 'Mine!'

Then, finding herself quite alone, she stood for a moment to gather her thoughts. She took a deep breath, shook another load of pine needles from her hair and finally went downstairs.


Egon, Janine, Roland, Garrett and Eduardo were all gathered around the Christmas tree stock inventory. They looked up when they heard Kylie's approach.

'You okay, Ky?' asked Roland.

'Ugh,' she said. 'I just totally blew up at my dad, and I don't think he even deserved it. Well, most of it. Some of it. I guess these pine needles have put me in a bad mood.'

'If we defeat the dryad,' said Roland, 'maybe they'll disappear.'

'Ever the optimist,' said Kylie. 'Is it definitely a dryad, Egon?'

'I believe so,' said Egon. 'Well done, Kylie. We're currently implementing your suggestion to contact all of these stockists to see if we can locate the dryad's tree.'

'Two down, three to go,' said Janine, glaring at the telephone. 'Somebody else can make the next call. I'm already sick of being laughed at by tree fellers. Why do they need five suppliers anyway?'

'Ah,' said Garrett, 'who can fathom the mysteries of the Christmas tree salesmen? Like, what do they do for the other eleven months of the year? It's not like they can even start in September, like with all the non-living holiday gimmicks.'

'Egon,' said Kylie, 'I've just had a horrible thought. Did all those trees we saw today have dryads in them, before they were cut down?'

'Unlikely,' said Egon. 'Dryads are a dying breed. You'll be looking for a very old tree when you go searching for the source of this one.'

'To West Virginia and back in time for Christmas, huh?' said Garrett.

'It might not be West Virginia,' said Egon. 'It might be Pennsylvania. You can get there and back before tomorrow morning.'

'What's the hurry?' said Kylie. 'I wouldn't mind spending Christmas in the middle of a pine forest.'

'Me either,' said Eduardo.

'Oh,' said Roland, 'you guys!'

'Count me in too,' said Garrett. 'Going home for the holidays is actually sort of annoying. I know they mean well, but my parents seem to have some kind of mental block about handicapability.'

'I'm sorry you're all such Scrooges,' said Roland, 'but I for one want to be home for Christmas, so I'll make the next call.'

So saying, he reached for the phone on Janine's desk, just as it began to ring. He picked it up, and answered with the usual greeting: 'Ghostbusters.' Then he listened for a moment, grabbed a pad of paper and wrote something down. 'All right, we'll be there as soon as we can.'

Roland hung up, and addressed his next remark to the room at large. 'Not that we'll be able to do much. It's the dryad at another tree lot.'

'Well,' said Garrett, 'we can scare it off again.'

'And by then you can probably tell us if you've found a lead on our tree,' said Kylie, looking at Egon and Janine. 'Maybe we can even lead the dryad out of town, if we can let it know what we're doing.'

'You mean make it follow us?' asked Eduardo. 'And try to stop us? Why would we wanna do that? I say we let it stay here and do what it wants. It'll never even know what hit it.'

Kylie frowned at him. 'I take it you're assuming the effects of what it does aren't permanent.'

Eduardo shrugged, and said, 'Aren't we all?'

'At least a few dozen people living out their lives as trees rooted to the streets of Manhattan,' said Garrett. 'Now there's a thought. What would Mayor McShane say?'

'Not much,' said Eduardo. 'He'd have them uprooted and destroyed.'

'You'll be sorry if you're right,' said Kylie, narrowing her eyes at Eduardo.

'I'm sure it'll be fine, Kylie,' said Roland, who by this time had crossed the room and had one leg in the Ecto-1. 'I told the guy we'd be there. Let's go and see what we can do.'


In a Christmas tree lot that had so far escaped the wrath of the dryad, Steve Griffin was appraising a five-foot fir tree and listening to a saleswoman talk about it.

'Trust me,' she said. 'Don't want pine needles, don't get a pine tree! This is the perfect non-drop fir.'

'But it does drop some needles, right?' said Steve, looking doubtfully at the tree.

'Absolutely not!'

'I don't know. I don't think my daughter's too crazy about real Christmas trees anyway, whether they drop needles or not. I just thought... I don't know what I thought!'

'Is your daughter one of these green types?' asked the saleswoman.

'Well,' said Steve, 'I guess she is... to some extent.'

The woman beamed, and said, 'Good for her! Now, you might like to tell your daughter that real, sustainable Christmas trees – like ours – are much more environmentally friendly than the plastic variety. Not only do our suppliers replace all the trees they cut down, but plastic tees are almost always made from PVC, which is a petroleum derivative, not to mention the diesel fuel it takes to deliver them by ship from China...'

Steve stood there, tuning out the words, with a polite smile plastered to his face. A little way behind him, a brown and thinning tree was put into the chipping machine.