A/N: So I saw The Amazing Spider-Man 2. It hurts, just everything hurts. Please make it stop. I literally cried in the theatre, came home and listened to Home by Phillip Phillips the entire night and cried myself to sleep. Here, I was having Gwen and Peter feels. Say Something by A Great Big World is just them in a nutshell.
**WARNING: CONTAINS KIND OF SPOILER-ISH SPOILERS IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENS**
England. That's pretty far away. Really far away. But he can't. He can't lose her too. They're gone: his parents, Uncle Ben, Gwen's dad. They're all gone. How could he let her go too?
Her laugh is adorable. Even the crazy one she tried to make unlikable. It was great. She's great. And as he's laying there, her life in his hand, he can't help but think of how he loves her. Even with Harry's hands wrapped around his throat, she's all he thinks about. Her laugh, her eyes, her everything. She's everything he's always wanted; everything he's always needed.
She's smart. She's so smart, it's insane. Oxford. That's a huge opportunity for her. She's following her dreams, her own path. But she's his path. She's his everything. So he'll follow and be with her.
It feels like his foot is being crushed into a million pieces. Mostly because it kind of is right now. Spider-man. Who was he? A beacon of light at the end of the tunnel? Or the darkness that engulfs you before you can reach it? Keep Gwen out of it. Five simple words. Why the hell couldn't he follow them? Because it broke her heart. And it hurt to see her hurt.
In a flash the cogs are moving again and his brain is working overtime. Knock out Harry, save Gwen, don't die. Save Gwen. He has to save Gwen. So he makes quick work of Harry, his ferocity taking over, then fading away as he's jumping off the edge. He can't get to her quick enough. Faster, faster. It's almost over. The ground is nearing and he's running out of time.
Time. The one thing he doesn't have. There's not enough time, not enough hope, not enough love. He could never love her the way she should be. He isn't good for her. All of this—Spider-man, Peter Parker—who is he? It's too much, yet at the same time it's not enough. Never enough.
He's an idiot. He's such an idiot. Keep Gwen out of it. Why didn't he listen? Why didn't he let her go, keep her safe from this? From him. With one last attempt, he puts everything he has into this move. His arm swings and the web is shooting down fast towards her. He silently wills it to catch her, to take hold unlike so many of the others he tried. And when it sticks to her waist, he's so relieved. He quickly clings to the wall, tying the web to it.
He waits for a moment, catches his breath. Finally he makes his down. "Hey," he begins to say, but his voices is lost as he's looking at her, swinging from the web, motionless save from the momentum from the fall that swings her gently back and forth. He puts his arms around her and unhooks her. Nothing.
"Hey," he says again, "Gwen." And that's when he realizes. No, God no. He can feel the sting behind his eyes and he shakes his head, drops to the floor with her in his embrace. "Gwen, no. Come on, stay with me, stay with me."
He cups the back of her neck and picks her head up to look at her, as if she'd wake up any moment. Broken sobs and anguished yells break the silence in the dusty, old clock tower. "Don't give up on me, don't give up. Stay with me, Gwen," he murmurs through the tears, through the yells, through the heartbreak.
They'd broken up so many times before. For all of the same reasons. He couldn't put her in danger. He made a promise. And it wasn't Chief Stacy's choice to make, he knew that. But it didn't make him any less right. But every time he saw her it was like his heart had shattered into a million pieces. One piece for her smile, another for her eyes. Two more for her laugh. She was his everything. And no matter how many times his heart hurt, it would never feel like this.
The blood makes an appearance at last from her nostril and he cradles her against him, rocking back and forth. It isn't time. Not now, not yet. Murmurs of apologies mixed with salty tears echo through the room. How could life be so fragile? One wrong step and it's all over. It's not supposed to be like that. People are supposed to live their days until they're old and gray. Graduation, Oxford, England. Peter.
He was just starting to learn what it's like to be in love. That feeling of emptiness when they're not by your side and the butterflies in your stomach whenever you look at them, no matter how many times you have already. She taught him how to love.
He's sorry. He's so fucking sorry he couldn't get to her in time. The thing that there's never enough of, now there's too much. Too much time without her, too much time alone. Too much heartbreak. She's the one that he loves, but it's time to say goodbye.
