Androgyny
The three of them ? So lithe, so delicately featured, so ethereal - they were perfectly androgynous. Of them only Lucille could confidently be told as female and even then it was only because of her dress. Lucille had always thought that were something very odd about herself. That if she could merely identify what it was then perhaps it would go away. Ever since he was young her little brother had fascinated her. Something about the fact that he had a penis and she could touch him near whenever she wanted, especially at night, it was heaven. Of course, Mama had found out about them, had wanted to separate them and Mama'd had die. Though she, of course, did not want to admit it, sometimes she dreamt about being male or wondered what Thomas felt when she stimulated him or they had sex, but she did. She was already damned for having sex with Thomas when she was eight and he was six so why not solidify utterly her damnation with this oddity about her gender ? It was all frustrating to the highest degree.
As it started to rain she looked to either side of herself at Thomas and Gabriel. They were both clad in near matching black sack coats, suits, waistcoats and top hats. Both naturally curly haired or Gabriel's was at the least very wavy - Thomas's of onyx and Gabriel's of red-gold. Raindrops snuck under hat brims to slid down gloriously sharp cheek bones, trailed down the pale throats to disappear under stiff collars and ascots. By Jove, but it should've been a mortal sin to see such beauty everyday. Since she had forgotten to bring her parasol, Thomas was ever a gentleman and pro-offered her his sack coat, which she graciously accepted. Hmm, it was so nice and warm, musky and somewhat smoky too. It sparked an idea in her mind, surely, as they looked so very similar more so as twins than mere brother and...whatever she was, it would be easy for her to pass herself off as Thomas.
Later on after they'd returned to Thomas's hotel room, had their intercourse, and Thomas had fallen asleep, she and Gabriel were still awake. Gabriel reached over to smooth her hair, "You can do it, child, the act is not going to damn you it is part of who you are. Trust that I know of such matters." It made sense that their lover would indeed know such as Gabriel had both sets of sexual organs.
With tremulous hands and worse nerves she rolled from the bed. Since she had seen Thomas dress so many times it took her not long at'll to dress in one of Thomas's blouses then don the cobalt waistcoat, suit, and top hat. All the while she kept glancing back over her shoulder at him fearing that he would wake at any moment and wonder what she was doing. To her utter relief he did not leaving her to turn to Gabriel and ask quietly, "How do I look ?"
Gabriel smiled, those iron grey eyes alight, "Oh you look absolutely wonderful, darling. Why so long as you did not speak too much one should'st think you were a man."
It took her many days to become truly confident in the wearing of Thomas's clothes, but so she did then went outside with Gabriel. How queer, how empowering, to see the men defer without her being arm-in-arm with her little brother. How queerly pleasant to see some of the women they passed look at her then stem their giggles. Perhaps so long as Thomas did not find out...she could continue to do this ?
