'Ianto'
'Sir, I'm coming down the alleyway two across from you'
'Tosh?'
'You're closing in'
'Good thing it's only a' interference cut Ianto off.
''What the?'
'Jack?' asked Tosh.
BANG!
The alien bird man had disappeared and in his place stood a beautifully tantalizing woman, from her black heels to her red dress and black blazer. This was a woman you didn't mess with. She didn't appear to be armed but then where had the alien bird man go.
'Who the hell are you?' demanded Jack.
'Shame, he told me you had manners' she muttered.
Two guns were pointing in her face, Jack in front of her, Ianto behind.
'Ahh are you going to arrest me?' she asked.
'What did you do with the bird man?'
'I took care of him' she replied.
'What does that mean?' shouted Jack angrily.
'Listen just because you get a notification on your little rift monitor doesn't mean the alien is yours to deal with' she replied.
Tosh gulped from her end of the comms, how did whoever this woman was know about the rift monitor.
'Oops are you going to arrest me now I know about your little rift monitor' she said sarcastically.
'How did you know?'
'About Torchwood? Please, a little bird told me'.
Jack looked around for evidence of said bird.
'Oh please, not the alien bird. It's a figure of speech. I'd have thought with being surrounded by humans you'd have remembered some of your humanity Captain' she said.
Jack was getting paler by the second and thinking of a million ways he could retcon this woman immediately.
'We should listen to her' said Ianto, Jack glared at him 'what she's unarmed and we're pointing guns at her. Plus she did just take out that bird fellow'.
'Fine but we listen here. She seems far too eager to get to the base'
She rolled her eyes, so stupid.
'Talk now' Jack demanded.
'You can stop with the 'I'm so hard I can tear you down' act, it doesn't work on me' she replied.
'I'm warning you'.
She muttered something that sounded like 'big baby'.
'The Doctor sent me' she heard Jack gasp but ignored it, 'Not your Doctor, he's changed since then. He wears a tweed jacket with a bow tie and suspenders now. Anyhow he said it would be good for you and I to meet, compassion and all that'.
'Why would I show you compassion?'
'Because we are the same'
'We are not the same' he declared.
'You can't die. Well actually you do die a lot but you come back'
'So?'
'Well I don't die period. If someone tries to kill me the implement they chose disappears before touching me. Knifes, poison, fights you name it'
'How can that be?'
'You were made immortal Jack. I was born immortal' she replied.
'That's impossible there isn't a race of immortal species that exists'
'There was but just like the planet of Gallifrey it disappeared for all eternity. I am the only one left'
'And how was it that you became the last surviving immortal?'
'Not all races are kind as well you know. My planet became involved in battle, I am the last one left because I was not on the planet when the battle started'
'Then where were you?'
'Chained to the wall some thousands of miles away being inflicted by torture from my captors'
'You said you couldn't die'
'I can't'
'Then how were you tortured'
'Dying and causing harm are two different things. It's all about intent. If someone intends to kill me they won't reach their goal. If their intention is merely to cause me pain then I will be in pain'
'I'm not sure I understand'
She sighed, 'If you shot me right now with the intent of harming me but not killing me. I would get shot, blood would start pouring out and I would be in pain. The wound would close depending on how quickly or slowly you wanted my pain to be. Does it make sense now?'
'I think so'
'I know it's confusing'
'So basically it sucks to be you' said Ianto.
'Something like that' she replied.
'I still don't think we should trust her' muttered Jack.
'Jeez, if I knew you were going to be this much trouble, I would have demanded the Doctor to come with me. Or maybe you're just desperate to see him, I can flag him down if you desire' she said.
Jack growled,' No need'.
'Pity, the two of you together seems…interesting' she replied.
Jack still held the gun before her face whereas Ianto was slowly lowering his.
'Is he always this suspicious Ianto?' she asked, surprising the man by knowing his name.
'Always' he replied with a smirk.
'Pity, perhaps you'd be more fun than him' she said suggestively.
'What do you want?' demanded Jack.
'Ooh touchy. I came to hang out with your motley crew; the Doctor said it would be good for me. He didn't mention that you'd be rude though' she said.
'We don't need someone like you on the team' said Jack.
'Hmm, let's see. You have the very attractive, tea making, gun holding Ianto behind me, the overly sarcastic 'ladies' man' Owen as your doctor, the slightly irritating noisy cop Gwen and yourself but do you have anyone who can do this?' she asked.
Jack looked at her intently, his gun never wavering from her face as her hands began to heat up with a red glow, 'what are you doing?!' he demanded.
'Isn't it obvious, I'm creating fire' she said. The ball in her hand got bigger and brighter until you could clearly see the flames cackling inside. Suddenly it was gone; Jack whipped his head around trying to find it.
'It's gone' she said, 'Didn't want to do any unnecessary damage, as much as I would have liked to have singed you a little'.
'How?' he asked.
'Oh that's just the tip of the iceberg. Don't mess me with me kay?! Now I'm really cold wore the wrong outfit see, also quite hungry. Do you think we could resume this conversation back at your base?' she asked.
'No, absolutely not! You aren't coming with us!' shouted Jack.
She rolled her eyes, 'Didn't even ask for my name' she tuted, 'Very well'. She turned to face Ianto whispering with a wink, 'See you later', before she became a blur that disappeared before their eyes.
'Jack…' began Ianto.
'I don't want to hear it' said Jack, 'Let's get back. Tosh I want you to run every programme, I want to know who that woman was' he growled.
'But Jack...' she said.
'What?!'
'We don't even know her name' she replied.
Jack stared straight ahead poised like a coiled spring, 'fuck' he cursed.
It was Ianto remarked a very quiet drive back.
Jack was furious, he didn't know what game the Doctor was playing but when Jack next lay eyes on him there would be hell to play. Of course he wasn't going to invite that girl back to the base, he scarcely believed anything she had said and it was obvious to him that she was dangerous. The fact that he found her incredibly attractive did nothing to dissuade his suspicions. Ianto had been oddly quiet on the journey back; Jack suspected it was because he was suspicious of the girl as well and not because she had winked at him.
Upon return Jack began shouting orders to everyone, Tosh and Owen had the sense not to laugh in his face – neither were as suspicious of the strange woman as their boss was – and Gwen came out of the woodwork, worming her way to Jack's side. It was pathetic that she still tried it on with him and though Ianto knew there was nothing to it on Jack's part, her behavior deeply irritated him.
So absorbed were they all that they didn't notice the invisible lift lower into the base with someone on top of it.
She surveyed the area as she made her decent, really they were completely oblivious to her presence, not at all becoming – weren't they supposed to be trained in attack and defense. Clearly the Doctor had been lying about certain things.
She had changed from the ensemble she'd been wearing earlier. She now wore; tan heels, tight light blue skinny jeans, a white tank top and a dusty pink blazer. She looked hot and she knew it.
'You know I always thought this place would be bigger' she said announcing her presence.
She was rewarded with the sight of four guns pointing in her direction – Ianto hadn't raised his gun and was looking at her with quite an amused expression on his face.
'How did you get in here?!' demanded Jack.
'Oh please a genius could work that out but I hear you aren't one, perhaps Tosh could answer your question' she replied with a cheeky smile.
Jack growled, 'I asked you a question!'
'Jeez, relax, you are so boring but so much fun to play with. I took a ride on the invisible lift. You people should really up your defense on this place you're getting sloppy' she said.
'Give me one good reason not to shoot you' said Jack.
She laughed, 'Jack honey, if you had wanted to shoot me you'd have done it already but I do actually have a reason for being here. I bought you an automated message from The Doctor himself, he's very unhappy with you' she replied, chucking a small device at his feet.
'You do ahead and listen to that, I'll just be sitting here reading this magazine' she said sitting down and taking a gossip mag out of the back pocket of her jeans.
Jack stood staring at her a moment longer, his eye twitching slightly before he picked the item up. There were now only three guns pointed to her head – Tosh having lowered hers but she wasn't bothered.
Jack pressed the play button on the device and an image was projected out, it was the Doctor but not his Doctor. He looked cross.
'Do you have any idea what important thing I was doing when I get a call saying that you haven't cooperated and pointed a gun at her head? If I had known you would have acted so babyish I would have come to see you myself. Everything she had said to you is true, she is immortal in a way similar to you, and she is an extraordinary person that you would do well not to get on the bad side of. She is going to stay with you indefinitely, put her on the team or you'll regret it' the message ended and the image faded away.
Now it was only Gwen's gun that remained pointed at her head.
Jack did not look pleased, 'What is your name?'
She smirked, 'Alexandria Wells but you can call me Lexi'.
'Gwen lower your gun' he said gruffly.
'You can't honestly trust her!' cried the badly dressed woman, 'she doesn't belong on the team, she belongs in a cell'.
Lexi laughed.
'What are you laughing at?' shouted Gwen.
Lexi winked at Ianto before responding.
'Three things actually' replied Lexi.
'Which are' growled Gwen her face impossibly red.
'Well for one, your outfit is hideous, I mean did you look in the mirror before you got dressed? Or did you actually think that a man would find that outfit attractive? Secondly you're obviously jealous of my appearance, I don't blame you – I know I'm hot. You've spent half a year panting after a guy who already has a partner and is so not into you it couldn't be more obvious. Yet you're still trying to force yourself on him – which quite frankly is disgusting to watch and don't you think a little rude considering that you're married? Thirdly, - and I'm just reading off reactions here – no one likes you. You're rude, manipulative, a liar, a cheat and just generally not a nice person' said Lexi.
The rest of the team looked stunned while Gwen attempted to throw herself at the young woman.
'I'm going to stop you there' said Lexi throwing up an invisible force field around Gwen that kept her captive, 'if you think I'm going to let you attack me you'd be wrong. I happen to like the clothes I'm wearing and if you touch them I'll likely have to burn them. I don't know what it is y'all doing around here but I need to go shopping and I'd like to take Ianto and Tosh with me'.
She paused, her eyes twinkling and added a seductive tone of voice, 'is that alright boss, I promise I'll bring you back a present'.
Jack looked dumbfounded, opening and closing his mouth several times.
'Well I'd love to come shopping, I doubt anyone needs me for tea or coffee' said Ianto.
'And I believe I could learn a lot about fashion from you – those shoes are amazing' gushed Tosh, squealing like a girl and surprising everyone.
'That's settled then, we'll be back in a couple of hours. Jack honey I recommend locking yourself in your office once I release Gwen, I doubt Ianto wants her pawing at you either' said Lexi before taking Tosh and Ianto with her on the invisible lift.
