p style="font-family: -webkit-standard;" /p
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard;"span style="text-decoration: underline;"emAuthor's Note/em/span/p
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard;"emJust to give you an idea of what you're getting into: this story was meant to serve as a punch line to a religious rape joke. Yep. No need to explain further than that. Uh, have fun, and sorry if I offended you...?/em/p
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard;"emAs for this story... I have no idea where I'm going with this. For the few chapters I've already written, I simply slam my head against a keyboard until the white keys get a bit red then spell check whatever nonsense came out of that./em/p
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard;"emI think it's also important to mention that for the first few chapters were written by a person who has never poked a Bible before. Don't worry, intensive Biblical reading shall commence in order to offend you people more accurately./em/p
hr style="color: #000000; font-family: -webkit-standard;" noshade="noshade" size="1" /
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard; text-align: left;"Edited 12.12.15: Reduced the amount of potential groans to be induced from the reader, gave Prelude narrator a personality, Gangly Prophets merged into one supreme being, schizophrenia now mentioned no less than four separate times, Jeff quietly removed/p
hr style="color: #000000; font-family: -webkit-standard;" noshade="noshade" size="1" /
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard; text-align: center;"strongPrelude/strong/p
hr style="color: #000000; font-family: -webkit-standard;" noshade="noshade" size="1" /
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard; text-align: center;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"When you develop a spontaneous case of schizophrenia, your first instinct is to assume that your mental stability isn't in peak form. Because, duh, you're hearing voices. Come on, that's a crazy person thing. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"But, after a brief round of intensive googling, there appears to be a few inconsistencies with my self-diagnosis. Schizophrenia is a long term disease, usually lasting from several years to an entire lifetime. Let's just say that it's pretty unlikely to have a one-week stint with it. Most of the afflicted also tend to not have the equivalent of a full-length audiobook broadcasted into their head. So I either have an extremely rare case of the disorder or a magic, telepathic angel was narrating his autobiography to me. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"Then again, isn't schizophrenia all about having difficulties discerning reality from personal delusions? Who knows? It doesn't even have to be schizophrenia. There could hundreds of other disorders that might be more fitting. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"I started hearing the voice right in the middle of finals week. I'm sure you could understand that I was a bit too busy to seek immediate medical attention. I did transcribe most of what the voice said so I would have something more concrete to show to a professional. By the time I was all finished up with finals, the voice stopped speaking. At that point, I felt that if all my problems have already gone away, then what was the point in seeking help? Against all of my better judgements, I still haven't gone to a psychologist. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"I did show the transcripts to a few friends. By few, I mean two. Friend #1 said something along the lines of, "Neat bible fanfic. Maybe I might be able to turn it into a mediocre webcomic." Friend #2 started babbling about something about reincarnations and prophets. To be honest, I wasn't really paying attention. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"So, if you're the least bit interested in reading the ravings of a temporary lunatic, then continue on. Nobody's stopping you. Or you could leave. I won't judge you for it. /p
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard;"span style="text-decoration: underline;"emAuthor's Note/em/span/p
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard;"emJust to give you an idea of what you're getting into: this story was meant to serve as a punch line to a religious rape joke. Yep. No need to explain further than that. Uh, have fun, and sorry if I offended you...?/em/p
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard;"emAs for this story... I have no idea where I'm going with this. For the few chapters I've already written, I simply slam my head against a keyboard until the white keys get a bit red then spell check whatever nonsense came out of that./em/p
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard;"emI think it's also important to mention that for the first few chapters were written by a person who has never poked a Bible before. Don't worry, intensive Biblical reading shall commence in order to offend you people more accurately./em/p
hr style="color: #000000; font-family: -webkit-standard;" noshade="noshade" size="1" /
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard; text-align: left;"Edited 12.12.15: Reduced the amount of potential groans to be induced from the reader, gave Prelude narrator a personality, Gangly Prophets merged into one supreme being, schizophrenia now mentioned no less than four separate times, Jeff quietly removed/p
hr style="color: #000000; font-family: -webkit-standard;" noshade="noshade" size="1" /
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard; text-align: center;"strongPrelude/strong/p
hr style="color: #000000; font-family: -webkit-standard;" noshade="noshade" size="1" /
p style="font-family: -webkit-standard; text-align: center;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"When you develop a spontaneous case of schizophrenia, your first instinct is to assume that your mental stability isn't in peak form. Because, duh, you're hearing voices. Come on, that's a crazy person thing. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"But, after a brief round of intensive googling, there appears to be a few inconsistencies with my self-diagnosis. Schizophrenia is a long term disease, usually lasting from several years to an entire lifetime. Let's just say that it's pretty unlikely to have a one-week stint with it. Most of the afflicted also tend to not have the equivalent of a full-length audiobook broadcasted into their head. So I either have an extremely rare case of the disorder or a magic, telepathic angel was narrating his autobiography to me. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"Then again, isn't schizophrenia all about having difficulties discerning reality from personal delusions? Who knows? It doesn't even have to be schizophrenia. There could hundreds of other disorders that might be more fitting. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"I started hearing the voice right in the middle of finals week. I'm sure you could understand that I was a bit too busy to seek immediate medical attention. I did transcribe most of what the voice said so I would have something more concrete to show to a professional. By the time I was all finished up with finals, the voice stopped speaking. At that point, I felt that if all my problems have already gone away, then what was the point in seeking help? Against all of my better judgements, I still haven't gone to a psychologist. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"I did show the transcripts to a few friends. By few, I mean two. Friend #1 said something along the lines of, "Neat bible fanfic. Maybe I might be able to turn it into a mediocre webcomic." Friend #2 started babbling about something about reincarnations and prophets. To be honest, I wasn't really paying attention. /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;" /p
p style="color: #222222; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;"So, if you're the least bit interested in reading the ravings of a temporary lunatic, then continue on. Nobody's stopping you. Or you could leave. I won't judge you for it. /p
