OK Lynda Babe, this one is for you. Just a little "Fun with Les" one-shot to make you smile. Hope you feel better soon my babe-in-crime! :-P Love ya! ~~ Jackie

LPOV

I am going to kill Stephanie Michelle Plum! Wait, no, that's too drastic. It would kill me and all the guys if something happened to our light. And besides Ram would have my ass!

I do however have to find a way to get back at her for the "Old Lady Stripshow" she tricked me into. But what? I have been racking my brain for over a month for the perfect revenge. Ah ha, got it!

I make my way to the break room to plot my revenge. I sit down at one of the tables with my back to the door. I know mistake in most cases, but I could care less at the moment.

I am so smart. Steph will never know what hit her! I am busy on my phone making arrangements in no time at all.

Mystery MM POV

I walked quietly into the break room to get a bottle of water. I notice Les sitting at one of the back tables, back to the door. Dumb ass. He is talking, quite loudly on the phone. I hear Steph's name and I perk up my ears to listen.

I can't believe what I am hearing. Les is planning to try to prank Bomber again. Once again I think, 'what a dumb ass!' He will never stop trying to get her back for that stripper thing. Now that was some funny stuff right there. The pictures Bomber shared proved it. I try to hold my laughter in so as not to let on to Les that I am listening.

You jerk! she would never fall for that. Especially when I let her know what's going on.

I turn to leave the break room. As I walk back to my cubby I put my plan into motion. I pull my cell phone off of my hip and dial Steph. She answers after 3 rings.

"Hey handsome, what can I do for you?" She asks as she picks up.

"Hey Bomber, I think we need to talk. Les is up to no good again. He's planning something to get back at you. I just wanted to give you a heads up." I explain.

"Thank-you. That is very sweet of you. Then again you are the sweetest guy I know. And now you are my favorite Merry Man too! Thanks for the warning sweetie." She adds.

I hang up the phone trying to control the blush spreading across my face, but it's no use. I can feel my cheeks burning.

Steph shows up at my cubby minutes later and I tell her every part of Lester's plan that I over-heard.

"That little shit!" She says. "Does he think I would fall for that? No way!"

"I don't know Bomber, he does seem a lot more stupid when it comes to his pranking you." I tell her.

"Well, not this time. I have just the way to turn the tables on him." She winks as she tells me just how she is planning to do so.

I can only smile big as I think of just what she has in mind. I tell her not to forget the pictures. This I've GOT to see!

LPOV

I am so deviously brilliant. She won't know what hit her. I chuckle to myself as I leave the break room. Now I have to find Beautiful and put my plan into motion.

I walk out onto the 5th floor working area and find her sitting at her cubby, working hard as usual. I grin big as I lean down to kiss her cheek and speak to her.

"Afternoon Beautiful, I see you're hard at work. That hard-ass Boss of ours must be so proud of you."

"Yes Lester, I, unlike you; earn my paycheck." She teases.

"How would you like to earn a big bonus from your best friend, me?" I inquire.

She looks up at me with question in her eyes. And seems almost timid as she asks.

"Just what do you have in mind Les? And how much are you willing to pay?"

"Well, I'm willing to pony up a cool $1,000 for this little job."

"Really?! It must be really dangerous, or really embarrassing. Which is it Les?"

"Neither Beautiful, you know I would never put you in serious danger and I am finally admitting to defeat in trying to embarrass you any more." I admit.

"Well then, I am intrigued. What do you want me to do for you?"

"You know about the Rangeman party that Ranger is planning for us, you know to reward us for all our hard work this year?"

"Yea Les, what about it?"

"Well I want to give the guys a special treat too, at the party; and I need your help."

"Again Les, what do you need my help with?"

"I'm having Tasty Pastry bake me this huge cake. You know, the huge ones that people jump out of for surprises. I think the guys would get a kick out of you jumping out of one for them."

"And what would I be wearing Les? I am NOT jumping out of this thing naked. So you can just forget that idea if that's what you're thinking! And besides, Ram would kick your ass!"

"Nah, I was thinking you wearing your Rangeman uniform, but if you want to go small and tight with it, I won't argue." I give her my patented Santos eyebrow wiggle.

"OK, that sounds harmless enough. I'm in. And after I jump out, I'll give all the guys huge hugs and kisses." She giggles.

"What ever you want to do is fine Beautiful. Thank-you for agreeing to do this for me. The guys are going to love it." I say as I give her a kiss on the cheek again and turn to walk away.

Now to sneak my way up to the 3rd floor where Bobby's medical offices are. I need to procure some sedative for the devious part of my plan. I am planning to knock Steph out and "change" her attire for her big appearance. I sneak into Bobby's medical supplies and swipe what I need. This is too easy!

I am laughing inside as I walk back to my office. You are going down Beautiful!

SPOV

This is too easy! Les is so gullible. I can not wait to see his face this time. And I promised to get pics for my new favorite Merry Man and my man Ram, too. Hehehe!

My new favorite Merry Man has just texted me to inform me of some new information in Les' plan. He has been seen stealing a sedative from Bobby's medical stores. Don't he know that there are cameras there too. Idiot! He is actually planning to knock me out. Is there no limit to his deviancy?!

But I have him covered there too, his syringe has been replaced with a placebo, so I will retain all my senses for my revenge. Ha!

I make a phone call to make sure my part in the table turning is available for the night. I am not disappointed. I giggle with glee.

4 Days Later ... the night of the Rangeman party

LPOV

Tonight is the night. I will finally get my revenge on Beautiful for the whole "stripper" fiasco. I can hardly wait! She will not know what hit her, literally. I finger the syringe in my pocket as I make my way to her cubby. She should be just finishing up with her work and about to get ready for the party by now.

I am right, just as I ease up to her cubby she is shutting down her computer for the day. I toss a friendly smile to her as I begin to talk.

"Hey Beautiful, you almost ready for the party. It's less than an hour away now. The cake I ordered has just been delivered. You want to take a look at it?"

"Sure, why not? Let's see if it is up to my dessert standards." She laughs.

I take her arm in mine and lead her to the largest conference room where Ella has been particularly busy decorating and setting up food and drinks. It looks great. My cake is in the corner of the room.

It is a large 4 tier creation with light blue and white icing. I have to admit it is a work of art. Steph takes one look and immediately starts to drool as a glazed look comes to her eyes.

"It is beautiful. And it looks big enough for me to fit in, too." She observes.

She now has her back to me so I take my chance. I pull the syringe from my pocket and slowly make my way to her. She is so engrossed in the cake that she doesn't even feel when I inject the sedative into her hip. I chuckle as I pick her up and take her to my apartment to change her clothes.

When we reach my apartment on 4, I put my plan into motion as I pull off her Rangeman uniform and change her into my uniform for the night.

I have chosen all black, in honor of the official Rangeman colors. She is now wearing a tiny pair of lacy black bikini panties and a matching bra. I have also added black fishnet stockings and 4-inch black killer pumps. I adjust myself in my cargos as I look down at her. Down boy!

I am ecstatic with the results. She should be out for about another hour, so I leave to check and see if Ella needs any help in the conference room. I walk out of my apartment and down the stairs.

SPOV

That little prick, and I mean that literally! He actually did stick me with a needle to knock me out. That's it Santos, you're going down!

I grab my cell phone off of my hip and dial my back-up. I get an answer before the first ring is complete. I laugh as I utter.

"It's time. Come on and bring me a change of clothes."

I hear an affirmative answer just before the click of the phone disconnecting. Good, it's all a go!

I put my phone back in it's holder and close my eyes to continue my "act" of sleep and wait for Les to return.

LPOV

Ella seems to have everything covered nicely so I leave the conference room and head back up to my apartment to retrieve Steph.

As I walk into the bedroom of my place, I see Steph is just as I left her. Good.

I walk over and gently pick her up for the ride down to the conference room. No one is around as I make my journey down. Even better for me.

I walk over to the cake and open the trap door on the bottom. This part is going to be tricky. But I finally get Steph situated in the cake and close the trap door up again.

I smile to myself as I turn to leave. I have to go back up to my apartment and get ready for the party myself. It starts in 30 minutes. I laugh to myself as I jog up the stairs. The Gods are smiling down on Lester Santos today.

SPOV

A few minutes after I hear Les walk back out of the room, I feel the trap door below me release. I peek my head out to see just who I was hoping for.

I get a huge grin as I shimmy out of the cake bottom. I look to my accomplice and whisper.

"Quick, we have to get out clothes switched. Everyone will be arriving in less than 10 minutes."

I get a nod and an evil grin in return. We change clothes as fast as we can. I put on the clothes she has brought for me, jeans and a stretchy pink T-shirt; and she puts on the horrendous outfit Les has picked out for me. Every single stitch of it, including the shoes.

After we have switched out our clothes, I help her climb in the bottom of the cake and close the trap door behind her. I then quickly hide myself in the closet in the corner that we keep some of the electrical equipment in for our slide shows during meetings.

I giggle to myself. This is gonna be SO good! I can hardly wait to see Lester's face, and capture it on film of course!

LPOV

It takes me 20 minutes to shower, dress, shave, and get myself presentable for the party. I look damn good if I do say so myself. But then again this is the Lester Santos we're talking about here, did you expect anything less?

I hurry to get out the door and down stairs, barely remembering to grab my camera on the way out.

When I get to the conference room, I am happy to see that nearly all of Rangeman is there. I am not surprised to see that Ranger has also invited Connie, Lula, Mary Lou, and Steph's family as well. She is going to be mortified. I can hardly contain my excitement.

After I make my rounds, shaking hands and hugging the ladies; I start. I hear Steph shuffling around inside the cake, so it is time to get this show on the road.

"Attention!" I shout out.

All conversation comes to a halt and all eyes are now on me. Good.

"I have a special surprise for all of my Rangeman brothers and of course our special guests too. I bought this cake and arranged for a very special friend of all of us to make an appearance."

I now have everyone's undivided attention as I make my way up to the cake. I can hear Steph getting more restless inside. I lean over the top and make a small tear in the "paper" top to the cake. I lean closer and whisper to her. "It's show time Beautiful, come on out."

I step back and prepare for action.

The top of the cake bursts open and my jaw hits the floor! It's not Steph that has popped out. OMFG! It's her Grandma Mazur. And I feel my lunch making its way back up from my stomach. She is wearing the outfit I picked out for Steph!

Heaven help us, all of her sagging, stretched, and wrinkly skin is showing. I hear a giggle and the clicks of a camera to my right. I turn to see Steph, dressed in normal clothes and laughing her ass off as she snaps pictures of my totally shocked face.

"What's the matter Santos? Not what you were expecting?" She asks between bursts of laughter.

I am still to shocked to answer right away. And damn it, the whole room is laughing at me and taking photos. I am finally able to find my voice and I squeak out.

"Fuck. Will I ever learn?"

"No, obviously not Les. Are you going to give up trying to pull one over on me now?" Steph asks.

"No, this is war Plum!" I shout.

"Santos ... mats 0500!" I hear Ram's voice growl out to my left, where he is standing with his arm around Steph.

"What? Why?" I stutter.

"You dare ask why?! First, you plan to knock my woman out with a sedative, then you try to trick her into jumping out of a cake wearing no more than a stripper would. Not to mention that you had to take her clothes off yourself to change her into that outfit. You are getting your ass kicked, deal with it!" He roars.

I visibly gulp as I realize he is right. I went too far. I will own up to my punishment like a man. Even though I think that seeing Steph's Grandma Mazur in that outfit was almost punishment enough.

I then hear Bobby growl from behind me. "I'm next Santos! Mats ... 0600! I owe you an ass kicking too for stealing from my medical supplies."

I can not believe that I hear most of my co-workers agree with him and they all call me to the mats! Every single one of them, Ranger, Tank, Hector, Hal, Cal, Woody, Vince, Binkie, Zip, Zero; hell they all think I should get my ass kicked for disrespecting Steph like I did. And what can I say? I don't blame them one bit. I deserve every single pain I have to endure!

"OK let's all have some fun now." Steph announces.

She walks over to her Grandma and pulls a coat over her, thank God! With her covered I think I can actually enjoy the party now. Well, am I ever really going to get the better of Stephanie Plum? I just may figure out a way one day... just maybe.

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