I want this to happen on the show, but since it probably won't, I'm putting my imagination into play. This two-part story will be super angsty, but I promise there will be an uplifting ending. :)


I'm Sorry. I Can't.

Written by WriterFreak001

Part 1

~ SCORPION ~


"I tried to hate you, to forgive you, all just to forget you, but I'm only capable of loving you. You're tattooed onto my skin, and the more I try to erase you, the deeper you sink in." ― Llarjme, Missing Variables


Paige never wanted to see that stupid jerk's face ever again.

How dare he integrate himself into her life, make her feel special and appreciated, make her think he wanted a future with her, make her believe there was something more to their relationship than comfort and companionship only to head off to a different country for a new job opportunity and destroy her trust, destroy their relationship, destroy everything she's sacrificed to be with him in a matter of weeks! How DARE he?!

How dare he toy with her emotions and use her the way he did?! How dare he show any affection towards her and her son and make them think things could work, when, obviously, he only cared about having the sex she never gave him! In any of the months they had been together, Paige tried to move on with him and tried to be a satisfying sexual partner, but when it came down to them on the bed, making out with him on top of her, her underneath him, she was never able to follow through; no matter how many times she tried to convince herself that she should want to be with Tim in an intimate capacity, she could never force herself to ever want him in that way.

BUT STILL, BOYFRIENDS DO NOT CHEAT ON THEIR GIRLFRIENDS. PERIOD.

She didn't care if he was sexually frustrated, or if he thought he needed an escort to release that tension with! He shouldn't have cheated on her! She would have gotten there, eventually, but walking away from love was not something she could have done overnight, and though she's been in a relationship with Tim for many months, her feelings for Walter were deeper than she realized, and she just… she couldn't completely give herself to Tim when she still loved another man.

Tim knew she had a complicated history with Walter; he knew she still had feelings for him, and he still stared right into her eyes and told her he was okay with moving slow and waiting for her to be ready for him, but OHHH NO!

He just couldn't live up to that promise, could he?!

Paige inhaled deeply and rubbed her eyes, grateful her son was out for the night with Sylvester to witness the chaos and disarray of her broken heart. She might have not loved Tim, not in a way she loves Walter, but Tim had given her a small glimmer of hope that she could possibly move on with him… that she could – one day – love him, but it was now apparent that he never saw them having a future together. She was just a pastime to him, nothing more.

If she ever saw him again, he would regret messing with her heart and thinking it was okay to play with her emotions when he knew she had feelings for Walter. She hated him! She absolutely hated him! How could she let herself fall for his charm so easily? She and Walter could have been together by now. They could be dating and happy and so in love, but she had ruined any chance of ever being with him by dating another man, continuously and ceaselessly breaking Walter's heart every time she kissed or hugged Tim in front of him.

Flaunting Tim wasn't done intentionally, but subconsciously, she guessed, she wanted Walter to see what he was missing, and maybe she had lead Tim on at first, but the more she was with him, the more he seemed undeniably perfect. He was everything she ever wanted in a man, growing up, but she knew now that Walter was more than just everything to her.

Paige buried her face into her hands and stifled a sob.

She was such an idiot. A stupid, stupid idiot, and she hated herself for it because the one man she would want to share her life with wouldn't want to be with her anymore. She had pushed him away, and she had no right to bring him back. Not after the way she had treated him.

Walter O'Brien didn't deserve her, and it wouldn't be fair for Paige to tell him how she feels with how she treated him.

No matter how much she still loved him, no matter how much she wanted to be the one he kissed at night and cuddled with whenever he wanted, any relationship with Walter would never happen.

He would never trust her again if he found out about space, and that possibility scared her more than anything else. A life without Walter – in any capacity – wasn't something she would ever want to experience. She loved him way too much.

Paige gathered her legs into her arms and buried her face against her knees, crying deeply but quietly. Her world was falling apart.

~ SCORPION ~

Walter's left pinky twitched over the keyboard for an undeterminable amount of time, his anger suddenly growing with every second. She knew! She knew he loved her, and she still chosehim!

He felt like he couldn't breathe; how could Paige do this to him?! How could she willingly wave Tim around like a trophy and flaunt their relationship IN FRONT OF HIM?! Every time he kissed her, every time Tim had his grimy hands around her as she leaned into him made Walter want to run away and vomit, repeatedly. And just knowing that she knew he loved her made those small, repulsive moments even more revolting.

He had told her in so many words that he loved her, and even though she was speaking through his fantasies, she still told him she loved him too. Was all of that, everything that she said, a lie? Was she just lying to him to save his life? He would honestly prefer dying in space because death would have been a much more pleasant experience than the constant pain he had been feeling these past few months.

He had showed her, in his own, strange way, that she meant more to him than anybody. He was always worried about her, concerned for her safety, asking about her day and making sure she was comfortable in everything she was doing. He brought her coffee in the morning and even brewed it with cinnamon because he knew it was what she liked. He thought giving her special treatment was showing her that he loved her, and though he didn't know about his feelings at the time, Paige wasn't an idiot. She should have known, beforehand, that he wanted her in his life despite backing away when they first kissed, despite suggesting for them to stay professional, despite him refuting everything everyone else was saying about how he felt about her.

She should have known.

Granted, he did have a momentary lapse of judgment when he started dating Linda, but his relationship with her was short-lived and made him realize there was only one woman he would ever truly be happy with. But why couldn't Paige see that?! Why couldn't Paige – the one woman who read emotions better than anybody he knew – see that she was his "special person?!"

Was he not obvious enough?!

Before the interloper arrived and destroyed his chances with Paige, she accepted him for who he was, ate fermented fish with him and smiled and laughed at everything he said. He thought she had been reciprocating his feelings for her, but after everything that happened lately, he realized he was wrong.

Perhaps she never actually loved him.

Perhaps her words were all a ruse to save him because she knew he would listen.

Walter flared his nose and clenched his fingers as tight as possible. Paige was in for a rough awakening tonight. Gritting his teeth, Walter sprang from his chair and grabbed his keys before racing towards the car, not caring about the abandoned Baked Alaska he had left on his desk.

He never felt more betrayed.

Any glimmer of hope he had had for salvaging his relationship with Paige was gone, and even if he still loved her, still want to be with her and hold her and wake up with her every morning for the rest of his life, he couldn't have a future with someone he couldn't trust.

He should want to hate her and never want her working for his company again. He should want to place as much distance from her as possible, but no matter what he was currently feeling, a life without Paige Dineen, even if she would never be his, wasn't an option.

He had fallen so hard for her, and he doubted he would ever stop falling, but a romantic relationship with Paige could never happen. And he hated himself for ever falling in love in the first place because loving her was too damn painful.

It ruined his life.

~ SCORPION ~


This is going to be a two-part story.

The next will have more angst but will end happily, I promise. ;)