Welcome, Readers.
Before you can travel through this chaotic world of insanity, there are a few things you should know.
First of all, our stories star ourselves: J. Whitnee, and Silver Leafx.
For the sake of not having to type so much, we will be known as "Whit", and "Silver".
In our story that will soon be told, we feature many of the OCs from our other, glorious fictions.
For the full benefit of the special, we recommend you read them, or just enough to get the charactors down.
Not only will we feature OCs, we will be bringing to you many of our co-authors and friends of fan fiction, just to join the insanity.
In this prologue, some mentioned are CyberWolf101, who will be known as simple "Wolf"
And the wonderful DevoTheMadCashCow, who will be simply known as "Devo".
Later on, more and more authors will be introduced to you as we travel through the year, giving you our chaotic stories of all our favorite holidays.
Christmas, New Year's, Valentines, St. Patrick's…you name it, we'll include it.
Even a bit of foreign holidays that aren't normally celebrated in America.
If you want us to include a certain holiday, be our guest and PM us about it!
Reviews are gladly appreciated, but what we really want is your entertainment.
Don't get us wrong, our specials are NOTHING compared to those Christmas specials you see.
Or Valentine romance.
No, for we have bald Stantlers,
Santas for murder victims,
Some unexpected crisis,
Purple ninjas and Alien politics.
So come, join the insanity, the randomness, and laugh your ass off.
*All comments made in this fiction are for entertainment's purpose only. If you have any issues with the content, PM us with your concerns*
This is the SmahGreyBeach Version. To get the most fun out of these specials, also read "Holiday Parodies: EbilPurpleNinja Version".
Why is it SmahGreyBeach?
1) Grey is Hot
2) I love him
3) He is mine.
Enjoy.
The Pounding Prologue
"Fey…hang…on!!" The blond haired teenage boy cried through gritted teeth. He was holding desperately onto his friend's hand, trying to keep her from falling. She was crying, her legs dangling off the side of a building, her oversized black and white stripped sweater blowing viciously in the wind. Her short skirt flapped as the wind grew stronger, her flats now flying off and her long, waist length black hair blowing wildly in her face. The blond haired boy growled, attempting to pull her up, but failing.
"Hayato!! Please, don't let go!!" the girl, Fey, cried, tears escaping. The blond haired boy dubbed Hayato gave another pull, but failed once again as his single arm wasn't strong enough. He took his bloody, broken arm and attemted to latch onto her, but the pain was too much.
"I'm…not…letting you…go!!" He grumbled, and a large clang came with a scream.
"SAGE TO THE RESCU-!!"
"CUT!!!"
A girl wearing a silky, yellow tank top under a white half jacket stood up from the director's chair, her layered brown hair flowing in tow. She sighed, placing her hands in her pale, skinny jean pockets.
"What a mess…" she muttered, "Fey, you were supposed to start crying frickin' ten minutes ago, and Hayato! Your mumbling and groans make you sound like you are taking a dump!!"
The girl turned her brown eyes to the new commer that had greasy, sandy blond hair in two braids and green eyes. Freckles covered her face, and she wore a tye-dye shirt labled "Save the Wailmers!" and bellbottoms. She pouted.
"Sage! You aren't even IN this scene!!" the girl face palmed herself, "And I can smell you from a mile away!! TAKE A FRICKIN' SHOWER!!"
"BUT-!"
"NOW!!"
"NO!! The Wailmers in the sea need water more that we do!! And I'm not here for the scene!!" Sage held a large red botton in her hand, "I'm here to get rid of all this electricity you are using!!"
She pressed it, and in a flash the room turned black and things crashed. The girl stood up, growling madly, and about to scream, when a small boy come jogging to her.
"You're late for-"
"OH SHIT!!" the girl knew exactly what he was talking about. She reached for the emergency switch that turned the lights on, and realized she walked to work.
"I need a ride!!" she looked around, and saw a skateboard, a leash, and Sage. Something came to mind. She took the leash, made Sage hold it, and jumped onto the skateboard.
"Ok Sage!! There's an evil water fountain at where Silver works!!" she muttered, hanging onto her end of the leash tightly, "Giddy up!!"
"EVIL WATER FOUNTAINS!!!" Sage screamed, dashing forward at a hundred miles per hour, dragging the girl with her, "KILL WATER FOUNTAIN OF DOOOOOOOM!!"
Upon arriving, the girl bashed through the crowd of people, heading for a room. On her way in, she heard wailing, and raised an eyebrow.
"Sorry I'm late, Silver!" She panted, running up to the girl dubbed Silver, who stood with a mask of a familiar girl on. Silver wore a simple black t-shirt, distressed jeans, and dark converse, with a short brown ponytail lashing around her as she turned her head. The girl contined examining the mask her friend wore, "Then again, maybe not. What in the name of Buddha are you wearing?"
"It's a Sophie-mask, Whit, they're all the rage," Silver whipped of the mask and turned to the girl, supposedly named Whit, "Damn. They keep pulling out my hair," Silver grimaced, and went on, "Gimme a sec and then tell me what we're gonna do today."
She turned to a middle aged man that trembled in fear, and commanded, "Out."
"Yes, yes! Okay!" the middled aged man scurried off, and Whit raised an eyebrow at the fact he was wearing swim trunks, the back labled "Pinkie Pie". Feeling pleased with herself, Silver turned her attention back over to Whit, who cleared her throat.
"Arhem. Well, Silver, it looks like you got us-" She lowered her voice. "-or rather stole us- a set." Silver coughed.
"Yes, well, I had to take VALUABLE time --very valuable, you know-- away from assassinations to do it. So be happy!" Silver smiled.
"So... You still... doing assassinations?" Whit faked a smiled and asked. Silver nodded.
"Yeah, in between takes and ogling Gary's purple pants." Blinking, her eyes wide, Whit gulped.
"Okay then..." She glanced up at the camera mounted in a corner. "So this was all taped? That means..." Whit took a deep breath. "... We didn't get to do the dramatic opening with you and me rising from the smoke!" Silver groaned and rubbed her forehead with her palm.
"Damn that Oak... Anyway, I'm sure we can still manage a dra- Oh. My. Fucking. Arceus! Is that... GARY?" Silver's scream made Whit wheel around, muttering,
"Huh? Gravy?" Silver shook her head, and pointed to a spot of in the distance.
"NO! How could you NOT see the purple pants?" The other squinted her eyes, and slowly sighed.
"Damn, girl, he's a mile away."
"It must be my purple-radar!" Silver said happily, then in a more serious tone, "Anyway, what do we have to do today?"
"Um... Well... How about the introduction to the specials?" Whit murmured, and Silver smiled.
"Of course! Well, dear readers, what we are presenting is a series of holiday specials! Tell us who were are featuring, Whit."
"Only the best of da best! Cast from all our great fics, other great authors, and many more! Who knows, maybe even some Harvest Moon to go along!" Whit cheered.
"We will bring you insanity, weirdness, awkwardness-"
"And love!"
"With a few special characters!" Silver gave a fake cough, "Yoshi and Whit," She muttered in between coughs. Whit glared but didn't say anything.
"There will be guest stars like the incredible-" Whit paused, brow furrowing. "Uh... Who was it that was so incredible?" Silver's brow wrinkled.
"Uh... was it Candi? Or maybe Devo?"
"Oh! It was! As well as the awesome-" Whit cut herself off once again. "-Never mind. He's not so awesome..."
"You mean Wolf?" Silver asked, and growled under her breath, "Sexist."
"Very sexist." Whit agreed, but said, "Or was it... yomoma? yo... mogli? What was his name that got blown up in WW2?" Silver jumped up.
"Oh! I know! YOMAMA!" Whit jumped up as well.
"YES! Thank you, Silver!"
"Anytime, girl, anytime," She answered, "Oh, and to top it off, there will be background information on your favorite authors!"
"That's right! Anything you want to know about our past, hobbies, interests, will be revealed!"
"Though how much of it is true will be up to you to decide," Silver finished, "We will update on every holiday that most people know about, Christmas, New Years, Chinese New Years, and all that fun stuff."
There was a long moment of silence.
"I guess that's it then…" Whit finished. There was a knocking at the door.
"What now?" Silver groaned, and made her way over to the door.
"Who is it?" Whit asked, keeping stride with her. Opening it, song filled the mansion.
"Deck the halls with boughs of-"
"AUGH! You aren't supposed to be here yet!" Silver bellowed, checking her pockets for something.
"-holly, fa la la la la, la la lala." Whit was starting to sing as well.
"GO AWAY!" Silver yelled again, and chucked what was in her pockets at them before slamming the door.
"What did you throw at them?" Whit asked, curious.
"A bomb," She replied simply, and braced herself against the heavy door. There was a loud bang,"I got it from Yoshi. I owe him one."
"YOSHI?! WHERE?!!" Whit started to freak out, shouting at the top of her lungs, "Is his shirt on or not? Please tell me it isn't!" Silver raised her eyebrows.
"He's not here."
"AW..." Whit pouted, "Hey, what's that rumbling I hear?"
They both listened hard for the sound.
"It sounds like it's coming from the pipes..." Silver breathed, "Pipes are plumbing... And plumbing is..." The two suddenly looked hard at each other.
"Connected to the toilets," Whit concluded shakily, then realizing who the culprit was, yelled, "SAGE! I'm gonna KILL YOU!"
"What do you- Why is SHE here?"
"I... rode her to your house?"
"EXCUSE ME? You RODE one of-" But whatever she was about to say was unheard as the pipes exploded, "SHIT!"
"You got it," Whit muttered, looking at the brown goop that had covered everything in seconds.
"QUIT WITH THE PUNS!" Silver yelled. "Urgh... Someone's gonna pay..."
As though in a last stand of defiance, the pipe let out another burp, releasing the rest of its contents onto the duo. They looked at each other once again.
"Shit."
