"Boy, I sure am hungry. Guess I'll have to ... eat this baby! Om nom nom nom nom!"
"Oh good, pretend cannibalism. That's appropriate for a three-month-old."
"And that, Matthew, is how you met your Aunt Buzzkill."
"Can't I have one nephew who doesn't call me that?"
"Not without a personality transplant."
"Funny."
"He would've picked it up from the twins anyway. You know, like Abed's kids did."
"Thank you for acknowledging my point."
"If it makes you feel any better, Jehan yelled at me for like a half hour when she found out about it."
"I know, I was in the room with her when she called."
"Look, it's just a silly name to them, like 'Memaw' or 'Pierce.' When it was time for Annie to go to the hospital, Ben and Dave were way more excited about getting to spend the night at your house than they were about getting a new brother."
"Really? You're not just saying that?"
"Really. And they refuse to eat real hot dogs now. We have to get those damn veggie dogs you foisted on them."
"Jeff, don't swear in front of the baby!"
"Jeez, you're worse than my mom. I think after three kids I know what is and isn't appropriate for them."
"Whatever, Mr. Spock."
"It's Doctor Spock, dumbass."
"Jeffrey Alan Winger! Don't you dare use that kind of language in front of our baby!"
"I— yes dear."
"You were saying?"
"Shut up."
Author's note: Inspired by a photo posted as a prompt by krilymcc in the Milady/Milord community on LiveJournal. (See my profile for a link to the photo.) I stole Jeff's middle name from shan21's wonderful fic Sink or Swim, a link to which can be found in my favorites.
