"I love him in ways that I can't explain to other people. They don't understand… it's not their fault."―Jennifer Elisabeth
Pain.
That's what Levy felt that day.
No matter how deep or how big the scars that she got from that battle, it was no match for the emotional pain she felt that day.
The day she lost Gajeel – she lost everything. Her future with him that was planned by the two of them, the names of their supposed to be children in the future that she made up in her mind, her will to live – everything.
He was willing to throw his life away for her – she was the same – but he doesn't want her to; so all she did was to cry his name out as she struggled from Lily's grasp that was keeping her from saving him.
If only she was strong enough.
"Stupid Gajeel." Thatwas the last thing she shouted before she broke down in tears with Lily hugging her from behind.
Two weeks had passed since then, the war had ended with them winning against the opponents, but not a single time did Levy showed up in the guild. She locked herself up in her room and cried. Everyone understood her circumstances and left her by herself, thinking that she'd rather be alone for now.
Lucy, being her best friend, was getting worried. Sure she wants to be by herself, but two weeks are too much – and with what Erza and Wendy stated, she hasn't been eating properly either.
For some reason, this scared Lucy so she decided to visit her in Fairy Hills, hoping she didn't do the thing that she fears she would do in this situation…she was so wrong.
"Levy?" Lucy knocked on her best friend's room but as expected no one answered back. "Levy! Open the door…please."
This left the blonde with no choice. She asked Natsu, who was right beside her all this time, to destroy the door and promised Erza that she'll pay for it later. The thought of Levy killing herself scared her even though she's not that kind of person.
On the other side of the door was a shaking Levy, sitting on the floor – her head hung low as she gripped a knife on her right hand, threatening to slice her other hand, in hope of cutting her pulse.
Never in her life had she thought of ending her life – until now. What's the purpose of living, anyway? Gajeel is dead, so was her future. How did he expect her to live life after all that she witnessed? She watched the love of her life being sucked into the underworld and she did nothing but cry while screaming his name. It's like the world crumbled right before her eyes.
He saved her.
She's alive.
She's alive…but she's not living.
Levy was about to slice her left hand off when the knife was sent flying towards the left side of her room and out of her grasp. She did not dare to look up – even when she felt a hand slapped her right in the face, making it sting.
"Stop it!" Lucy's voice echoed throughout the room. Levy didn't look up but she knew…she knew she was fuming.
"What the hell are you doing?!" Lucy's voice cracked and Levy knew she's preventing herself to cry.
Levy did not answer; she just sobbed and started to cry again. She's so sick of crying but that's all she can do to answer her best friend. She wanted her to slap her again, hoping this is all a nightmare and that will wake her up…but it's not.
"…Lucy" She choked between her sobs. A pair of arms enveloped her and pulled her into a tight hug – making her cry even more.
"I'm not going to apologize for slapping you." Lucy said. "Gajeel didn't sacrifice himself for you to just commit suicide. You think he'll be happy if you'll kill yourself even though he saved you? Everyone is worried about you too, don't do this Levy."
"I'm sorry." Levy sobbed. "I won't do that again, I promise."
A/N: I'm sorry, I have to write this one. I never even shipped Gajeel x Levy that much but the latest chapter made me cry.
