Summary: It's Sasuke's senior year, and with Itachi graduated and out of his way, he was hell-bent on first chair bass one.

Hey guys,

So this story is not really a romance kinda thing, if anything like that it's fluffy implied stuff. None of the fluff happened, but this story applies to me in every other aspect.

I was so mixed up and this is the only way I could vent without getting emotional.

Disclaimer- Don't own Naruto, or the TMEA(Texas Music Educator's Association) thing, but that would be cool.

Oh, How The Mighty Have Fallen

TMEAtmeaTMEAtmeaTMEAtmeaTMEA tmeaTMEAtmeaTMEAtmeaTMEAtmea TMEAtmeaTMEA

This was it.

My sixth year in choir under the direction of the state renowned teacher, Uchiha Madara.

My senior year.

Nothing would stand between me and that first chair this time, not even Itachi. No, this year the title of 'First Chair Bass One of the Texas All-state Choir' would belong to a different Uchiha.

I smirked in the warm up room, going through scales and range exercises. All-state was mine.

When Itachi and the rest of his friends competed, there was no chance. It was as if all of the top chairs had their names embedded into them. Not literally of course, as there were no real, physical 'chairs', but you get my point. Madara-sensei called them his shiners, his favorites, his Red Moons.

Honestly, it ticked me off.

Sure, I suppose it's natural for a teacher to like some more than others, but to favor a certain graduating class? It seemed a bit too partial to me.

Perhaps I was jealous, but openly calling a certain group of students the dawn of your career

Itachi and I are only a year apart, so we shared a middle-school my seventh (his eighth) grade year. Naturally, we were both in choir, where, at the time, Madara had been teaching. Itachi sang because our parents pushed him to explore his vocal talents, I sang because I wanted to be like Nii-san.

When Itachi moved on to high school, he unfortunately took Uchiha-sensei with him.

The man had already been partial to his Red Moons, but he absolutely adored Itachi. When he heard the high school's choral director was a flake, he promptly quit his middle-school job to become the vocal coach of the school.

And I was stuck with some fresh-out-of-college Music Major as my eighth grade director for half the year.

So technically it's only my fifth-and-a-half year under the direction of Uchiha-sensei.

Luckily by the time I reached high-school, they gave him the teaching position.

"G11 -9, Sasuke Uchiha?" My smirk widened as I heard the intrigued whispers of the other bass' in the warm-up room.

"That's Itachi's little brother, right?"

"I heard them sing together once at the All-state convention. I cried."

"John stood next to Sasuke at the Region clinic. He said...-"

I didn't bother listening to the rest as I gathered my things to go sing.

I walked behind the guide and waited impatiently in front of the audition room designated for bass ones.

Every year...

I couldn't wait until the last round, that's when it was interesting.

All-state choir auditions worked like this:

Mid-summer, the dedicated students went to camps and clinics to learn all twelve pieces, then throughout part of the school year, they would go to four different auditions and sing certain parts, or cuts, from three of the eight to twelve songs each round.

First round was simple- weed out the ones that suck. They gave the cuts two days in advance, and this round didn't even have sight-singing, which was usually the downfall of most singers. Not every one could claim that they were capable of reading and singing a portion of music with only thirty seconds of practice.

So really, first round took out the tone-deaf losers and the lazy bums who didn't know their music.

Only forty from each voice part advanced.

Forty first sopranos, forty second sopranos, forty first Altos, forty second Altos, forty first Tenors...

You get the point.

Second round had cuts from three different, usually more difficult, songs, as well as sight singing. This round divided the good, the bad, and the exceptional. The good auditions were put into the 'District' choir, where they did not advance to the third round, but they didn't completely bomb their audition.

The bad, well, they didn't make anything.

The exceptional auditions were the top twelve- The region choir. These singers would advance and audition two or three new cuts for the third round the day before the District-Region concert. The sight reading, the songs, and the cuts were harder, and, here's the catch, you got the cuts the day of your audition.

At the concert, while the District choir performed lame songs, the Region choir perform the big piece, usually a mass of Mozart or something of that nature. After the concert, the third round results would be anounced.

Only the top five would move on to the final round.

Same songs from third round, harder cuts, harder sight-singing, more competitors(this time from all over your part of the state) and the Mixed Choir only included the top four.

The top four of that voice part out of an entire portion of a state.

There was always spots five through ten, the men's or women's choir, but everyone shot for the top.

There were no more bad sight-singers, everyone knew the music by heart, and no one settled for second best.

That was the round I loved.

I wouldn't settle for second best. Even Madara said first chair was mine, with his beloved Itachi graduated of course.

First, though, I had to get through the baby-rounds, like this one. Round two.

"Sasuke, the judges are ready for you." I give a curt nod and put on my game-face.

My voice yesterday had been a bit faulty, but when I sang this morning it had been spot-on.

I walked in and set my music binder on top of the folder that held the sight-reading sheet. It was always a giddy temptation to pick up the folder and open it before the designated time, but I squashed the feeling.

Opening my music, I faced the large black tarp that concealed the identities of the judges behind it. I could only pray that Madara-Sensei wasn't judging my voice-part. Contrary to popular belief, having your teacher as your judge was not a good thing, especially if you had a good teacher.

They know your voice, your strong points, your flaws. They've heard your best, your worst and know exactly what to look for in your audition.

I let go of the thought and let out a shaky sigh.

The attendant responsible for pressing play on the cut CD mouthed 'Are you ready?' to me, to which I gave a confident nod and looked to my music.

The first cut was from a twentieth century piece, a beautiful song, really, but completely English. The notes were tasking, as well as the demand for musicality and dynamics, but it wasn't a cut I was worried about.

The second cut was much more aged. It was a piece by Brahms and Bass-ones came in on an exceptionally high note, for men at least. And it was in German.

I hate German.

And since it was Brahms, it required a full sound, almost demanding vibrato and very slight melisma, and let's not get started on the crescendos and growth.

I had a bit more trouble singing this piece, but it wasn't a bad audition of the cut. The only thing keeping me going was imagining Madara-sensei directing me, criticizing me. I also thought of the pointers Itachi gave me when he came home from his fancy music college to visit.

When the German song-cut finally ended, I couldn't even allow myself to breathe a sigh of relief.

The third cut...

This song tripped everyone up. It required diligent counting and accuracy. It was an awful piece, not even musical, really. At one point in the song, the first sopranos hold ludicrously high notes, and all the while, the rest of the choir was a droning dissonance, a giant cluster-fuck of clashing notes and rhythms, supposedly symbolizing imperfection.

I must say, mission accomplished, composer.

I pushed through it, psyched myself out a bit, but it wasn't anything big, most likely in my head.

Then I did it.

I fucked up the two triplets.

God Damn it! I worked so fucking hard on perfecting that! I had it! What the fuck happened!

Before I knew it, I heard the recording play 'You may now open the sight-reading folder'.

I forced myself to calm down, thinking of my best friend's stupid face. I imagined him singing scales and skips and signing chromatic scales in solfege.

I hear the tonic chord and begin to practice sight reading. My mind is swept clean of any distractions and I'm in the zone.

...Or so I thought.

"Do, Sol, Fa-Re, Mi, La... Re? ...Do...Wha..?" I repeat the interval a few times, apparently costing me precious seconds, because right as I finish going through it my first time, I hear the recorder say "Stop." and I'm in shock.

I usually go through a line like that two or three times before thirty seconds is up...

The tonic plays once more.

I don't even hear the words that play from the recording to know I've been instructed to start. The dull hum of the recorded man's voice is just that- a dull hum in the back of my head.

I scramble to pick up the pieces of my scattered mind and begin to silently set a slow paced rhythm with my hand.

The actual judged sight-singing was worse than the practice.

It was like a nightmare, struggling to find 'Do', trying to keep rhythm when I've skipped a dotted quarter note, all the while freaking out.

I was a phenomenal sight-reader.

Hell, I sight-read from a book the entire waiting period, what's wrong with me?

After I salvage the whats left of my audition, I shakily shut the sight-reading binder and walk out of the room, numb all over.

The guide led me to a separate holding area for the students who have already sang and sightread. I walked behind her with tense steps, my eyes wide and disoriented.

Did I really just fuck up sight-reading? And what about those triplets? Was I flat on those higher notes?

I got to the gym and sat my bag down in no place in particular. I didn't see anyone from my school that had already gone anyway.

I kind of wish Naruto had gone before me, though. Then he'd be here to meet me and grin and say 'So, was getting first chair in the second round as easy as the first, future All-stater?'.

But then I'd have to answer 'no'. With a performance like that, first chair was out of the question.

I told myself to calm down, that if I messed up, then everyone probably did.

Besides, it's probably just my nerves getting to me. I was always confident before an audition, at most a bit queasy, but after was a different story.

So it had to be nerves.

I wish they allowed electronics during the competition.

I wish they allowed singing(outside of the audition) during the competition.

Fortunately, though, they do allow sleep.

I pulled my ridiculously large throw-blanket out of my bag and tucked my pillow between my head and the bleacher seat, lulling myself into a restless sleep by thinking of all of the possible ways I could have fixed my audition and singing solfege in my head.

"Hey."

Huh?

"Hey, wake up, Teme."

I blink my eyes open and the first thing I see is blue. Naruto backs away and grins as I flinch at the sudden increase of light.

I rub my face and look around at the now half-full gymnasium.

"How long did I sleep?"

Naruto put his hand behind his head and looked to the ceiling for answers, his lip jutting out in thought.

"Hmm, well I don't have my phone, of course, but our bus arrived at around eight-fifteen, and you were number nine, and then however long you had to wait..." His other hand reached up and poked at the air like he was rearranging an invisible abacus.

I roll my eyes at his handicap with first grade math. "I got into the gym at about nine-ten and went straight to sleep."

"Oh! Well then you've been napping for about two hours. I knew something was missing from my equation..."

Only two hours?

The dream I had made it feel like years...

"What did you dream about?"

I frown and give Naruto a look and he grinned once more. "Yes, you said that out loud."

A sigh escapes my throat and I have to stop myself from brooding more than I already am as I explain the dream.

I dreamed that I only made fourth chair, like last year, and went on to the third and fourth rounds in the same chair. It was still something to boast, but not much in my opinion.

I went to tour music schools and colleges and they immediately turned me away due to my chair, claiming that I'd never be first like Itachi.

Then I went to see Itachi and he shunned me and even made Madara-sensei shun me, so it was like I got kicked out of choir and all of the other competitions.

It wouldn't seem like a big deal, but choir and music are things that have been constants in my life.

"Man, that's rough..." And the volume of his voice is not the usual forte but more of a sympathetic pianissimo. I feel an arm throw itself over my shoulder and I turn my head.

Naruto's grin is softer and he pats my shoulder affectionately. "To me, you'll always be the best, no matter what your chair is. Itachi be damned." I roll my eyes and look down to hide my half-smile. I knew Naruto would understand.

Instead of a 'thank you', though, I respond with, "An answer like that is only expected from a District-loser like you."

I feel his grip on my shoulder tighten, then release as a smooth smile spreads on that mischievous face.

"Ah-ah, you didn't let me finish," I raise a brow. " -Itachi be damned... Since you could only ever lose to me~! AHAHAHA!"

I can't help but chuckle, "Whatever, Dobe, we're not even against each other."

He suddenly stands, "C'mon, you emo, let's socialize with strangers."

By this he means 'Follow me while I socialize with strangers.' so I get up.

For awhile I don't even think about the contest, just hanging out with Naruto, actually enjoying myself when we played stupid games with people to pass the time. Every time someone asked the dreaded question 'How'd you do?', I mirrored Naruto. I shrugged.

I honestly didn't know. I'd never heard my competition, really, having always been focused on Itachi.

And to my surprise, instead of badgering me for details, the walked away with a reciprocated shrug and maybe a confused look. And so, like them, when Naruto gave me that care-free grin, I reciprocated.

This whole 'who-cares-just-forget-it' thing was awesome, and I eventually forgot all about the sight-reading or that fucking high note.

...Until they posted scores.

Part of me knew from the beginning that I'd succeed and advance to the next round, and even if I did make fourth chair, luck was on my side. Instead of posting the scores on the wall like they did every other year, they had the directors tell student scores.

I waited patiently in line, holding Naruto's hand like I did every round. He always wondered if he'd even make district this year, so I took it upon myself to be the shoulder he cried on just in case.

Madara-sensei walked in and pulled the fated sheet of paper from the envelope. He began reading off names in alphabetical order. Name, voice-part, chair.

Name, voice-part, chair.

Name, voice-part, cha-

"Uzumaki, Tenor two, chair fourteen. Congrats 'Dead-last', you got second alternate. Now all we have to do is poison two Region second tenors and you'll be going to third round." Everyone laughed, and even I chuckled when Madara-sensei used my nick name for Naruto.

I looked over to him, proud and admiring his cheesy grin. Naruto had a lovely voice and capability, but he had terrible nerves, so this was quite the accomplishment.

I was so caught up in it that I almost missed the nauseating silence.

Almost.

I looked up to see everyone watching Madara-sensei as he shook in what looked to be disbelieving rage.

"Uchiha Sasuke, Bass one... Twentieth chair." I didn't hear it at first, as a strange tickling sensation vibrated through my ears and behind my eyes.

"What the F-" I heard Naruto stop himself from stealing the words right out of my mouth.

As soon as the tickling sensation faded, a hot, prickly one took over. It was hot like a spice, and I could only imagine that this was what Madara's rage, my rage, must've tasted like.

It was like I had the hormones of a pregnant lady, because two seconds after the hot fury came the crippling sadness, the utter disappointment, the lost feeling, the failure.

A million thoughts invaded, not even about All-state alone.

I can't get a scholarship like this.

I won't get the All-state Honor Society award this year.

My name won't be announced.

Does this mean I have to give up on a music school?

What else could I major in?

I've been so focused on All-state that I haven't even taken my SAT or ACT. It's October and I'm a senior.

I skipped those test-taking classes to go to rehearsals so I could get scholarships based on that.

I practiced instead of studied, because only Itachi could do neither and be perfect. Now I had no chance at All-state and B's.

I swallowed the tears and shut off, still gripping Naruto's hand for dear life. I didn't even feel us walking to the bus to leave. How long had I spaced?

"It's okay, Sasuke. I know you don't think so, but it's okay." Part of me was mad he said that, but another part agreed.

I nodded and he continued, "You don't have to be Itachi. In my opinion, you're happier than him anyways. And, as a bonus, we'll be rehearsing the entire day in the same choir, so you get to hang out with this handsome devil and see me in action!"

I stayed silent for a good while, just listening to him talk before I finally broke from my shock and began talking back. We laughed bitterly, jokingly and talked about blowing off the District concert to go to the arcade or watch a movie. I would never do that, since District always sings the twentieth century songs, and skipping would make me a sore loser, but it was fun to joke.

We talked about Madara's reaction, the shitty judges, what my family's, mostly Itachi's, reaction will be. We talked about all the fun we had today, all the fun we'll have on the concert day, the embarrassment of facing the accomplished Region choir and their high-and-mighty pity. It was a terrible thing to admit, but it was fun being bitter.

It made me wonder if Itachi ever felt bitterness like this.

It honestly wasn't so bad when you had someone to make it sweet, but I know Itachi's never had that.

He was too pushed by our parents, too driven to make time for friends and companions.

Hell, the only decent bond he had was with Madara-sensei.

...Weird...

Eventually the bus pulled up to the school and I climbed into Naruto's truck so he could drive me home. It was dark by the time we got onto my street and we just ended a conversation about how funny the Region director's face is gonna be when he notices my absence.

Naruto sighed as he finished laughing, then grabbed my hand once more, looking at me.

"Y'know, every year you held my hand made it easier and easier not to care where I ended up. It was because I knew someone was proud of me, would be there for me no matter what, and would love me no matter how much of a loser people made me feel like."

I looked up and tried to meet his eyes, but they were staring past me into the distance, reflecting the soft smile on Naruto's face.

He continued, "I know it's a shitty thing to say, but part of me is glad that you didn't do as well as you would have liked." I raise a brow, almost displeased, but I let him continue.

"I'm glad because I've always wanted to be someone my most important person could lean on. I wanted to know what it felt like to be proud of someone for being content with themselves no matter what, even if it was because of me."

I smirk, "So you want someone to depend on you?"

I expect a laugh, but I don't receive one. "I want someone to know I love them no matter what. That they can depend on me, talk to me, cry to me, and I'll always be there to hold their hand."

As if to emphasize, he squeezed my hand and looked at me.

Naruto let me know that it was okay to let go every now and then, that you didn't have to come out on top and life wasn't a competition.

Even so, in the end I still felt like I one-upped Itachi. Now I knew things that he probably didn't. I had a friend that he'd never have. I knew when to let go.

I looked forward to my last year with the Texas Music Educator's Association. Randall Z. Stroope be damned. Itachi be damned. Juliard be damned.

On that night, I may have given away my first kiss to my best friend, but I'll tell you what I didn't give.

That night, I didn't give a damn.

TMEAtmeaTMEAtmeaTMEAtmeaTMEA tmeaTMEAtmeaTMEAtmeaTMEAtmea TMEAtmeaTMEA

Thanks for reading!

How this actually happened and applies to me:

Some of you know that I am extremely involved in choir and choral competitions. Today, I went to the second round of the Texas All-state Choir Auditions. There are four rounds, and last year, I made it to the last one[The LAST FUCKING ROUND] and got a sinus infection, and ended up like four chairs away from Texas choir, so my senior year I promised myself that I would make it.

I was A11-9, First Soprano. The 20th Cent. Song was 'The new moon' by David Childs.

I did well on this one, even the high notes, but I under-sang a note in the end.

The German was 'Ich Aber Bin Elend' by Brahms.

We started on the highest notes. Forte. Needless to say it was a battle and not my best.

The cluster-fuck song was the women's piece, 'You are the Music' by Joan Szymko.

I was a 16th note behind on an entrance and completely fucked up my triplets. "Waves within a tide" has never sounded less like waves.

Sight-reading

Fuck.

Jk, my lowest was 45/60. But that's not that great considering the fact that I could get 55/60 on a cold read.

Needless to say, my day sucked. How do I go from almost All-stater to District-Deadlast? Well, I wasn't deadlast by any means, but it still feels the same... Twentieth chair! And ~

my choir teacher actually reacted that way.

No, I have no older siblings, but I did have a veteren all-stater in my grade that I look up to, and I have a rival as well.

I had no comforting friend, but still, I have you guys to vent on.

Threes all around.

Thanks for reading.

~SaLEm