Almost a female lifestyle

Me: Well my first fan fiction ever… Naruto is female so this should be fun. *Add – Evil laughter, lol -.-'?*

Naruto: WTF! I'm female what about my brilliant pranks?

Me: Will still be there… Your name will still be Naruto, Sasuke is still a teme – you just call him ero-genin and for a reason to – lol o_o' *Add – Blankness ^^,?*

Naruto: HOLY CRAP! I'm strong right? – Omg, I'm a lesbian right? – Oh no… x.x'! *Add – thump sound of Naruto fainting.*

Me: I was going to say that Sakura hates you and you hate her… but ehm… You'll find out.

Sasuke: I'm gay?

Me: Glad you admit it. *Add – Evil laughter! 8D!*

Sasuke: NO! Just disclaim please…

Me: Fine… Do I have to? *Add - Kishi-sama sewing me x_x'!* Fine… I do not own Naruto or any of its character only Sasukes OOC'ness *Add – Evil laughter 8D!*

Sasuke: I'm a pervert?

Me: Glad you admit it… Anyways, sorry for my bad English… I'm what they'll call a 'Dead-Last' in my class – btw. I'm bad for a reason I'm from Denmark and learned English in school -.-'!...

Sasuke I didn't admit anything… o_o'

Naruto: My awesome jumpsuit, hello?

Me: THAT'S GOING TO BE OVER MY DEAD BODY!

Sasuke: Mine too; please Kami-sama let her be hot!

Naruto: GET TO THE FRIGGIN' STORY ALREADY! *Add – Cute pout :3!*

Me: Sorry, sorry… HERE IS CHAPTER ONE OF 'ALMOST A FEMALE LIFESTYLE!' it's actually prologue but whatever…


Summary: Naruto is dead-last… But is she really now? Read as she makes her way into the shinobi world with a stupid pink-haired banshee, a brooding emo like closet pervert, an open perverted sensei AND a stupid thinking idiotic fox.- FEMNARU- -Pairings not decided. –Don't have an inner pervert. –Rated for language.

''Yo'' – Talking

'Ero-Genin' – Thinking

''Kit'' – Demon/Summoning/Inner Sakura/Inner Demon/Jutsu.

'Bitch' – Thinking for Demon/Summoning/Inner Sakura/Inner Demon.

Warning: May or may not contain spoilers… o_o'! And bad language, sorry still don't have an inner pervert… o_o'!


Prologue – Kyuubi no Kitsune

Hiruzens P.O.V

It was the 10th October. It was the birth of one of the greatest heroes of all time. The birth of Namikaze-Uzumaki Naruto.

Minatos P.O.V

Earlier – Same day.

I was sitting at the table with two of the Hiruzen the third Hokage and Biwako his wife and of course my own wife Kushina. I knew this day was going to change our lives. 'Cause today we were having our first baby.

''This is what we did for your predecessor, Mito-sama, as well.'' Hiruzen started, ''the seal nearly failed when she gave birth.'' He continued.

He started to tell us about the place they have been setting up and the preparation.

Later – Same day.

''OH GOD IT HURRRRRRRTS!'' Was the sound of my lovely wife Kushina giving birth… ''KRAAAAAA!'' Another sound…

''Uh… I … Uh… I've never heard Kushina in so much pain,'' I panicked. ''are… are you sure she's okay?''

''SHE'S FINE JUST KEEP YOUR EYES ONE THE SEAL!'' Biwako yelled. ''But… She's-'' I stated before being interrupted. ''GOOD LORD YOU'RE THE FOURTH HOKAGE DON'T PANIC, THIS IS WHY WOMEN HAVE BABIES YOU MEN CAN'T HANDLE PAIN!'' She snapped at me.

While hearing Kushina struggling with giving birth and trying to hold the nine-tails I could feel Kyuubi struggling as well.

'It's so strong; I can feel the fox struggling to get out.' I panicked in my own head. ''HANG IN THERE KUSHINA, YOU TOO NARUTO!'' I yelled trying to support them both.

''THE HEADS OUT! ALMOST THERE, KUSHINA!'' Biwako yelled. I could still hear her pain. ''KEEP GOING KUSHINA-SAN!'' A nurse yelled as well.

''NARUTOOO! GET OUT HERE! AND NINE-TAILS STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE!'' And with that line coming from me Kushina made her last push. ''It's okay…''

Kushina was panting hard at the moment. ''Congratulations, it's a beautiful, healthy baby girl.'' Biwako said.

I then heard two loud thuds and turned my head only to be met by Biwako and the nurse unconscious, and a man wearing a black coat and mask.

''Fourth Hokage – Minato… Step away from the jinchuuriki.'' The man said. ''Or your daughter dies at an age of one minute.''

My eyes widened, and then narrowed. 'That guy, how did he get through the barrier?' I thought as I heard Kushina in pain. 'Kushina, the seal is not done yet.'

''Back away from the jinchuuriki, or don't you care if your daughter dies?'' He snapped holding a kunai above Narutos face.

''HOLD IT! J-just calm down.'' I said panicking… ''NGH-GHHH!'' Kushina still fought against the fox.

''You should take your own advice Minato, I'm perfectly calm.'' He said tossing Naruto in the air.

''NARUTOOO!'' Kushina yelled. My eyes narrowed and with a yellow flash I caught Naruto, but quickly hearing a few 'KSHHH'. I looked at it only to see paper bombs attached to Narutos blanket. (A/N: Is it a blanket? O_o'?) I pulled Naruto out of it and in a second I was out of the place. I then transported home and put Naruto in a crib. ''You'll be safe here.'' Minato whispered to his daughter. ''You'll wait for on your own for a little bit Naruto… I'll have to go and save you mom before it's too late.''

When I came back after Kushina I noticed something really hard to notice… the nine-tailed fox had broken out. Kyuubi was aiming for Kushina but with a flash I saved her landing on a tree. ''Minato… Is Naruto…? Is Naruto okay?'' She managed to pant out; she looked to be in a lot of pain.

''Yes… she's fine I hid her somewhere safe.'' I reassured her. ''Thank god.'' She replied. ''Minato… Stop him, stop the nine-tailed… they're headed for the village.

I teleported home again, shocking Kushina. ''Why…?'' She asked. ''Never mind why… stay here with Naruto.'' I replied putting her next to Naruto.

Kushina panted heavy and wrapped an arm around Naruto. ''…Naruto…'' She said with a small voice. I clinched my hand into a fist looking down at my family sad. Putting on my cloak I said; ''I'll be back before you know it.

Hiruzens P.O.V

On to my version of the story… Damn you Minato for breaking in.

Uzumaki Kushina who happens to be the mother of Naruto was in labor and was at the time far, far away from the village. You see Kushina had a secret from the village. She was the jinchuuriki, the host of Kyuubi no Kitsune.

Kushina and her husband Namikaze Minato - who also happens to be the fourth Hokage and Konohas yellow flash – both knew that this was going to be a problem. The seal was weak at childbirth and therefore could we only fear that Kyuubi was going to fight the seal.

Kushina and Minato were sent far away with a couple of ANBU guards and medics. Those way things couldn't go wrong. Well… That's what we thought.

The same day Kyuubi broke free, and suddenly to my chock it was summoned to the village by who knows how. Every ninja was sent in action and could only hope to be alive after that. I was about to go myself when Minato came.

Everyone was relieved to see him on his face. (A/N: Didn't come out right… But you know what I mean… right? xD.) that was when Kyuubi formed a Bijuu beast bomb, and again everyone was scared. But luckily for the village Minato used a Hiraishin kunai and there created the 'space-time barrier'.

Other than the huge explosion that were miles away from the village and Kyuubi and Minato disappearing out of the blue.

Later that same day a few ANBUs and I were on our way to the place where Minato was. We weren't met by him although. No, we were met by the sight of the shinigami. That was where I knew he was going to kill himself.

Later that same day, that very spot, I saw Minato and Kushina die in front of their baby girl. I knew they were having a little girl but, I didn't know that she would be so beautiful. On her stomach were a seal, and a three bladed kunai.

And that was when Minato and Kushina died, and left behind their legacy, Uzumaki Naruto – Jinchuuriki of the leaf. Their newborn baby girl who they hoped would grow up as a hero.


Me: AND END OF PROLOUGE! - Sorry if it was short, I'll do a longer one if I can, but get off my back seriously… Sorry!

Naruto: Nobody's on your back…

Sasuke: That's what they call a dumb blonde… *Add – Uchiha God Smirk… xD!*

Me: … SHUT UP WILL YA? Geez I know, I know…. Anyway… REVIEW FOR A CHAPTER 1 :3!

Naruto: Don't if you want to live…

Sasuke: Do it I want to see him as a girl.

Sakura: This should be fun.

Neji: (WTF!) It's our destiny to see what will happen. (xD!)

Naruto-Sage mode: I'm serious…

Me: OKAY! Let's get on with this… thank you Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura…. Neji. (Seriously how did he get in?)