Cursed ones

Chapter one: gift from the monster

It was a crisp beautiful morning in Nerima, an early morning fog was settling in which would seem unusual to the town's inhabitants. However, given the unusual happenings that graced the town, this was normal and quite welcome considering the disasters that had accompanied these happenings. Along the not-yet-busy sidewalk of the misty street, a small bike, accompanied by an attractive Chinese waitress who flawlessly balanced a box from her restaurant on her one free hand, rode placidly by. Usually the spices, herbs and other ingredients from the items normally contained within the box attracted much attention. Today though, what was contained within the box were several other boxes holding these spices, herbs and ingredients. On this morning the waitress was to deliver these to a fellow restaurant a fair distance from her own ramen restaurant, The Cat Café.

It seemed unusual that her café had anything to do with a sushi restaurant so far away. However, her great grandmother, Cologne, who owned her restaurant, was very wise. She also seemed, much to the waitress's amazement, somewhat afraid to refuse the owner of this restaurant. So an agreement was reached. Ingredients would be exchanged in return for certain boundaries of advertising for each restaurant. The waitress looked down to observe the movement beneath her mandarin neckline shirt; such was the force of her stomach rumblings. She did all this without once wavering from the straight-lined path her bike was taking. All this was due to her constant exercises with the moped, which involved building up enough velocity to become airborne and crash through any obstacle no matter how thick or living.

"I'm so hungry, why did Great Grandmother have me make a delivery so early?" She said to herself in her native mandarin. It was true that the day was just beginning and her grandmother had woken her with a sharp jab of her staff in order to rouse her sleeping great grand daughter. She then proceeded to rush her out the door while she rapidly dressed and combed her long lavender hair after all she must always look good for her husband. Well, in all honesty, he wasn't her husband just yet, but by rights he was; after all he had defeated her, which meant she was his forever by her Amazon law. She was so grateful that day after she had been horrified to realize she had been defeated the second time in her life by the same person. Fortunately, later on, she realized the person was a boy after all, only inflicted with a curse, which turned him to an attractive young red head with cold water. So after being tricked to believe that he was a girl, cursed with being turned into a boy, she consulted with her great grandmother, an Amazon matriarch. She was allowed to retrain at a certain training grounds called Jusenkyo and accidentally fell into one of the cursed springs littering the ground underneath the tall bamboo poles set down for balance. Unfortunately these springs caused whosoever was so unlucky to fall into one of these springs to take the form of whatever had drowned there. This in the waitress's case was a cat.

So she was given a choice; stay and keep training in order to defeat the girl who had twice defeated her or live her life as a cat and live with this same girl, in male form whom she belonged to. She made her choice and mailed herself, as a cat to her beloved, only to find she/he had ailurophobia (intense fear of cats) and once again would not allow her near him/her. That did not matter as it turned out; once she had spied the red head and found out the truth, she resumed the chase (in human form) of her beloved, along with her great grandmother at their newly opened ramen café. A café which she had calculated to be very secure in its finances, to not have to make dealings with a rival restaurant. However, the finances of the café were none of her business; her focus was to serve the customer and catch her husband and make him see that she was the right woman for him.

Once more her stomach protested to its emptiness only higher in range and caused her to double over. She was unsure whether or not she would be able to make it back to the café after this delivery without a full stomach and that was not acceptable what with all the work she had to do (and a lunch for her husband which had to be fixed). She heaved a great sigh, ooh how she wanted something to eat! It was then after forcing her body straight she noticed her destination was in sight and an impressive sight it was too! The building was large and flat and had many open decks and balconies, which the waitress guessed was for dining on during the warmer days. The building wasn't just what made up the restaurant several small patios were inlaid around the lush gardens and had fountains around the building itself. They looked very secluded nice and romantic for young couples maybe she could take her beloved here sometime, hey wait a minute! She couldn't take her love here she couldn't take anyone here, period! It looked like it was more than just a rival more like a monster ready to eat up any other food business within twenty miles.

At this thought the waitress paled and took her bike back several paces. She considered going back and facing her great grandmother's wraith over aiding with the downfall of her only means of living. But then again it did look like a very expensive restaurant and sushi wasn't for everyone perhaps her little café had nothing to worry about from this monster, and there was also Ukyo's okonami... Aaah yes the little restaurant with that horrible girl who owned it and was constantly getting in the way of her path to her beloved. Ukyo, that horrible cross dressing okonomiyaki chef who her beloved's father had agreed to take with him and his son in order to attain her dowry which was the okonomiyaki cart her family owned. Unfortunately, the horrible girl had failed to note that Ranma, her beloved had thought she was a boy at the time and did not mind it when his father left her behind and took the cart. The waitress would've thought this hilarious or may even had felt sorry for Ukyo had it not been for that stubborn girls vengeful return fifteen years later just after she and her beloved were engaged.

It had been a strange and hard battle the two had had, she was told, and after a slight slip up Ukyo's real gender was revealed and she once again fell for Ranma and had also pledged to become his wife. The waitress smirked at the thought of her little okonami being closed down. Then that stupid Ukyo would no longer be able to come barging in with healthy servings of okonomiyaki for Ranma whenever she appeared with steaming hot delicious ramen for his meals. Why did Ranma love that stuff so much anyway? Her cooking was far superior and far more diverse than anything that dumb Ukyo could come up with, and wasn't that what every man wanted in a wife?

She reasoned all of this within her mind while parking her bike and making her way up the stone step path to the front entrance and pushing her way through the double doors to the inside of the restaurant. Once inside the waitress's fears were born a new, the interior was consisted of low set Japanese style tables with soft comfortable cushions for sitting all positioned near the large windows allowing a view of the beautiful koi ponds fountains and gardens. At the far wall a large sushi and drink bar was lavishly decorated and at a few of the far corners she could see a few tea sets were obviously a few times a day tea drinking ceremonies were performed. She gulped nervously; the whole place had the look of a western coffee bar, comfortable and moderately priced. If this place was really that good she and her great grandmother would be serving here soon. Warily the waitress put the box on the bar and looked around for anyone.

"Nihao? Anyone here? Deliveries here from cat café as asked!" The waitress spoke in her broken Japanese. She had only recently arrived in Nerima about a year ago and was still very much in need of practice when it came to Japanese. She waited a moment, nothing "Nihao?" She looked around no costumers were in the gardens or at any of the tables this must be their downtime, you didn't need to know any kind of entrepreneurial skills to guess that. She leaned back against the bar supporting herself on her elbows and looked up at the ceiling, now what? She had gotten up this early delayed her work at her own café and her beloved's lunch and cycled all this way on a painfully empty stomach for what? Speaking of her hunger her stomach was rumbling in decibels far louder than was natural. She spied some raw salmon in the glass casings of the bar it wasn't very appetizing when it wasn't rolled up with rice and seaweed and sushi wasn't her most favorite of foods, anyway even if the chefs were around to cook anything she didn't have any money.

She spied a window on the wall separating the two rooms, which was covered up by flaps, which led into the other room. The other room, she guessed was an extra kitchen used to make food in advance for the dinner rush same as her restaurant. The waitress once again cringed if this restaurant was so popular it needed food prepared ahead of time than her café really was in trouble. She looked around the corner and saw a door with lettering on it, which said "storage room" in kanji symbols. She eyed the salmon once more she couldn't enjoy raw fish as a human but perhaps a cat would enjoy it quite happily. Spying around once more, she quickly grabbed up a water bottle from inside the bar and quickly poured it over her head activating the curse. Speedily she trotted out of her pile of clothes, on to the bar and through the window to the storage room. The storage room was well decorated as well, and well organized it too had low set tables for the staff. In the middle was a crate with a fishy smell radiating from it. The cat licked her whiskers as a human that smell would've been unbelievably unattractive but now it was incredible and her now cat-sized stomach rumbled in anticipation.

She quickly hopped on top of the crate and using her hunger-driven strength pushed open the unfastened crate top. She quickly sliced open a plastic sealed slab of salmon with her razor sharp claws and proceeded to chow down on its salty flesh. She had not been long filling herself with the underwater game when the fur on her back bristled and her ears twitched with the sound of something breathing heavily behind her. She gulped the one last bite of salmon nervously, knowing she might need to make a hard dash in a few moments and shakily turned her head to meet two large piercing orange eyes lead by a furry snarling white snout, lined with gleaming white knife like teeth. Rearing on her hind legs and hissing wildly the little cat tried desperately to scare away the large wolf. This she found was easier said than done the impressive beautiful white and large wolf seemed to be snarling in such a way it sounded like chortling.

Pushing her fear aside she quickly leapt on the wolf's back attempting to use it as leverage for a long leap to the window leading to the bar outside. The wolf's back twitched sideways instantaneously causing her to lose her balance and clumsily land on the floor. She regained her balance with a panicked "meowll!" and flung herself at the door instead, just barely missing the wolf's snapping jaws. Once again her constant mishaps with her bike came in handy as she built up velocity with her small kitty paws and flung herself bodily at the door smacking it open with pain radiating up and down her furry body. She took a half second to shake herself back to her senses and once again bolt from the snapping jaws of the white wolf. Her only hope was to jump on top of the bar and wait the canine out while she managed to find some hot water. This, however, was not to be as a swishing curtain of fabric came from behind the bar and blocked her path. Skidding on her fuzzy bottom the tiny cat yowled in fear and surprise and readied herself to scale this mountain of cloth, anything was better than becoming dog chow.

"Miso! You know better than that." A timid, soft voice said imploringly not scolding. The tiny cat looked up, the cloth, it turned out was a green restaurant kimono worn by a brunette woman whose black eyes looked as though she were walking through a room full of armed convicts. Her hair was done up at the top of her head in a bun with a braid hanging down from the ribbon fastening. The woman leaned down and scooped the perplexed feline into her arms and hugged her close to her chin as though she had just about to have been eaten, and for all the small would-be cat knew she might have been.

She looked down at the large ivory wolf that snorted indignantly and walked away while turning her snout up in the air. It was upon this closer and much more safer inspection the waitress/cat noticed that the bushy mane on the wolf's neck was gathered together at the sides and fastened with a set of magenta beads akin to her own little neck ruff which still miraculously kept the beads in her fur after her transformation. The brunette woman shook her head and sighed worriedly while clicking her tongue and she turned towards the bar.

She set the little cat on the cool surface and quickly pulled out a large thermos filled with clear soup and poured a little into a small saucer with a few tiny shrimp and tofu bits. Again the little cat/waitress felt a pang of anxiousness even during their down time these people had to have soup broth ready ahead of time her little café indeed was in trouble.

"If you wanted something to eat you needed only to ask." The small, timid voice of the brunette said kindly as the soup was pushed under her small kitty snout. The waitress was about to dig in to the soup when her head snapped up in realization. She watched the kimono clad brunette walk over to where her piles of clothes were and gather them up into a pile. Did this woman know she was human? Maybe in her desperate state of hunger she had failed to notice someone watching, maybe the woman deduced her real form from the pile of clothes. That still didn't explain why she would be so calm about it. She suddenly had the urge to speak out and opened her mouth to form words, "Mroowrr?" She bit her tongue she'd forgotten she was still a cat the woman covered her mouth and giggled shyly.

The brunette woman folded her clothes neatly beside the bowl of soup and looked at the soup and nodded while smiling unsurely. The waitress realized the woman wasn't going to give her any answers, at least not as a cat and bowed her head to start lapping at the hot broth. HOT BROTH! She'd forgotten completely! Instantly she felt her bare skin returning and her long lavender hair sprouting back and instantly returning dumplings on top of her head. How could she have allowed herself so many slip-ups in one day? Changing into a cat in broad view of everyone, stealing from a rival restaurant and now she'd forgotten that hot water deactivated her curse.

"Ebi! How dare you let some drunken naked schoolgirl in here! Don't you know how to work a front bar, or you that incompetent!" A shrill bossy voice shrieked causing the now stunned and very naked waitress to jump. The waitress turned and observed a woman in a stunning purple kimono with a glittering pochiri and green, yellow striped hair. Ebi shrunk back and held her fists up to her mouth and looked like she was about to cry. "B-But Maki, I only meant to feed her; she was so starved she wandered into the storage room and ate some raw salmon c-couldn't you just let her get her clothes?" Maki interrupted her, "I don't have room in my restaurant for lazy slackers and certainly not naked morons like this!" She screamed pointing red painted nails at the crouching waitress whom observed her eyes were the same colour as the nails.

The waitress who was highly insulted at this point made to speak up for Ebi but was interrupted when a blonde woman with blue serene eyes and a slightly longer than usual neck stepped in between the quarrelling pair." Maki, calm down, this is the waitress from the cat café she's brought us some of the exchange goods you ordered". She said picking up the pile of clothes and helped the waitress down. Her appearance was very casual save for her long golden blonde hair, which was held back by a big blue bow. It looked as though she was responsible for the nitty-gritty work around the restaurant as her knee length boots and brown pants were covered with dust and dirt.

Maki looked outraged "How dare you talk to me that way! I'm the owner of this restaurant and if you don't start acting like it you'll face the consequences you snoring donkey!" she screeched.

The blonde woman looked petrified for a moment and then took in a deep breath and bowed low. "Forgive my obstinacy; it wasn't my place," She said in plain flat toned voice which sounded like it was coming from gritted teeth. Maki put her nose in the air and smirked smugly, "See it never happens again" and with that the woman took the waitress to a door opposite the storage room carefully keeping her concealed from view with her own body. Just before she entered the room she glanced back to see Maki berating and yelling at Ebi who shrank away terrified. "…And would you liked to be chained away downstairs again ….." She heard Maki scream as she hid in a nook between the wall and the stairs and dressed. As she tried hard to hear the quieting conversation through the thick wall she determined that even if this restaurant did rob them of their business she and her great grandmother would not work in a place like this.

Once she was dressed the waitress faced the blond woman who was turning to face her in turn. The blonde woman nodded slightly to acknowledge her finishing dressing and turned to walk up the stairs walking slowly to allow the waitress to follow. She watched her for a moment then skipped a couple of steps to follow her. "How timid woman, Ebi know Shampoo cursed?" She asked.

The blonde woman turned and stared perplexedly at the purple manned waitress "I beg your pardon?" she asked one eyebrow raised. The waitress overlooked the obvious curiosity in the woman's voice having dealt with others unable to understand her and continued. "My Japanese no good, try hard to careful listen. My name Shampoo and Shampoo want to no how timid woman name Ebi know of curse".

The woman had to take a moment to understand than when the realization grasped her she nodded her head and made a slight oooh sound then turned and continued up the stairs. "It's nice to meet you Shampoo, my names Gyoku. Sorry about Miso she gets a little rambunctious at times especially when she meets someone new, you're not too shook up I hope?" Gyoku asked not turning around.

By now the two had reached the top of the second staircase and were now on the second dining level the previous level being two large luxurious bathrooms one side for men other for women. Shampoo, though she never got to actually look at the bathrooms was once again fearful for her café's survival. "Yes I not hurt but, you no answer Shampoo, how Ebi know of Jusenkyo curse?" She asked a little more firmly. Gyoku wasn't listening she was busy talking to another woman who was working behind a bar similar to the one below except the plexi-glass casing was a complete dome with a few holes cut on the inner side to allow the chef's hands through.

After a quick glance around, Shampoo saw why this was necessary. The whole upper level lead onto large spacious decks all bedecked with the same low set Japanese tables and comfy seating cushions several lanterns decorated the deck bars and several small clear glass balls and Chinese lanterns littered the ceiling in many coloured array. From the wall came waterfalls falling down an indent into a wide straight line, which led right to the edge of the deck, and into a small gage to a building wide system of pipes feeding all the waterworks within the building. Several small Chinese bridges led over the tiny rivers along with a small Taoist sand garden on the corner of each of the four sides of the level.

The woman Gyoku was talking too had long tussled orange-yellow hair and ferocious bright neon yellow eyes with slits for pupils. Shampoo walked towards them feeling even more anxious at the sight of this restaurant's interior. Upon noticing her Gyoku turned to Shampoo, "I have a fair amount of work to do, Nori please take care of this young woman she had a nasty run in with Miso" She said and walked away.

Nori turned and looked Shampoo square in the eye and the younger party paled back slightly, those eyes were vicious in some way even as Nori smiled at her. "Well you gotta put up with Miso some times but she has a good heart once you give her a chance" She said shrugging. Shampoo shook her head to rid herself of the slight shock from those eyes "Oh! Yes, Shampoo understand but why sushi restaurant have wolf?" She asked. Nori raised an eyebrow and tilted her head to the side and shampoo deduced Gyoku had informed her of her speech impediment, now the yellow-eyed woman was witnessing how odd it really was. Nori looked to the corner of her eyes and stuck out her bottom lip momentarily which she found a bit curious. "All restaurants need a bit of security and a wolf is very protective indeed" she said.

Shampoo looked to the side, that sort of made sense. Nori reached underneath the bar and pulled out a box with the emblem of a swirling Chinese dragon on the side." Here are the exchange goods for the delivery", She said.

Shampoo took the box and watched as Nori took out a small jewelry box and fiddled around it. "How Ebi know of Jusenkyo curse?" she asked. Nori remained silent and continued to fiddle through the box. Shampoo was getting a little flustered and sucked in a breath of air she hated being ignored. "Why you all work for horrid woman Maki? She very cruel." She asked bitingly. Nori stopped and looked up at her with a very serious expression. "You don't know the half of it, kid." She said and returned her eyesight to the jewelry box.

Shampoo balled up her fists; she considered her curse a very large handicap when the knowledge of it was in the hands of an enemy, after all Ukyo had used it against her more than once. "Why you no answer Shampoo question!" She asked loudly. "I did answer" Nori said calmly still not looking at her. Shampoo didn't notice when her yellow eyes widened and she smiled as though having found a valuable artifact.

"You no answer about..." Whatever had come out of her mouth died away at the sight of what was held up in front of her. Nori was holding up a bright prismatic crystal fastened between two silver Celtic knots which hung from a long silver chain. Shampoo had never seen anything Celtic before not to mention the sparkling radiant stone which captured her gaze. "For your trouble, I know it's early in the morning and you were obviously starving, I hope this makes up for your trouble" She said. Shampoo missed the insincere tone in her voice, the necklace was for her? She could never afford anything like this on her salary and her great grandmother had nothing like this in her jewelry collection. She reached up and quickly took it and examined it as though it would disappear once she blinked. "Oooh! Beautiful! Shampoo love it!" she squealed.

She clapped her hands and jumped up and down with it clasped between her two pressed palms. Wait until Ranma saw her with it on! He'd sweep her off her feet! She undid the Celtic triangle clasp and slid the necklace on. She attempted to redo the clasp behind her neck but this proved difficult, so she held it up to her neck instead. She did not notice as Nori observed her with a sly smile and her face supported on the backs of her hands, which were entwined. She watched as the crystal refracted the light and shot beams all over the satin scarlet fabric of her shirt even with her body blocking the light. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Shampoo love it! She never take it off!" She said bouncing on the balls of her feet.

"Well, I wouldn't recommend that, it's kind of delicate. It should only be worn for special occasions" Nori said. "Or for someone very important" she added slyly. With that she took out a smaller box and offered out her hand to Shampoo. At first she did not know what Nori was doing having not paid attention to her last sentence then quickly gathered her senses and gave the necklace back. Nori carefully wrapped it and put it in the box and placed it inside the delivery case. "Be extra careful with this box while you're riding, the necklace is one of kind" Nori said handing the box to her. Shampoo took the box carefully and hugged it close to her chest. "Shei Shei! Shampoo thank you very much!" She said grinning happily.

As she skipped giddily down the stairs Shampoo failed to notice the toothy evil grin Nori wore.

How could she have possibly been afraid of this restaurant? Sure the owner was close to being a Satan incarnate, but the employees were nice enough, at least nice enough to give her food and that beautiful necklace. Besides the restaurant may be a nicer place than her cat café but it wasn't exactly a family place like her little restaurant, seriously, here there wasn't even a kiddy seat for babies. Shampoo had skipped and hopped all the way down the stairs and out the door and started to mount her bike when she noticed it; a children's play park fenced off and domed within the gardens of the restaurant. She felt her giddiness draining out the bottom of her feet. Was a necklace really worth her losing her business? She would have to work harder to catch her beloved so they could return as man and wife to her Amazon village and live happily ever after.

Well maybe things weren't so bad; after all, that large dragon shaped jungle gym looked scary with its red eyes and sharp teeth and claws. It didn't seem to fit in with the happy looking little merry go round with pretty horses, tiger slide and deer hobby seats. Why have such a terrifying dragon in a child's play park anyway? But then, why have such an awful woman run a wondrous place like this? Maybe she scared away costumers; in that case her little restaurant had nothing to worry about after all.

Chapter two: switched sight

Ranma made his way down the dawn-darkened streets of Nerima. It had been a hard day as usual, his first fiancée, Ukyo had gotten really angry when he tried to avoid getting smacked down by Shampoo's bike as he walked the school halls at lunch. This was justifiable enough except when he'd rushed around the corner to hide from one of Shampoo's clinging, Strangling hugs he'd smashed into Akane and they'd both toppled into a very compromising position. In addition to Ukyo flattening him with her oversized spatula, Akane his second fiancée beat him pretty hard several times with her oversized mallet and thrown him in the school swimming pool.

Akane, that tomboyish fiancée of his, the only fiancé who didn't want to be his fiancée. He found it odd that of all his fiancées, the only one who was involuntary and wanted nothing to do with him completely was the one that caused him the most grief. After all Shampoo and her great grandmother always had some secret ancient magic spice or secret to make his body or mind constantly turn to Shampoo. Ukyo always flattened him with her spatula or tried to make him feel guilty about only being her friend and not her fiancée and always made him stick around for her guilt trips with okonomiyaki. Then there was Kodachi Kuno, "The black rose" as she called herself. The self-proclaimed gymnast starlet, of all his fiancées he was forced to chose from she had no chance whatsoever. She was just as overly dramatic and clingy as her brother Tatewaki Kuno, "The blue thunder" as he called himself. His school's self-proclaimed kendo champion and cheesy love poem linguist. The one thing the two of them didn't share was the limitless amounts of poisons and potions Kodachi always held in store for him to paralyze him for a kiss. The two siblings had one thing in common their obsession with him when he was the opposite gender than they. That and their blindness to his curse and his obverse dislike to them.

One question always plagued him when his fiancées came to call, "Why me?" All he wanted was a simple middle school boy's life, not this constant squabble over who would be his wife. Maybe if his mother Nodoka had her way he would be in his own home with a sane family and a normal middle school life. He cringed at the thought of his mother; oh he missed her ever since his idiot father took him on a life long martial art training trip, true enough. It's just that part of the bargain of taking his infant son away from his wife meant a promise that his father would train Ranma to be a man among men; otherwise he and his father would commit seppuku (Samurai suicide). This had not really bothered either of them until Nodoka came looking for her wayward family with her samurai sword to see for herself if they had fulfilled their promise. This had been a few months after the two of them had left Jusenkyo with their curses plaguing their existence. So in order to avoid a gruesome death, the two of them wore the alias of Ranko, Akane Tendo's cousin and her pet panda. This spared them the two times Nodoka came looking for them though it never spared Ranma the pain of seeing his mother's tears flowing silently when she left.

Maybe she wouldn't have made him commit seppuku if he ever had the chance to explain why her son was now an attractive busty redhead. Ranma sighed in forlorn, oh well, the chance for that was gone now and at the moment he was hungry. He would've liked to have been eating at the Tendo household with Akane and her family. However at the moment his short coiffed fiancée was still red with searing white-hot rage at the apparent molestation he had done to her person, so to avoid maiming he was forced to eat out. He groaned to himself and tucked his hands into his pockets right now he had a real craving for some okonomiyaki but Ukyo was also very angry at him so there was only one option.

He stared at the busy cat café a moment from a few meters away, all he wanted was supper not another bout with Shampoo hanging off him and giggling like a dopey school girl. He was most certainly not in the mood to deal with that old crank of a great grandmother of hers either, and certainly not Mousse. Mousse, Shampoo's near sighted worshiper and groveling slave, from the time he had tried to propose to her as children to the time he fell in the spring of drowned duck when he tried to follow her on her retraining mission. Ranma grinned in slight amusement maybe Mousse and Shampoo might be able to hit it off and get off his back once and for all (if Mousse could ever stop mistaking every object around him for her). He didn't have much of a soft spot when it came to Mousse ,after all, he blamed Shampoo's obsession with him on him and was constantly out to kill him with the infinite number of weapons he had hidden in those billowing Chinese robes of his.

He heaved the greatest sigh yet, and proceeded forward through the doors of the bustling cat café. Usually Ranma would've braced himself for a charging hug and kiss from the lavender haired waitress but currently she was out of sight. Ranma relaxed his muscles and looked around maybe he could get through one supper without being pummeled, as that was the trend as of late. Cologne wasn't at the front cashier only Mousse with those thick rimmed coke battle glasses of his. He chuckled at the sight of Mousse fumbling with the various Chinese dishes, dropping a few, much to the patrons distaste. He never noticed Ranma approaching him his hands clasped behind his back a mischievous smirk on his face. Even though Mousse couldn't see him until at least an inch from his face Ranma knew at the sound of his voice he would launch an all out attack in any various directions in order to strike him. This would mean traction for any of the bystanders eating blissfully away. So there was only one solution; go straight up to his future assailant's face and get the fight over and done with so he could get his meal on the way.

"Heya Mousse, seen Shampoo around?" He said teasingly. In all honesty he could care less were Shampoo could be. He was yet to have a day when she didn't bowl him over or crash into him with her bike. However, he knew one way or another Mousse would find some reason to attack him, so he might as well give him a reason and get it over with. Mousse whipped around so his long black hair flew in a wave and snarled over Ranma's head, obviously missing his position. "Ranma! You Womanizing letch! Can't you go one day without pestering my darling Shampoo!" and with that he reached into his robes and prepared for his "fist of the white swan" technique. Ranma sighed and looked up to the ceiling he really had hoped the myopic Chinese boy would at least start off with some snide comment. "Look Mousse, I" Ranma started sounding bored. However Mousse had interrupted him with his attack. Ranma dodged halfheartedly not only was his poor eyesight causing him to miss, but obviously Shampoo had come home that day the lunch she made uneaten, and very mopey that she had not seen her "beloved husband" as she so often called him. The result of Shampoo's sulky mood was now attempting to flatten his face into the ground.

"Silence Saotome! You have broken my darling Shampoo's bright spirit! You already have a fiancée why harm my love any further?" He screamed as Ranma perched on his head causing him to collapse under the pigtailed boy's weight. That comment made Ranma rage, why would anyone think that that aggravating short-tempered girl would be his fiancée? She never got along with him, she never even tried! They had got along fine when they first met, they could've even been really good friends, but that was only when she thought he was a girl. But when she found out he was a boy, Oh No, then they couldn't be friends, after all she hated boys.

He reached up and balled his hand into a tight fist and sharply brought it down on the back of Mousse's head. "What are you quacking about, duck boy! That uncute tomboy ain't no fiancée of mine!" He said twisting his knuckles on his skull. "Besides I didn't come here looking for Shampoo, I just..." However whatever he had come to do, Mousse never found out for at that moment Ranma had gone flying off of him with the velocity of a jet plane, and into the parallel wall. Shaking himself from a momentary daze Ranma quickly assessed the situation, more importantly who had just catapulted him. Whipping the plaster and rubble from his front he faced the navy haired fury that was Akane. She quickly tossed aside the large mallet she had pulled out of nowhere and growled at her advancing pigtailed fiancée.

"So this is where you've been you idiot! You said you'd help my family clean up the dojo, god you're so useless!" She yelled and any people left after Ranma's failed attempt to keep the peace were hastily leaving. "You said you never wanted me near you again! So I came to get food somewhere else!" He yelled leaning over so she had to lean back. "That doesn't mean you can't earn your keep in my house for once!" She yelled leaning forward so they exchanged positions. "Ha! Your house? Last I checked the only way you'll ever get that dojo is if you marry a good man, and there ain't no one who'd want some hyperactive violent tomboy like you!" He said crossing his arms smugly and turning his back to her triumphantly. "Oh Why you..." Akane readied to pull another mallet out as a retort.

Suddenly a glimmer in the corner of her eye stopped her swinging arm and she turned to see Shampoo emerging from the back room of the restaurant. She paled slightly and only momentarily, she knew the minute the Amazon laid her eyes on Ranma she would be all over him. She knew Ranma preferred Shampoo over her any day, ANY man would prefer Shampoo over her she knew it. After all Shampoo was feminine, a great cook, and had all the qualities a good wife should have. To spare herself the sight of it she pretended to be adjusting the mallet in her hand after all, she still would have to get a hit in on Ranma after the two of them were done cuddling.

He had been promised to marry either her or one of her sisters and even though he never had a choice he still came to live off of her and her family, and wasn't that reason enough for a beating? The anger she felt from the day when they first met was still fresh, after all he should've said he was a boy then she never would've gotten close to him. Why should she ever get close to a boy any way? At least not in a friend like fashion. All boys ever did, as far back as she could remember, was laugh at her for doing boyish things like lifting weights and doing karate. Of course that was only until she reached puberty then those two faced jerks did a complete turn around and chased her and worshipped her for her beauty and figure. Granted Ranma never said she had a great body or face, in fact he said the exact opposite. He still did make fun of her for being so unfeminine and not being as skilled and strong fighter like him, which made him no different than those other jackasses.

She had thought this all over in one instant and in that one instant she had managed to ignore the sound of Shampoo's slippered feet running in her direction. "Aiyaah! Ranma, you no come see Shampoo in so very long! I very happy!" She heard the waitress's soprano voice ring. She turned her head to her mallet and clenched her eyes tight and waited for the inevitable cuddle those two would share. "Here it comes..." She thought to herself and bit her tongue.

Suddenly she felt a large weight jolt against her and something wrap around her neck. She whipped her head up to see a mass of violet coloured hair with a waitress bonnet fastened to it cuddling up to her chest. She looked around hoping someone was going to give her an answer, instead she just spied a stunned Ranma and across from him a groggy Mousse rubbing his sore head. A silence had settled over the Cat Café as Shampoo tightened her loving embrace around Akane's neck.

Akane stumbled back a few feet with Shampoo's body weight and fiddled on her heels to get her balance. Ranma stepped forward a bit and pointed to himself," Shampoo, uh, I'm over here" He said awkwardly. Akane straightened up and raged, somehow Shampoo held on. "So what does that mean! You want Shampoo on you now!" She yelled. "Of course because she's willing to throw herself at you no matter what and you've got all those other fiancées to choose from why not just take them on alternating days", she thought vehemently. She felt the longhaired head under her chin turn towards the black haired boy.

Akane glanced over at Mousse who seemed to be at a loss for words but trying desperately to bring them to his gaping mouth anyway. "Stupid Akane! Shampoo no love you, she hate you!" The high-pitched voice spat. Akane, her shock instantaneously turning to anger looked down at the clingy Chinese girl and gripped her arms in an attempt to break free. "So then why don't you let go of me!" She yelled. Then something happened she never thought she'd ever see, the affectionate girl turned her maroon eyes on her and with an elated smile closed her eyes in happiness and giggled momentarily. "Shampoo love you! Me hug Ranma all day!" Akane's eyes bugged out a centimeter or two, everytime the purple haired girl had ever smiled at her she was planning something horrible to do to her. Remembering this, her eyes narrowed slightly and she bit the inside of her bottom lip. Shampoo was up to something it just involved acting all chummy with her or pretending she saw her as Ranma or maybe that sharp pointy thing sticking into her chest just below her collarbone. It took her a moment to realize Mousse was getting up and walking towards them while Ranma was still walking towards them, stiff and stunned.

"Uh, I'm Ranma" Akane heard Ranma say. That did it! Between Ranma's constant affections on the bubbly waitress and her hugging the two actions had twisted Akane's stomach into a knot of fury. She pulled out a mallet and pushed Shampoo off in one strong swift motion and prepared to beat her unwanted fiancée senseless. Mousse however was on his feet before her brain had told her react and was trying in vain to hit him with the many chains and ropes within his sleeves. She, for a moment, felt sorry for her pigtailed fiancée and considered letting him get away with his offensive behavior until she noticed Shampoo closing in for another hug.

Once she and Mousse were done Ranma lay twitching on the floor babbling incoherently. Akane stomped out of the café her anger remained unseated despite the exhausting beating she had just given. Mousse was busy back at the ramen shop trying to bring Shampoo's pity on himself as she was ecstatic that her beloved had beaten up the wretched Akane and Mousse just for her. On the ground trying his best not to lose consciousness Ranma noticed the bright bauble on the happy girl's neck refracting light from any and all angles as she turned to gloat over his fallen body.

Chapter three: Tainted sushi

Once night had left the little town of Nerima to another crisp morning, Ranma again found himself out of Akane's good graces. On their daily run to school he found himself exhausting his leg muscles to keep up with her as he ran a perfect steady line along the fence separating the street from the drainage ditch. Once the morning had broken to a bright sunny midday Ranma had hoped to reason with Akane over lunch, maybe if he was lucky, a peaceful lunch. It didn't really matter to him that Akane forgave him; after all he had done nothing wrong as usual, to provoke her anger. The bothersome thing was that she was the only one of all his fiancées who actually acted like a normal person around him, she even went so far as to disagree with him, which was completely unacceptable in a wife, so he'd been told. The other thing was usually when she was angry with him she never stopped bothering him about it. Today however she did the exact opposite and ignored him even when he tried to get her attention with his usual insults; she walked well ahead of him and pretended not to hear him.

Now he looked around hoping to see her storming up to him red as blood and mad as a hornet at least then he could get his say in and on top of that he could get the last word something he could never allow her. Finally, he saw it, the short navy coif bouncing and shiny in the sunlight as it made its way out in the middle of the lunch crowd that bustled out to the sunny school grounds. He took in a deep breath and waved his hand in the air,"Hey, Akane! You done cuddling with Shampoo, or have you finally decided to give up catching a husband and change your preference?" He yelled. THAT he knew was the lowest shot yet! She had to turn around and wallop him now, to ignore him now, would defy the fiber of her being. The crowd convulsed and swayed away from her, having been witnessed to her past fits of rage on her fiancée. Ranma smirked when he saw her fists clench at her sides, she was going to really give it to him now, and he'd won!

Akane stopped and looked at him from over her shoulder and he paled backwards and the smile ran away from his mouth. Her expression wasn't that of rage or mischievousness due to the clever comeback in store, but that of total dismissive hatred like she didn't even have the energy to deal with something as loathsome as he. "Why would I need to change my preference at all? With such a dainty little girl like you for my wife?" She said. Ranma stepped back and gasped.

Ouch, that really hurt.

A few gasps from the crowd brought him back from shock and he blushed embarrassed as the rest of the crowd laughed uproariously. Akane's mouth lifted half way in a rakish cruel smile and she turned and left the hallway.

Ranma gulped as his insides twisted miserably, that really hurt. He couldn't believe she'd said that, she knew how sensitive he was about his curse! He didn't notice when the crowd shifted once more and resumed out to the school grounds. "Geez, Saotome, that was harsh" He heard a boy's voice say behind him. He turned and saw Daisuke and Hiroshi standing behind him with sympathetic looks on their faces. He snorted instantaneously and straightened up, one thing he hated was sympathy he was a martial arts master! He needed no sympathy no matter what. "Hmpph! What was harsh? As if a dumb tomboy like that could ever insult me!" He said puffing out his chest and indicating himself with his thumb. Daisuke rolled his eyes and Hiroshi just let go an exasperated sigh, they could always see through Ranma's act. They also knew it was pointless to point it out so Daisuke simply said. "Hey, do you have any money I heard this new sushi restaurant is coming around in a cart giving out samples and meals".

"How could anyone get insulted by that moronic macho maniac chick like that anyway!" Ranma stated.

"That's weird, Sushi's gotta be kept cold or made fresh, they must be making it in the cart as they go along, must be some real good sushi chefs" Hiroshi commented.

"In fact I oughta just go up to her right now and give her another chance to insult me right!"

"Or maybe it's "super special" sushi, eh Ranma?" Daisuke joked referring to Shampoo's "super special ramen" which usually involved some kind of mind changing ancient Amazon ingredient.

"Yeah, that's what I'll do! That way that dumb tomboy won't feel so dumb for the rest of the day!" Ranma said with a forced laugh and jogged down the hallway and out to the school grounds.

Daisuke and Hiroshi simply stared after Ranma a moment then reached into their pockets for lose change, after all they wanted to buy lunch before the fireworks started.

Akane trudged along the soccer field kicking the occasional rock here or there. She'd had it; Ranma could just go to any of his other fiancées from now on because she wouldn't be there for him to kick around any more. Why couldn't he tell why she was so angry? Shampoo was obviously up to something nasty and all that moron could do was make fun of her for it. After everything that had happened whenever that Chinese bimbo came in to play, he was still willing to joke around about it and insult her like he'd been doing all morning. She decided not to even acknowledge his existence. Even when he needed her help, which, knowing him would be any time soon.

"Hey, Akane!" Ranma called from some unseen distance. Akane sped up and jogged to the other side of the field. It was time to start ignoring him completely, and she would start by hiding behind that large tree. Akane slammed her fist on the tree trunk behind her she wasn't ignoring Ranma, she was avoiding him! She clenched her eyes tight no matter how much she tried she couldn't make herself ignore him he occupied so much of her mind. She'd done such a good job of ignoring him all morning, at least looking like she had been. Now she had blown it by running away from him and letting him get to her, that dumb jerk! He'd insulted her so badly, she couldn't get him off her mind. She let her body go slack and she slid down the tree, her knees brought up to her chest and her bowed head tucked behind her folded arms. Why couldn't she just forget him?

"Akane?" She brought her head up and stared ahead into space, let him call for her she'd never let him find her. "Akane? Where are you?" She turned her head in the direction of where his voice was coming from, he had dropped his loud, macho, demanding tone. She held her breath she thought she heard the sound of footfalls behind her she wanted to be ready to stand and walk dignifiedly away from the raven-haired intruder. Many moments passed and she leaned her body to the side and supported herself on her hand trying to peer around the other side of the tree. There was no sign of him anywhere she was safe there for a while.

"Heya, big man!" Akane vaulted into the air and landed five feet from her original position. She turned and saw Ranma standing his arms crossed and his head back guffawing. She clenched her fists tight until they felt numb, oooh, what she was going to do to him! She raised her index finger to make a retort something along the lines of "At least I can be a big man". However she thought of her previous attempts to ignore him and simply stuck her nose in the air and turned from him.

Ranma stood motionless as though someone had pressed a pause button on his body she hadn't given him the reaction he was hoping for. In fact she hadn't given him any reaction at all, something he wasn't expecting. Now was his turn to clench his fists why was she ignoring him? "What is your problem!" He shouted.

Akane turned and gave him that same loathsome look," If you're such a big tough intelligent warrior why don't you figure it out for yourself?" she said. She was about to turn around when she saw it, his face, for just a moment, seemed to fall. She stared at him for a second, was he actually hurt by what she said? In all the times they fought he never showed any kind of pain from her insults, he reacted angrily, but not with damaged emotions.

Ranma had a shamed look on his face and he looked to the side with his hands clasped behind his back. Akane turned to him completely and just stared for a few minutes the awkward silence grating on her nerves. She bit her bottom lip, "Something to say, something to say, I gotta say something" She thought. She again, raised her index finger to say something that would heal his hurt feelings and save her pride at the same time. Ranma looked up at her hopefully.

WHAM!

Ranma blinked confusedly, Akane seemed to have disappeared in a flash of a moment, and he looked around curiously. Upon a second look at Akane's former position he noticed a lavender haired young woman smiling and perched upon a recently airborne bicycle.

Akane pushed the landed moped off her sore throbbing back and rubbed her pulsing forehead. The first time Shampoo's bike had landed on her she was out for several minutes but with constant practice (however involuntary) had numbed her body to her frequent misguided landings. She shook her head to clear the haze in her vision and stared in front of her dazedly. Shampoo was there, happily laying out a many coloured picnic blanket with steaming hot Chinese dishes cluttering the intricate patterning. Why was she laying the delicious lunch out in front of her? Akane could never in her whole time of rivalry with Shampoo understand why she would be so nice to any fiancée of Ranma's unless there was a benefit to her.

"Nihao, Ranma! Shampoo make great feast for you, you like?" She said happily offering out some shrimp balls and melon soup to her. Akane was at a loss for words. She wasn't playing a trick after all; she really thought she was Ranma. Akane looked behind her at Ranma he looked just as confused as she. Upon seeing her questioning gaze he shrugged his shoulders and mouthed the words, "I don't know". Maybe Cologne had given something to her great grand daughter; she was known to do that, after all having Shampoo marry Ranma was just as important to her as it was her grand daughter. Akane leaned in to get a closer look at Shampoo maybe something was done to her eyesight, yes that was it, Cologne had somehow switched hers and Mousse's eyesight for some weird reason.

Shampoo's expression faded and she tilted her head to the side curiously. Seeing this, Akane guessed nothing was wrong with the Amazon's eyesight as she was little more than two or three inches from her face. Maybe she needed to see her face at a distance, thinking this Akane sat back on her knees and waited for the other girl's epiphany.

"Why beloved husband no eat Shampoo grand feast?" The Amazon asked. Akane was even more stunned than the night before and she screwed up her face in confusion, which only made Shampoo's expression blank. Perhaps she needed explaining, Akane opened her mouth to clear the other girl's mix up. All of a sudden Shampoo's head snapped to the side angrily and she glared at something making very loud chomping noises. Akane followed her gaze to see Ranma happily munching away at the side of the picnic cloth.

"Akane, you stupid! Feast is no for you, is for husband! You go away and leave Ranma and Shampoo alone!" Shampoo yelled. Ranma stopped eating abruptly and nearly choked on the dumpling he was eating, in his confusion over Akane's anger with him he'd completely forgotten the incident of last night. He'd failed to remember this when he had sat himself down to eat another one of Shampoo's grand lunch feasts, as was the usual routine. He gawked at her dumbfounded, the last time she had that kind of hateful look directed at him was when she had set out to murder him. He swallowed the hunk of food threatening to block off his air supply, and sorted out in his mind an explanation for the Amazon's confusion. Shampoo suddenly stopped glaring at him and looked around panicked; Ranma followed her desperate gaze and found the seat where Akane had once occupied was now vacant.

Shampoo whipped her head around and glared at Ranma, "Stupid, violent, pervert-girl Akane! You scare away Ranma!" She shrieked in her high-toned voice. Ranma edged back he'd not seen Shampoo that mad at him in along time. He was about to retort in the calmest and most sensible voice he could manage when a large onslaught of water came from the sky and splashed over their heads. Ranma felt his body changing the moment the first drops of moisture hit her skin. She glanced around for the one responsible for the aqua assault then she saw it the furry pointed ears of the lavender cat glaring up at her.

Akane settled the bucket down calmly at her side and watched as the now female Ranma jetted away scared beyond all reasoning. She stared a few moments longer feeling a little guilty for having to use her fiancée's phobia as proof of the now feline waitress's mistake. However the action was necessary as Shampoo was bound to see her mistake now because of it. Akane stared down at the little cat who seemed to be looking at her dreamily, she ignored this and pointed after the terrified retreating Ranma,"You see now? Ranma is the one who is afraid of cats, and that's who just ran away so I couldn't possibly be Ranma, am I right?" The cat didn't respond she simply readied herself on her haunches and leaped skyward to land and nestle in Akane's short navy hair.

Akane slumped her shoulders with the heavy exasperated sigh she heaved. The little cat purred contentedly as Akane realized sadly that Shampoo had come to no realization only the delusion that Ranma had finally gotten over his fear of cats. Giving up completely on reasoning, she reached up and wrapped her hands around the little cat's furry torso and attempted to pull her from her head, the little cat dug in her claws and stubbornly refused to budge. Akane let out a yelp of pain as the little cat purred louder in a show of devotion. The confused girl let her thoughts wander for a solution and subconsciously came upon the idea of how Ranma must feel having to go through with a thing as frustrating as this each day, not to mention with his phobia that sent him into fits of terror. She crossed her arms and closed her eyes attempting to understand the confusing situation. Her eyes snapped open at the sound of a bell ringing and she turned her head to its direction. A large crowd of students were gathered over by the school entrance in the center of them a large thatched roof had made itself known. Shampoo had loosened her grip on her scalp and was turned slightly towards the large crowd.

Akane managed to put her new cat hairpiece out of her mind and made her way towards the strange apparition. She worked her way through the throng and observed an old fashioned cart which contained two women one with silver-white hair fastened into two ponytails by magenta beads the other with tussled orange-yellow hair and neon yellow eyes, both were handing out sushi from opposite windows on the cart. A sleek yellow mare with strange blue eyes and a big blue ribbon in her mane pulled the cart, a gaggle of young girls had gathered around the horse fawning over her giddily. Akane had been so busy wondering what a horse drawn cart would be doing in the middle of a school entrance that she hadn't noticed the small boat of sushi balanced in front of her. She looked up to the person offering the carefully prepared foods and saw the white haired woman in front of her and jumped back at the sight of her heavily browed orange eyes.

The woman giggled at her reaction, "Surprised you didn't I? Well I suppose anyone would, you were in such a trance, you haven't even noticed you have a cat on your head" She said in a childish voice.

Akane was about to retort, as her embarrassment from forgetting Shampoo was still on her head had riled her short temper. She cleared her throat to cool her rage and readied herself with an explanation, for the woman, and the increasing number of onlookers amused by her feline hair ornament. Suddenly Shampoo hissed and reared on her hind legs. Akane looked up just in time to see the tiny cat's flattened back ears and frightened eyes. She also noticed a strange looking necklace wrapped around her furry body and neck. Hanging from it, was a brilliant stone sparkling brightly in the sunlight. She thankfully dislodged her claws from Akane's scalp and quickly leapt away, jumping on each of the heads of the students in the crowd as she went. Akane, as well as many of the other members of the crowd, stared after the retreating feline until there was nothing more to stare at than a sparkle from her necklace in the distance. The crowd hushed again and resumed waiting in line for their sushi. Akane felt a tap on her shoulder and turned around to see the now male Ranma rubbing his head and looking dazed. "What's goin' on?" He asked drowsily.

"You saw shampoo as a cat and went nutso, somebody must have turned you male again" She said conveniently leaving out the part when she had turned him female. Akane felt a twinge of guilt in her stomach, maybe if she hadn't been ignoring him all day that wouldn't have happened. But as usual Ranma's fit of phobia activated hysteria was gone due to his curse and he couldn't remember who had changed him female, so there was no reason to tell him. He looked up at her with a dawning expression and Akane quickly turned away. Her gaze settled upon the sushi cart who was holding up the line waiters due to the two women who where settled on in the serving window. The grins they wore were mischievous in some way and they looked at each other with a small giggle. The white haired woman went back to serving the customers while the yellow-eyed woman continued to grin at the pair, "Jumpy little kitten isn't she?" She said earning a few laughs from the crowd.

Ranma and Akane exchanged glances, while the woman seemed to be addressing the crowd she was staring intently at them. Akane turned and left the gathering she suddenly didn't feel very hungry Ranma followed after her, then stopped at what he saw in a far tree adjacent to them. Akane was about to turn and scold him for holding her up until she saw what he was looking at, a small squat figure looking very much like a ninja was perched in the leaves doing a clumsy job of trying to hide his form. "Sasuke" Ranma stated exasperated for he knew whenever the midget servant showed up, his master and mistress were not to far behind.

Chapter four: new players

"What? Sasuke, have you gone mad?" Even though this statement was calm the voice speaking it was shrill and high pitched with an air of haughtiness. The voice was not so high pitched that it did not shake the luxurious mansion the way it usually did whenever Kodachi was angry. The stump, bristled, figure in front of the black haired gymnast shook, he knew any moment now his mistress would be shrieking at the top of her lungs and throwing any various object within her field of vision. Sasuke had been well adapted to his sibling masters' fits of rage long ago as he had served their family for many a year now and had also grown accustomed to their many eccentricities. However the recent newfound obsession with the Saotome boy and his cursed form had caused his nerves to shatter, he could not understand why they never believed him when he reported that the pigtailed girl and Ranma were one and the same. Then again this particular family wasn't one for reason and he, as always, bit his tongue and tried his best to serve his young master and mistress.

"The Chinese hussy has turned her affections to the wretched temptress Akane Tendo?" Kodachi said drawlingly. "N-no my mistress she mistook the Tendo girl for your own Ranma. It seemed as though she believed that one was the other." He said shivering in his kneeled position. "How peculiar, I was aware of the Chinese girl's ineptitude but to mistake my darling Ranma for the wicked Tendo is almost laughable! Oh ho ho!" Kodachi stated this with a slight chuckle in her voice. "And where was my love during this whole fracases?" She said looking down her nose at Sasuke; she never lowered her eyes to his level. "He had turned into the pigtailed girl and ran away in a fright at the sight of Shampoo in her cat form" Sasuke flinched; he knew what was to come next.

"Fool! Buffoon! How many times must I tell you that my Ranma darling and that horrid pigtailed harlot are two different people!" She shrieked standing up with her hands on her gymnast ribbon. Sasuke squealed at the sight of his mistress's ribbon, if it could be called that, it was thread with thick Kevlar and steel fabric and Kodachi was known to use it on her opponents before a gymnast meet, allowing her to win by default. She was also known to use it to lash Sasuke and any other servant whenever she was displeased, either by them or anything else. "My apologies mistress! I do not know how I could have made that mistake again! Please, please have mercy on me!" He said cowering with his hands over his head. Kodachi snorted and sat back down she took up a teacup at her side, "Good, see that you never make it again, fool" she said scowling.

"Darling little sister, what news does Sasuke bring?" Kodachi turned and saw the kimono clad figure if her brother entering the room, his bokken readily at his side. "Bad tidings my brother, your beloved Akane has become under the affections of the little Chinese girl who waitresses at the cat café", Kodachi said smirking. She had always hated how her brother pined for her rivals, Akane and the pigtailed girl.

"What! How can this be! Have I paid such little attention to my lovely Akane as of late, that she turns her preferences to the female gender?" He shouted his eyes bugging. Kodachi took a sip from her teacup," Well, I don't see the problem, your misguided love to that girl has been most bothersome lately", She said dismissively.

"No! It is impossible, Sasuke must've made some danmedable mistake! Akane would never turn to another woman!" He said mournfully. Suddenly his expression brightened "Unless some sort of black magic seized her like my pigtailed goddess!" he said excitedly his fist in the air as though he'd won a victory. Kodachi raised an eyebrow and glanced at the speech giving Kuno, "What on earth are you talking about my dear brother?" she said looking up at his ecstatic stance.

"That wretched sorcerer ,Saotome must have put yet another spell on one of my beloveds, don't you see? Akane would have none of that vile sorcerer so he cursed her to never love a warrior so noble as myself or any other man for that matter!" Kuno stated triumphantly baling his fists. "Never talk of my darling Ranma like that again! Besides didn't you hear Sasuke? That childish Chinese shrew was throwing herself at her, if anything it's that pigtailed trollop who's caused all of this!" Kodachi shrieked standing up to confront her brother.

"How dare you speak of my radiant pigtailed one like that! She too, hath fallen victim to the wicked Saotome, she is but a delicate damsel in distress awaiting my rescue!" He said gripping his bokken Kodachi didn't flinch she knew her older brother would never harm her. "Sasuke said that the pigtailed insect was running away after the Chinese girl threw herself at Akane. She must have put a spell on my Ranma to make him look like that unfeminine strumpet, and that devious Chinese girl must have found this out before I did!" Kodachi's eyes watered heavily and she turned to look up at the sunset with her hands clasped in front of her. "Oh how horrible it must be to look like that wretch and have his own handsome visage no longer grace this world!" She said overdramatically.

"Mistress that can't be, you see the Chinese girl threw herself at Akane Tendo while she was a cat and Ranma Saotome is scared of those" Sasuke piped in still crouched on the floor. However his voice was drowned out by Kuno." How could you be so daft! My beloved pigtailed one would never dabble in black magic! It was the wretched Saotome who has done this!" Kodachi gripped her ribbon and raised it to her brother's neck. Kuno flinched slightly though he was far stronger than she, he had a strict policy of never hitting the opposite sex, save for the time he set a school wide challenge to fight Akane Tendo for a date. "My darling Ranma is the victim in this scenario, he needs me to nurse him to health and nothing, not even the horrible mask of Akane Tendo, will stop me!" She growled losing her dramatic tone. Sasuke's eyes darted back and forth between his master and mistress as they exchanged blows in their verbal battle, every now and again he piped in trying to explain to the two of what he had observed that afternoon but was always drowned out by the screams.

Chapter five: fights, frights, black rose takes

Ranma sat at the dinner table in the Tendo household his body was throbbing slightly from the sparring session he and his father had that afternoon. He glanced up at the giant panda sitting across from him and smirked as he glared at him, he'd beaten his father once again by throwing him in the backyard pond and activating his curse. The angry sopping panda was about to retaliate when Kasumi, Akane's oldest sister called them politely in for dinner and Ranma had declared himself the victor before his panda- father could blink. Nabiki, Akane's second oldest sister sat beside his father counting the profits she'd gained that day. Nabiki always had money in her hand as scheming and scamming money out of people was her long practiced and fine tuned specialty, more often than not she'd used Ranma's curse and various admirer's to gain profits. Kasumi placed the dishes in front of her family and seemed to be putting on a very happy face indeed, probably due to the fact that she had the day off from cooking as they had ordered out that night.

Even though Ranma was hungry he was not about to inquire about what the family had ordered he was to busy looking at Akane, who like he, had a perplexed look on her face. The events of that day were very odd indeed; what ever had caused Shampoo to think Akane was he? What scared Shampoo enough to run away from her "beloved" just when it looked like he had gotten over his phobia?

"Akane, you look worried, is something the matter?" Soun, Akane's father asked looking up from a family training scroll. Akane flinched a little and looked apprehensive the last thing she wanted was to make her father upset as he was prone to fits of tears over many slight things. She glanced at Ranma who shrugged as if to say "get it over with" and began to regal her father with the day's events. By the time she was done her father had silent tears running down his cheeks and the entire family had stopped what they were doing and listened to the youngest Tendo's story. "Well Akane, you should take it as a complement, it looks like you're attractive to girls as well as boys" Nabiki irked snickering. Akane shot her sister a filthy look, she knew how sensitive she was for not being as feminine as other girls. "I hope Shampoo will have gotten over this delusion, it is most important you two wed and inherit the dojo and we don't need her chasing after both of you." Soun said whipping his eyes. Akane gave a slight shudder at the thought, "If not, then maybe you would know how it feels" she heard Ranma mutter under his breath.

Akane couldn't tell if the quick flash of anger was faster than her reflexes with a mallet, but she didn't have time to tell. Ranma lay on the ground his legs twitching above him as though he were an insect recently squashed. Akane slipped her large mallet into an unknown place. Ranma flipped back into a kneeling position and frowned at his grumbling fiancée he would've had a retort but his mind was still focused on the perplexing events of the day.

"Oh that must be the sushi!" Kasumi said quietly, at the sound of the doorbell she was always the perfect picture of a gentle homemaker. Akane stared after her as she gracefully hurried to the door, she'd always wished she could be just like Kasumi, she was the ideal woman and everyone always said so. She sighed and put her head down, the other thing everyone always said was that she was the complete opposite of her big sister, unfeminine clumsy and boyish.

She felt someone staring at the top of her head and she snapped her head up, she hated it when someone tried to sneak up on her. Ranma was staring at her his eyes full of sympathy masked by a glare; he knew how much she hated being called a tomboy. Even though he was the one who called her that the most, he still only did so to get a rise out of her. Secretly he kind of liked her without all that dainty girly stuff, it was kind of refreshing.

"Oh Ranma the door is for you" Kasumi called from the front hall quietly. He and Akane exchanged glances, with the way the day had been going that could mean either one of them. Nodding to each other silently they both got up and proceeded to the door nervously. Kasumi padded past them as they went by, smiling sweetly. Neither looked to her for an answer as to who or what might've rung the bell as she was quite possibly the most unassuming woman on the planet.

Akane slowed her pace so Ranma could get ahead, now that she had gotten a taste of how an amorous hug from one of his fiancées felt like she didn't care to sample it again. For the second time that day she found herself floored with something pinning her down to the hardwood. She shook herself out of her daze and looked down at the mass of violet hair half done up in two impossibly large dumplings along with two arms wrapped around her neck. She growled annoyed and managed to awkwardly stand while Shampoo stubbornly clung to her. Ranma looked on with stunned amusement, he had been anxious for the time when Akane would get the taste of what it was like to have girls throwing themselves at him, unreasonably staking claim on him.

Shampoo beamed up at Akane ,"Ranma you is no afraid cats now, and you no like Akane, so we go date now, yes?" she said happily. She gripped Shampoo and tried to pry her off "I am Akane, you dolt!" she yelled, the time for reason was long gone, she knew of the waitress's stubborn nature but this was far past tolerance. Shampoo stopped burying her face into Akane's chest and looked up with a hurt expression," Why beloved husband angry at Shampoo? You is no violent tomboy Akane" She stated tearfully. Akane rolled her eyes and tried to push the embracing girl off of her once more.

A rap at the door distracted Ranma from the odd sight before him and he looked over at the open door, having not been closed after Shampoo's swift entrance. The orange haired woman was there she looked a little out of place with her purple dress, and awkward smile. "Uh, Sushi delivery?" She said with a nervous laugh. Ranma was a bit surprised seeing the same woman that day. As he looked closer the woman's faked smile was accentuated by her fierce narrow eyes, which seemed more amused by the situation than confused. Suddenly he was knocked aside by Soun and his panda father who were hungrily slathering at the mouth.

"Thank you so much, I haven't had sushi in so long!" Soun said happily bowing and heading back to the kitchen, sushi boat in hand and at the same speed as he came. Akane, forgetting the loving embrace she was in, grinned up at the unassuming Ranma. He could not understand Akane's expression until the orange haired woman cleared her throat, "Uh, the payment?" She said. Suddenly it dawned on Ranma, "Why you jerks! Why do I gotta pay the bill? You ordered it!" He yelled behind them, of all the times he'd beaten his absent minded and irresponsible father he could never get him to pay the bill on the food deliveries. Grumbling he walked up to the woman gathering the money in his pockets he was saving for his okonomiyaki that week. "Huh, What Nori do here? Does sushi restaurant deliver too?" Shampoo piped up behind Ranma. He looked behind him she was still clinging to Akane but was staring at Nori with what seemed an alarmed expression, not that he could blame her, the woman's eyes were startling to say the least no matter how many times he'd seen them.

"You two know each other?" Ranma asked. Shampoo narrowed her eyes at him and tightened her embrace on Akane's neck. "Is none of nosy girl Akane's business, but Nori from sushi restaurant what trade with cat café" She said. Nori nodded smiling, "I'll be back with the rest of the order" She said and turned on her heel and walked out. Akane, her attention returned to the hug which was quickly turning into a painful clench, tried in vain once more to push the other girl off of her. Even though she had given up on reason she spoke once more,"Look at me will you? I'm not Ranma! RANMA is over there!" She said pointing to the innocent stance of her fiancée. She really didn't want Shampoo hugging him either but at this point that was the lesser of the two evils.

"Ranma, you silly!" Shampoo said and she stood on her tiptoes and kissed Akane on the forehead. Ranma turned away and looked at the ceiling with his hands on his hips, he couldn't understand what was going on and some part of him cringed when Shampoo kissed Akane. He looked out the front door, suddenly very impatient for the rest of the sushi order and turned blue.

Akane stopped trying to push Shampoo off of her when she heard Ranma's scream. She watched as he ran away his hands in the air she turned her gaze back to the door just in time to see a large lithe tiger running after him. She couldn't imagine what a tiger could be doing at her house when she heard Shampoo say, "Ranma, is now Akane who fearful of cats?" The confusion of the situation caused her such frustration that her hair bristled. She brought her leg back and snapped it straight up vertical in front of her and catapulted the affectionate girl into the air. She whipped her blouse with her hands and dusted them off, she could've sworn Shampoo had rubbed off a layer of skin cuddling her.

She brought her hand across her forehead; she worked up a bit of sweat getting rid of the Chinese waitress. "Ranma! You foul womanizing letch! How dare you lay a hand on such a fare delicate maiden? You will feel the wraith of the blue thunder!" Akane looked towards the entrance way though not in surprise, after all it wasn't the first time Kuno came charging up her pathway brandishing his bokken. The horrifying thing was that he was charging at her. Oh, she could defeat the poetic samurai descendent anytime but having been mistaken for her fiancée for the second time that day was sickening. Especially since the first time, she was fawned over and pawed like some kind of child's teddy bear. She sighed and readied herself for a fight though it wouldn't be one she couldn't win in her sleep. Kuno was just about to bring his bokken down when he was intercepted by someone with billowing white robes and long black hair, "Saotome! I will kill you for hurting my darling Shampoo!" Mousse said his accusing finger pointed off target at the side of Kuno's head.

Kuno, who still had his bokken over his head, looked as though he'd just seen a two-headed dragon fly out of his nose. He snarled at the blind Chinese boy in front of him "Buffoon! I am the one who will kill Saotome" He yelled, thinking Mousse was blocking his way instead of addressing him. Mousse brought out a sword from his huge sleeves and pressed the flat side of it across Kuno's face, flattening his nose. "I will kill Saotome and no poetry spouting idiot such as you will stop me!" He snarled through gritted teeth, blowing off his embarrassment at mistaking one person for another. Kuno brought down his bokken and flattened it across Mousse's face similar to his sword, " You will die if you get in my way, blind man! I am of noble blood and am far more worthy of a fight than you!" He shouted. "Than a challenge is set!" Mousse shouted bringing out his plethora of weapons to match Kuno's blows.

Akane watched all of this with mild amusement, slightly concerned about what the fight might do to her front hall. After all, her house and dojo often suffered sudden intrusions and attacks that would rival a bomb squadron. She heard a splash in her backyard and saw the redheaded buxom version of Ranma walking towards her, sopping wet and rubbing her forehead. She stuck her thumb in the fight's direction to clear the confused look off of Ranma's face. " A tiger chased you into the backyard then these two showed up and are now fighting to see who gets to kill you, or me, I uh don't know" She said. Ranma stared at her worried "These two as well?" She said apprehension lacing her voice. It was bad enough having Shampoo wanting to kill her again, but to have Kuno chasing after her as Akane and the pigtailed girl? That was enough to make Ranma think about searching for his mother to commit seppuku.

Akane was about to explain in full detail the situation, when suddenly The redhead in front of her was toppled aside by the bodily force of a leotard-wearing girl with black hair in a side swept ponytail. "Oh, Ranma my darling! You have spurned the affections of those two hussies for me! My heart blooms in the field of roses that is our passion! Now we may be married and live happily ever after!" Kodachi announced her hands clasped together beside her head. Akane was aghast, she shrank back fear rising in her gut, "Oh No, Not you too!" she whimpered. Twice that day she had gotten the taste of what a day in the life of Ranma was like and both times she despised it. She much preferred having Kodachi trying to kill her with various poisons and insane gymnast moves than have her falling all over her like Shampoo.

Ranma peeled herself off the ground and rubbed her head and looked around in a daze," OH HO HO HO HO!" The redhead covered her ears at the sound of Kodachi's trademark shrieky laugh. "Look who comes forward in the face of defeat! It's the pigtailed shrew who had the gall to steal not only my beloved but his name as well!" The gymnast shouted pointing down at Ranma triumphantly. She rolled her eyes no matter how many times she or anyone else tried to tell the Kuno siblings that he was the pigtailed girl and Ranma they always made up some excuse as to why they appeared in the same place at the exact same time. Kodachi even made up some excuse as to why the two had the same name.

The boisterous gymnast wrapped her arms around Akane's torso earning a protesting yelp from the navy haired girl. "Tell her, Ranma darling, who you have chosen as your wife" Kodachi said cuddling into her collar bone. Akane gripped her shoulders causing a pained yell from the other girl, and threw her off, "I AM AKANE! " She screamed, jabbing her chest with her thumb at each word for emphasis. Kodachi became teary eyed and shrank back her hands over her mouth, " Oh, my poor dear Ranma! It's even worse than Sasuke informed! How could I have been so foolish as to abandon you when you needed a woman's care! Not only do you look like that wretched tomboy Akane, you think you are her too!" She said sobbingly.

Akane sighed exasperated and was about to throng Kodachi just to get her out of her house. That is until Mousse managed to misdirect one of his egg bombs and catapulted himself as well as Kuno into the front yard. Mousse was the first to recover and for the first time that night he reached his desired target. "For my darling Shampoo!" He shouted streaming towards Ranma who didn't even blink in surprise. As always, whenever Shampoo was in danger, Mousse was just that much more determined and harder to defeat. Akane glanced over at the entrance way once more, she really didn't want to have to fight Kuno as well.

What she saw was not Kuno but Nori, leaning against the sushi cart from that afternoon. Beside her was a blonde woman with a large blue bow in her hair, on her other side was a large white wolf with orange eyes. The two women seemed amused by the whole situation, but what surprised Akane was that the wolf seemed to be giggling in some sort of wolfish way along with them. The three watched a second longer and then the blonde haired woman walked around the other side of the cart while the wolf hopped into the cart and Nori prepared the hitch on the front. The distinct clip-clop of hooves could be heard and the mare from that afternoon walked out from behind the cart and walked into the hitch. Nori strapped her in, jumped into the driver's seat and quickly they sped away. A realization formed itself in her mind and she opened her mouth to tell her fiancée.

Her head snapped to the side as Kuno latched himself onto Ranma, "OH my darling pigtailed one! What a glorious day that the wretched Saotome has relinquished his hold on thee and left thee to my loving and protective embrace!" He waxed on poetically. Akane felt a pang of relief that at last Ranma, not she was the one who was being clambered over that night. Ranma growled and belted Kuno off of her angrily sending the poetic kendoist through the Tendo roof. She turned to Akane who was about to tell her about what she had seen. However her way was blocked by a smirking Kodachi who had just jumped in front of Akane.

"Fear not my darling Ranma for I will nurse you back to your health and senses!" She said and threw one of her trademark black roses at Akane's feet which immediately let loose one of her carefully concocted poisons.

Ranma cursed himself for not being quick enough to reach the awful black rose. However that was nothing to the shame he felt as Kodachi hoisted the paralyzed Akane over her shoulders. As quickly as she had come, the eccentric gymnast gracefully leapt out of the Tendo household, Kuno following after her clumsily due to his wounds.

"Akane!" Ranma shouted even though she knew she wouldn't be heard she felt the urge to yell her fiancée's name. She set herself up on her hands and feet for a long chase. Suddenly a frowning Shampoo hopped in her way, her hair messy and her clothes out of place from being belted off by Akane. "You no rescue husband! Shampoo not know what you do to make Ranma hate her, but she rescue beloved! Not stupid pervert-girl Akane!" She declared pointing to her.

Within an instant Ranma felt the frustration Akane had been feeling ever since last night and pointed to herself angrily, "I'm Ranma!" she said leaning forward so her nose touched with the glaring Shampoo, who also leaned forward. Suddenly she felt something jab her left bosom she looked down in shock and saw a finger painfully poking her chest. Ranma edged back in shock, no matter how many times she turned female she could never quite get used to those things, "Why you have these?" Shampoo said with an evil smile.

Seeing the other girl's temporarily stunned state she grinned to herself, whirled around and ran out the door, "Mousse follow, and help Shampoo!" she yelled to the blind boy embedded in the wall. Mousse staggered out ,the wall crumbled slightly without its human support beam, "Yes, my beloved Sh-Shampoo, gah." He mumbled, stumbling after the swift Amazon.

Shampoo's boldness had always shocked Ranma before and today was no exception. She shook it off though, as she always did and started to run after Kodachi.

A familiar grunt behind him drew her attention, she wanted more than anything to stop Kodachi before she took Akane inside the impenetrable fortress that was the Kuno mansion. However she knew her father had something written on that wooden sign of his, whether it was helpful or not she had to turn around and see what it was, else she would have him following her. She gritted her teeth and looked over her shoulder, "What is it old man!" she shouted. The large panda had his sign standing as always while he munched away on a piece of sushi. "Don't go barging in headlong like an idiot! Idiot" The sign read.

Ranma's temper flared, "Who's the idiot!" She yelled readying to beat the panda senseless for the second time that day. She ran in a stream line towards the bear her frustration and anger having been bubbling up that day had now reached the boiling point.

"Did you notice when that orange haired woman disappeared that tiger ran through the house? And the same thing with that blonde woman and the horse at the sushi cart?" Kasumi's soft gentle voice whispered. Ranma stopped charging and looked over to the audience that had been watching the entire spectacle at the front of the hallway. Nabiki grinned with that con artist's smile she'd developed so well,"Could it be that they too have fallen in Jusenkyo, is that what your saying?" she commented sarcastically. Kasumi put a hand on her cheek,"Well, oh my! That never occurred to me!" She said while hurrying off to clean the table. Nabiki shook her head amused and followed suite.

Ranma's eyes went blank with contemplation, in her anger she hadn't noticed the odd occurrences with the sushi delivery. She put a hand over her mouth, now that she thought about it; those women did seem to disappear right when those animals showed up. Failing to see that for an oddity, they showed up at just the same time Shampoo had, it didn't really seem like much of a coincidence. That presented a problem; go to find this restaurant and asked them if they knew anything, or race after Kodachi and rescue her fiancée. Ranma already knew her decision, she was not about to chase after those chefs because they appeared at a place at a certain time. However with Soun Tendo behind her she probably would have to think her options over, after all the protective father was a killer whenever he thought Ranma had endangered his little girl at all.

As if sensing Ranma's inner turmoil Soun rushed forward and took up fistfuls of her shirt and yanked her towards his crazed face. Ranma tried to break free; the last thing she wanted was to face his famous demon head attack. "What are you waiting for! Go rescue my daughter! I won't have her whisked away because of an irresponsible husband!" He screamed causing spit to fly in Ranma's face. She spied her father behind him holding up a sign saying, "Tendo, be reasonable!" while looking very nervous indeed.

Unbeknownst to the residents of the Tendo household a black haired figure carrying heavy equipment and wearing a bandana had chosen that time to walk up the front way. He had heard the sounds of the fight a block away and upon hearing the voice of Akane (the girl he loved and his owner when he was a pig) he decided intervene. Unfortunately the boy's sense of direction was less than par and he had taken several wrong turns before he'd reached the desired destination. "Are you Ranma or Akane or am I lost again?" He piped in looking into the lit doorway of the Tendo household. Ranma looked behind her to see her childhood rival Ryouga, staring up at her, his expression slightly hopeful but apprehensive. He'd caught the last words of the argument and from what he could gather, either Ranma was Akane or someone thought he was.

Ranma rolled her eyes as Soun released his grip on her to stare dumbfounded at the lost boy, "Not you too" Ranma sighed as the boy proceeded towards her.

Chapter six: The chef's plight

Outside a small restaurant in the din of the night a figure swept methodically, a large spatula was strapped to her back. Her eyes were invisible beneath the chestnut fringe of her long hair which was held back by a white bow at the top of her head. "Why didn't he even look at me?" Was the thought constantly in her mind. She was so preoccupied she never noticed the walk in front of her store that she had been sweeping was practically gleaming with the layer of gravel she had been scraping off with the broom bristles for the past few hours

The reason for the girl's distress was due to the fact that her fiancé had ignored her completely that day. She had come in to school willing to forgive him for falling all over, all over...that girl! Akane Tendo, the girl who constantly took up all his attention even when she wasn't trying, she had been so obviously angry with him and wanted nothing to do with him but he still kept following her around. He'd walked right past her not even looking at the okonomiyaki she'd made for him. He was such an idiot! Why couldn't he see she was the one who loved him, she had always loved him from the time they were children to the time when fate brought them together again. Well actually a fifteen year vendetta against him and his father had brought them together, but still of all that jackasses fiancées she was the most worthy.

She was Ranma's friend after all, which was more than could be said for Kodachi, Shampoo and Akane. However most of the time she found being his friend was the biggest burden besides those other pesky girls. He always came up to her with hearty clap on the back and a "Heya Ukyo!" he never treated her like a woman. She'd thought once he found out she was a girl he'd treat her differently, but it was still the same as when they were kids. She just couldn't understand it; right after that big fight they had when they were reunited he'd called her cute! Not just cute, his cute fiancée! What a relief, after he and his father had left her behind, people made fun of her for it. Saying she was not a good wife and ugly, not feminine enough to keep her man. The most hurtful insult was that she would never get another man since her family's okonomiyaki cart was gone and she had nothing else for a dowry. Since then she had pretended to be a boy knowing the pain a woman had to feel. She also dedicated her life to becoming the world's greatest okonomiyaki chef, and with her new masculine façade she was free to develop these skills with some martial arts techniques. To have someone see her as a woman after fifteen years and call her cute was wonderful. Not to mention having her fiancée calling her cute it made all those years of suffering worth it.

Without knowing it she had hung her broom and dustpan on the inside of the door and turned off the lanterns. She turned to look up at the moon she and Ranma had done that together so many times when they were kids, it was when they were doing that, she decided she wanted to be his wife. Ukyo sighed, if only he'd known she was a girl then things would be a lot different, if only she'd acted more like a girl then he would see how much she loved him.

She was just about to turn her head back indoors, when something flitted across the moon sending a temporary shadow over her side of the streets. She looked up just in time to see what it was. Kodachi! Carrying on her shoulders an unconscious Akane, and moving with a gymnast's grace across the rooftops. Ukyo had to do a double take, she expected Kodachi to be carrying Ranma, after all she was given to underhanded tactics like that. A part of Ukyo's mind, one she was guilty to have, wanted to let Kodachi go and keep Akane out of the way to her man. She ignored that thought and had already locked up her restaurant and taken to the rooftops.

As much as she hated having Akane in the way she didn't hate her. Akane, unlike Ranma's other fiancées, was only his involuntarily. Her father and Genma Saotome had promised that one day their children would wed. It was not each other Ukyo and Akane had to blame for this dilemma, but Genma; the most irresponsible and selfish father there could be. Besides Ukyo got along tolerably enough with Akane she was the most agreeable of all the other fiancées. If that wasn't a good enough reason to rescue the youngest Tendo daughter, than the fact that Ranma would never forgive her for letting Kodachi go, was.

Ukyo would've gone right up to her and stood in her way but she was exceptionally fast considering she was carrying an extra person. Even if she wasn't going that fast she didn't want to risk her dropping Akane, and she couldn't really stand up to one of her paralysis gasses. So the plan was to follow her until she got to her destination then confront her there. Kodachi snapped her head over her shoulders having heard Ukyo's footfalls on some loose shingles. The okonomiyaki chef was quickly on the ground before her eyes fell upon her pursuer.

Kodachi shifted Akane in her shoulders" Worry not my poor sickly Ranma darling, I will find a way to cure you, and then you will see it is I who will be your devoted and caring wife!" She said. Ukyo nearly tripped when she heard this, was the ever self promoting "Black rose" blind? She heard a pained whimper a few blocks behind her and turned to see Shampoo running across the rooftops, being clumsily followed by her devotee Mousse who seemed to be weighted down by many injuries. Of course! It must've been Shampoo with one of those ancient Amazonian secrets, she'd done this somehow! However that didn't explain why she was chasing after Kodachi and Akane her hated rivals, oh well, there had been weirder schemes before with that girl and her great grandmother. Suddenly she heard a piece of wood crack and snapped her head up to see the gymnast sprinting at a faster pace. She must've heard that jackass Mousse! Oh well, now that the element of surprise was gone she jumped back onto the roof and raced after her prey.

"Stupid Ukyo! You get out of Shampoo way!" The soprano voice of the waitress sounded behind her. Ukyo turned and snarled at her, "Buzz off jackass! Go around if I'm in your way!" She yelled and turned around after her eyesight was attracted to that shining bauble around the Amazon's neck. Normally she would've turned and faced Shampoo, but she really didn't want whatever scheme she was planning to do with Akane to go through. Kodachi turned and let off one of those shrieky laughs of hers,"OH HO HO HO HO HO!" Ukyo tensed her muscles, she knew whenever Kodachi laughed like that it usually meant either a speech or a sneaky move of some kind.

Kodachi flashed an evil grin and pulled out a spiked gymnastic club and hurled it directly behind her. Ukyo laughed a little, that could be dodged easily there was no way throwing it at her could benefit Kodachi. She watched as it impacted with the shingled roof top in front of her and shook her head; sometimes the gymnast's confidence in her own skills was too much.

She heard the high pitched shriek of Shampoo and turned to see her reeling back at the sight of the club, Mousse slammed into her back having not been able to see anything. She was about to puzzle over why the two would be so frightened all of a sudden, when a large explosion snapped her head to the side and she felt the ground beneath her give way. The shock of it and the sudden plummet to the ground forced a yell from her throat as the roof and house fragments clattered about her in shattered disarray. There was a moment of weightlessness and Ukyo used this to flip her body over so she could shield her torso with her arms and point her feet to the ground. She found herself once again thankful for the days she spent in front of her okonomiyaki grill on the ocean cliffs, which was responsible for her chef/martial arts skills. She tried to balance herself out upon landing but found herself wobbling awkwardly as she shielded her tucked in head from the falling debris with her arms.

Once the dust had settled she brushed off her arms and looked about the hole which she had just fallen. The moonlight spilled in seemingly solid looking from the dust and smoke recently stirred up. Luckily the district in which Ukyo lived was mostly businesses and their owners. Owners which, unlike herself, had been selling for so long they lived in their own houses, not the buildings which they made shop. She looked up to check for any wounded bystanders none the less, after all, anyone could've stayed after hours. The exposed floors looked like gaping wounds with their ragged detached floor and ceiling beams and various ripped arrogation pipes. The owners of these newly renovated buildings would not be happy come the opening hours.

"Stupid spatula girl! You get in Shampoo way and make her fall!" She heard Shampoo yell close behind her. She snapped around and glared at the purple haired girl,"It's not my fault your so clumsy, Sugar, besides I probably did Akane a favor, stopping you from doing whatever plan you're up to!" She yelled gritting her teeth. Shampoo put her hands on her hips and stuck her nose out boisterously," Ukyo, dumb okonomiyaki girl! Tendo girl is no anywhere near!" She finished her posturing by pointing at her adversary and laughing. Ukyo raised an eyebrow,"You Jackass! Are you blind? Who do you think Kodachi was carrying away?" She said raising her arm over her head for emphasis. At the mention of Kodachi the two girls jumped an inch momentarily, they'd completely forgotten!

Ukyo jumped up and readied herself to land on a wooden beam sticking out. She let out a squeal of pain as something grabbed the long brunette curtain of hair falling behind her, and yanked her back down to earth. She shook her head and hoisted her body off the ground with her arms and sneered up at Shampoo, who was still holding her long hair in both hands. "Spatula girl not understand? Is Shampoo who rescue Ranma, not stupid Ukyo!" She yelled wrenching the long locks in her hands.

Ukyo did a kip and instantly faced the violet maned waitress while simultaneously snatching her hair away. "Like you could ever rescue Ranma, you jackass! Besides that was AKANE being carried away!" She yelled. She decided to waste no more time and proceeded to jump to the second floor. She was met halfway in midair by a violet streak that would've smashed clean through her as it did the metal tube behind her had she not dodged swiftly. She landed on a half dangling carpet which barely clung to the floor that was now half missing underneath it. Shampoo landed on the opposite side of the hole and snickered evilly both hands clutching bonbori's. Ukyo wanted desperately to continue the chase but she had gotten into fights with the Amazon before, and knew the only way she was going to get any further was by defeating her. She reached behind her and unsheathed her trusty spatula while returning the evil grin her opponent wore.

Mousse tried desperately to focus his already fuzzy and distorted vision through the concussion he was sure he had. He could make out two figures leaping back and forth at the top of the large bright hole he was recently floored into. He squinted to make out one of the figures. He could see a large mass of violet shining in the light trailing behind the lithe female figure, a strange sparkle radiated from her neck. He recognized the high pitched war cry she made whenever she clashed with the other female figure, Shampoo! He grinned, it was a rare occasion that he could ever identify her by sight alone, and when he did there was nothing in the world that could make him unhappy. Whap! He rubbed his head, unfortunately nothing but a hard rap on the head could bring him out of the happy stupor he delved into either. He moved underneath the undamaged roof to avoid any more falling debris. He watched anxiously as the woman he worshipped so dearly fought with the grace and ferocity he was always mesmerized by.

Chapter seven: In another's shoes

Akane opened her eyes wearily; a strange sort of fuzz seemed to cover her body and her mouth tasted sticky and dry. She was really comfortable the soft and warm thing she was wrapped in seemed to be cloudlike in feel. She scrunched her nose up and attempted to sit up her ears were ringing uncomfortably. Something was weighing her down it was covering her up to her chin, she pushed it off as her memories started to form in her brain. Her vision cleared as she sat up, her breath was taken away as she took in her surroundings. A huge room covered with black and gold leafing at the edges along with ancient Japanese vases and furnishings greeted her vision. The doors were paper and much larger than hers at the dojo, and there seemed to be a strong rose scent in the air. She looked down and saw what was weighing her down, a large heavy quilt spread over the impossibly large bed she was laying on. She glanced at her own body wearily, as her memory had told her of what had happened before she lost consciousness. Kodachi could have done anything to her while she was out and given the gymnast's sadistic nature that could be anything in imagination. She was wearing a man's sleeping kimono, intricately patterned and soft.

Akane looked to her side and jumped back a foot, a smiling kimono clad Kodachi was by the bed side a first aid kit and hot water wipe in hand. "Oh Ranma darling, at last you awaken! Please do forgive my straight forwardness, but I had to take you to get the best medical care that poverty stricken Tendo family could never have given!" She said, teary eyed. Akane paled and shrank back this had gone beyond annoying; now she felt fear rising into a broiling bile in her stomach. Kodachi took no notice of this as she reached over and wiped her forehead with a cloth. "I do hope you like the garb I had made for you; I couldn't very well have my future husband running around in girls' clothing." She said. Akane took a deep breath and closed her eyes; she was trying desperately to calm herself, as well as taking this in. Shampoo and the two Kuno siblings really thought she was Ranma. Kodachi had whisked her away thinking she was going to nurse her so called husband back to health. Getting angry wasn't an option, trying to fight her way free wasn't an option, neither was reasoning, perhaps trickery though. "Listen Kodachi, I don't know what I was thinking! It's a little more than obvious I, uh, ain't that, err, uncute ,hmph ,Akane so thanks a lot for getting me better, so now I'm gonna head on home" She choked out while pushing back the covers.

Suddenly the lavish thick door swung open dramatically and a strained looking Kuno came strutting in. Akane half expected trumpets to sound when the proud kendoist entered, the way he carried himself. He marched up to the side of the bed and seemed a little teary eyed while trying desperately to give her a disgusted look. "Saotome, I will forgive you for taking advantage of my family's hospitality and home on behalf of my little sister" He said his bottom lip trembling. Akane could tell from his strained expression he was battling with his reflex to throw his arms around her and shower her with bouquets.

She was still having trouble with being addressed with all of Ranma's names, so she had to take a moment to respond. She shook her head realizing it was she once again being addressed, "Uh hey, no problem Kuno, well I gotta hit the trail!" She said trying to copy her fiancée's crude way of speaking. She made to sit up, suddenly she felt two hands wrap around her arm and jerk her back. She looked to the side to see Kodachi with a very suspicious look on her face, "I understand your shock from my bold behavior, my love, but to not show any gratitude is very rude indeed" She said venomously.

"Hey what are you talking about I did thank you" Akane said annoyed she hated it when she was spoken ill of. "That isn't what I meant! You must see now, that I am the one woman for you! Will you not marry me as we agreed!" She shouted. Akane rolled her eyes; Kodachi still had it in her head that she and Ranma were engaged. The only thing Ranma had ever done was break that crazy girl's fall. She never would've fallen in the first place if she hadn't attempted one of her famous attacks on Akane in order to keep her out of their schools' competition. For some reason she thought it was some chivalrous act to save her life and from then on never stopped pestering him.

"He, I, never agreed to marry you, all that happened was that you fell on hi... uh, me!" She stuttered banging her fist against the soft covers. Kodachi narrowed her eyes and kept her grip." Saotome! You letch! How dare you turn away my sister after she has so graciously taken you in! You will pay for disgracing my family's name!" Kuno screamed and reached for his bokken. Kodachi raised an arm and placed it in front of her brother's chest to stop him. "Forgive me my love!" She said tearfully and pulled out a black rose. Akane tried to pull free but the horrible rose let free its awful contents and she found herself slipping once again into unconsciousness. She fell backwards and felt the covers being pulled up to her chin. She barely heard Kodachi talking." Blame not my beloved for he is still cursed! Ranma my darling I vow to free you of this curse, fear not!" She said dramatically.

Chapter eight: Deer in the hall, pig on the rope

Ryouga ran as gracefully as he could across the moon brightened roofs of Nerima. However his efforts were fleeting as the rope around his waist constantly jerked him forward with the movements of the girl attached by her wrist to the other end. One more jerk lessened the careful hold he had on his patience. "Ranma will you please slow down!" He shouted digging his heals into the tiled roof to aid his stop. He was immediately jerked forward by his waist as Ranma continued her pace unaffected by her partner's stop. "You wanted to come along pig-butt! And I ain't about to be slowed down just cause you can't keep up!" Ranma swung her arm forward causing Ryouga to stumble again, "So if you don't like being tied up, go home cause I ain't stopping to give you directions!" she yelled.

Ryouga grumbled to himself and ran a little faster trying to ignore the occasional violent jerk on the rope. He hated how Ranma always found a way to humiliate him, whether by his curse or his lesser fighting skills. Granted the Saotome school usually lent itself to underhanded tricks. Ranma however managed to make his own moves and tactics, ones which his irresponsible and absent minded father could never teach him. This did earn him some respect in Ryouga's eyes as a rival and Ranma in turn the same. This stopped Ranma from revealing to Akane the truth about her pet pig, but it didn't stop him from poking fun at him.

Ryouga smirked to himself, he knew Ranma was in love with Akane as well, the very proof of that was running furiously in front of him. Though ironically Ranma was far to pig headed to admit it and he had to watch in silent fury as Akane cuddled her pet "p-chan" as she affectionately called him. So that was Ryouga's revenge against his childhood rival, and his pain as Akane only loved him as her pet and nothing else.

"What the heck are you grinning about, pork brain! Keep up!" Ranma shouted while jerking the rope again. Ryouga snarled and attempted for the millionth time that night to over pass her. However Ranma's determination easily gave her the lead again, her annoyance at having him tag along as present as ever. Ranma had only agreed to allow him along to rescue her fiancée on the condition of the rope as Ryouga had the directional sense of a rock. The fact that Soun wanted anyone capable to rescue his daughter along with his future son-in-law probably had something to do with it too.

Suddenly Ranma stopped and crouched down at the edge of a roof; Ryouga skidded and crashed into the crouched figure. "Watch it, idiot!" She shouted while punting Ryouga backwards with her elbow. He landed on his bottom hard and was on his feet ready to pound Ranma. She never reacted to this and simply continued to stare below her. Ryouga's curiosity overcame his anger and he stared over Ranma's shoulder. The Kuno Mansion was impressive and ominous as always but what drew the eye was the recently imploded wall which left a hole large enough to fit a mini van through just at ground level.

Shampoo was peering inside cautiously before she proceeded through, Mousse fumbled just outside before he managed to find the hole." Sweet Shampoo, why do I have to help rescue Ranma? He's nothing but a womanizer!" He shouted. A bonbori sailed out of the hole and impacted with the myopic boy's head," Stupid Mousse no talk about husband that way! If Mousse no help Shampoo than he follow her no longer!" her soprano voice rang from within the depths of the makeshift entryway. "Yes my darling Shampoo", Mousse said wearily while rubbing his head.

Ranma watched as the two disappeared within the confines of the wall then proceeded to leap off the shingled roof. Surprise caught her in the gut as gravity did not take its full affect and she was jerked back by her wrist. She swung a few feet then slammed into the wall behind her; she turned and glared up at Ryouga who had not followed her intended dissent. "What the heck are you waiting for, bacon brains!" She yelled waving her free fist. Ryouga didn't answer he wasn't even paying attention to her he was staring off to the side at something. Rather than yelling once more, Ranma followed her rival's gaze to see what fascinated him so. Behind the corner of the smashed wall, a tall doe with the blackest eyes Ranma had seen was peering cautiously. It was all too annoying that Ryouga had stopped to stare at a deer of all things, though the fact that it wasn't the least bit frightened was perplexing. The doe observed the hole for a moment then gracefully leapt inside after the Chinese duo.

"You held me up to go nature watching! Hurry up dumbass!" Ranma screamed waving her fist once more. Ryouga seemed unfazed by the insult and looked down at his dangling infuriated rival." What would a deer be doing out here? And why did it follow Shampoo and Mousse?" He said. Ranma felt her blood boiling, of all the things to hold her up for! "Idiot! It's probably one of Kodachi's wacko pets! Quit stalling and start moving!" She screamed. Kodachi was given to collecting exotic pets that had her same insane disposition. With that she placed her feet flat against the wall behind her and pushed off forcefully, aiming head down to the ground. She ignored Ryouga's protesting yell as he barely managed to land on his feet as he was dragged behind her and through the hole.

After a few stumbling steps Ryouga managed to keep a steady pace with the ever speeding Ranma after being dragged a few feet. Shampoo was easier to catch up with than the roped pair expected, she seemed to be favouring her ankle, and she seemed ruffled, her clothes were snagged and torn. In addition to her handicapped gait, Mousse slowed her often by running into walls or jumping in front of her. Despite this the duo managed to lose their pursuers by running sharply around corners and through tunnels.

Soon not even the pitter-patter of Chinese slippers could be heard ahead of them. Even though the first time had been unsuccessful Ryouga dug his heels into the ground and leaned backwards. Surprisingly, his rope partner when yanked did not burst forward after being jerked back. Ranma simply turned her head to stare down each corridor and tunnel trying to chose a destination. She snapped her head in the direction of another corridor and fluidly turned the rest of her body in that direction. She immediately started to run down said corridor causing an almost painful jerk on Ryouga's torso. It was then that he guessed Ranma had simply done a simple "eeny meeny miney moe" to choose her destination. "Ranma, will you wait a minute!" Ryouga shouted this time grabbing the rope to stop his rival. Ranma found it was her turn to be jerked backwards and she whirled around to face her rope partner.

"What the hell is it this time, ham hocks!" Ranma screamed grabbing the rope and tugging it violently, Ryouga kept his grip. "You can't just pick any path randomly, we have to try and track Shampoo and Mousse!" He shouted. Ranma sneered and grinned cruelly at him, "I'm gettin' this from a guy who can't even walk one street without getting hopelessly lost?" She said. Ryouga felt as though some one had winded him, it was such a burden to have his tracking skills underestimated due to his handicap.

Ranma tugged on the rope again, it started to slip from her partners grasp. "Listen to me! If we just follow Shampoo and Mousse's footprints then…" Ryouga was interrupted by Ranma. "Look, pork-chop butt! I sure as heck ain't gonna rely on no little lost piglet to help me track those two! Besides you don't even know if they're goin' the right way!" Ranma said and gave the rope one final yank. Ryouga went flying towards her; he never collided, as Ranma had already gone sprinting down her chosen corridor.

Shampoo had finally managed to keep a straight path running after belting Mousse out of her way several times. She now found herself standing in front of a large piranha infested moat; bonbori's clutched tight in her hands. Her figure was barely visible under the black shadow cast over her. She stared up at its owner, trembling slightly, but her eyes narrowed as the jaws of the enormous alligator in front of her revealed its rows of sharp teeth.

Several wrong turns had been taken during this quest through the Kuno maze, many of which she could blame on Mousse. Now that she stood against Kodachi's most fearsome pet, Midoriko, Shampoo wondered if perhaps retreating and finding a different route was wise. The colossal lizard gnashed its teeth and started twisting from side to side menacingly, sloshing the cold moat water this way and that. Shampoo backed up several paces to avoid the splashes of threatening hydrogen, the last thing she needed was to turn into small feline hors d'Oeuvres.

"Oh ho ho ho ho ho!" She heard the shrieking laugh of Kodachi reverberate on all sides around her. Shampoo looked around her to see were the insane gymnast might attack from. The leotard clad kidnapper stood in front of a pair of thick wooden doors encased in two gargoyles holding the frame in their claws. Midoriko swirled it's body around menacingly and snapped it's jaws at Shampoo.

The waitress just barely managed to escape being bitten in half as the alligator's head descended upon her. Shampoo sneered as she came out of her back flip and landed soundly a few feet backwards. Kodachi twirled her ribbon dramatically above her head and let out her loudest howling laughter yet.

"OH HO HO HO HO HO HO! Why don't you just turn around and go home? For no hussy such as you will come between me and my poor ailing Ranma darling!" The gymnast proclaimed pointing at Shampoo boisterously.

Shampoo vaulted into the air as the gigantic lizard attempted to trap her in it's jaws again. She smashed her bonboris clean in between it's eyes as she descended to the ground. The reptile fell just behind the Amazon as she landed neatly on her toes, Kodachi's expression melted.

"Stupid ribbon girl! Shampoo never let you have Ranma!" She proclaimed, and readied to face off against her adversary.

A little further back down the narrow tunnel leading to the battle, two figures could be seen pulling against each other by a fraying rope. "Ryouga, you pig-headed moron! I'm in charge here! We're goin' where I say!" Ranma yelled using both hands to pull her end of the rope.

"Saotome, will you please listen to me! If that deer is one of Kodachi's pets than it probably knows it's way back, we should follow it!" Ryouga yelled leaning backwards and gripping his end of rope tighter. "Like I'm gonna listen to some stupid little side of ham! 'Sides if I follow you we'd probably end up somewhere close to hell!" Ranma shouted, cursing her lesser strength in her female form.

"That will be better than were you're going!" Ryouga shouted back trying not to choke after having the rope grow taught around his stomach. "And just how would you know were that is!" Ranma shrieked pulling harder.

"Because right now you are not thinking clearly!" Ryouga yelled emphasising harder with each pull. "Least I think at all, porky!" Ranma shouted turning around and trying to tug the rope harder over her shoulder.

Ryouga was about to retort when he was suddenly freed of the weight on the other side of the rope. This was of little relief as he was instantly sent flying forwards and landed face first in the dirt. He got up and shook his head; he turned to yell at Ranma for playing such a nasty trick in their current situation. Ranma wasn't staring at him but was looking confusedly at a figure standing over her rival. Ryouga followed her gaze upwards and scooted backwards on his bottom in surprise. Above him stood the tall doe with half of the freshly bitten rope dangling from her mouth. At this closer range Ryouga could see that at the back of her head her fur was longer and was done up in a miniscule bun just at the start of her neck. She opened her mouth slightly and let the rope fall out of her mouth then shook her head slightly. At this Ryouga noticed a small jingling chain fall out of her mouth. From it hung a shining bauble shooting light beams from every angle despite the darkness of the tunnel. Ryouga looked back up at the doe's eyes which seemed nervous in their black depths. However she gave a slight buzzing bray and winked, it seemed, almost mischievously.

Ryouga watched in slight astonishment as the doe bounded away silently. He turned to Ranma in the hopes of getting a solution to the animal's weird behaviour. He heaved a sigh, the tunnel was empty and the slightest distant sound of running feet could be heard further down it. He stood up and dusted himself off and looked down at the doe's tracks and began to follow them sullenly.