I do not own Inu-yasha.
Alone
From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were-I have not seen
As others saw-I could not bring
My passions from a common spring-
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow-I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone-
And all I lov'd-I lov'd alone-
Then-in my childhood-in the dawn
Of a most stormy life-was drawn
From ev'ry depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still-
From the torrent, or the fountain-
From the red cliffs of the mountain-
From the sun that round me roll'd
In its autumn tint of gold-
From the lighting of the sky
As it pass'd me flying by
From the thunder, and the storm
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view
-Edgar Allen Poe
Chapter One
A Lesson in Seriousness
She screamed as her hands slapped against the cold ground. They had fallen right into a puddle and the water sprayed up, gravity pulling the water drops down again. A few hit her hands, some hit her shirt sleeve.
She scrambled to her feet and kept running. She could never stop. Never stop. Not after what had happened. Never.
She turned into a darkened ally, not caring anymore... She never cared anymore. She ran to the end of the ally, screaming and beating against the red brick with her fists.
WHY? WHY? Tears rolled down her cheeks. Was there any hope left?
The strength went out of her finally and she pressed her forehead against the cool brick, her fists still held against the wall. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. How could it of happened? Everything was fine... No.
She was not fine.
She blinked and tried once more to convince herself of the false lie she had conjured up in her mind. To deal with everything that had happened.
Everything is fine.
Everything is fine.
"Everything is fine," she whispered. "Everything is fine. Everything is fine. Everything is fine. I have lost nothing. Nothing at all." She looked to the dark sky, the clouds illuminated by the dim light of the moon. She smiled up at the sky. "Except my mind."
A giggle.
-----------------
She walked more slowly now. More slowly. The fear and pain threatened to overwhelm her. But she could take it. She's taken much more pain. Much more betrayal, broken promises. Nothing left. Was there nothing left for her anymore?
The skies opened up and began crying for her. She didn't care. Not about the rain, not about the fact that the sky was feeling sorry for her. She walked on slowly.
It didn't matter anymore, did it?
A smirk curves the lips.
And then it disappeared as soon as it had came. She stopped and looked into the rain. It carried her bangs back, disappearing into her mass of dark hair. She looked to her right and saw a store was there. She looked more closely at herself and was taken back.
Who was this girl?
Her back-length hair was slick and wet, sticking to her clothes. Her eyes were wide and fear-stricken. They were red too, as well as her nose.
Red... Like his...
She turned away from the window with sadness in her face. She kept on walking until she looked up again and found herself in the park. How long ago had she last came here? When she was really young, surely. She pressed her hand against a tree, staring at its branches.
Why was it that some things stayed beautiful forever? Like a demon, it stayed young for so long, until finally... it just couldn't go on anymore. Was it mocking her? She drew away and kept walking, almost feeling as though her hand was on fire with the tree's hatred.
The swing set came into view and she sat on the very first one she could reach, holding onto the bars with a hand. She pushed herself a little with her feet. Everything had left her. Everything at all.
Had she come to hate herself so much?
Had he hated her?
-----------------
Kagome rose in the quiet morning, staring out at the raising sun. She knew Inu-yasha was in a tree nearby. He was always nearby, to protect and watch over them. Almost like a mother would her child. Such a kind person for the act he put on. She could tell.
"Morning," she said lightly, knowing that he could hear her easily.
A grunt came from the tree a yard away on her left.
She looked over and smiled into the branches. He had been grumpy as usual. He had reason to, seeing as last night had been the new moon and of course, some kind of demon had decided to attack.
Inu-yasha jumped down and went over to her. "You okay?"
Kagome smiled as she knew he was talking about her hand. "Yes, it's fine."
In the fight yesterday, Kagome had her hand hurt by the demon, and of course, Inu-yasha, who hadn't been able to protect her, blamed it all on himself. Such a kind person...
He looked around at the campfire of people, a growl in his voice. "They sleep too much," he said mainly to himself instead of Kagome.
She smiled anyways. "Just give them a little longer. They'll be up before you know it." She yawned and stretched, walking over to her bag so she could change out of her blue pajamas and into her uniform. "I'll be back in a little while," she said, waving.
"Wait," he said.
She stopped and looked back at him. "Yes?"
"Wait until Sango's up."
Kagome smiled. "It's okay Inu-yasha, I'll only be behind this tree here. It's in sight enough."
He was going to open his mouth, but he stopped and let it go. "Fine."
Kagome frowned and put a hand on his shoulder. "It'll be okay, trust me."
-----------------
It hadn't.
She wasn't trustworthy.
It hadn't turned out okay. She had put her trust on something so stupid... What had she meant? It'll. What was it'll?
But nothing was fine. Nothing was fine anymore. Not after what had happened.
He was not to blame. He couldn't blame himself for this one. It was only herself that was to blame. It was all her fault. All her fault.
She gripped the chain harder as her tears fell. She could feel the chain biting into her skin. She didn't care.
Biting, biting, biting...
----------------
-Higurashi Residence-
She's still gone," Sota said.
Higurashi-san frowned. She knew her daughter better than this. What ever had happened? Kagome had just walked in this morning and stared at them like a zombie when they had called her name.
When Higurashi-san had mentioned Inu-yasha, Kagome had looked up with fear-stricken eyes, wide, like they were never going to close ever again. Then Kagome had ran off, not even taking her shoes with her. Just left.
Higurashi-san didn't like the thought of it. Kagome never acted like this. She was bright and cheerful and her happy little girl. What had happened in the Feudal Era?
Grandpa was out looking for her though. They had Eri, Ayumi, Yuka, and Hojo looking for her too. Their families were looking as well. She would of gone out herself, but Sota had to be looked after.
She stared out the window and saw the rain was pouring. Her little girl was out there. Grandpa was out there. Kagome's friends and their families were out there. She hoped that they would return soon, without a cold, but with a wet Kagome that she could comfort and hold to her chest.
A small pain had been nagging at her heart the whole time. This was not the usual pain that she felt when Kagome was gone. That pain was worry. Worry that Kagome would be hurt or... She never brought herself to think any farther than that.
But now that worry was combined with something else.
It felt a little like...
----------------
Loneliness.
That was it. The only thing she could think of right now other than him. He danced around her mind, taunting her, teasing her. She could almost hear him.
She looked in front of her and there he was standing.
She reached out, hopeful, but the image faded and it was just the rain again.
Just the rain...
----------------
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Because your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you'd cry I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away all of the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you'd cry I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
And though you're still with me
I've been alone all along
When you'd cry I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me
----------------
Isn't something missing?
----------------
Poem is 'Alone' by Edgar Allen Poe
Song is 'My Immortal' by Evanescence
End Chapter One
A Lesson in Seriousness
