Chapter 1: 'Future Perfect Nightmare'
(THE PROLOGUE OF APOCALIPSIS)
"- Not one bloody day without his bloody presence!"
"Mister Malfoy! Care your vocabulary!"
A middle-aged house-elf approached her 22 years old blond and elegant (and sexy, I would say) Master Draco Malfoy, as he continued his little parody…
"Ohhh, Harry Potter! Ohh, Harry Potter! Please, can I lick your boot, Marvelous, Perfect Harry Potter?! If I just could adore you more! Do you want an altar?" He mocked shrilly.
"Please, it's just a magazine! Master Malfoy is making such a fuss about –"
"I'm making a fuss about it??? It has a Potter Perfect Fan test as to join a Harry Potter International Fansub!"
"Looks like someone has waked up with his wrong foot this morning."
It was another maid talking to the First Maid. Ah but not to mention all others... the smaller elf-maid had hinted as she was taking some clothes to laundry and, although they haven't developed telepathic abilities yet, even that very last part wasn't missed by the First Maid House-Elf.
"Tsk… useless, useless, Mawee. As always, Master Malfoy's just jealous –"
"Oh – Don't get me started! When I was young it wasn't an unusual thing to kick house-elves bottoms here and there if one ever got me annoyed!"
"If master even considers it…"
Both elves stared a wary stare at Draco, waiting for his reaction.
"Yeah, I know, I know. You are going to denounce me to the Assembly for the Defense of House-Elves' Rights of Harry Potter, right?" Malfoy got on his favorite chair and as he was turning on the TV, "Why don't we just put up a Potter wallpaper so as to see his face everywhere in my house!"
"Oh, that would be just lovely! " Mrs. First Maid received a deadly glare from her master, which she obviously wasn't taking too seriously.
Not really caring what he was seeing, Malfoy started changing channels annoyed. On the TV screen first appear Professor Potter trying to make a rat turn into a Goldemir(whatever that was); then there is an advertising in which Harry Potter promoted a new love potion called "Just what you dream about"; then the fifth Harry Potter's movie, starring the very Harry Potter himself, what would be the equivalent to Michelle Phieffer's daughter and Mel Gibson as Dumbledore (remember this is close to 20 years after our present, right? Well, he's till the handsomest Dumbledore in all history).
"Always the same on the TV. I'm sick of it!"
"You seem to be the only one," the older house-elf maid pointed out cheerfully.
"I still wonder how it can be that he, going trough so many things, didn't finished killing himself," said with a roguish smile on his face at the moment.
"You're only saying that after watching Mr. Potter TV biography on LightSide' s News Channel"
Malfoy was annoyed ('I really don't get how those Gryffindors could buy their personal channel on not-muggles TV'), "Yeah, but he should have died; after being hit by a giant snake or being taken to extreme hunger by his substitute parents –"
"They were his uncles."
"Whatever… I mean, that can, should and must have made someone commit suicide! What has stopped him?!"
Malfoy change channels again: there was a Quidditch mach between Serpentis, his favorite team (almost all there are Slytherin ex-students), and playing against their principal rival, Lioneels.
"Great! Finally, something worthy on the TV," Draco was saying as the presenter announced the arrival of the new Lioneels' seeker; on the screen: ( Do I have to get it clearer?) Harry Potter.
'Bloody Potter had monopolized the whole TV industry!' Malfoy thought as he was turning off the TV. As he was doing this something else turned on...
A Harry Potter Magic Hologram appeared in the middle of the hall, and it spoke to the elderly House-Elf:
"Hello, Mrs. Moppy. Today, you have a busy day: you have to –"
As the hologram spoke, Mr. Malfoy approached his maid.
"I don't know how I let you convince me of this… this…"
"Gorgeous Magical Harry Potter Memorandum Book? "
"Stupid thing"
"Oh, c'mon, Master Malfoy. I know you like it "
"Please, kill me if that ever happens."
"OK "
Draco thought for one second about asking about her not-much-trouble-killing-him attitude (not as if he was liking the 'thing' in advance) but preferred to keep his mouth shut as to prevent another arguing that afternoon with –
"First Maid!"
Of course: He it...
"I have a name, Sr."
"Whatever. It's almost 5:00 PM, where's the tea?"
" 'Please'?"
"Not- going- to –"
"Where was I?"
"You are not making me say it," Draco said dangerously.
"– were you saying, pardon me –? Oh, yes, laundry."
There was a big 'BOOM' noise as Draco got on his feet at once in angry madness, "PLEASE!", with a tone meaning 'Don't make me stand up, stop fooling around and get your stinky little self in the kitchen right now to make that bloody cup of tea!'
The thump of Draco's feet meeting the ground made Moppy start her run (but more like jumping) on her tinny little foots to the kitchen, but not before shouting from a safe distance –
"That was all I wanted!"
Just some minutes later, Malfoy, tired, moved to the stairs but didn't get far. "Not again…" He moved back where he had just passed at the sounds of those familiar noises.
The same scene he was so used to, always at the same hour, every day of the months in his life (if he could call it to himself a life): all his house-elves at the window, staring like freak fans, going hysteric to see that handsome young boy at next door, charmingly smiling, waving his hand at them. Malfoy, like always, went straight to them and shut the shouters down, not missing that last "Hi, Draco!" and receiving a kind smile from his favorite neighbor before doing it, Harry Potter.
Malfoy muttered to himself, "Bloody life. Bloody Potter!" then, looking at his maids, "What are you looking at? Go! Work!" and then, looking at his Harry Potter themed watch…
"What a miserable life..."
Soon, 15 min later, the tea was ready. Moppy placed it at a little table at the hall, which was also the tea-room. This house was much smaller than the one he lived at his childhood ('miserable, bloody life...') although it was the biggest of the neighborhood –more even than Potter's one, he reminded himself.
As he was getting to his usual and comfortable side-saddle and asking not to leave not even one of the maid's Harry Potter 'bloody' magazines near him as not to see "someone's face" ('not for the rest of the day at least') he heard a knock at the door. He looked at his sides waiting, "No one is answering that?"
But the house-elves kept unwavering still; they were really not used to have visit in Mr. Malfoy's house. They were almost scared…
"Ok, so I'll be answering that," Draco said reluctantly while getting up.
He approached to the door when Mawee stopped him, "Wait, Master Malfoy! It could be dangerous!"
Malfoy rolled his eyes, grabbing the knob, "Nonsense!" he twisted the handle but turned to his maids, "I mean, even if it was the Devil himself taking us all, that wouldn't be that bad."
But he was wrong.
Eyes and mouth wide opened in shock and disbelief, body petrified as he has just seen a Basilisk (and as everybody else's), Draco Malfoy stared at a figure outside the door that showed a little bit of embarrassed at being stared by such looks of surprise and having practically the attention of every people in the room.
There, holding a basket with wine and some candies and trying not to look too nervous, it was, standing awkwardly as it finally spoke,
"Er, hello, Draco. It's... it's been time we don't see! Even though we're neighbors... Um, oh, thanks for the basket! It was – erm, nice of you, I guess. I really don't have much room to keep it so I was wondering if we could –" cough "- share it?" A small uncomfortable blush appeared, "eh – Something's wrong?"
There was a tense silence atmosphere for about five seconds and then…
"Harry Potter! Please, c'mon! Join us! It's tea time and Moppy was just about to make some cookies. We all will love to have your company!" Moppy took him by his clothes and pushed him to Malfoy's favorite chair before anyone could complain (being this 'anyone' obviously Draco), "Sit here and be comfortable as Moppy finishes some details."
"Ok. But, isn't this Draco's armchair?" Harry said, feeling a little awkward.
"Oh, Moppy's sure Master Malfoy won't mind taking another chair from the library –"
('—which was also the living room... Bloody life')
And so he goes, the look in Moppy eyes made him understand he didn't have any choice, but not without giving an evil 'I-will-take-your-blood-of-this' look at Harry Potter.
When coming from the living room, he saw all his all-aged house-elves maids behind a wall, ogling Potter like shy fans in love (yeah, which are very difficult to find), whispering in anxiety. Draco heard some comment about he getting mad (not really knowing who 'he' was, if him or Potter) and then he started to have some scary thoughts about revenge, and a scaring, mischievous smile appeared on his face.
"Girls, please, don't be shy!" a very polite (Lockhart-worthy) and strange tone possessed Malfoy's voice which got everybody's attention, "C'mon! Obviously you want to ask some questions, that's totally understandable! Go ahead! He won't bit you! ('Unless he is hungry enough, I guess...') And I bet he won't care to have a few questions answered, right, girls?"
Though the mere thought of Mr. Malfoy being kind to them made them… well, seriously freaked out was saying little, they were totally convinced.
Just a second later Potter was being glomped by a herd of hungry elves fans popping out of everywhere screaming and asking for autographs (some only wanted to touch him –heheh) as Malfoy was laughing his head off at one corner. Moppy got out of the kitchen alarmed by the noise and ran to help Mr. Potter. She ordered Mr. Malfoy to watch out the cookies (nobody will ever know why, but he agreed to it) as she managed to get through the anxious fans to stop them from choking their guest as one was even climbing on top of his head!
Suddenly two figures made their entrance at the room.
"Where is him?"
"Is he still alive?"
Ron Weasley stood on the middle of the room with Hermione Granger by his side. Both, Ron and Hermione, were witnesses of that shocking scene: Draco, getting out of the kitchen, wearing a pink apron; a house-elf with a helmet and broom shock-still in mid getting-them-other-house-elves-away-from-their-guest, and Harry greeting them from what might have been a chair made of pilled tiny dresses, not as comfortable as he should, as a house-elf fell down from his head.
"What the –??"
But Hermione interrupted Ron as she run to Harry worried, "Harry, are you Ok?
"Umm. Yeah, I'm fine."
"Oh! Great! Then, HAVE YOU LOST YOUR HEAD??! WHATAREYOUDOINGINDRACOMALFOY'S HOUSE, FORGOD'SAKE?? Whatifsomethinghappenedtoyou?! You'renotbeingverythoughtful, youknow! Youdon'thaveanyideaofhowmuchweworried –"
"Easy, easy! Breath, swallow – whatever you do! You know, I just came to, you know, make a short visit to Malfoy, that's all."
Draco got very enthusiastic – no, better overjoyed, let's say – with Potter's words.
('Short! He said SHORT!')
"That's what I wanted to ask you! I received a call just some minutes ago that you are visiting Draco Malfoy, trying to make 'peace' – or something – with him when you're supposed to be in a meeting with diplomats and contracts to fund that muggles-wizards peace org. project at this very moment. I mean, what have becoming of you lately? Do you think yourself Mother Teresa or something?!" Ron pointed out to Harry embarrassment.
"Ouch! I totally forgot – I thought this was my day off."
"No, no, but seriously, Draco Malfoy?? Havin' tea?? You don't even know if it'sn't poisoned or something –!"
("Not like I didn't think about that," Malfoy muttered to himself.)
"– not to mention the bad publicity this'll have on you!"
"Ron, I know you're my manager and all that but, seriously, you don't need to worry aboutit" Harry Potter said, obviously trying not to offend the people in the house who, except for the very Malfoy himself, have all been very kind to him, "Besides, I gotta say you sound like your mother, lovely woman as she is," joked Harry smiling as Ron blushed in a shocking red.
On the other side of the room Draco was laughing in madness at the comment as if he was now seeing the Weasel in a pink dress with long curly hair... aaaaand as if he didn't realize he himself was wearing a pink apron...
A knock was heard at the door and Ron went to it, still a little mad, as he went on telling Harry, "Anyway, we must get outta here before anyone can see us", as he was opening the door, "Believe me, it's for your own safety –"
A flash came out from outside, making everyone blind for a couples of minutes before they realize it came from a camera.
"This is for the 'Wizards and Witches' Fantasy magazine'!" Out there was a young boy smiling stupidly, preparing another shot, "Say cheese!"
But before he could take another picture Ron shut the door. Sounding frightened and with a dramatic tone, he said, "Bludgers, we're stuck in here."
