A/N: Whew. My first fic in months and it's SenRu. My first SenRu. Then again, things change, and so do people. What the hell, feel the love. ;)
Sendoh Akira is a selfish, narcissistic bastard who will ravish anything in two legs; he knows it, and he doesn't care. He gets laid when he wants, where he wants, and how he wants without as much as a flippant glance to whoever is the unfortunate object of his raging libido. He attracts male and women alike with his devastatingly good looks and dangerous charm, only to leave them instantly after a maximum of a single hook-up. They weep their hearts out because of him, and he does as much as shrug his shoulders and give off his 500-megawatt smile; he will never blame himself, not even if he learns that he's the reason they want to obliterate their lives. It's not his fault they aren't satisfied with what he can give, it's not his fault they're too gullible to believe his every word, and it's not his fault he doesn't do relationships because they're complicated, obstructive and asphyxiating, not to mention that he has never been truly good at maintaining them to begin with.
He's quite happy with his life; he gets whatever he wants, and he doesn't even have to apologize for it.
FLASHBACK
He dipped his tongue in and out his navel and trailed a sleek path further downward, almost, almost…
BOGBOGBOG!
Sendoh Akira's picturesque dream of hot, steamy locker room sex with the newest gym instructor was momentously reduced to zilch.
Apparently, whoever was on his doorstep right now wanted to tear his door into shreds quite badly with the furious and insistent banging.
"Alright, alright, I'm there," he called out half-sleepily, mumbling something like didn't even get me there, so close while on his way to opening the door.
What greeted him upon removing his door lock was the not so happy face of his best friend, Koshino Hiroaki.
"Hello, Akira. Had a nice sleep?" the shorter guy queried, his face seemingly contorted to an unpleasant, constipated look of failed composure.
"Damn, Kosh, you could've waited a little later 'til you decided to come. It was a good dream, there were handcuffs and leather," he muttered in disappointment as he stepped aside to give way for his best pal to come in.
"Oh it was, wasn't it?" Koshino smiled at him sardonically. "Well, seeing as you have this queer penchant for a teeny-weeny bit of violence in your sexual exploits, fantasies and realities alike, why don't I give you your hanging whimsical craving right now with a fresh morning kick to your groin? Tell me, how'd you like it, standing up, bent over, or on your back?" the other spat out to him venomously, his friend's voice trembling with white anger.
Sendoh turned to his buddy with all smiles. "You've always been so kinky, Kosh."
"Oh please don't, don't you fucking run your mouth on me now, Sendoh Akira, or, so help me Kami, I will pound your balls to bits with a sledgehammer and sew your butthole shut 'til the only thing you can get closest to sex is a zombie-cold peck on your lifeless prick."
Sendoh faltered in pouring a glassful of orange juice for himself, shuddering at the very creative visions instigated by his best friend's threats. Out and truly, Koshino was fuming mad, and he had a very strong inkling it had something to do with him.
"What's wrong, Kosh?" He asked seriously.
"Oh you want to know what's wrong? Here's what's wrong, what's wrong is you always manage to stick your dick where it shouldn't be, expecting me to pull it out for you and clean every single drop of your crappy mess afterwards. I am not your fucking keeper, Akira, need I remind you that every bloody time?"
Sendoh sighed heavily. "Who did it this time?"
"That Chicha or Rika or whatfuckingever the name of that ho is. Barged into my apartment at five this morning, looking for you because, apparently, you swore you two would go take a vacation to Venice sometime, and screaming at my face like a hideous banshee when I told her you fled to Tahiti for a honeymoon with your wealthy fifty-year-old banker boyfriend."
"Venice? I know I've mentioned Vegas, but Venice? That woman's got to be delusional. Well, anyway, good job, Kosh, you're really learning fast," he commended his friend while chewing casually on a cashew nut.
"Akira, you have got to stop screwing everything that moves." Koshino scrunched up his face. "She resembles Shrek, only slimmer, for goodness' sake, how could you have even done the deed with her? And I'm dead serious, you know, I'm tired of cleaning up your clutter. I don't have the least goddamn fleck of an idea why they run off to me, but you better do something about this, or else I'm really just going to leave you for dead…for good." His best friend looked at him gravely.
Sendoh placed his glass on the kitchen counter and gently wrapped his arms around the other's waist, nuzzling Koshino's neck. "Sorry about that, Kosh. I'll make it up to you, okay? Say, want me to set you up with Hikoichi's sister?"
His best friend snorted. "Oh that would just go brilliantly, really, seeing as she fancies you and not me. She'd just end up as another notch on your bedpost and I would have to be the one to answer to Hikoichi when that woman starts bawling." He felt Koshino dislodging himself from the embrace to face him. "I don't need you to find women for me, Akira. I need you to stop making empty promises to your countless objects of interest so they would stop badgering me."
Sendoh flopped down on the couch across the room. "Look…fine, alright, whatever, I'll try."
"You should. Well, aside from the fact that I am the one getting victimized in these situations, which I really should sue you for, asshole, it's not exactly fair for the idiots who fall for your shit, you know," his best friend said, collapsing right next to him.
Sendoh scooted closer to the other. "My excessively adorable best buddy, life is never fair…and perhaps it is a good thing for most of us that it isn't." He winked saucily at his best friend.
Koshino shook his head in resignation. "I really find it so hard to believe that you can quote Wilde in front of me when, apparently, all you're capable of doing is thinking with your dick."
Sendoh smiled at his friend sweetly.
END OF FLASHBACK
Indeed, life is as good as it's going to get for Sendoh. One can say that it's quite a perfect paradigm of gratifying bliss in paradise, and yet it doesn't begin to explain why in spite of his free-living existence, in spite of having numerous men and women kissing his feet, in spite of having everything, he is on his way now to another midnight tryst with a certain partner, and a bloke no less. It doesn't begin to explain why he has broken his never more than once rule for this certain person, and it most certainly doesn't begin to explain why he's treading a far too perilous journey of a semi-nonexistent relationship with his high school basketball rival, Rukawa Kaede.
He remembers the first time he sees Rukawa as more than simply his best on-court nemesis.
It was during his second year in college, at a random holiday bash in Kanagawa.
FLASHBACK
The party had been in full swing for four whole hours, and needless to say, almost everyone's already tremendously pissed. Except for Sendoh. He's far too clever to allow himself to get wasted and have some random woman taking advantage of drunken state. Being a mere college sophomore, the least he needed was another human being to support. Worse, he might contract a strain of herpes or some other sexually transmitted disease if he drinks carelessly, and that's something he most definitely would rather do without.
By far, he had been currently trying very hard to lose a random party attendee who seemed truly intent on rubbing her silicone-filled breasts to his face. He had been lucky, very lucky to have escaped two Shoyo female students earlier that night who had done nothing the whole evening but press themselves to him in their short skirts and dangerous stilettos. Sure, he loves it when these women fawn over him, but they were getting really clingy and annoying. He couldn't exactly see clearly with the girls constantly blocking his vision.
Finally, having successfully managed to get away from the woman by means of feigning a trip to the loo, he was on his way out the party when he thought he caught a glimpse of Shohoku's former ace player. Curiously, he followed his line of sight and, indeed, Rukawa Kaede was there, leaning on a wall in a corner, surreptitiously glancing at the people crowding the place.
He knew he could not attribute it to the effects of alcohol, knowing that he's always been damn good at handling his liquor, but at the moment, with the senior clad in a simple black shirt and a pair of jeans, Rukawa was the hottest thing Sendoh had seen all evening.
Determined to live up to his hentai reputation, he walked up to the younger guy, careful to do it with the usual swagger he uses when he hits on someone.
"Why, Rukawa, fancy seeing you here. So…I've heard you've been under really rigorous basketball training. Think you'll get to beat me now?" He taunted the other.
Rukawa looked at him blankly. "More than you can ever imagine, scumbag."
Sendoh smiled, his eyes glinting in fascination. "Cocky as ever, I see…but hey. Hey. Looks like you've also added a few words to your vocabulary. Oh, and not to mention they're not exactly for the saintly, aren't they? Did they teach you those there too?" He was resolute to make the other break, and damn right he was going to do it.
"Go. Away."
Sendoh exhaled heavily. "Well…I suppose it's getting really late. And I still have to get back to my dorm, come to think of it, my roommate's really going to throw me out now. Okay then, so, I guess I'll just see you around?" For a moment, he looked at the other, and slowly, he began to shake his head, grinning wolfishly. "No, I don't think so, Rukawa."
"You're pathetic. Scram to hell, imbecile."
"Wow, BIG words coming from the BIG man. Careful not to hurt your pretty head over them, dearest." For a short while, he thought he saw Rukawa's eyes narrow a little. Oh joy. Sendoh was having the blast of his life driving the foxy lad over the edge.
"Jackass."
Sendoh grinned even wider. "I don't know…what are you going to do about it, Rukawa?" he challenged the other.
"Are you horny, Sendoh?"
In an instant, Sendoh's grin was frozen. He was shocked by the boldness of the statement, especially coming from the seemingly emotionless fox's mouth. And to think he was almost sure he was terribly risking his chances of getting beaten up quite badly. "W…what?"
Rukawa walked right up to him, invading his personal space, and whispered softly to his ear, "I asked you if you are…horny." Then the younger guy slowly dragged his lips from Sendoh's ear to the corner of his mouth.
Rukawa, Rukawa's finally, finally giving in, and Sendoh couldn't believe it. His lips. They were soft and red and hot and ohgod they were setting him on fire.
"Always," he answered back, immediately catching Rukawa's lips with his own. However, before he could even move in the kiss, Rukawa hastily pulled back and stared at him with his usual deadpan façade.
"Then go home and do what you're really best at. Wanker." Rukawa walked away without as much as a fleeting glance.
For once in his life, Sendoh trotted straight home, and went to bed early.
END OF FLASHBACK
It is a windy night, and Sendoh can feel the crisp evening air piercing through his skin. Once again, he is wondering why he is standing on the foxy guy's doorstep right now and ringing the buzzer he has learned to become utterly familiar with. The shrill sound of his buzz slices through the demoralizing stillness around him, the crashing of sound to silence seeming to remind him his fantasy's all over and now's the time to walk away and go back to reality.
He trembles, not because it's chilly, but because he can't.
FLASHBACK
If there's anything that Sendoh truly believes in, apart from every hour should be happy hour and the bed is the best goddamn place to spend it, it's forgetting about everything that has happened and getting on with his life without as much as a second look at history. He had gotten over his little humiliating encounter with Rukawa in slightly over a few hours of sexual abstinence, and he did not know if there was more to it than simply that, but he was up and running again and his act was pulled together more than ever. Rukawa didn't want him. Well so be it.
That's why he could not for the life of him understand why in Kami's name the foxy guy had just knocked at the door of his flat a few minutes back, and was now comfortably sitting on his divan.
"So…care to tell me what brings you here?" he queried, fixing the other guy a perplexed look.
Rukawa looked up. "Aren't you going to offer me anything first?"
"Did you come all the way here to bask in my hospitality?"
"Could be."
He smiled amusedly. "Just tell me what it is you want, Rukawa."
"Did you do it?"
"What it?"
"Did you wank over me that night of the party?"
Sendoh's jaw dropped for a moment, and then he laughed heartily. "You've always been a very interesting person, you know that? Even when we were still in high school."
"Just answer me."
"No. I didn't."
"That's a good sign." And with that, Rukawa stood up and crashed his lips to Sendoh's.
Once again, Sendoh was momentarily dumbfounded, his eyes bulging in astonishment, until, of course, he could not take it anymore and he responded so eagerly into the kiss because it was hot and passionate and his heart was going frantic he thought it would come out of his ribcage. Finally, finally, Rukawa's in his arms and he's not pulling away, and it felt so good he could jump out of his condominium right now and still feel absolute bliss.
This was all unexpected, yet he was more than ready to welcome it with all of him, if only to make that wonderful feeling last and keep that beautiful mouth planted onto his.
After a few minutes, they pulled away from the kiss, both gasping for oxygen.
"What is this all about, Rukawa?" he asked, his forehead still touching the other's, their lips dangerously close he could almost breathe in Rukawa's air. His eyes were tightly closed because he did not know if he wanted to see the shattering truth, yet he felt the painful seconds tick away as he waited for the younger guy's reply.
"We're playing your game."
Sendoh could only doubt if indeed it was his.
END OF FLASHBACK
"Come inside," he hears Rukawa say.
Sendoh could've made a pun out of it if not for the gnawing feeling he has had all evening.
"Yes," he answers. And he does.
Their little rendezvous is over. Again, it is. Sendoh drinks in the sight of Rukawa as the other painstakingly puts back his clothes on, and just every single moment this happens, he is wordless. Rukawa looks so pale and delicate and pure…almost too good for him.
Without a syllable, he gathers all his things messily and poses to turn the knob on the door, until he feels a hand gripping his wrist slackly.
He looks at Rukawa questioningly.
"Stay."
His breath hitches a little upon hearing the other guy's request, but no. No. He has had matters spiraling out of control in the hands of Rukawa, in a lot of situations, but tonight isn't going to be one of them. "No. Not tonight." He shakes his head resolutely.
"Going somewhere else?"
Sendoh smiles half-amusedly. "I don't need to tell you that." Again, he prepares to leave, but the same hand stops him.
Rukawa's doing it again. He sighs in resignation. "What can you possibly want from me?"
"You. Just you." The answer is firm and raw. And final.
Sendoh shakes his head slightly, and laughs derisively. "Just because we've fucked a lot you think you already know what love is. You don't know what it is. Stop trying. Not from me."
"I suppose you do."
"No. No, I don't, that's why I'm going home, and I'm going to take a shower, hit the covers, and forget this pointless conversation ever happened. Now you go do the same thing except for the home part."
"No."
"Pardon?"
"Tell me how you feel."
Sendoh is stumped. That, he has been avoiding that for so long and now that here it is before him, he doesn't think he can hold back any longer. He doesn't think he should, but he yields all the same. He is tired of evading and denying and pretending he's cool with what is going on. Of what he has with Rukawa.
"Okay. You want it, here it is. I like you, I do, and very much so it hurts me just to even look at you. You've been something ever since the moment you pulled that friggin' wanker line on me, and I feel like I haven't been myself over the months we've been around each other because, because…I don't even know. I want to stay and be with you and, so help me Kami, care for you, but I can't. I can't handle a commitment, I don't know if I'm going to last, and I seem to have a real knack for hurting people, so please. Please. Now that you've heard me, you came in right to me voluntarily, I'm giving you a chance to walk away."
Sendoh's chest is full of so much feeling he thinks it might explode, but he waits. He waits for that certain response, that certain statement which will finally drive him back to the real world and tell him his visit to fantasy land is over.
"Okay."
That's it.
Without as much as a tired, half-smile, he opens the door and steps out, feeling lightheaded than ever.
"What are you doing?" Rukawa asks him.
"I'm leaving."
"I still have a few rules to make."
Sendoh halts in his tracks, confused. "What rules?"
"You can fuck whoever you like, just never the same person twice. And you don't kiss anyone in the mouth but me."
"What on earth—" he starts to ask incredulously.
"If we want this to work, we're going to have to compromise." He sees a glimmer of hope in Rukawa's eyes.
And that's when it hits him. Rukawa is agreeing. After everything…the other guy is agreeing. Sendoh does not know what to think.
"Well…what makes you so sure I'm going to work with you on this?" he taunts the other guy.
"In case it has escaped you, you keep coming back to me, Akira. You always do."
And then he sees it. The slightest hint of a smile on Rukawa's face.
And Sendoh forgets to think.
Somehow, it amazes him how he winds up in a strange relationship, and with his former rival, no less, but somehow, it doesn't. After all, he has always been good at surprising himself.
End
A/N: I borrowed three lines from Queer as Folk and one from Oscar Wilde's An Ideal Husband for this fic. They're pretty powerful, and I like them, so there. I hope that's alright. Thanks for reading! ;)
