Note: Toto, Gamera, and other characters are the property of Kadokawa Pictures.
Paths Forward
by
The Analyzer
"I won't ever forget you. So…go. Go, Toto!"
With those final words, Toto found the strength to get on his feet. He turned on the jets near his legs and steam surrounded Toto as he tucked his limbs in and began spinning through the air. He ascended above the towers of the city, making a beeline for the distant shore. Even if Toto was able to peak his head out, he would have lost sight of Toru and the others within the first several seconds of takeoff. A tremor went through his heart at the thought of his young guardian and friend but he kept flying. Toto wouldn't betray Toru's sacrifice and belief in him.
Beyond the roar of his jets, Toto became aware of another sound approaching, a screech of fire and metal. A simple peek out showed that it was the humans' aerial machines, small but gray and angular, coming up at a safe distance on either side of him. They didn't do anything but the pieces of metal attached below the wings made Toto cognizant of what they could and might do if they wanted to stop his escape.
As he neared the city shoreline, Toto sped ahead and swerved several degrees to the right. He then swerved to the left as he passed over ocean water and to the right again, the aerial machines attempting to keep up. He tried to lose them as he went for deeper waters. He needed to go where he could rest and think, and where humans couldn't reach him. But no matter how Toto swerved, the jets lost distance but kept him within their sight. Toto might be faster but the aerial machines had some good speed of their own.
At this point, Toto decided to change tactics. As the buildings disappeared behind him, Toto judged he went far enough across the ocean. With a thrust, Toto went a bit higher in the air before diving into the waters.
A searing cold swept over his body. He stopped spinning, and his head and arms reemerged as he used his jets to swim from the surface. Toto didn't look back at the aerial machines. They most likely weren't capable of swimming. Toto's goal was to make himself scarce before the swimming machines were sent out. So he went into the depths in search of a place where he couldn't be found and be able to spend some time in quiet.
After what felt like an hour, Toto found a small protrusion on the ocean floor to rest against. He sailed over and quietly landed, exhaustion traveling through his limbs. His battle with Zedus and that quick retreat had taken a lot out of him. Toto closed his eyes, his many injuries flaring up now that the adrenaline was leaving him. Zedus had inflicted a lot of painful stab wounds and gashes with that powerful tongue of his, and that left out the bruises Toto received from being slapped around, thrown into buildings, and falling to the earth.
His body was a cacophony of aches and pains. It would take some time until the last of these agonies were silenced. Toto certainly didn't enjoy the experience but found he could tolerate the pain. Toto was from a hardy lot and he hadn't let the pain get him down in battle. He pushed it all into the back of his mind while he focused on the past events that were the several days of his life.
His mind turned first to worry over how Toru and the others would be treated by the men in those intimidating vehicles. From the way they drove toward Toto, they really wanted to acquire him. Toto had the feeling they were the same people who took and pumped him with that liquefied pearl that made him stronger and bigger, and that made Toto apprehensive. So he was quite grateful when Toru, his friends, and all those other kids threw themselves into the intimidating men's path. That was a selfless act and Toto felt warmth in his chest at the concept of those children taking that risk for him.
It didn't seem like a last stand where they put their lives on the line. Toru, the other children, and even Toru's father didn't appear worried about being run over. So Toto trusted they thought it wasn't a deadly risk. Since those intimidating men were so determined to get Toto, though, he was concerned of what they might do to Toru and the others in retaliation. The intimidating men probably want to make their displeasure known for such interference.
If the intimidating men didn't know already, they might grill Toru and the others about Toto, probing their connection to him and his origins. Toto had the sense such interrogations wouldn't be comfortable, especially for children. The children and Toru's father might come away from the experience so unsettled they wouldn't have a restful sleep for many nights. Toto felt a flicker of anger. No one deserved such harassment, especially children who still had much growing up to do.
The intimidating men might watch Toru and the others from now on. If Toto came back, those men would capture him, and punish his human friends to boot. Toru and the others deserved to grow up healthy and happy, without the responsibility of contacting Toto on their shoulders. Toto's heart ached. To keep his human friends healthy and happy, Toto had to stay away from them and the village.
It was necessary, Toto thought. Even if those intimidating men lost interest and slinked off, meeting with Toru wouldn't exactly be safe. Toto would probably be noticed no matter how quietly he slipped out of the ocean or how carefully he stepped around the trees and buildings. That meant Toto had to keep his distance for a long, long time. That likely meant he must never see Toru again. Toto felt that sad ache spread to the rest of his body, and tried to keep it in check. There was no helping the situation. This was for the best. Besides, Toru would probably have done the same for Toto if their positions were switched.
Toru…Toto's thoughts still became warm whenever he thought about the boy. Their bond didn't get to a perfect start but that passion had been strong from the beginning. Toru took care of Toto for a day or two before the boy's father nearly discovered him and Mai spotted him. For reasons lost to Toto, that made Toru's commitment waver. He tried to leave Toto on the beach where the turtle could strike out on his own.
But Toto had been upset and confused – this felt far too soon for them to part. There must be a mistake. Toto followed Toru, the only person he knew, who raised and cared for him, to find out why Toru was doing this and beg him to reconsider. Those efforts got him in the path of a truck but after Toru rescued him, the boy had a change of heart. From that day forward, Toru helped Toto in any way he could. Toto had been so relieved the care and affection resumed he didn't even inquire why Toru felt the brief impulse to abandon him.
Toru commitment was so great he hid Toto from his father and roped in his friends for assistance. Apparently public knowledge of this arrangement was a threat, since Toru and his friends quietly and quickly moved Toto in the dead of night to a shed where they could visit him. Toto had been a bit upset he couldn't be with Toru as much as he liked but didn't complain. If secrecy was what was required to maintain his bond with Toru, Toto would cooperate. The turtle appreciated Toru's efforts. They were a sign the boy loved him very much and Toto was happier whenever Toru could be present. If Toru could be happy, Toto was happy. So when Toto sensed Zedus's approach and that he himself was about to eclipse the shed in size, Toto fled for the forests. Toru would be upset by his charge's disappearance, but anyone else finding Toto and discovering his relationship with the boy was such a threat to their bond Toto had to act.
When Zedus came to shore, and threatened the village and the lives of Toru's father and Katsuya, all concern about secrecy vanished. Toto interceded, fighting even though he was scared and quite outmatched. He didn't know what Toru would make of his turtle-friend being so giant. Not only was Toto too big to take care of, but he displayed himself to the whole world. Toto feared Toru might reject him, abandon him, but the sight of Toru's loved ones being potentially taken away frightened him even more. He needed to do something, and he feared Toru wouldn't understand.
But Toru called for Toto during battle. When the intimidating men took Toto away, Toru attempted to pursue, calling his name, looking so worried. Toru still cared about Toto. No matter how big Toto got, no matter how much everyone knew about him, Toru cared enough to come after him and all of Toto's fears melted away. He didn't struggle when the liquid pearl of his predecessor was pumped into him, the liquid that made his duty more manageable. Toto felt it was his duty to do all in his power to protect Toru and his compassions, and if that meant being experimented on, so be it.
So when Zedus returned, Toto was ready to fight. As he sustained blow after blow, he saw the many humans, many children, who had more time to flee now Zedus was distracted from his desire to feed and Toto found the drive to continue standing up. His encounters with Mai, Ishimaru, and Katsuya showed Toto there were many children like Toru and they needed to be kept safe from threats like Zedus. As the fight dragged on, with no end in sight, Toto increasingly thought drastic action had to be taken. To save Toru and the world he loved, Toto was willing to endure agony and even death to put down Zedus once and for all.
Toru wasn't going to have any of that. He confronted Toto and persuaded him not to sacrifice himself. Toru didn't want to lose another loved one. That startled Toto. Toru wished to keep Toto alive so much the boy risked his life going through an embattled city and up a damaged building to deliver that message and the last jewel. Toru was so young, so inexperienced and yet he did all that because a world without Toto was unbearable. Toto was moved – he couldn't, wouldn't, disappoint the boy like that. So when Zedus rammed Toto out of that building, Toto put all of his concentration in those few seconds of falling on remembering to live and using the last jewel he just ingested to fly like he flew several days earlier. It was because of Toru and his compassion that Toto was able to defeat Zedus in the end.
Toru…Toto wished he could see the boy again. If only Toto could be with Toru, find some way to talk with him and make clear how much the giant turtle valued and loved the boy. It would be so wonderful. But if that couldn't happen, being in Toru's presence would be enough to make Toto happy. Toru would probably get the message with a simple exchange of gazes. Reason soon reasserted itself in Toto's mind, though. He must keep Toru safe, and Toto's future would likely be filled with danger, so Toto had to remain away. It would be lonely for both of them but it was necessary
At least Toru had his friends Ishimaru, Katsuya, and Mai as well as his father to look after him. Toru wouldn't be alone to cope with whatever the intimidating men shall do. They would help him get back to normal life in the village and repair what was damaged. Toto could rest a bit easier knowing they were there for Toru.
In some manners, Toto's fondness for Ishimaru and Katsuya was only a few steps behind his fondness for Toru. Admittedly, when they came over to Toru's home, Toto found their fascination with him a little strange. He didn't know who these boys were and what their relationship to Toru was. They acted friendly enough to Toru and Toto, though, so Toto assumed that even though the pair didn't live in Toru's house, they must be good people. When Toto became too big to live in Toru's house, Ishimaru and Katsuya assisted Toru in Toto's move to the shed. Toto found it significant they got up in the middle of the night and sacrificed time they could have slept for people they weren't related to and his affection for them rose.
So when Toto rammed into Zedus, he was so glad he saved Katsuya and Toru's father from being eaten. Toru's father might have been a source of distress for Toru but that the man saved Toru's friend despite the risks raised Toto's affection for him too. He saw Ishimaru and Katsuya side by side with Toru when the boy called out Toto's name in the city. The pair apparently helped Toru get the jewel back from Mai and Toto found that heartening. That meant they were the types of comrades who were willing to stick beside Toru through thick and thin. With those kind of friends around, Toru was likely to be alright. Toru might find the long rebuilding and recovery process difficult, so it would be great if Ishimaru and Katsuya were around to make it a bit easier.
Mai would definitely also be of help. Though he stopped seeing the girl just before all that Zedus drama started, he felt connected to her, even when he departed the city. Toto couldn't help but suspect she had faith in him and was desperate to help him in some way. Well, she did help and it had something to do with the last pearl Toru delivered. No matter how limited that help was, the pearl gave him that final kick and Toto valued her efforts in that arena.
Though Mai wasn't always supportive of Toto. From her reactions around him, Mai had mixed thoughts about Toto and apparently knew something of his ancestry. That worried Toto. Mai might have persuaded Toru to abandon Toto and be more of a threat to their relationship than Toru's oblivious father. Despite this danger, Toto found he couldn't hold anything against her. She was just concerned about Toru's wellbeing, and as Toto learned in his final battle with Zedus, concern can make you do foolish things.
Mai's feelings toward Toto must have warmed, however. She did help in Toto's move to the shed. When Toto swallowed the pearl Toru threw, there was the telltale feeling Mai had been holding onto it. If Mai hadn't been held up with whatever occupied her, Toto was sure Mai would have stood alongside Toru and the other children in defiance of the intimidating men. His fondness for Mai equaled that for Ishimaru and Katsuya. Toto wished they could have spent more time together.
Toto relaxed as the blare of pain started to ebb. His body was already doing its work. It would take several days, even weeks, but Toto would be healed. Even before Toto's wounds really vanished, he would be able to move again and find some other place to rest and recuperate. Toto wasn't sure how well hidden he was at his current location, so once he was in a better condition, he had to find a more fortified place. He was sure no one would be able to find him anytime soon but better to be safe than sorry.
These concerns compelled Toto to reluctantly disconnect his thoughts from Toru and the others, and focus on his present and future. There was so much to do and consider. As a guardian, he had a lot of responsibility and he needed to explore what those responsibilities entailed. One responsibility was not getting caught. In some way, the intimidating men and the organization behind them did help him. They pumped Toto with enough of that liquefied pearl for him to stand a chance against Zedus. In retrospect, Toto and the intimidating men's interests overlapped. They wanted to get rid of Zedus as much as Toto, and worked with him to help make that goal a reality. Toto was grateful for assistance in that area.
Toto wasn't so grateful for their attempt to recapture him. They likely wanted to use him for other possible monster threats and didn't want him to wander without their supervision. They might come to track Toto in other ways but they wouldn't be able to control his movements and they would just have to deal with it. Toto preferred to move under his own will and make his own decisions. After all, the judgements of the intimidating men mightn't be sound. They didn't foresee the need to protect the building they held him in from monster attacks and, as a result, probably many of number didn't survive.
So Toto shall act on his own, using his experience and mind to keep citizens safe. Granted, his experience amounted to a week, and he found it challenging to put together a plan while fighting Zedus and keeping a safe distance from civilians. But he tried, and Toto's instincts told him the intimidating men mightn't always have the safety of civilians in mind when dealing with threats.
If the intimidating men and their organization wanted to coordinate with Toto against an enemy, Toto wouldn't mind as long as their help was sound. Who knew how tough the next enemy would be? Toto might need allies to assist him in ways that would lead to the defeat of these future foes.
However, if the intimidating men wanted to manipulate him for goals other than defeating monsters, Toto wouldn't be as cooperative. If it involved hurting civilians, doing damage to the environment, or fighting monsters that were otherwise no threat to humanity or Earth, Toto might even go against them. Unless there was a specific danger to people and the environment, the intimidating men should expect only indifference or defiance from Toto.
Future monster threats…he had a lifetime ahead of dealing with menaces equal to or greater than his size. Toto still had a lot of growing up to do, but the "greater than" part could still qualify long after he reached his ultimate height. There were giants of all sorts in the world that Toto could barely comprehend, from those that resembled larger versions of plants and animals to completely alien beings he wouldn't be able to make heads or tails of. A part of him feared these unknowns. How could he defeat an enemy he couldn't wrap his mind around? But the rest of him remembered he had trouble thinking of how to defeat Zedus and he did find a path to victory. He was determined to find that path again and again, no matter the hardships. After all, it was his duty.
Though in his first battle, Toto had Toru and the others to help him down that path…
At once, Toto shook his head. Those humans popped up in his thought processes again. He had to move on, he needed to keep his focus from straying. Toto had to find his path to victory on his own. It was Toto's determination that allowed him to last long enough for Toru and his friends to help out. But it was also cunning. To compensate for any help that mightn't be forthcoming, Toto had to acquire more cunning to locate his enemies' weaknesses.
Toto fought Zedus with great determination but Toto's cunning only extended to beating Zedus by wearing him down. It had been hard enough to keep his brain power while being worn down himself, never mind figuring out a way to pinpoint and attack Zedus's weaknesses. In the meantime, Toto couldn't prevent Zedus from doing damage in the middle of the city. Toto was immobilized until the building that housed him collapsed around his ears. The only excuse Toto would have next time was time, distance, and awareness of the threat. Toto knew he could sense when a new threat was active, so that was one problem out of the way. He wouldn't be serenely cruising through the ocean while somewhere a monster was razing a city to the ground.
Toto's other concern would be finding a location where he could duel a threat, and buildings and humans wouldn't be harmed. Depending on the enemy's goal, they might be more interested in remaining in a city and among humans than attempting to take down Toto. If Toto tried to retreat, the enemy could just shrug and proceed on to their destructive and murderous goals.
If Toto couldn't lure the enemy away with the desire to take down an infuriating foe, then he had to gain the strength to drag them off or keep them in one spot while the humans evacuated. With that strength, Toto could defeat the enemy without having to worry as much about building damage or civilian casualties. It would be difficult, since Zedus and other monsters like him were particularly stubborn in following their goals. As Toto learned today, however, he could be just as stubborn and become even more so as he grew with experience.
Besides, maybe there was a possibility not all monsters need to be fought or eliminated. Surely, there were giants like Toto who weren't interested in causing destruction or could be persuaded in pursuing another path. It was a possibility worth considering. There would be monsters who wouldn't be shaken from their desires and needed to be put down. But just as there were humans who were malleable and capable of reform, there must be monsters who could have a change of heart. If Toto could make these monsters have second thoughts, then not only would conflicts end in a much more peaceful manner (A resolution Toto would prefer in most altercations), but he could maybe gain an ally in the fight to preserve the world.
Toto could and would work alone in such a duty if he must, but if there were monsters who were willing to lend a hand, ones he helped in the past, he wasn't going to turn the possibility down. Not only could it make fights easier, he would at least have some companionship from those he didn't have to fear cursing or endangering by simply being near them. At least the monsters might be so equal in size and power that neither could really endanger the other.
If Toto could, he would sigh. This was all too entirely hypothetical. He was so young and there were so many experiences he could only imagine, not remember. He would only know if these questions had answers when he went through the experience of answering them. For all he knew, Toto might be the only monster around who had any warm feelings toward humanity, and was willing to put himself on the line for them. The most he could hope for was to dissuade some monsters from their destructive ways, and they would retreat back to their strongholds and likely not be heard from again. It would be up to Toto and maybe some cooperative humans to pick up the slack of defending Earth. He had to prepare for all sorts of possibilities.
Really, that line of thought about monsters becoming friends was probably a way to assuage himself about Toru and the others. Toto cringed. It was much harder than he thought to keep his mind away from his dear humans. The possibility of never seeing them again made him feel a low, unbearable ache. It was something he was ready to do to keep them safe from the malice of other monsters or organizations but that didn't mean the pain of such a separation went away. Toto wouldn't be surprised if Toru and the others felt a similar pain in the next couple of days. Toru wanted Toto to be free, not be bound to him. He and his friends risked themselves for that to happen. But that didn't mean Toru and the others wouldn't feel sad over the separation. They would struggle with the pain but try to move on.
But Toru and the others wouldn't remain children forever. Within ten years, they would be adults, able to make their own decisions about what they wanted to do. They might have moved on from Toto, and pursued passions that had little to do with the weird and dangerous world of monsters. But even if their passions wouldn't be related to monsters, whenever news came in of a monster, or Toto in the heat of battle, they would think about him. They would probably smile proudly and hope Toto succeeded in taking down the latest menace. They would still miss him. With the paths adulthood opened up, Toru and the others could even contemplate how to see Toto again.
Would Toto be okay with that, though? Would Toto allow such a reunion to happen or would he have limited say in the matter? It wasn't like Toto could conduct distant communication with his human friends to give the warning. The only way Toto could make his intentions clear would be when they made direct contact. Toto didn't know if he had the heart to persuade his human friends to turn away and not return, or worse coldly not engage until they got the message.
Depending on the timing, whether such an engagement took place during a fight or in the lulls between crises, the encounter could present an even worse danger for Toru and the others. A clever monster or organization could observe this relationship and exploit it by kidnapping or harming Toto's human friends. Toto could be discouraged from helping others or even be used as a weapon. Toto couldn't stand having that on his conscience and wondered what he could do in such a scenario.
Though if Toru and the others knew the risks and took the necessary precautions while still wanting to meet Toto, he had trouble imagining himself turning his nose up in disapproval. They might be days, hours, or even scant minutes but such meetings would be precious to Toto and his human friends. Their bond was the type neither wanted to break or maintain through sheer memory if they had to. Just because neither wanted to be bound to the other didn't mean they had to stop keeping in touch.
And if there was a way both parties could meet without being endangered, Toru and the others were going to pursue it and Toto would feel little inclination to stop them. Not only would it be great for their friendship, they might also inform him of how human society worked, who to trust or not trust, and how to cooperate with plans against enemy monsters. It wouldn't only benefit Toto and his human friends but the rest of humanity.
Even if there were no world changing benefits, though, Toto would still be inclined toward meetings with Toru and the others. After their first few encounters, they could arrange a way to figure out meeting times without monsters or organizations being any the wiser. Then they could hang out, speak with each other, and even play. Toto didn't play much with Toru and the others but when they did, it had been wonderful. Toto wouldn't mind more play in these potential meetings, even if his great size limited the possible games. That was a dream with so many obstacles ahead but it was a dream worth fighting for.
Toto thought of the possibility of a world where the human organizations wouldn't harass him or those he loved, where monster threats could be dealt with in the cleanest and most efficient manner possible, with minimum civilian casualties and maybe even the recruitment of monsters to good. If Toto proved himself reliable and made clear he wouldn't work with an organization's less than kind intentions, then he might be able to meet up freely with Toru and the others once in a while, able to give joy to his friends as well as receive it from those who might be his only companions for his entire life. If there was anything Toto's brief week of existence showed him, it was that paths opened up if one struggled and thought hard enough.
Toto remained where he lay at the bottom of the ocean, the sting of wounds signaling the beginning of a long mending process. That left Toto with little more to do than muse about the possibilities to come. Few of these possibilities were concrete. For all Toto knew, none could be made into reality. The only certainty Toto faced was that another monster battle awaited him and it would be prudent to prepare. Toto would prepare, as it was his duty to protect humanity. But if there was a way to reunite with his human friends and befriend monsters, then Toto would prepare for that possibility as well, no matter how difficult reaching it might be or if it added any more scars that signified his status as protector. After all, Toru and the others would do the same for him.
The End
