A/N:
*sigh* Fuck, what in holy sweet young Jesus Christ's fuck banana's name am I doing? I've written shit before, but this one is totally gonna take the cake. A Twilight fanfic. *shudder* And not just a normal one, but a far-out one. Imagine Leah as a vampire and Rose as a werewolf. Both the traditional kind (well, more or less), not sparkly faggery. See? That's where I'm going. So grab your Pocky and your copy of Breaking Dawn, and hold on tight to your filthy, sweat-drenched cat ear headband and your fangirl photo of R-Patts, because here I go.
~Eresh, the scourge of litterature
P.S. Of course I don't write like Smeyer. No one of you do. If you are so devoted to the Queen of Suethors as to demand all fanfic authors to write just like her, this is not for you.
This is not a fic meant to be a continuation of Twilight – more a molestation – so I'll just pull my own shit out of the bottomless Goatse-hole that serves as my fount of creativity.
Curse, a - what have I done? - Twilight fanfic.
P.P.S. Curse, Eresh's unholy pile of profane words, now in an edited version. I tried to weed out the solid-blocks-of-text that had plagued the first ten chapters for a year now, and I sneaked in a couple of rewordings and new sentences. No matter how much I hate to admit it, there were also a couple of oops moments here and there, mostly in the grammar and spelling departments.
Chapter 1: Eternity
My Edward. Not just for eighty years. Forever. It's still hard to believe, but here I was, sitting with him and my new family, the Cullens.
All the worries I'd had when I was human, the blurry fears of death or sickness, were gone. The Volturi weren't bothering us anymore. I had Renesmee. Nothing to worry about.
"Bella?" Edward's voice was concerned, which brought up murky memories of control and frustration. "We should go hunting. Charlie's throwing the family party tomorrow, remember?" Of course I remembered. "Oh, yeah. Let's go." The hunt had transformed in feeling and difficulty over the past year. Now, it was just something we did.
We jumped out of the second-floor window, effortlessly, a routine movement. The river was something like a small trickle of water on the ground now, something that was easily passable. We lost ourselves in the hunt together, only snapping back from the predator's mindset when we entered the house again. Emmett and Jasper were watching a ball game, between two teams I neither knew nor cared for. Rosalie was reading some shallow fashion magazine, with Esme curiously reading over her shoulder, and Carlisle was helping out Sam and Leah after a quite serious fight they'd had.
Alice was away for the night, sampling the new culture subset of Las Vegas. Even though she'd said it was curiosity, I'd seen her eyes when she told me, and I knew she was trying to feel human, as she must have had felt before all her memories had slipped away. Renesmee was sleeping over at her friend Lily's house, together with Anne, who was a year older. Nessie - no, Renesmee - was good at making friends, and now that the fear of the Cullens was over, she was swarmed by the children of Forks every day. Half a year ago, Carlisle had admitted to the townspeople that we were "different", and in an unusual commanding tone, told them that those who didn't like that could leave. None had left.
Of course, the year had had its complications. It had turned out that Renesmee actually was venomous. Even though her venom had been slower than Edward's when I was dying fourteen months ago, and that Jacob was too strong to feel any effect from her diluted venom, she'd still been overcome once, at Lily's house. Luckily, she was closer to Renesmee than to us, but we'd still had to convince her parents that Nessie was harmless.
"Bella? You're spacing out." Rosalie. Jake and Rose still had a very strained relationship, but she'd softened up, even towards Leah. "Oh? Yeah, maybe." "Bella, you should get something to do. Carlisle reads, and Edward and me play the piano. You can learn it too." I'd gotten that a lot. Music simply isn't me, no matter how much I try. I like listening to it, but playing just can't hold my interest for long. "Sorry. I've tried, you know. It's just not something I can spend a whole night doing." Rosalie's mouth twitched in a tiny smile. "Maybe you could go join up with Alice. You know what she's doing at the time."
Parties. Lots of people. Not me at all. "Mmm, still not me. Guess I'll just have to be bored for half of eternity." I smiled, but it was still quite worrying. "You really should. She's not very talkative at the moment, so maybe you could run to Vegas and try to cheer her up. It's not even midnight yet."
Argh. She knew I couldn't resist guilt trips. "Well, fine. I really don't like seeing her unhappy. Edward?" He turned his head from across the room, by the TV with Jasper and Emmett. "It's not a problem with me, Bella. Now that you can deal with the trouble you always seem to attract, it's fine." He flashed the crooked smile that I'd never get tired of.
"Okay. I'll be going, then. Bye, all."
