Chapter 1:
She wanted to escape, but in her heart knew that she couldn't. Never in her life did she ever think she would be placed her here: outside the door leading to her first ever Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. But somewhere in the back of her mind, Emma Swan knew that this was what she deserved, what she needed in order to survive in this cruel world. For too long she had lived under the controlling grip of alcohol: from waking up with no memory of what happened the night before to crashing her yellow bug into a tree a few blocks from her apartment in Boston. The latter was what finally landed her here in this old church after her sentencing hearing. Since her DUI charge was the first on her record, she was able to escape jail time with a sentence of 2 years probation, temporary suspended license, and mandatory AA meetings in the basement of a local church for the next year. It was tough, but at least she didn't have to call a jail cell home.
Emma took several deep breaths in hopes of calming her nerves, even though she was positive that it wouldn't help at all. Nevertheless, she summed up whatever courage and sense of dignity she had left and opened the door to the new adventure she was about to embark on. The first thing she noticed was how dark it seemed in the room. It was not necessarily physically dark, as if the lights weren't bright enough. The real cause of the darkness were the people in the room. It was as if the building could sense that it was being inhabited by people whose lives were filled with something sinister and self-destructive. Even though her fellow group members were supposedly in recovery, they all seemed miserable and secluded. It made Emma feel even worse than when she had first arrived.
Not wanting to attract any attention she made her way quickly to a seat on the other side of the room, as far away as she could possibly get from everyone else. She noticed that some people were gathered around a table where cookies and lemonade were placed, as if they were here for a party instead of an AA meeting. She took off her red leather jacket to drape on the back of her chair and sat down, waiting for whoever the group leader was to start the meeting. Even though the meeting was supposed to be only for an hour, Emma had a dreadful feeling that it would be the longest hour of her life, and she wanted to get it started as quickly as possible. The sooner she was out of here, the better. Too bad she would have to come back every week for the next year though.
After a few more minutes everyone in the group was finally seated and waiting for the leader as well. Emma counted only 13 people in the group, and was slightly relieved at the low number. At least she didn't have to worry about a huge number of people knowing about the tragedy that was her life. She didn't think she would be able to handle any more judgmental stares like the ones she was already receiving from her friends. Than again, the people around her were probably already dealing with their own set of judgments and criticisms for their behavior, so why would they pass it on to her?
There were two empty seats left in the circle, and everyone in the room was waiting for their occupants so that the meeting could finally start. The door to the room finally opened to reveal a man with messy red hair and a green sweater vest. He wore a smile on his face that did little to brighten the room around him, yet took a seat among the others as if he wanted nothing else in the world than to be here with them. With him was a Dalmatian who laid down at his feet, as if it had been to these meetings plenty of times before. The man and his dog were a weird sight to Emma since she would have never thought that a dog would be a member of an AA group, but ultimately decided to look past that oddity.
"Good evening everyone," the man greeted in an enthusiastic voice. "My name is Archie Hopper and I am the leader of this wonderful group. I would just like to welcome all of you to another meeting, and let you know that I'm so glad you are here with me."
Even though Emma knew that this Archie guy was just doing his job, she couldn't help but feel slightly annoyed by his introduction. Why would he be happy that there were people at an AA meeting? Wouldn't he be happier if these people weren't here? Emma could already feel her annoyance level rising and the meeting just got started. She didn't know how she was going to be able to make it through the next hour.
"I thought we would start out the meeting by giving some introductions about who we are and what exactly brings us here tonight," Archie said. "One of my main goals for all of us is to build a sense of trust so that we're all comfortable with being transparent with one another."
From the looks of her fellow group members Emma could tell that she wasn't the only one who was skeptical of Archie's goal. There was no way Emma was going to reveal all of her darkest secrets to these people. She would admit that she had a drinking problem, but nothing else beyond the obvious.
"So, who would like to start us off?" Archie asked. Everyone was silent for a moment, all looking around the circle nervously to see who would show a sense of bravery. Emma kept her head down and went into her own little world. After a few awkward minutes, Archie decided to take matters into his own hands. He turned to a young woman next to him.
"Belle, how about you go."
The woman named Belle looked at Archie apprehensively, as if she would rather die than talk to the people around her. She was a very pretty girl with curly brown hair, green eyes, and a delicate face. She sat hunched in her chair with her arms wound tightly around her. To Emma, Belle seemed to be physically holding herself together. It did not take a highly intuitive person like Emma to see that this girl was in a lot of pain.
"I really don't feel that comfortable, maybe someone else can go instead," Belle said, her voice having an unfamiliar accent.
"You're going to have to open up to us sometime Belle," Archie said quietly. "You can't keep these things in forever." He gave her knee a reassuring pat, then turned to the rest of the group. "Maybe Mr. Gold can go first for us."
Mr. Gold sat on the opposite side of the circle from Emma, next to the empty chair that was still waiting for an inhabitant. He was one of the oldest members of the group, possibly in his early forties. His brown hair reached just above his shoulders, and in his right hand he held a rather lavish cane. He had a rather dark exterior, yet there was also a sense of confidence that he had.
"I met as well get this over with," he mumbled. "My name is Mr. Gold and I'm a recovering alcoholic."
"And what are you hoping to get out of this group Mr. Gold?" Archie asked. He seemed relieved that the group was actually getting somewhere.
"Well, I'm mostly hoping to get out of this depressing room and away from all these fucking people before I lose whatever I have left of my sanity," he said distastefully. Emma had a hunch that Mr. Gold would not be one of her favorite people at Alcoholics Anonymous.
"Oh Mr. Gold, I'm sure you don't mean that," Archie said. Looking around the room, Emma could tell that she wasn't the only who didn't hold a fondness for the man. A few people had no problem showing the hate on their face.
"In fact Archie, I do. All of us in this room are just low-lifes who have been cast out of society with no hope of ever fitting back in. And not to mention, there are a few of us who are complete ass-…"
Before Mr. Gold could finish his sentence, the door swung open to reveal the last member of the group. To everyone else in the room, he was just another troubled person in their group, but not to Emma. His sparkling blue eyes were the first things she noticed about him; they were so blue that she didn't think they were entirely real. He had messy black hair and a matching scruffy beard. He wore a black leather jacket and matching pants. Even though she wouldn't admit it to herself, this was the most gorgeous man Emma had ever seen.
The man sauntered his way over to the seat next to Mr. Gold, which was directly across from where Emma sat. He gave the group a smile, as if he was at a gathering with friends and family.
"Sorry I'm late mates, had a little work to do at the docks," he said in an Irish accent. Mr. Gold did not hide his look of distaste for the man sitting next to him. Emma got the hint that he did not have friendly feelings towards this stranger.
"Hello Killian, it's nice to see you again," Archie greeted. "We were just doing some introductions to start out group tonight. Would you like to share something about yourself with us?"
"Well I guess it's obvious that I'm an alcoholic, rum being my greatest weakness, other than a nice lass every now and again of course," he said with a smirk. "Unfortunately I haven't had either in a long time, which is a serious tragedy for all of the ladies out there." He gave another smirk and added a wink, which must have been his signature move.
Emma did not even stop herself from making a face, because this guy could not be serious. Yes he was extremely good looking, but he also gave the impression of a guy who was completely full of himself, which was not an attractive quality. She could partly understand why Mr. Gold was not too fond of him; she could feel her own annoyance towards the pretty boy growing. Killian must have noticed her face, because he looked directly across the circle and pierced her with his sapphire gaze.
"I guess this lass isn't too keen on my charm. Haven't seen you here before, but I'm glad I get to gaze upon your beauty now," Killian said with another wink. Everyone else in the circle stared at Emma, which was the last thing she ever wanted to happen at this damn AA meeting. She wanted to blend in, not be noticed, but this stupid Killian was ruining her plan. And she was not happy about it.
"Why don't you stop inflating your ego so we can get back to the meeting?" she said, not hiding her annoyance. "You're not as desirable as you think." Emma did not break her gaze with him, making sure that he knew that she meant business and would not be charmed like other women were.
"I like a woman with a little fire and spunk in her," he said with a raised eyebrow. "But I can't help but think you're bluffing when you say I'm not that desirable." He was challenging her, and Emma hated to admit it, but it was working.
"Well, you got the wrong impression, cause I find you to be slightly repulsive and a nuisance," Emma said. "And whatever charm you think you may have over women is not working on me, so you're wasting your time." Emma could feel the awkwardness that their conversation was creating in the group, but she was not about to let this Irish bachelor win this argument. She might be an alcoholic, but Emma Swan was not a pushover.
"Sorry to tell you dear, but if you keep that attitude up, men will find you repulsive, which puts you in the same boat as me," Killian teased. "Can't say I wouldn't mind being on a boat with you though lass." There was that smirk and raised eyebrow again, which made anger burn in Emma's stomach. She was definitely going to give him a piece of her mind.
"Listen here jackass—," she started, but was cut off by Archie's urgent voice.
"Well that was certainly an interesting uh…conversation, but maybe it's time we move on to someone else in the group," he said. Archie was obviously nervous, but tried to hide it as best as he could.
Emma kept quiet, but knew that this wasn't over. She shot daggers in Killian's direction, but all he did was smirk back at her. He seemed completely unfazed by her though, which just made her even angrier. She could not even pay attention for the rest of the meeting, and did not remember what her other group members said or who they even were. All Emma could think about was this smirking, attractive man, and how he had suddenly become her biggest challenge in Alcoholics Anonymous.
